"I am so sick and tired of this goddamn argument over and over Bellatrix, you are just never satisfied with all that I have done for you and for our family, the family I might add that you are always so concerned about your mother disowning you for after repeatedly stating that you don't give a unicorn's arse about her opinion," Severus Snape said angrily, his darkest eyes staring into the gray eyes of the woman that owned his heart and always had. It seemed like just yesterday that he had fallen in love with Bellatrix Lestrange, their son born before he had ever graduated from Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, their two daughters to follow within the next four years, there had been so much going on during the beginning of their torrid secret affair that it was almost astounding that things had ever stayed the same afterwards. In April of 1978 there had been the birth of Ares after nine months of secret meetings of her coming to the castle and keeping things from being found out, he was glad that he was free to leave school two months after his birth just to see him, even if Rodolphus Lestrange did believe the boy to be his own son for the first year or so of his life. May of 1980 had brought the daughter Angel, though she was originally supposed to have been twins and was instead a single birth, their unborn daughter Aquila forever in their hearts as a result. June of 1982, eight months after her arrest, their daughter Adelia had been brought to his home to be raised with their remaining two children, and everything from that point on had been for the three children that he loved more than anything.
"Argument? No, this is not an argument, this is a discussion that you have lost Severus, plain and simple as that! The children will be coming with me as a result of your loss, unless you plan to let Angel off to do whatever she pleases with that blood traitor of a Weasley you allowed her to be with, can't even expect you to look after the simplest of things," she said crossly, her arms folded over her chest as her stormy eyes glared back at him. The moment that she had been freed from Azkaban she had wanted to see him and their children, though she did indeed expect all three of her beloved offspring to join her in the crusade that her dear Dark Lord had planned, even if she did forbid Adelia from fighting because she was too young. Upon getting back to the family that she had left behind she had become angry at the fact that her eldest daughter Angel was in a very serious relationship with Fred Weasley, it was unacceptable that she was with a blood traitor, that was all there was to it, she could merely be happy that Ares had chosen a Pureblood daughter of her cousins Margaret Smith-Black and Regulus Black. That relationship was the reason that she had promised their youngest to the son of fellow Death Eater Igor Karkaroff to ensure that their line continued to only produce the cream of the crop of dark witches and wizards.
"Yes, because it was the right thing to do, to tell her that she couldn't be with someone that made her feel like she had worth and love, that she deserved such things, I'm sorry that I am not the cruel master that you wish me to be and want our children to be able to fall in love and be happy the way that you and I did!" Severus snapped at her, his heart aching at the way that he was speaking to the woman he loved. There hadn't been a moment that they were apart that he hadn't pined for her, begged her to be returned to him and their three children, and once she was he had thought perhaps there was a way for them to be together, but this fight over and over was showing him otherwise. He wouldn't let her take their children to the ranks of the Dark Lord like she planned to, wouldn't allow them to be used as pawns by a madman that really didn't give a fuck about anyone like he claimed to, every part of him knew that he had to fight her tooth and nail on the matter. Still, there was a part of him that wanted to give in, to tell her how sorry he was for arguing with her, to just let her win so that they could move on from this but he couldn't, no matter how afraid he was that he was about to lose the one thing in the world that he had loved for the better part of twenty years now.
"Yes! That would have been the responsible thing to do, to make sure to put a stop to her disgracing our name with that ginger-haired traitor, worst family of pureblood's in history and you've let our darling daughter go and join in with them, she's practically contaminated beyond repair! She has that same headstrong will that you do, and I won't have it making my family line tainted because you were foolish enough not to put a stop to it, but rest assured I will," Bellatrix said stubbornly, watching as her beloved halfblood's face turned sour. A small part of her kicked herself inwardly for going too far, there was no telling what was going to happen seeing as she had never seen that sort of look on his handsome face before, but there was no backing down now, what was said was said and there was no taking it back. There was something different about this fight, she wasn't quite sure how to put her finger on it, but as she watched him stalk towards her, his cloak billowing out around him as he did so, she suddenly felt a shiver course through her as she took an involuntary step backwards. There was nowhere to go really, she was against the wall of the foyer of Lestrange Manor with nowhere to move and he was there without even a sound, their eyes meeting and their faces not more than a few inches apart from one another, she could feel his breath on her face.
"If that is how you feel, then let me make this easy so that your bloodline won't be tainted, after all it's bad enough that you had three bastard children with a measly halfblood like myself, so therefore I shall do you a favor and remove myself from the problem, and if need be you can say that I forced myself on you, that way you never voluntarily gave me those three reminders of your so-called treachery to your bloodline," he said angrily, his heart racing in his chest. "After all, I wouldn't want to be the reason that your mother disowns you, for all I care you can make that arse of a husband of yours claim to be the father of Ares and Adelia then, that way you have nothing more to worry about, then Angel and I shall never bother you again since I know our eldest and youngest will follow you to the ends of the Earth while our middle child is such a disgrace to you," he said, blinking back the tears that threatened to come from his eyes. He had never thought that he would say such a thing but she had brought something out in him that he had never experienced before and he would be damned if he would sit there and take this abuse from her any longer, no matter how much he loved her. He turned away before she could answer, he didn't want to see if she was angry or upset at this point, he just wanted to leave and never look back no matter how much it would destroy him to do so.
