A/N: Well, this started as a prompt from Charlotte probably about year and a half ago…honestly, I didn't think I'd ever finish it but here it is! Happy Holidays to all you wemma fans still out there!
No.
"It's not possible."
No.
Emma stared wide-eyed and horrified at the little stick in her hand, confirming what her thoughts, and the five other identical sticks on the counter had said: She was pregnant.
After the birth of their fourth child Emma vowed that it would be her last. She loved all of her children dearly but there was only so much she could handle at one time.
The twins had been enough of a hassle and then she found out she was pregnant again. He was unplanned but he was loved all the same.
With four boys and Will working most of the day, Emma found herself busy all the time and throughout the fourth's infancy she was exhausted and said 'no more'.
She discussed it with Will and they agreed that four children was more than enough and he agreed to get a vasectomy to eliminate any further accidents.
Yet there she sat, just 15 months since Nathan's birth, with six positive tests indicating one big accident.
Her head spun, her stomach twisting viciously as she gripped the counter tightly, unable to take her gaze away from the plus sign on the stick.
Had Will lied to her? That was her first thought in her panic.
Would he do that? The more rational part of her brain countered.
Had the doctor made a mistake in the procedure?
She knew that was rare but she knew Will agreed with her about not having more children.
She jumped out of her thoughts with the sound of a crash from down the hall followed then by the high pitched screaming of more than one of her sons.
She closed her eyes tightly, her stomach lurching and she felt the bile rising in the back of her throat. She grimaced as she swallowed it back down, clenching her jaw tightly, willing it not to come back up.
She breathed heavily, in and out through her nose to calm her queasy stomach.
However, luck was not on her side as there was another chorus of screams followed then by a shrill, "Moooom!"
The dreaded thought of what her children could be up to, and with four boys the possibilities were endless, and the thought of yet another one coming to add to the mayhem sent her flying to the toilet, emptying what little was in her stomach.
She whimpered quietly as there was suddenly a loud knocking on the door. "Mom! Benji pushed me!"
"I did not!" Another little voice countered.
"Mommy!"
"Oh God..." She whispered and the combination of the boys, the horrible taste in her mouth, and the burning at her eyes was enough to break the last will she had.
She collapsed onto the floor in a fit of sobs, the sound only muffled by her hands covering her face.
However the sound was enough to catch the boys' attention and they instantly stopped yelling and screaming at each other and there was silence for a few seconds.
Then there was another knock, quieter, followed by a timid, "Mommy?"
Emma could barely register the concerned call of her son and didn't hear the door open a moment later as she lost herself to her tears.
"Mommy!" A sharp gasp pierced the foggy haze around her mind and she felt herself being momentarily shaken and then another shrill cry and the sound of frantic footsteps leaving the room.
"Danny! Danny, come fast, Mommy's hurt!"
Another few moments and then she felt the hand of her eldest son, warm and gentle against her back.
A few quiet whimpers mixed in with the sounds of her own sobs. "Is Mommy okay?"
"Benji, get Mommy's towel." Danny's calm but concerned voice ordered and he continued to rub her back gently.
"Mom..." Danny's voice prodded gently near her ear and she felt the soft material of the towel being pressed against her hands. "Rest your head here, Mom."
She followed her son's guidance, her sobs slowly subsiding, but her body now shaking as she removed her hands from her face and rested her head against the towel.
"What's wrong with Mommy?" Another quiet little voice asked.
"Emmett, she's okay...can you get the hand towel and wet it a little bit?" Danny asked as he turned to his little brother.
Emmett nodded quietly, his little lips curved in a pout as he watched his mother in concern but then he took to his task. He scampered over to the towel rack and grabbed one of the hand towels, then stepped onto the stool near the sink and ran it under the water for a second.
Then he jumped off the stool and ran over to give it to his brother.
"Thank you, Emmett." Danny said, smiling at him briefly before returning to his mother, who had quieted completely but was still shaking, her eyes closed tightly.
He dabbed the cloth on her forehead and she let out a tiny gasp as a few droplets of water ran down her cheek.
Not too long ago, Will had gone through with Danny what to do if Emma had had a panic attack when he wasn't around. The amount of panic attacks had decreased significantly since Danny's birth but when Nathan was born, the stress of everything made them come back every so often.
