Title: The Beatles at Hogwarts
Author: SchizoAuthoress
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Um, disrespecting the songs of the greatest band on either side of the Atlantic? Yeah, I'm going to be haunted like nobody's business.
A/N: Thanks, Catriona Snape, for (unintentionally) giving me this idea. It's not *exactly* the same as yours, but if you don't like that I've done this, review it and tell me so. I will remove it then. Anything to do with the Beatles' families and/or love lives is totally made up for creative purposes.
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. The songs aren't mine either. Nor are the Beatles my possession. (Rest in Peace, John and George.)
"The Beatles at Hogwarts"
I'll never forget what happened at Hogwarts a week before Christmas holidays in my sixth year (Harry Potter's fifth). My name is Estrelleia Snape-Malcolm, but you can call me Stella Malcolm.
It was a normal (relatively speaking) day at Hogwarts. Neville had melted his seventh cauldron of the month that day, Crookshanks had landed on Ron's head in the library and gotten him kicked out, Ravenclaw flattened Hufflepuff in the Quidditch match, and Draco had tripped Harry on the way to supper in the Great Hall.
Oliver Wood had returned to scout new talent for the Appleby Arrows, and Percy Weasley was there on some kind of "Ministry business", but I strongly suspect that his mum told him to keep an eye on the younger Weasleys while she and Mr. Wealey went to Romania to visit Charlie.
But, right in the middle of the meal, the Fat Friar charged through the wall right above Dumbledore's head and shouted, "They're coming tonight!"
Immediately, all the ghosts began to chatter and preen in anticipation. Dumbledore looked slightly ruffled by this interruption. Smoothing out his beard, he asked the Friar, "Who is coming?"
"John Lennon and George Harrison!"
****
As well as Paul McCartney and Ringo Starr. Somehow, the ghosts of Hogwarts had arranged a Beatles reunion, post mortem of half the band. (If anybody complains about the fact that the Beatles are Muggles, I'll have you know that Ringo's second cousin has a half-sister whose daughter is the first witch in a long line of Muggles, and that George Harrison's grandfather was a wizard before falling victim to a Memory Charm. Besides that, Paul once dated Celestina Warbeck. And John comes to Hogwarts every so often, now that he's a ghost.)
Anyway, John and Paul argued for a little over what they were going to sing for us, but George decided to be a peacemaker and they stopped when he reasoned with them. Ringo suggested that they perform a "Special Hogwarts Edition" of some of their best songs.
****
"Thomas M. Riddle/Eleanor Rigby"
Ah, look at all the lonely people!
Ah, look at all the lonely people!
Thomas M. Riddle is a Dark Lord in the lurch
Still not as powerful as he has been
Lives with an Animagus
Waits at the window
Casts the Cruciatus curse, then casts it some more
Who is it for?
All the lonely people
Where do they all come from?
All the lonely people
Where do they all belong?
Cornelius Fudge, writing the words of a Ministry statement
That no one will hear
No one comes near
Look at him working, darning his socks in the night
When there´s nobody there
What does he care?
All the lonely people...
Cedric Diggory died outside a church
And was buried under a stone with his name
Everybody came
There's a priest wiping the dirt from his hands
As he walks from the grave
No one was saved
All the lonely people...
Ah, look at all the lonely people!...
****
Cho Chang started crying when they mentioned Cedric and had to be taken outside. Everybody else applauded, though.
END PART ONE
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Next time: "On the Qudditch Team/Yellow Submarine"
~~John shouted, "Come on then, everybody, sing along!" So everybody joined in on the chorus:
"We all wanna play on the Quidditch team
On the Qudditch team, on the Quidditch team
We all wanna play on the Quidditch team
On the Qudditch team, on the Quidditch team...."~~
Please review!
Author: SchizoAuthoress
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Um, disrespecting the songs of the greatest band on either side of the Atlantic? Yeah, I'm going to be haunted like nobody's business.
A/N: Thanks, Catriona Snape, for (unintentionally) giving me this idea. It's not *exactly* the same as yours, but if you don't like that I've done this, review it and tell me so. I will remove it then. Anything to do with the Beatles' families and/or love lives is totally made up for creative purposes.
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. The songs aren't mine either. Nor are the Beatles my possession. (Rest in Peace, John and George.)
"The Beatles at Hogwarts"
I'll never forget what happened at Hogwarts a week before Christmas holidays in my sixth year (Harry Potter's fifth). My name is Estrelleia Snape-Malcolm, but you can call me Stella Malcolm.
It was a normal (relatively speaking) day at Hogwarts. Neville had melted his seventh cauldron of the month that day, Crookshanks had landed on Ron's head in the library and gotten him kicked out, Ravenclaw flattened Hufflepuff in the Quidditch match, and Draco had tripped Harry on the way to supper in the Great Hall.
Oliver Wood had returned to scout new talent for the Appleby Arrows, and Percy Weasley was there on some kind of "Ministry business", but I strongly suspect that his mum told him to keep an eye on the younger Weasleys while she and Mr. Wealey went to Romania to visit Charlie.
But, right in the middle of the meal, the Fat Friar charged through the wall right above Dumbledore's head and shouted, "They're coming tonight!"
Immediately, all the ghosts began to chatter and preen in anticipation. Dumbledore looked slightly ruffled by this interruption. Smoothing out his beard, he asked the Friar, "Who is coming?"
"John Lennon and George Harrison!"
****
As well as Paul McCartney and Ringo Starr. Somehow, the ghosts of Hogwarts had arranged a Beatles reunion, post mortem of half the band. (If anybody complains about the fact that the Beatles are Muggles, I'll have you know that Ringo's second cousin has a half-sister whose daughter is the first witch in a long line of Muggles, and that George Harrison's grandfather was a wizard before falling victim to a Memory Charm. Besides that, Paul once dated Celestina Warbeck. And John comes to Hogwarts every so often, now that he's a ghost.)
Anyway, John and Paul argued for a little over what they were going to sing for us, but George decided to be a peacemaker and they stopped when he reasoned with them. Ringo suggested that they perform a "Special Hogwarts Edition" of some of their best songs.
****
"Thomas M. Riddle/Eleanor Rigby"
Ah, look at all the lonely people!
Ah, look at all the lonely people!
Thomas M. Riddle is a Dark Lord in the lurch
Still not as powerful as he has been
Lives with an Animagus
Waits at the window
Casts the Cruciatus curse, then casts it some more
Who is it for?
All the lonely people
Where do they all come from?
All the lonely people
Where do they all belong?
Cornelius Fudge, writing the words of a Ministry statement
That no one will hear
No one comes near
Look at him working, darning his socks in the night
When there´s nobody there
What does he care?
All the lonely people...
Cedric Diggory died outside a church
And was buried under a stone with his name
Everybody came
There's a priest wiping the dirt from his hands
As he walks from the grave
No one was saved
All the lonely people...
Ah, look at all the lonely people!...
****
Cho Chang started crying when they mentioned Cedric and had to be taken outside. Everybody else applauded, though.
END PART ONE
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Next time: "On the Qudditch Team/Yellow Submarine"
~~John shouted, "Come on then, everybody, sing along!" So everybody joined in on the chorus:
"We all wanna play on the Quidditch team
On the Qudditch team, on the Quidditch team
We all wanna play on the Quidditch team
On the Qudditch team, on the Quidditch team...."~~
Please review!