A soft gasp left her pouting lips, she hadn't expected something like this to be said, and it was the last thing that she wanted to happen, the thought of losing her eldest daughter and the man that she loved made her feel bitterly empty within, but try as she might there were no words that came to say such to him. "Fine then, a much more proper match to be made there and that way I never have to look upon you and that treacherous daughter of ours again, everyone is happy and perfectly matched," she said, turning her back on him and feeling the pain within her heart as it slowly started to tear her apart from the inside out. She mentally kicked herself, that wasn't anywhere close to what she had wanted to say but the part of her that had been born and bred to lookout for her lineage and bloodline had kicked into overdrive, and it was about to cost her everything that she had had for so long, a tear slipping down her cheek at the thought. She wasn't sure what to do, there was no way to take back what she had just said, and try as she might she couldn't bring herself to turn around and see him, knowing that the hurt look that would be in his eyes would be too much for her. All she wanted was to run away with him and live the life that he had once told her he envisioned for them and their children, but she could never bring herself to do it then and now she always told herself that it was too late, that was all there was to it now.
"Then this is good-bye, I won't bother you again Madam Lestrange, for anything at all," Severus said softly, not trusting his own voice to speak any higher than it already was, there was nothing more to say and nothing else that could be done, everything that they had was truly over and he would soon be needed back at the school since he was Headmaster now. His shoulders set and his head held high, he walked out the door of the Manor and Apparated before she could say or do anything else, there was nothing else he wanted to hear from her at this point and needed to be away before he backed down from what he had said. Once at Spinner's End, his pit-stop before going back to Hogwarts, he felt the tears slide down his cheeks as his eyes landed on the portrait above the mantle of himself holding Bellatrix in his arms, Ares sitting beside him while she held Angel in her arms, long before Adelia was ever a thought in the wind. His eyes roamed over the pictures that littered the room of his three children and eight godchildren, the thought of never seeing or speaking to Ares or Adelia ever again making his heart ache as he fell to his knees in what could only be considered emotional agony, there was no other way to describe it at all.
Bellatrix slid down to the floor in the foyer once he was gone, erupting into sobs as she brought her knees to her chest and rested her forehead upon them, there was nothing that could ever begin to describe the loss of the only man that she had ever fallen in love with, the man that she had fought each and every day to come back for and he was gone from her life now. Furthermore, the thought of never looking upon her eldest daughter or speaking to her again was the most horrible thought in the world to her, she didn't know how her own mother had ever turned her back on Andromeda if the pain of losing a child was this unbearable. She forced herself to her feet, knowing Rodolphus would be back any moment and she didn't want to give him the satisfaction of seeing her in such a state, heading to her bedchamber where she often locked herself away to be nearest to her three children, photos of them littering the walls and every available surface, remembering the day that Severus had brought them to her when she had gotten out of prison. The tears began to fall heavier now that she was in front of the only photo she had of all three of her children together, her most prized possession, gazing at the simple perfection of her only son and the arrogant smirk he had that mirrored his fathers, the beauty of their daughters that looked so like herself but held the inquisitive eyes that they had inherited from their father. She turned away, sitting on her bed to get the sobs out while pressing her face to the pillow, wondering how in the world she was to face Severus the next day at the meeting at Malfoy Manor.
When the meeting rolled around, she put on her brave face, the one that dares the others to mess with her because she is the most loyal Death Eater that their Dark Lord has, and as such she will always be a force to be reckoned with, telling her youngest Adelia to sit in the parlor since she is too young to participate properly in the meeting before sitting beside her son Ares. Looking at her eldest makes her stomach twist into knots long before she ever hears Severus arrive with their daughter Angel, the thought alone making her worry that she won't be able to carry on the facade that she hurt badly for the things that were said between them. Her eyes moved to her eldest daughter when she walked into the room, taking in the midnight hair and pure blue eyes that she had, the way that she prided herself on being different from each and every person in the room, and her heart began to sob at the thought once more that she would never speak to her again once this mess was over. She refused to look at Severus, it was hard enough to know that she had lost her long standing relationship with him, let alone to look upon him now that they were no longer together, knowing she would never let the bumbling oaf she was married to claim her children as his own no matter how coldly she had said that would.
Severus took a deep breath that went unnoticed as he sat down across the table from Bellatrix, his usual spot as one of the two most faithful followers that Voldemort had, making sure that his daughter was seated before he made himself comfortable without ever looking at the woman that made his heart race. He knew that Ares and Angel would know something was wrong almost immediately but that was a topic that he wasn't willing to talk about with either of them, especially not with so many of the horcruxes being destroyed and their daughter's birthday coming up, their son's having just passed a few weeks earlier on the thirteenth of April. The meeting commenced, neither one ever looking at the other as their Lord spoke to them about the things that needed to be done and immediately so, making sure that every person knew what they had to do before being dismissed, and without a word he led Angel out of the room without another look back at Bella. He made sure to wait for Draco, the three of them needing to head back to the school together before dawn hit, and without more than a moment's notice they were back in his office, Draco leaving almost the moment that they had arrived but Angel lingering. "I don't wish to talk about it my dear," he said softly, though he knew that she wouldn't leave him be just like that.