His father's rules were mostly simple: keep her calm, comfortable and cool. There were sometimes she did not like to be touched during an attack and if she were to react negatively to touch, Will instructed him to give her space. Otherwise, rub her back gently.
So that is what Danny did. He put the towel under her head to keep her comfortable, used the wet hand towel to keep her cool and the rubbing on her back seemed to be calming her down, if slowly.
He heard the sounds of quiet whimpering behind him and looked over his shoulder to see his twin brothers, Benji and Emmett pressed against each other, with matching concerned expressions.
They were just four years old and couldn't understand what was happening. He knew his mother would be fine in just a few hours but they didn't.
"Benji, you know how to put in a movie, right?"
Benji sniffled, wiping his nose on his wrist before nodding.
"Okay, why don't you go put on The Minions so you can watch with Emmett and Nate."
Benji pouted looking down to his mother. "But Mommy..."
"Mommy is okay, Benji." He assured him with a smile. "She just needs to be alone and she needs it to be quiet. Can you be quiet?"
Benji looked at Emmett and Emmett looked back at him as if deciding with each other if they could do what was asked.
Then they turned back in unison and nodded to their older brother.
"Good." Danny smiled at them. "Go ahead then."
Benji and Emmett stole one more glance at their mother and then ran out of the room, Emmett on Benji's heels, loudly reminding him that they needed to be quiet.
Emma was calmed now - her body still and quiet as she laid there with her eyes closed, listening to her sons interact.
She felt her body relax even more as soon as the twins left the room and she was just left with Danny's comforting presence beside her.
Danny remained quiet, remembering what his Dad had told him. It would only upset his mother more if he tried to talk to her and he had to wait for her to say something first.
He kept his hand resting softly on her back, rubbing in small circles and just waited.
It was another minute before the haze of panic cleared her mind. She had been breathing deeply and evenly, letting her son's touch comfort her and the coolness of the damp towel calm her.
She inhaled deeply, held it for a few seconds and then released it slowly before finally opening her eyes.
She stared at the wall for a few long moments and then slowly pushed herself up.
Danny kept his hand on her as he watched her carefully.
She let out a small sigh as she rested her back against the cabinet. She looked up as a small hand hesitantly covered her own and met the concerned gaze of her son.
She swallowed thickly, guilt swarming inside of her as she took in his expression. She knew Will had gone over with him what to do if she ever had a panic attack around them and he wasn't around, but she had hoped he never would have to use that knowledge.
"Oh Danny..." She whispered and reached her hand, still a little shaky, to touch the side of his face.
He leaned into her touch. "Are you alright, Mom?"
She forced a small smile. "I'm okay." She said softly, though she wasn't sure if that was true. The reason for her panic attack was once again nudging at her mind but she tried to push back the feeling of overwhelming panic that accompanied it.
"I'm so sorry you had to see that, baby." She whispered, rubbing her thumb against his cheek softly.
"It's okay." He replied just as softly. He had handled the situation perfectly but he was only eight years old and she could see it had shaken him up a little bit.
"Come here." She dropped her hand and opened her arms and he eyed her cautiously for a moment and then crawled into her arms. She leaned forward and wrapped her arms around him, hugging him close to her.
She ran her fingers through his curly hair and pressed a kiss to the side of his head. "You're a good boy, Danny. I love you."
"I love you too, Mom." He replied, his voice muffled by his mouth being buried in her shoulder.
Her throat tightened and she let out a slow shuddering breath, hugging him tighter for another minute.
It was then that she realized that she was on the bathroom floor and while she always made sure it was meticulously cleaned, it still caused a chill to go up her spine.
She patted Danny on the back and released her hold on him. Danny crawled back out of the hug and Emma immediately rose to her feet, brushing off her clothes.
Her legs shook slightly as she caught sight of the pregnancy tests still lying on the counter top. She let out a quick breath and quickly snatched them up in her hand and tossed them into the garbage.
Danny pressed his little brow together, looking past her to the trash can and then up to her curiously.
Her eyes were closed again as she took another few deep breaths and then looked back down at her son. She gave him a small, reassuring smile, shaking her head.
"Don't worry about it, Danny."
He cocked his head but could see the tension in her body and didn't question it further.
"Now," She started calmly, softly, "Why don't you go join your brothers?"
