Ok so i'm newly converted to skins and i was watching season 1 episode 6 (the one in Russia) and i felt inspired to write a little fic about Maxxie and dealing with everything. This is probably going to be 2 or 3 chapters long (only if i get reviews though!!)

Here's chapter one...

Sighing deeply Maxxie looked in the mirror, it had been almost a week since the trip to Russia and everything was messed up. He shut his eyes as he relived the moment he and Tony...he couldn't even think about it. He didn't even know why he let it happen it just did. He felt dirty, like no amount of showers would cleanse him. It made him feel sick, he was a slut.

He needed to about the house in 10minutes to go to college. Truthfully it was the last thing he felt like doing but he couldn't afford to skip the day so he would just have to put up with the dirty looks from Michelle and Anwar ignoring him. Just the thought of that made Maxxie wince. It hurt him everyday, to see Anwar talking to everyone having a laugh like they used to do.

He had never saw his sexuality as a problem before. Some people liked girls, other's liked girls and, in Tony's case for example, they liked both. He couldn't work out Anwar's problem. Was it really his religion? Or was it he just disapproved and hid behind religion as an excuse? Did other people have a problem with it and masked it? Maxxie shook his head to try and clear all the questions building up in his head. This made him feel dizzy and light-headed. A mixture of little sleep and food. Over the past week he hadn't really ate, it was like food had no taste, it just made him feel nauseous so he had stopped eating properly, not a great idea seeing as how he seemed to be dancing more than usual. Dancing is what helped him get through the day at the moment. It was his release.

Taking a deep breath he looked in the mirror. He looked awful, dark circles underneath his eyes from lying awake at night wondering how everything went so wrong and what to do about it. His face looked gaunt and pale, a mixture of weight loss and not really going out. It was too strange for him so he usually went straight home or dancing. He looked at the clock and realised if he didn't get going soon he was going to be late so shouting a quick goodbye to his parents he left the house.

As it turns out he was late anyway, cringing as he saw the time while locking his bike to the railings outside the main building. He ran into the history classroom,

"Sorry I'm late." He said breathlessly while sitting down in his table, ignoring the staring at his less than brilliant look at the moment.

Michelle watched him from the back of the classroom, thinking of how terrible Maxxie looked. It was like he hadn't slept in a while and he had gotten incredibly skinny. His jeans hung off him in a way that seemed unatural.Suddenly she felt slightly guilty, obviously he had been taking the whole Russia thing harder than she had realised.

Anwar also watched him from his seat. He also felt a twinge of guilt as he watched his former best friend sit down, he didn't look very happy. In fact Anwar was sure he hadn't seen Maxxie smile since the trip, since before the argument in their room about his sexuality. Anwar knew he had hurt him, but it was his religion, he had to follow it.

"Big night was it?"Whispered Chris leaning across the desk.

Maxxie rolled his eyes, trust Chris to think that he had been partying, it seemed to be all he really thought about.

"Something like that." Maxxie mumbled, thinking it was easier to let people think that then explain his feelings.

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They all had a short break before the next lesson psychology, the lesson Maxxie was dreading the most as he Tony would be there. Since his confession in class him and Tony hadn't spoken, despite them hanging around with the same people.

Maxxie, Sid, Chris and Kenneth sat on the grass, talking and making jokes. Maxxie wasn't really listening, his head was beginning to ache and he felt exhausted. He felt emotionally and physically drained about everything. He could feel hot tears pricking the back of his eyelids as he thought about how his best friend had labelled him sick and how much he had hurt Michelle, he needed to be alone. Abruptly he got up and walked over towards the back of the building where no-one would bother him.

Sid watched him leave, he was concerned normally Maxxie was full of life and tended to look at the good things in life, to see him so quiet un-nerved him. He went to stand up to follow him until he saw Michelle walk after him, so he sat back-down deciding to give them a minute alone.

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Maxxie walked quickly, brushing tears out of his eyes. He couldn't cry not here, not in public. Michelle was practically jogging to catch-up with him.

"Maxxie hold up!" She shouted, hoping he would stop.

He did stop and turned around, not quite believing he was hearing her voice.

"I'm sorry, ok? I'm sorry." She stated simply walking up to him and wrapping her arms around him.

"Everything is so messed up 'Chelle" Maxxie said, his voice muffled by her shoulder.

"I know, it's going to be ok." She said soothingly, rubbing his back as he began to break down.

"I'm sorry. You're right I am a whore. I don't know why I did it. I was hurt after everything with Anwar and I felt lonely. I hate myself for doing it but I did and I'm sorry." He said quietly.

"I know you are and it's ok. I know what Tony is like, it takes two to do it you know." She said. At least Maxxie was actually apologising sincerely, something Tony hadn't done. Sid had told her how Maxxie had stood up and admitted to everyone that it was his fault,she hated the idea that Tony had manipulated him into believing he was solely responsible. It was like it was all a game to Tony, he didn't care who got hurt as long as he won.

Maxxie just nodded. He pulled away from Michelle and took a deep breath, he was feeling a little dizzy.

"I am really sorry. Friends?" He asked her.

"Friends."Michelle smiled at him, a frown soon replaced it though, as she saw the state Maxxie was in. He looked even worse close up. He seemed too thin, he was always skinny but he looked ill. His face seemed to grow paler and she watched him sway.

"Max are you ok?" She asked him, placing a steadying hand on his arm.

"A little dizzy." He replied, closing his eyes trying to stop the spinning sensation.

The next thing she knew Maxxie was on the floor unconscious.

"SOMEONE HELP PLEASE!!" Michelle screamed at the top of her voice as she pulled her phone out of her jean pocket.

'C'mon Maxxie... please be ok... She thought to herself, tears building up in her eyes as she dialled 999.

What did you think?? I'm not updating until i get a few reviews so please let me know what you think!! Good or bad i don't mind!!