"I know, but don't try to lie to me and say that nothing is wrong when there is," Angel said softly, making them each a cup of tea with cookies that she had made for him during the Easter holiday not that long ago, sitting in the chair across from his and crossing her legs. He sighed softly as he looked at her, still astounded that she was nearly eighteen years old and how much like her mother that she looked, not to mention the fact that he had learned that shortly after nearly being drowned in the Black Lake at the end of her sixth year she had run straight to Fred Weasley and the two had married less than a week later. He sipped his tea, the two of them sitting in silence and looking at one another, and he knew that this was one of the many things he liked about his eldest daughter, that he could be in her company and never say a word between them but feel instantly cheered up as though he could battle the world. He wanted to tell her what happened, wanted to tell her to leave the Death Eaters and stop playing spy for the Order now that he no longer could, wanted to tell her to run as far and fast from here as she could, but he knew that she never would, she was too much like him to ever desert the people that needed her most. He let her sleep in his bed since he knew that he wouldn't get a moment's rest and he didn't want her too far from him this evening with all that was going on within the castle.
"Mum, you know that I won't pry, but there is something going on and nothing you say otherwise is going to make me notice it less," Ares said softly, serving dinner to the table for himself, his mother and Adelia, who had also noticed that something was going on though she didn't know what. Bellatrix sighed softly, trying to focus on the meal before her so that she wouldn't have to address what was going on to her only son and youngest daughter, she didn't want them involved with anything that was going on between herself and their father, especially after all that had been said between them. There was no way that she was going to tell them that she and their father had ended their relationship, let alone that they might never get the chance to see him or their sister again, that things were so bad that she wasn't sure that they could ever really be fixed again, it was too painful to even attempt to think about. Still, she knew that her children weren't stupid, Ares had just turned twenty and Adelia would soon be sixteen, they were old enough to realize that something was going on even if neither she nor her now ex-beloved wouldn't talk to them about it.
"It's nothing darling, just a...misunderstanding between Mummy and Daddy is all, things will be back to normal before you even know it, just wait and see," she lied with a straight face that gave nothing away, though she saw the way that Adelia watched her, and knew that if anyone was on to her it would be her youngest. There was nothing more to say as she took a bite of the roast that they were eating that evening, her eyes drifting to the seat that would normally be occupied by Angel and she felt that ache in her heart return before looking back to her youngest, whom she knew had to go back to school before the night was over. Sipping her wine, she carried on her part of the meal in silence, not wanting to alert either child to what was going on in her personal life, she would not be the first to say something even close to an apology, there was just no way that she could. Even if she wanted to, her words never came out the way that she wanted them to, she always seemed to say the opposite of what she was thinking or feeling no matter what, and as her children talked she found herself wondering why she always pushed everyone away from her when they got too close.
"Mummy, I know you say it's nothing, but I think you know that neither of us believe that, we're not going to push you to tell us but we have a right to know if it concerns us," Adelia said softly, done with her meal and grabbing her cloak to get ready to head back to Hogwarts. She knew that her sister would most likely be in their fathers office since she was constantly picked on by the other Ravenclaw students while she herself was in Slytherin and was rather revered because of who her parents were, she rather liked it that way for that matter but she still wondered why people messed with her older sister so much. She had more than taken care of the people that had hurt Angel at the end of the previous year, without a single regret to be had for that matter, but she had never told anyone about that, she was fiercely protective of her family.
"Adelia, I assure you that if it does concern you, Ares or Angel then you will be the first to know it the moment that your father and I know that it does, you have my word," Bellatrix said, knowing that she was lying to her youngest daughter's face and yet there was nothing else that she could do, she didn't want any of them to worry themselves over this matter. Things were bad enough without letting them know that she and Severus might never reconcile again unless he came to her begging her forgiveness and she let him stew over it thinking that she may not give it before she gave in like she always did, though the thought made her feel badly about herself. She got to her feet to hug her youngest and kiss her forehead before letting Ares take her back to school, knowing her son would travel to the tavern that his girlfriend Katherine Black owned to stay with her for the night like he often did, leaving her alone in Lestrange Manor once more. She cleaned away the mess and headed to her bedchamber once more to spend the evening alone, plotting the ways that she would make Severus grovel for her forgiveness when he finally came crawling back to her as he always did, sure that it wouldn't take more than a few days time.
The days ticked by, and with each day that passed the realization that he wasn't come to apologize and reconcile became more and more apparent to Bellatrix, who immersed herself in the tasks of the Dark Lord as requested, especially when the mudblood was in her possession for torture, it was these times that made her forget all about the pain of what had happened. Seeing Severus at the meetings were the only hard part, looking at her eldest daughter was even worse since they hadn't spoken in days, it was as if things were turned upside down and there was no getting around this, things were totally broken beyond repair. Severus as well felt that way, he couldn't give in this time because he knew that if he did then things would be just as they were, and for his children's sakes and well being he couldn't allow that, he wanted them as far away from the fight as he could get. No matter how much it destroyed him to lose what the two of them had shared in twenty years, the safety of his children was more important to him than anything in the world, and as the battle of Hogwarts neared closer he knew that there was no turning back now.