He hesitated, crinkling his brow and she smiled at him, caressing his cheek once more. "I'm fine, Danny. I promise."
He bit his lip softly but then nodded and slowly walked out of the room, pausing once more in the doorway to look back at her and with a final, reassuring nod from her, disappeared into the hallway.
She let out a slow breath as soon as he was gone and she turned around to face the sink. She took the hand towel that was crumpled in her palm and ran it under the water to get it wet again.
She twisted the excess water out and then placed it over her face and tilted her head to keep it there for a few long seconds.
She grimaced when she swallowed again and still had that bitter taste on her tongue and quickly dropped the towel and grabbed her toothbrush to brush her teeth.
She brushed until her gums bled and then washed all traces of vomit and blood out of her mouth.
She gripped the side of the sink tightly as she looked herself in the mirror.
Her face was red, damp strands of hair stuck to the sides of her face, and her eyes were red from crying.
Without looking, she quickly lowered down the toilet seat and then flushed the toilet before sitting on the closed toilet seat.
She leaned forward and buried her head in her hands. Her panic attack was over but anxious thoughts still raced through her mind.
Oh what was she going to do?
School had let out a few days ago for the kids but as principal Will still had to do a few last things before his school year ended. He always went in for half a day so he could spend the rest of the day with Emma and the kids.
Danny and even the twins who had just finished pre-school were at school all day so Emma was just left with taking care of baby Nate, which she could more than handle.
However, once school let out, taking care of four boys was a little more daunting for her so Will promised her he'd be home for the afternoons to help even if that meant working into early July.
So at just a little past one o'clock Will walked in through the door, calling out a greeting to whoever was around.
He heard a resounding echo of "Daddy!" from the living room and chuckled to himself as the background noise of the Minion movie reached his ears a few seconds later.
He placed his satchel in the hall closet and then walked the few paces into the living room, smiling at the sight of his four sons all cuddled up on the couch together.
His eyes flickered briefly to the television and then wandered around the room and his smile slowly faded as he caught sight of the mess.
Toys were strewn everywhere, which really wasn't that unusual despite Emma's many attempts at keeping it organized, but the boys were covered in paper plates and peanut butter.
Peanut Butter and Jelly was a favorite lunch choice of the boys and it usually did get the younger ones messy but Emma would never let them leave the kitchen in the state they were in.
She wouldn't let them eat in the living room, period. So their state was just a little alarming to him.
"Hi Daddy!" Benji waved to him happily once he saw him and Emmett mirrored his twin a second later.
Will offered them a weak smile. "Hello boys." He greeted. "What's going on here?" He directed the question and his attention to his eldest, sitting on the side closest to him, eyeing him with a look of concern.
"We're watching the Minions!" Emmett answered happily.
"For the third time." Danny added in annoyance.
"Where's your mother?" Will asked a little quieter as he walked up to stand beside Danny, looking down at him inquisitively.
Danny's frown deepened and he leaned in closer to his father. "She's upstairs in bed." He said and Will's brow shot up.
"Is she alright?" He asked, his concern for his wife rising.
Danny shrugged once. "She had a panic attack earlier in the morning." He explained and Will's eyes widened.
"What? Why didn't you call me Danny?"
"She told me not to!" He replied. "She said she just needed to rest for a bit."
Will knew exactly how bad Emma's panic attacks could get and he hated the thought of the kids being exposed to their mother in that condition, being powerless to help her.
"What happened?" Will asked a little more calmly but his worry evident in his voice.
"She threw up I think..." Danny answered and Will grimaced, knowing how much his wife hated that in particular. "I don't know, Benji found her and called for me. She was crying on the floor but I did what you told me to, Dad and then she stopped."
Will's brow twitched as he reached out to touch his son's shoulder gently. "Are you okay?" He asked softly. It was always hard for him to see Emma that way he couldn't imagine what an eight year old must be feeling about seeing his mother that way.
To his surprise, Danny offered up a small, half smile and nodded his head. "Yeah, Dad I'm okay. I knew I had to help Mom so I did."
Will felt a swell of pride at the bravery of his son and he moved his hand from his shoulder to his head, running his fingers gently through his red curls. "Thank you, Danny."
