Vitamins
A small boy of six grumbled as his mother looked him over one more time, brushing some non-existent lint off his shoulders. His light blue shirt was ironed and tucked neatly into his pants, and a dark brown belt somehow found itself around his waist. What formerly was messy shoulder-length black hair became an orderly tiny ponytail tied back neatly with a black ribbon, bringing out his sharp chin and fathomless grey eyes. His face was clean and shining, and he could most definitely see his reflection in his new black shoes.
"Mum," he pouted, "I don't-"
"You shall address me as 'Mother,' Sirius Orion Bartholomew Thomas Frey Black. I will not tolerate such informality with you, especially while we are here. Remember, this is an important political connection that lies solely in your hands. I'm sure you are aware of what will happen if you fail?"
The blonde haired woman elegantly arched an eyebrow, causing Sirius to take a step back.
"O-of course, Mu-Mother."
"Don't stutter like that! It shows that you have no class. Do behave yourself, yes? Evelyn Potter has very graciously invited us over today. Says that her son is in need of a playmate and that she would like to speak with me about some things. Ha! Naturally, she came to us, since you are, after all, the same age as her son. Now, do you remember what I told you before?"
Sirius sighed, earning him yet another raised eyebrow. "Yes, Mother. Behave. Don't play pranks, don't talk like I'm some mudblood, befriend the brat so Father has connections, don't muss up my hair and make a bad impression, blah blah blah..."
His mother slapped his arm. "Enough. You are to show me respect! Now, let's go. Ivy Greens should be just down this walkway...yes. There it is. Come now, ring the doorbell."
The six-year-old stood up on his tip-toes and pulled the string that hung down from a brass bell. A few moments later, the doors to the great mansion were opened, and in the doorway stood a stoic man, obviously late in his years, dressed in a black tuxedo and carrying what looked like a white dishcloth on his arm.
"Mrs. Edward Black and Mr. Sirius Black, I presume?" he stated stiffly.
"Yes. Do inform the madame of this house that we have arrived."
"Of course. This way, please."
He led them down a spacious corridor, full of sunlight. Pots of ivy were everywhere, delicately decorating the furniture and walls. Sirius's eyes grew wide as he saw all the plants; they never had plants in their house. Whenever he brought some in, his mother would start berating him and sending him back outside to dispose of them. He had always thought that it was taboo to have any sort of living thing except humans in the house; that's what his mother told him, anyway.
They stopped in a large, spacious room, full of wicker chairs and sofas that had light blue cushions on them. Again, pots of ivy littered the room, some in woven baskets and others twined around the legs and arms of the chair. Sunlight bathed the room, and books laid on the oakwood coffee tables haphazardly, as if the person reading them had suddenly stopped and decided to move on to another book with the intention of returning later to finish.
His grey eyes finally fell on an elderly lady, who was standing up to greet them. He didn't pay attention as his mother introduced him and made some small talk; he was too engrossed in taking in her appearance.
He had never seen anyone like her before! She had grey hair that was already streaked with white, clear blue eyes, and a very kind face. A long white-sleeve cotton t-shirt matched themselves with a simple light blue flower-print long skirt. She stood barefoot on the wooden floor as she spoke with his mother; he had never seen someone so informal before! At home, he never dared wander around barefoot-he tried once, and that ended with his rear end not being very happy with him. He never tried it again.
"Sirius? Sirius!"
He snapped his eyes back to his mother.
"Yes, Mother?"
"Oh, how polite!" cried the woman happily, "You have raised him very well, Madeline."
"Thank you, Evelyn. Sirius, this is Mrs. Potter, James's mother. Do say hello."
"Hello, Madam," he said charmingly, surreptitiously taking her hand and kissing it. Mrs. Potter laughed delightedly and patted him on his head.
"Run along, dear. James is in the kitchen eating his breakfast. Have you eaten yet?" she asked with concern.
"Yes, Ma'am."
"Oh please, call me Evelyn, or at least Mrs. Potter."
"Will do, Mrs. P!"
Before his mother could say anything about his abbreviation, he shot out of the room and turned left, praying that it would take him to the kitchen. A few minutes later, he came upon a room full of pots and pans. In the back was a round table big enough for four people in front of a bay window. A head of messy black hair caught Sirius's eye, and he observed him critically.
His hair was messed up and he looked like he had just woken up. Hazel eyes glared at the breakfast that was set in front of him, and his head was propped on his left hand while his right hand absently played with the fork.
Suddenly, he looked straight at Sirius.
"Wha' you lookin' at?" he demanded, putting down his fork and getting out of the chair.
"Nothing."
"Right, and I'm the world's greatest chaser."
"Really? That's wicked! Can I have your auto-auto..."
"Autograph?"
"Yeah, that's it!"
The strange boy eyed him critically before sticking out his hand.
"James Potter, mate. Please to meet 'ya."
"Erm...Sirius Black."
The two shook hands briefly. Sirius's thought that James was a spoiled brat began to dissipate slowly.
"What's with yer clothes?" James asked, while sitting back down in his chair. Sirius sat across from him, scowling.
"My mum decided that I had to look 'decent' to see the Potter family. If I had known you were in sleeping clothes, I woulda worn mine too!"
"Well, mine are better than yours anyway."
"Is not!"
"Is too!"
"Is not!"
"Is too!"
"Is too!"
"Is not!"
"Haha. Got 'ya."
"Hey, no fair. That was dirty!"
Sirius grinned smugly while James slouched back in his chair, upset that he had lost an argument.
"Say, you gonna eat that?"