The second of May, 1998, their daughter Angel's eighteenth birthday was not a day either Bellatrix nor Severus had expected for everything to go entirely to Hell, but there was nothing that could have possibly warned them or prepared them for how the day was going to go. Severus would meet his untimely end at the hands of the Dark Lord in the worst possible way, and as he lay there once Harry Potter had arrived and he told him to take his tears, all he could think about was Bellatrix and how he would give anything to tell her that he was sorry, that he loved her and always would, but there would never be time as the cold hands of death came to take him away. Bellatrix was running through the hallways dueling her estranged sister's only child, Nymphadora Tonks, and killing her when she overheard Potter and telling his friends that Snape was dead, where he had left his body behind, and her heart sank, surely this had to be a joke. Still, there was nothing to chance, and she made her way through the castle and off the grounds to Apparate to the Shrieking Shack, falling to her knees beside the body of her now dead beloved as the tears started to fall. "No...no Severus, please..." she whispered, begging in agonizing sobs as she pulled him against her, cradling him in her arms as her fingers found an envelope in his cloak pocket, pulling it out to read her name across it and opening it to read.
'Beloved Bellatrix,
My dearest, if you have found this than the unimaginable has happened and I have fallen, without the chance to tell you just how sorry I am and how much I love you, how much that I always have, for words can never express to you just how sorry that I am. I have fallen by the Dark Lord's hand, the man that you served so loyally, by no fault of your own, but he is the reason that I am no longer here with you, and all I can do besides beg your forgiveness is to beg you to make the children leave, to run yourself and never look back. The thought of you dying for a war that doesn't truly stand for anything that you believe it, to be used as a pawn in his game is more than I can bear, and I would never forgive myself if I didn't beg you to leave and never return, no matter the cost or what you may have to do in order to do so. Please, dearest, don't die for this cause, live on and do the things that we once spoke of doing so long ago, live your life to the fullest and never have a single regret because I love you, in this life and the next for as long as we both live and die, you were my heart and soul, and without you I shall never be whole. Thus being said, I will wait for you no matter how long it takes for us to be reunited at long last, for you have always been worth the wait and there is no one in the world that I would rather wait to be with but you, my beautiful Bellatrix, the Queen of my Heart and Keeper of my Soul. I will never leave you so you will never be without me, not even death can truly part us my love, just please save yourself and our children, now it is your turn to see them safe and sound, and I trust you with this job fully.
With all the love that I possess,
Severus.'
Her eyes skimmed over the letter three times as she sat there with naught but his dead body in her arms, realizing that she should have given up, should have told him that she was sorry, that she should have forced herself to manage to say the words that she so longed to tell him, and as she folded the letter to place in her pocket, she tried to pull herself together. She kissed his lips, her tears falling from her cheeks to his and sliding down his frozen face as she caressed his cheek tenderly, she knew that time was wasting, that she would have to figure out what to do, but the thought of leaving him here alone broke her heart. "I should have run away with you all those years ago, we could have raised our babies in France together and never looked back, I should have told you how much you meant to me and that you were the reason that I kept it together in Azkaban, that all I wanted to do was the get back to you and be by your side once more with our children. You were all I ever wanted, you gave me everything that anyone could ever ask for and I repaid you with cruelty and sarcasm, I am so sorry Severus, so sorry, I would do anything to bring you back and say it to your face," she whispered between racking sobs before she felt her Dark Mark burn, knowing that Voldemort was calling them all back to him and that she had to go. "I promise, Severus," she whispered, kissing his lips once more before leaving to go back to the meeting place, knowing that she would have to appear completely faithful once more.
Their daughter's birthday, of all days, it was all that she could think of as she made her way to the clearing in the forest that they had convened in, heading straight for her only son and pulling him aside, he needed to know what was going on and what they were to do as a result of it all now, her eyes meeting his as they stood together. "Ares, darling, your father has been slain, and not by the opposition but by our very own Lord, and what I want you to do now is to at least find Adelia and get her as far from here as possible, don't let anyone see you or follow you, that is the most important thing, and if you find Angel then convince her to run as well," she said softly, watching his eyes widen and shaking her head so that he didn't attract attention to them. "I can't let the same fate fall upon any of you, losing your father is hard enough without the realization that I have put you all in mortal danger, I won't lose my children today, I can't and I won't," she said, tears shining in her eyes as Ares wrapped his arms around her. She closed her eyes to compose herself, she knew that she needed to get ahold of herself before anyone realized that something was going on and that she wasn't entirely herself, knowing just how her sister and brother in law felt, all she wanted to know was that he child was alright.