Danny smiled again and Will smiled back for a second before he sighed and looked over his shoulder to the hallway.
Then he dropped his hand and addressed Danny, "I'm going to check on her, okay?"
Danny nodded. "Okay."
Will patted his shoulder gently once more before he turned and left the room, heading towards their bedroom.
It had been a little while since Emma had one of her panic attacks so he wondered what triggered it. Danny said she was sick but was that a result of the attack or was the attack triggered by her sickness?
The last time Emma had the stomach virus he could barely get her to calm down - she was in tears during the whole 24 hour duration of the virus and he had to take the day off to take care of the boys. Thankfully it was before Nate but the twins were still young and dealing with crying toddlers plus his sick, miserable wife made that day not a very pleasant one.
He truly did hope that it was not another stomach virus.
He knocked on the door quietly before opening the door slowly. "Em?" He peered into the dimly lit room and found his wife curled up on the bed, her back facing him.
"Emma?" He called again a little louder as he walked into the room. He slipped onto the opposite side of the bed, reaching out to gently touch her arm.
"Honey, are you awake?"
She flinched slightly at his touch, curling up further into herself and he frowned deeply in concern. There were only a few times when Emma shied away from his touch.
"What's the matter, Emma?" He asked softly. "Danny said you were sick?"
"Will..." She muttered, her voice low and calm, not moving from her position. "I need to ask you something." She continued and he squeezed her arm gently in acknowledgement. "And I need you to answer it honestly."
His brow twitched. "Of course, Emma." If she wasn't sick he might have been offended by that request. They were married for nearly ten years, surely she knew he wouldn't lie to her?
He watched her intently and her jaw tightened slightly before she asked, "Did you ever get the vasectomy?"
Suddenly his breath caught in his chest, his eyes widening slowly as a chill ran up his spine.
Emma finally rolled around onto her back at his silence and fixed a hard stare on him, her eyes rimmed red from crying. "Did you?" She asked again in a whisper.
He closed his eyes momentarily and let out a sigh, pressing his lips together as he shook his head. "No. No...I didn't."
A soft whimper passed her lips and his eyes popped open to look at her. She had now averted her gaze, her hand covering her mouth as she shook her head slowly back and forth.
"I made the appointment, Emma." He said quickly, trying to reassure her. "I did and then I got so busy that I had to reschedule and then it just kept happening that I couldn't make the appointment so I cancelled it and vowed to make it once things calmed down at work when I knew I could actually make an appointment."
"But you never did." Emma said, lowering her hand from her mouth and her voice was so devoid of emotion it almost scared him.
He sighed again. "No...I forgot all about it, Em...I'm sorry."
Her eyes slowly moved to meet his and her bottom lip started to tremble. Tears prickled at her eyes but behind the tears was something even more terrifying: Anger.
"How could you do that?" She whispered, her voice shaking.
He swallowed thickly and hesitantly reached out to take her hands in his. As soon as his fingers brushed across hers however, a spark lit and she flew off the bed, backing away from him like a terrified, angry animal.
His eyes widened at her reaction and he lowered his hands to his lap, inching across the bed towards her slowly. "Emma I'm sorry." He said again. "I just let it slip my mind but I promise I'll make the appointment and do it, no matter what. I can go do it right now -" He motioned over his shoulder.
Her eyes flashed angrily, her hands curling into fists at her sides. "Well it's a bit too late now, Will!" She cried, her voice reaching the top of its range.
He eyed her warily, extending his hands out in front of him, shaking his head in confusion. "What do you mean, Emma?"
She let out a choked sob, her hand covering her mouth momentarily to suppress it and two tears rolled simultaneously down both of her cheeks.
She let out a breath, her jaw trembling. "You knew. You knew you didn't get it and you didn't even tell me. You didn't tell me and you knew and still you let us have unprotected sex."
His brow furrowed for a moment, cocking his head and then his eyes slowly widened as a realization swept over him. His breath caught and his stomach twisted as he suddenly knew why Emma was so upset. "Oh God..." He whispered. "Emma...are you..."
She took a few quick, deep breaths and then nodded, steadying her voice. "Yes. Yes, Will, I'm pregnant."
He let out a breath, closing his eyes as the truth hit him like a ton of bricks. He didn't know what part of his brain, probably the side overcome with shock, provoked him to ask her, "Are you sure?"
