A/N: Hey guys, this is my post-finale treat for you! It's also my first Hanna fic/non-couple fic so that's super cool, too :)
Disclaimer: Nope. Unfortunately this is all Sara Shepard's && I. Marlene King's. I envy them because they so rock. Seriously, just genius.
Enjoy ;)
-betrayed-
hanna marin
Even though she's seen it with her own two eyes, Hanna still has a hard time accepting Mona is A. She can't believe it, or rather she doesn't want to believe it, and she knows her friends don't either.
None of them want Hanna to be hurt and neither does Hanna herself, but she is. She so is.
Because just when things are finally starting to look up a little in her life and the relationship between Caleb and Mona and Mona and the other girls is slowly beginning to mesh, A comes out and attacks. Mona does.
Mona. Hanna repeats it over and over in her head. Mona is A. Mona…
Hanna sighs slightly relieved now that she can put a name to the formerly faceless villain. She can turn in A to the police now. She can rest comfortably at night. She can…
Hanna suddenly stops herself and draws out a shaky breath. Her relief lasted barely a minute; then again, her feelings are appropriate given the circumstances. She just learned her best friend from middle school was the person she became most afraid of. Her best friend from middle school is A.
She's really A. The words seem so foreign in Hanna's mouth and she swears she's having an out-of-body experience similar to that of when Ali "visited" her while she was in the hospital. She wants to scream and wake up and reach for the light switch on her wall and have her mom reassure her that it's all a bad dream. That it's all it ever was and that it's all it ever will be.
But unfortunately for Hanna (and her friends), she knows better. This isn't a nightmare she had when she was five; it's real life and real life isn't just something you can wake up from. Real life is real life for a reason…
There's no escaping it.
There is now no escaping the fact that Mona was A, is A, and is severely mental. There is now no escaping the fact that Mona as A tried to run down Hanna with her car and kill her best friends on multiple occasions. There's now no escaping that Mona is the one responsible for nearly ruining Hanna and her friends' lives.
How could she?
How could she do that to me? And Aria and Emily and Spencer? By this point, the tears are streaming down Hanna's face and she's doing her best not to show anyone around her how bad she is really hurting. She's already kicking herself enough for being stupid and believing everything Mona said. She's already regretting all the times she blew off her friends to hang out with Mona at the mall and the brief period before Ali was found that they'd stopped talking all together. It makes Hanna want to throw up.
I think I'm going to be sick. Hanna says then runs toward the bathroom for cover. Aria follows and so do Spencer and Emily with Caleb and Mrs. Marin trailing closely behind. Hanna makes it by barely a second then leans over the porcelain white bowl and wretches. She stops after a few minutes but her chest keeps on heaving.
She can't remember another instance where she's ever felt this physically sick, (not even one of the many times she purposely shoved her finger down her throat with the intent of losing a couple pounds) and she wonders if Ali might have experienced something similar before she died. She wonders if anyone at all has ever felt so incredibly out of place, lost, and…dirty…
Hanna feels like everything she's ever known (and in turn everything she's ever owned) is dirty, tainted by filth and debris and grime. Hanna feels like Mona's influence has corrupted her very being, destroyed the very person she thought she was and made her into someone she doesn't recognize. Hanna feels like Mona still has the upper hand even though now she's gone and locked away behind bars.
When she's finally calm enough, Hanna lifts her head from the toilet bowl and wipes her mouth off with the washcloth her mother offers her. She washes her hands before tucking her loose blonde waves behind her ears and releasing one last shaky breath.
Caleb scoots closer to her and Aria, Spencer, and Emily all join him, patting her on the back softly every now and then. They whisper unintelligible things to her along the lines of, "you can't make yourself sick, Hanna," and "we're here for you," and "we love you" or so Hanna thinks. She's still too shaken up to focus on anything other than A or rather Mona being A. She's still too shaken up to literally see past Mona unveiling herself as the face behind the infamous black hoodie.
Hanna feels betrayed and when Hanna Marin feels betrayed, there's no getting around that. She's already had plenty of experience with feeling betrayed thanks to her dad and Ali.
She's just shocked she now has to add Mona to the list, too.
A/N: Sorry if there were any proofing errors, I could hardly wait to get this out. The scene with the girls && Dr. Sullivan literally moved me to tears last night and I felt so bad for all the girls, especially Hanna, so this is what you get. Any thoughts? And did you like the finale?