"I promise to protect her with my life Mum, no matter what, I will take Adelia and run as far from here as I can, no harm shall befall her so long as I am alive," Ares whispered, holding onto his mother tightly as he blinked back tears, the thought of never again seeing his father almost unreal to him still. He knew that he needed to find Angel and Katherine if he could, Hell he would even protect his blood traitor of a brother in law if need be in order to keep his sister and the woman that he loved safe, that was all that he could do since he was pretty sure that his mother wouldn't allow him to protect her as well. "What are you going to do, how are you going to get out of this?" he asked her softly, his eyes meeting hers once more, he didn't want to think of anything happening to his mother, losing his father was already bad enough without that happening as well, that was all there was to it.
"I have Polyjuice Potion and a plan, I just have to find someone to use it on and make myself feel sorry about it later, but should all go according to plan I will find a way to contact you and your sisters so that you know that it worked and that I am well, and where to find me so that we can be together again," she whispered softly as she released her son just before the Dark Lord arrived, weakened but feeling victorious. She used the time when Potter showed up to exact her plan, pulling aside a young woman and forcing her to drink the potion to turn into her, then placing her under the Imperius Curse in order to make her do exactly as she commanded, there would be no room for error, and she would have to time it all as perfectly as possible. She commanded her lookalike to pick a fight and do anything that she could in order to get herself killed, taunting and attacks, anything and everything that she could think of in order to be sure that this other her was killed where everyone could see it and think that she herself was gone.
Taking great care, she sent her lookalike back to the others before using a concealment charm to help her get back to Hogwarts to check on what was going on there, just to see if she could find her eldest daughter and be sure that she was alive before she left, there wasn't a moment to lose as she looked around outside the Great Hall before peering inside. The Weasley's were crowded around her daughter, there seemed to be a lot of thanking going on and from what she could hear, her Angel had managed to save their son Fred from certain death just moments before he would have been hit by the Killing Curse, and surprisingly a surge of pride coursed through her. "Be safe my little Angel," she whispered softly before moving on through the castle to exit out the other side just as the next part of the battle was to ensue, knowing that her son wouldn't let her down about his sisters as she fled into the darkness, coming once more to the Shrieking Shack. She stared at it sadly, knowing that he beloved Severus would never be able to come with her now before she Apparated to Lestrange Manor to write four letters, one to all three of her children collectively, then a separate one for each of them in turn, packing the few things that she needed to keep before leaving the last home that she had known for good.
'My children,
Forgive not only my absence from your lives now and since you were just children, but that I have no good reason to explain what needs to be said and how much I regret not being there for you all when you needed me the most, there will never be words to describe that regret to you all. From the moment each of you came into my life, a part of my heart and a piece of my soul was instilled within each and every one of you, and that makes the three of you my legacy on this Earth, no matter how much disdain my family may show toward you all. You three were my greatest treasure and the best gift that any mother could possibly wish to have, I only wish that it hadn't taken me so long not only to realize this but to be able to put it into the words that you all so deserve to hear from me after so long. Your father and I dreamt of a world that would be much better than this for the three of you and someday I hope to know that this world that I envisioned for you three has come to exist at long last, because you three are all that matter to me in this life.
Ares Cygnus Severus Snape, my beloved baby boy and my unexpected ray of light, you have no idea how much I didn't want to be a mother until the day that I held you in my arms and you held my finger in your tiny hand, it was then that I experienced love in a new manner of speaking and for that you will never know how indebted to you that I am. From the moment that you came into the world I knew that not only would I see only great things in you, but that you would be what changed my life forevermore, and I was right on both counts. I expect you to be a gentleman with any lady that steals your heart, and I expect you to make me proud, as you already do and undoubtedly always will, for you are the only son I have ever and will ever have, and I love you with all of my heart. I wish to see you and Katherine make me a grandmother someday and to show me how well those Black genes look in your offspring and their own for generations to come.
Angel Elaine Bella Snape, my first born daughter and what I once called the bane of my very existence, more perfect than a snowflake and the only child that I allowed that bloody muggle technology to be used on me for, you made me proud the moment that I laid eyes on you, and though I had expected twins, you had enough personality for both. I know that I have been terribly hard on you and unfair to you where your heart is concerned, I can only blame my upbringing and the values taught to me for such an atrocity, for I wish you to know true love as only you can, my sweet rebel. You have always made me proud, I wish that I had told you that sooner and let you know that you are truly the perfect daughter to me, so much like your father with all of my beauty, I know that you will only do wonderful things in your future. I love you, sweet child of mine, there has never been a moment that I have not, and despite how much I may despise those blaster gingers, I know that you are safe and happy with him, that is what truly matters to me forever.
Adelia Cassiopeia Rhiannon Snape, my surprise miracle and sweet baby girl, how I wish that I could have held you in my arms for more than the mere moments that I was allowed to before you were taken from me to be taken to your father, not a day passed by that I didn't think about you and wish to be with you. I know that in you is a powerful and talented young woman that is going to take this world and make it her own, just as I once did and you will outshine me like the bright star that you are, and I will be beaming with pride as a result. I adore you, cherish you and love you with all the feelings that a mother could possess for a child, and I know that you are going to be the most wondrous woman in the world, and I will be proud to stand there and say that is my daughter. Never let anyone stand in your way nor tell you what you can and cannot be, there is nothing that can truly bring you down, now or ever.