"Am I sure?" She repeated in a whisper and he could hear the thunder behind her voice and he cracked his eyes open, already regretting asking that question.
"I've missed my last period, I've been feeling sick all week and there are six positive pregnancy tests in the bathroom trash that say yes, I'm pretty sure, Will!" Her voice started out low but by the end she was full on screaming at him and he winced at the high caliber of her voice, briefly hoping that the kids didn't hear her.
"Okay, okay." He said quickly, holding his hands out again before he crawled across the bed.
Another sob escaped her lips as she once again covered her mouth, her eyes closing as a few more tears rolled down her cheeks.
Will's heart was pounding in his chest as he rose from the bed and slowly made his way over to her. Shock was the most prominent emotion he felt, and he didn't even know how to process the information yet, all he knew was that his wife was in distress, it was his fault, and he needed to fix it.
"Emma..." He whispered and he reached out towards her.
"Don't!" She snapped, taking another step back as his fingers brushed across her arm and he pausing, dropping his hands to his sides.
She glared at him through her tears but soon sobs overtook her entire body.
He swallowed thickly, his heart breaking at the sight of her, knowing he had done this to her. He did have every intention of getting the procedure but as his life was a constant swarm of work plus four boys - he had no time and soon it had been forgotten.
"Oh Will..." She choked out a few seconds later. The anger was gone and what was left was despair.
He tried again to reach out to her and when she didn't flinch away at his touch he immediately brought her into his arms, pressing her against his chest.
She grabbed onto his shirt tightly and cried openly into his chest and he felt tears tug at his own eyes as he held onto her tightly, burying his face in her hair.
"What are we going to do?" She sobbed, her voice muffled by his chest.
He let out a slow breath, tightening his arms again, and rubbing one hand slowly up and down her back, trying to ease her quivering form.
"We'll work it out, Emma." He told her softly yet confidently. "We always do. Nate was a surprise." He reminded her.
Emma sniffled a few times and then pulled out of his arms and his heart broke at the sight of her tear stained, red cheeks, and panic in her wide, brown eyes.
"Yes, he was and we agreed that we never wanted that to happen again." She countered, a bit of an edge in her voice. "He barely survived his birth, Will." Her voice cracked and her eyes welled up again.
Will felt his own throat growing tight at the memory. Emma had been in labor for hours with slow progression, which had never happened with the other two pregnancies, and suddenly Nathan's heart rate dropped to a dangerous rate. They had to do an Emergency C-Section to get him out safely and they barely got a chance to see him before they rushed him to the NICU. He was there for almost two weeks, and Emma, because of the stress of the whole situation, had a severe panic attack that left her in the hospital just as long as Nathan was.
That had gone down as the worst two weeks of Will's life. He felt completely helpless with his newborn stuck in an incubator barely able to breathe on his own and his wife, recovering from invasive surgery and a panic attack.
That was the main reason why they had decided not to have anymore children - they both knew neither of them could be put through that again.
Which is why Will was absolutely kicking himself for not getting the procedure when he said he would. Emma was pregnant again and after Nate, they both knew the risks that lay ahead of them.
Emma let out a shuddering breath, covering her mouth for a second before speaking again. "I'm in my 40's now, Will...do you know how dangerous that can be? What if my body can't handle this?"
She shook her head frantically, her hands starting to flail wildly around her as she worked herself up into a panic. "What if we can't handle another baby? Nate is still so young and the twins...oh gosh, Will, we can't afford another baby."
Will noticed his wife shaking, her knees bending just slightly and his eyes widened and he reached out to catch her as she slowly slunk to the ground.
They both sat on the ground, Will wrapping up Emma in his arms tightly, holding her as she shook.
He continued to murmur generic words of comfort against her ear as he rubbed her back comfortingly.
Eventually they both fell into silence, using the other's body as a simple comfort, both of them drifting off into their own world of thought, worrying and pondering about the future.
After a long few minutes, Emma had gone so still Will had almost thought she fell asleep.
"Emma?" He whispered.
She hummed quietly in response and tightened her grip on his shirt.
He hesitated, going silent for a long moment as he thought of what to say.
"Whatever needs to be done...we'll do it to make this work."