"Hmm? Oh this? Here, you can have it."
"Really? Thanks!"
James pushed the food across the table and watched Sirius wolf it down.
"No, wait!" he cried, as Sirius was half way through.
"Wha-?"
"Stop! You can't eat that! That would make it look like I actually ate it, and that would mean...would mean..."
"Would mean what?" asked Sirius, face full of crumbs from the toast he had just eaten.
"That would mean that I would have to take my..."
Sirius leaned in closer. "Your..."
"My..." James leaned in as well.
"Your..."
"My..."
"Your..."
"My..."
Their heads were practically touching now.
"Your..."
"My...VITAMINS."
He said the last word in a whisper, and the two of them knocked heads as Sirius pulled up.
"OW!"
James clutched his forehead and leaned back against the chair, while Sirius laid his on the cold table.
"All that suspense for one word!" cried Sirius, who began to bang his head against the table. "Why do I always fall for the stupidest things!"
James smirked, taking his hand away from his forehead. "Cuz you're stupid, duh. Only stupid people band their heads 'gainst tables."
Sirius stopped suddenly, and a grin lit up his face.
"Hey...you don't want to take your vitamins, do you?"
"Course not, are you mad?"
"When does the rubbish-get-ridder come?"
"Huh?"
"You know! The guys who always come in dressed in green and haul out all the rubbish?"
"Dunno. Lemme ask Mum."
James dashed down the way Sirius had just come from while Sirius himself finished James's breakfast. "Yum," he thought, "Eggs. Bacon. Toast. Toasty toasty toast toast...lalala...I'm in heaven."
The messy-haired boy returned a few moments later. "Mum said he was 'sposed to come in an hour or so."
"Good. Wanna know how you'll never have to take vitamins again?"
"How?"
"Easy. Stick it in the rubbish bin, duh."
"But how do we get them down?"
"Huh?"
James pointed to a very high cabinet shelf that stood above the sink. "It's all the way up there..."
"Hmmmm...I know! Maybe we can climb on each other's backs! Then we'll be tall enough!"
"Good idea! I'll go on top!"
"No, I will!"
"No, me!"
"Me!"
"Me!"
"You'll mess up my clothes!"
"You weight more than me!"
"Eh...probably do. Okay. You go on top. Ready?"
James nodded and Sirius squatted. Quickly, the messy-haired boy climbed onto his newfound playmate's back. Sirius slowly stood up. Unfortunately, they discovered that they only reached half-way.
"Man, we're short."
"No, really?"
James hopped down and sat on the tiled floor, thinking. Sirius joined him moments later. After thinking for a while, James suddenly perked up.
"I know! We can take one of those rolly kitchen chairs and climb on it! Then we can get them!"
"Okay!"
The two of them dragged over the chair James was sitting in when they first met, and this time Sirius climbed onto it.
"Hey! Almost there! I need a couple more inches though..."
He tried reaching again, but missed.
"Hmmm..."
Unexpectedly, James ran out of the room and came back with a pair of three inch high-heeled shoes.
"WHAT! ARE YOU TRYING TO MAKE ME DO WHAT I THINK YOU'RE TRYING TO MAKE ME DO!"
James grinned and shrugged. "Mum always said that they made her taller. Maybe they're magic or something."
"You put them on."
"But you're already on the chair!"
"But only GIRLS wear them."
Both boys pulled faces of disgust while giving themselves cootie shots.
"Well, think of the thought of no more vitamins."
"But what's in it for me?"
"You ate my breakfast!"
"Oh...yeah...do you want it back?"
"That's sick-making, Sirius. No, I don't want your throw-up."
"Suit yourself."
James passed him the shoes, and he grudgingly put them on. It was just enough-his small hands closed around the bottle of vitamins.
"Think fast!"
James didn't know what hit him. One second, he was standing up silently laughing at Sirius who was wearing his mum's shoes, and the next, he was on the floor with a jar full of vitamins in his lap.
"Yes!" cried Sirius. "Mission get-vitamins-off-shelf has been completed! Auror James, will you do the honors?"
James shook his head to stop seeing stars.
"Sure!"
The two marched to the rubbish bin and after saying a few words for its eulogy, they ceremoniously dumped it into the bin.
"And now, we wait," said Sirius, grinning happily.
"Hey, Dad got me a new toy broom. Wanna see it?"
Sirius nodded enthusiastically, and the two took off for the broom shed.
xxx
An hour later, Evelyn Potter went into the kitchen as Madeline Black excused herself to the restroom. Seeing the empty plate on the table, she walked toward the shelf above the sink where she kept her beloved son's vitamins. She failed to notice two sets of curious eyes peeking in through the bay window, holding their breaths.
They watched as she wrinkled her brow. "Now where could I have put those?" she wondered out loud.
Suddenly, a man's head appeared through the kitchen's fireplace.
"G'mornin, Ma'am. Do you have any rubbish today?"
"Yes, it's by the door."
The man emerged from the fireplace a few moments later, picking up the trash and hauling it back into the fireplace. With a tip of his hat, the man bid Mrs. Potter goodbye and left, leaving a trail of dying green flames.
"Now where..."
She quickly stopped. Her son's odd question of when the rubbish man came suddenly came rushing back to her. Easily putting two and two together, she stomped out of the room.
"JAMES HARRISON POTTER, WAIT UNTIL I GET MY HANDS ON YOU!"
A/N: ...giggles... I just couldn't get this idea out of my head! This is actually based on a true story (I was a bad kid...so sorry!) and my brother and I decided to get rid of our vitamins. Teehee! Do tell me what you think!