My sweet children, how I wish that things could have been different, not only with your father and myself, but the way that you deserved to be raised and loved, and if I could go back and change it all, I never would have gone to the Longbottom home that night, nor would I have ever left your father's side. I love you all and will always be with you, no matter what.
All of my love,
Mummy'
Each of the remaining letters held the numbers of private vaults complete with keys and codes for each child that had been set up for them when they were first realized to be in existence, it was something that her father had insisted on doing for them before he had passed on, and one never argued with Cygnus Black and won. As she left her home at long last, Bellatrix looked back on last time, closing her eyes at the memories that she shared with her Severus here, the many torrid nights in her bedchamber and within the chambers of her husband, the few mornings that her husband had been so drunk that she had slipped away to Spinner's End for meals with Severus and their children. That would be the last place on her visit before she was to leave town, standing now in the kitchen of the home that had belonged to Severus and their children, her fingers tracing the piano that she had once played with Angel on her lap as she entered the parlor, her eyes scanning each photo that was around the room. She felt the tears slide down her cheeks as she sat on the rocking chair that she had once cradled Ares in so long ago, that she would have loved to cradle Adelia in had she not been in prison at the time of her birth. "I will be brave, Severus," she whispered softly to the thin air of the room before she Apparated to the French chateau that they had once planned on running away to and raising their children in.
Once within the foyer, she waved a hand so that the lights came on to light the large mansion, remembering the only time that they had come here when Ares had just been a mere babe and she was pregnant with Angel and Aquila, tears stinging her eyes as she slowly started to arrange all the photos that she had taken from her former home around the room. "I know nothing at all, but I should have told you how I felt about you when I had the chance, I was still learning to love and just be myself, I will never give up on you," she whispered as she placed a photo of Severus on the mantle, placing his final letter to her underneath it for safe keeping before retiring to the master bedroom. Her fingers traced the bedposts as she let her cloak fall to the floor, falling to the bed to allow herself to finally cry her lost tears for the man that she loved more than anything in the world, apologizing for not being able to get to him. "I would have followed you, should have followed you," she whimpered softly through her tears as exhaustion ebbed in on her before sleep took her under at long last.
It took a month before she was able to contact any of her children safely, using her cousin Margaret as a liaison to get word to them and feeling grateful when the Southern witch showed up to check on her, keeping her company in the large mansion as she worked to get it fixed up before the children would be able to get away to see her. She learned that Ares had been arrested for his crimes during the war but that Angel had been able to say that he was acting as a spy like she had in order to gain information that she could not, prompting his release so that he could take care of Adelia rather than have her stay with her betrothed fiance instead. Showering, she didn't know that her children arrived as she worked to make herself presentable while Margaret made dinner for them all downstairs, knowing that her own daughter would be coming along as would Angel's husband, and Bellatrix reminded herself that she needed to be on her best behavior to show she would be changing her ways. She heard Adelia before she saw her, hurrying downstairs to see her youngest and fling her arms around her before her son and eldest daughter joined them in the embrace, tears staining their cheeks as they reunited at long last, Margaret ushering everyone into the dining room to eat.
The meal, though tense at first, became a laughing mess as they shared memories of Severus, each of them better than the last including Fred's, and Bellatrix had to admit that she liked the way that the redhead watched her daughter the way that Severus had once watched herself, it was the only thing about him she seemed to care for though she'd never admit it aloud. She came to cherish the visits from Margaret and her children, loving the letters that she received even though they had to be addressed as the alias that she had come up with for herself to live under to avoid detection seeing as the wizarding world believed her to be dead and gone. It was because of this that she was unable to attend any of her children's weddings or the births of any of their children, but the photographs and muggle movies of the events that Margaret brought her made up for that, seeing her twin grandsons from Ares this way as well as the twins that Angel gave birth to that same year, thankful that Adelia didn't have a child for another two years, the same year that Ares and Katherine welcomed their third child into the world. She smiled and laughed, cried and regretted not being able to be there for them when they needed her, but most of all she wept because Severus couldn't be there to see it all.
The years came to pass her by, and each day she ventured out to do another of the many things that she and her beloved had once proposed to do together, learning to like the few muggle neighbors that she had that seemed to enjoy her erratic speeches about her hometown back in England and finding her eccentric ways charming. It was a quarter after one when the clock caught her attention, sighing softly as she remembered all the nights that she and Severus met at this very time at his home in Spinner's End so long ago, and how she would beg the night to stop so that she wouldn't have to leave his arms again. Each night she would lie in bed now and talk to him about her day as if he could hear her and enjoyed listening to her ramble on about learning something new, such as the way the open market in town operated or how to use a muggle telephone to talk to Angel, who often loved such mundane devices in her life. She rambled on about their grandchildren and how much she adored each and every one of them, even the little boy with the ginger hair that had a singing voice that was every bit as powerful as Angel's was, beaming with pride at the thought.