She let out a long, shuddering breath. "Five children, Will." Her voice was dead, the shock of the situation taking its toll on her. "We'll have five. How..." She breathed out and then paused and he waited, knowing she wasn't done talking and needed to collect herself. "...can we..." She continued slowly. "...do this...five..."
"I know it is a lot and...you're right it won't be easy. And I cannot apologize enough for letting this happen to you." He swallowed thickly and his jaw trembled slightly as a sudden thought occurred to him.
"Emma." He whispered. "If you don't want this...if you can't...you can always...I mean, have you considered..." He couldn't get the word out but he knew he had to lay it on the table as option for her.
Emma seemed to catch on after a minute and she pulled away from him, her eyes widening in horror. "No." Her voice shook but there was nothing but certainty behind the word and her eyes welled up with tears. "No, Will I couldn't...I could never..."
Her hand shook as she moved it down to rest over her flat abdomen and she shook her head. "It's still our baby." Her lips trembled and a few more tears rolled down her cheeks. "I'm just so scared, Will."
He immediately pulled her back into his arms, holding her tightly, closing his eyes as he buried his face in her hair and she cried into his chest.
"I know, Emma. So am I."
Will made the appointment to get the vasectomy as soon as he could. He had Emma stay in the room with him as he made the appointment and then a week later she drove him to get the procedure.
His soreness was proof enough that it had actually happened. It had been a rough few days, getting over the shock of the situation and then going to Emma's first prenatal check up.
Having been through three pregnancies already, she just nodded along blankly to the doctor's instructions, trying to keep her emotions in check.
She finally managed a little bit of a smile when they viewed the ultrasound but the reality of the situation sunk in quickly after and she burst into tears.
Her hormones, combined with morning sickness and taking care of four children made her already natural anxious attitude increase tenfold.
The morning sickness thankfully stopped only after a couple weeks but Will had managed to rework his work schedule for the rest of the summer in order to help Emma as much as he could.
Tensions ran high among them for months in what was no doubt the most stressful of Emma's pregnancies.
Nathan had been a surprise also and that pregnancy came with a little more anxiety than the rest. The twins pregnancy came of a shock because even though they had both agreed that it was time to have another baby, they were not expecting twins. When Emma first received the news she didn't move for about ten solid minutes until Will was able to coax her out of it and reassure her everything would be alright.
This pregnancy was worse than both of those combined. While they both loved the unborn child and wouldn't consider it unwanted, it came to be out of a false sense of security that Will had given her.
She said she forgave him but she was constantly filled with such despair and anxiety that guilt churned his stomach every day.
He hoped and prayed that once the baby was born, things would change. That having the physical being and not just an invisible being growing inside her would change Emma's attitude.
It wasn't until Emma's 20 week check up that things finally started turning around for the better.
It had started off as a stressful morning.
It was late September and Benji and Emmett had given them trouble about going to school and even Nate was being fussy.
Will could sense Emma was almost at the end of her nerves, and was this close to a breakdown, so he quickly took over the situation, convincing her to take a step away and relax.
He managed to get all the kids to school and dropped Nate off at daycare for the morning.
He also took the morning off to accompany Emma to her appointment. He tried to make every one of them because he made a vow that he wouldn't make her feel alone in any of these long nine months.
Emma was quiet but a little more calm than she had been earlier in the day as they headed towards the doctor's office.
Will was smart enough not to try and talk to her, not if he wanted his head to stay attached.
When they got to the doctor's office and sat in the waiting area, Emma's anxiety and tension levels skyrocketed. Despite her strong progress over the last ten years she still reacted badly to being in certain places she considered dirty. Doctor's offices were one of those places.
He dared to take her hand and when she looked over at him, eyes wide and brimming with unshed tears, he just gave her a small, reassuring smile.
Her lips twitched up for a moment and she visibly relaxed a little, leaning into him.
He mentally sighed in relief. He was glad he was still able to have that calming effect on her.
Emma was called in first to have the internal exam and then fifteen minutes later Will was able to join her.
It was an experience they had a few dozen times, but Will still felt that thrill of joy every time the Doctor waved the wand over Emma's swollen belly, showing them their child.