Holidays were often hosted at her home to be able to stay in secret and be able to see her six grandchildren, three children and three in-laws, enjoying every bit of time that she got to spend with them, teaching her grandsons to play the piano and her granddaughters how to waltz as their parents would demonstrate as such for them. She would dance with Margaret, who had lived the widow's life since the passing of her beloved Regulus soon after the birth of her own children and knew the pain that Bellatrix was going through, the two spending much time together and becoming as close as they had been as children once more. Still, nothing could mend the void left by losing her beloved Severus as she had, there would never be another for her and she knew as such, wishing for the millionth time that she had told him her true feelings for him and all that he had meant to her. There were days when the pain was so great that she had trouble getting out of bed to think of anything or do anything that she had planned, she had never thought it would hurt so much to have him gone from her side and she wished that he had stayed there with her.
Everywhere she looked was a memory of her beloved, remembering the first night she had spent with Severus after her escape from Azkaban, sitting at the breakfast table in one of his old shirts for breakfast, the kids asking her what was wrong with her neck with knowing smirks, the laughter that would emit from Sev's lips always bringing laughter to her pouting lips. It was that morning that she had seen just how much her children were so much like herself and their father, and saw just how grown up they all were since they were thirteen, fifteen and seventeen at the time, but she wouldn't have traded that moment in for anything in the world. Even now the memory brought a smile to her lips as she bustled around her kitchen to prepare breakfast, feeling the ever present emptiness of the chateau and the loneliness that it brought to her, and it was that moment that she decided to travel. She didn't know where she would go, but she remembered the many places they had once talked about seeing together and knew that was what she wanted to do, and to send word to each of her children in every place that she visited.
Each place she went, she left a memory of her and Severus there, to honor that she went there with his memory in mind, tears and all as she did so, but it felt good to know that he was always there with her, no matter how much she felt like she couldn't go on any longer at times, she knew that she had to try and keep trying. When she finally arrived back to her French home, it didn't feel like home to her, and she decided to leave it to Adelia and her family since she had left her English country home to Angel and her Welsh estate to Ares when the time came for her to leave them for good, and though she often wondered when that would be, she knew that he would be waiting for her. It had been nearly ten years that she had lived on without the man that she loved, and never once did her love for him even begin to fade or falter, on the contrary it had only made her love and miss him all the more over the years that they were apart. She finally abandoned safety to return home at last, walking into the still standing Lestrange Manor for the first time since the night she had fled for her life, breathing in the musty room, turning to see Angel standing there, as if she had known that her mother would be there, and the two embraced for a long time. "Take me to Spinner's End my darling, Mummy is not as strong as she once was," she said tiredly, holding tight to her eldest daughter as they Apparated to the home that had been left to Angel so long ago.
It was just as Bellatrix had remembered it from that final night there, letting go of her daughter to walk through the familiar rooms before stopping in the kitchen, staring out into the backyard where she swore she saw her beloved Severus standing, walking outside to see nothing more than sunlight glinting off the many crystal windchimes that had been hanging there forever. She almost felt lightheaded as she grasped the post to keep her balance, Angel calling for Fred who caught Bella just before she collapsed to the ground at his feet and carrying her inside to the sitting room where he laid her on the couch. "I once cradled my sweet baby girl here," Bellatrix whispered as her grandchildren Thomas and Thalia came to sit by her, neither one wanting to leave her side as Angel waited on her, tears running down her cheeks. "Don't cry darling, I have waited for nearly ten years to see your father just once more and I swear I saw him there in the backyard, I finally feel as though my life has meaning once more," she whispered softly, closing her eyes and falling asleep, Angel covering her with a light blanket before going to alert her brother and sister of what was transpiring in their childhood home. Ares and Adelia arrived with their own families almost immediately, Margaret joining them soon after to stay with Bellatrix, none of them sure what to expect as night fell and everyone finally retired for the night, Margaret staying in the chair that she had once occupied so many nights when Bellatrix had first been arrested and Severus had needed help with his children while she raised her own.
"Margaret, honestly don't you ever sleep?" Bellatrix said weakly, her stormy gray eyes focused on the chartreuse ones of the Southern pureblood that was not only her cousin but her best friend after so many years, and the one person she was glad to spend what she thought could be her last moments with. She reached out a shaking hand, no matter how much she was eager to see her beloved Severus once more, she was afraid of what would happen to her sweet children and grandchildren, of whether things would be alright once she was gone, and she immediately felt at ease when Margaret took her hand in both of her own, her face aglow with the brilliance of her smile. "Had my cousin ever told you that your radiance could outshine even the purest of angels, he says that it's never changed even for a moment," she said softly, watching the tears build in her best friend's eyes before they started to fall.
"That sounds like that chamin' cousin a yours don't it, he always did know how tah bring a smile to a lady's lips no matter tha occasion at hand," she said, her Creole accent ever thick and present as she squeezed Bella's hand gently, knowing that if she was delivering messages from her beloved Regulus that it wouldn't be much longer now. She started to call for the children but a look from Bella told her not to do so, and she understood that she didn't want her babies to see her leave this world and have the light bleed from her eyes at long last, the tears falling down her cheeks as she sat beside her. "Ah gotta admit that Ah don't much like tha thought of bein' tha only one left outta all of us, but you tell that cousin a yours that Ah gonna be waitin' for him patiently like Ah have been all these years, Ah know that he ain't never left me even once," she said softly, sniffling softly. She felt the faint squeeze of her dearest friend's hand upon her own, her cat-like eyes meeting the stormy ones of the beautiful woman that had been a constant in her life for as long as she could remember.