"Everything looks good." Dr. Hawthorne said with a smile. Dr. Hawthorne had been Emma's OB-GYN for all of Emma's pregnancies since Danny. Emma had a level of trust in the young woman that Will had rarely seen her have in another person that wasn't himself. He knew having her at least made this pregnancy just a little less stressful than it might have been had there been another doctor.
"Would you like to find out what you're having?"
"Yes!" Both parents said simultaneously. Danny had been the only one they waited until the birth for. Once they found out they were having twins, Emma knew she needed to be as prepared as possible for their arrival. And once she had the experience and comfort of knowing in advance they had found out for Nate too. So it wasn't even a question that they would find out.
"Okay." Dr. Hawthorne laughed at their enthusiasm and turned back to the screen. She wiggled the wand around a little more on Emma's belly until she found the right spot.
Both Emma and Will held their breath, eyes flickering anxiously between the doctor and the screen.
Dr. Hawthorne hit a button on the keyboard, pausing the image and then turned her full attention and bright smile to the expectant parents.
"Congratulations...it's a girl."
The couple stared in momentary shock at the doctor.
Emma was the first one to break the silence with a small squeak. "A girl?" Her voice was barely above a whisper and Will glanced over at her to find her eyes round and glistening with tears. "Are - are you sure?"
"I'm positive." Dr. Hawthorne confirmed with a small laugh.
Emma gasped, never taking her eyes off the screen as she groped blindly for Will's hand.
Will caught her movements and immediately caught her hand in his, squeezing gently as tears filled his own eyes. "Will…" She whispered.
Will brought her her hand to his lips, brushing a kiss over her knuckles as he let out a happy, relieved sob. "I know, Em…"
Emma finally blinked, a few tears rolling down her cheeks as turned to look at him. "It's a girl, Will."
Then a smile like he had not seen on her in months broke across her face and he couldn't help but echo it.
"I'll give you two a few minutes." Dr. Hawthorne said, sensing the couple needed a private moment.
They barely registered her as she got up and left the room.
Will swooped in and pressed his lips to hers in a loving kiss. Emma broke it not seconds later with her giggling laughter.
Will brought his free hand to her cheek and wiped away her tears with his thumb.
They pressed their foreheads together for a few blissful silent moments and then simultaneously looked back to the monitor where the image of their baby girl was still frozen.
"I can't believe it." Emma whispered in awe.
They loved their boys beyond all rhyme and reason but when the twins came along and they had to deal with three little boys, despite Danny's relatively good behavior, it added to their stress levels. Then Nate was just another level. Another level of love, certainly but four boys was quite the undertaking. After Danny they wanted a girl but fate had other plans.
Until now, that is.
"Me neither." Will whispered. "We finally got our little girl."
Emma swallowed thickly, smiling.
"Will." She murmured and he sniffled once before turning towards her.
"Hmmm?"
"I...I'm sorry."
His brow furrowed. "What on Earth for Emma?"
She bit her lip. "For how I've been acting during this pregnancy."
"Hey," he immediately cut her off, squeezing her hand and looking directly into her eyes, "Emma, you have nothing to apologize for. It was a surprise and...it was my fault."
She shook her head. "It's not anyone's fault, Will." She whispered with a small smile. "It's a baby, it's our baby and maybe we weren't ready for it...for her..." She corrected and a smile blossomed across both their faces. "But...we've always wanted a girl. And I..well, I had accepted after Nate we weren't going to have one but maybe...this was supposed to happen." She turned her eyes back to the screen. "I...I would have loved it even if it was another boy but it's a girl...she's our girl and I…" Her bottom lip trembled and a few more tears rolled down her cheeks. "I'm so happy." She finished in a choked whisper and Will immediately leaned in, pressing a tender kiss to the side of her head.
He let a tear escape as he rested his head against her shoulder, staring at the monitor. "So am I…"
Emma let out a few shaky breaths before turning to him, eyes shining with tears and joy. "I love you, Will Schuester."
He grinned back at her. "And I love you, Emma Schuester."
He released her hand and moved it down to the swell of her belly, ignoring the sticky jelly that smeared his hands. "And we love you too baby girl Schuester."
Emma let out a small sobbing laugh. "We do." She sniffled. "We love you so much."
They turned to each other and shared in another loving kiss. They both knew that even though there were surely to be troubled times ahead, that they would be alright.
A/N: Part two will be up either tomorrow or the day after so stay tuned!