"He knows darling, he says there has never been a moment that he hasn't admired what you've done for all those around you and hasn't been so proud to call you his wife, and that the moment that your time is up he is carrying you up all the stairs into Heaven with him because he won't step foot in there without you. Damn you saps for making a woman want to cry on her deathbed like this, I should hex you into the middle of next week but I suspect you might be a tad faster than I am after all these years that I've let my arse balloon out," Bellatrix said weakly. She watched Margaret laugh through her tears and gave her a soft smile, even death wouldn't take the fight out of her completely, but she was glad that it was almost over now, she was tired and she knew that it showed, but her children were grown with children of their own, they were all so successful and happy, that was what she had needed to see before her time was up. "Just don't come to join us too soon, you have so much life in you still and this world still needs you, but when your number comes up, I will be waiting to give you Hell once again."
Margaret laughed softly, holding her friend's hand in her own, nodding her head, the words of her dead husband and her dying friend making her heart ache, but she knew that this was life and it was inevitable to lose each other at some point in time, she just hadn't expected to be the youngest and be the only one left. "It ain't ballooned out much, ya still just as gorgeous as tha first time Ah ever laid eyes on ya when Daddy brought me to see your Mama all them years ago, and Ah am so glad he did, ya been one a mah favorite people in tha world, and always will be. Ya tell Sevvy that he best be takin' good care a ya when he cames for ya or Ah gonna have tah kick his ass when Ah get up there with y'all one day," she said softly, letting the tears fall freely in front of her. She shivered, and she knew that Severus was in the room with them without having to see him, she knew that he would be the one to come and take their beloved Bellatrix to the afterlife at long last where they could be together at long last. "Ah love ya darlin' and Ah always will," she whispered softly, closing her eyes as the tears stung so badly that she couldn't stand it any longer.
"I love you too Margaret, forever...my giddy aunt he's here, I can see him with my own two eyes darling and he's so beautiful, more than I even remembered all those years ago, and he came for me just as he promised that he would," Bellatrix whispered softly as her eyes fell on the ghostly figure of the only man that had ever made her feel anything and everything all at once. She felt no fear as he came closer to her, and as he bent, she lifted her face to his at last to let her lips meet his in the first kiss of the rest of her eternity, able to touch him and feel his arms around her at long last as she was freed from her body. "You came for me," she whispered softly, letting her eyes flutter open to see his face at long last, the same handsome face that made her weak in the knees and sent her heart all a flutter.
"Of course I did, there was no way that I was leaving this world forever without you dearest, you are worth waiting for, but I am so sorry I never apologized for that damn fight that we had, nothing is worth never kissing your lips again," Severus said as he pulled her close, this kiss longer, deeper as Margaret cried over the dead body of her now gone friend. Bellatrix slipped her arms around his neck and pressed as close to him as she could get at long last, feeling whole and complete for the first time in ten years since his passing, and there was nothing that was going to make her let go of him now that she had him at long last.
"No, never speak of that again, we were both to blame and we're together now, and I never want to be without you again for as long as eternity lasts for the two of us now, I am in your arms and that is all that will ever matter to me," she whispered, kissing his lips softly, chastely, her fingers entwined with his as a movement caught her eyes. She looked over to see her favorite cousin Regulus standing beside his widow, his fingers gently stroking her hair through she couldn't feel it as he attempted to comfort her as best he could despite her not being able to see him. "She was right, she always felt you all around her Reg, as though you had never left her all those years ago, she swore that she felt you all moments of the day and night," she said softly to her cousin, who gave her the softest of smiles as he nodded.
"I have never strayed from her, for how can one truly move on when their soul isn't theirs to give to the afterlife? She is my heart and my soul, therefore I can never leave until she is within my arms once more and I will wait a thousand years if that is what it takes to be with her once more. Now get out of here you lousy lovebirds, you've pined long enough," Regulus said with the trademark Black smirk as he turned from them to look over Margaret once more, and Bellatrix felt her heart ache for them, she was so selfish to have felt so alone for a mere ten years when they had been parted for almost thirty years now. She looked back to Severus to find him looking down at her, leading her into the backyard of the home where the moonlight shone down on them and bathed them in it's mysterious glow, his fingers still tangled with her own.
"Bellatrix, I have waited for you for ten years and all I want to do now is dance with you in the moonlight until the moment that we are no longer bound here and can start life the way that we once dreamt despite it being on a plane that we never expected," he said softly, and a smile came to her lips as she nodded. She slid her arms around his neck as his hands slid expertly to her waist, their bodies coming together to sway to a tune that only the two of them could hear as lights turned on throughout the house, and the true death of Bellatrix Lestrange came to pass at long last amidst tears of her children who were truly alone at long last. Sad as the thought was, neither of them stopped their motion together, for it had been the one thing that both had waited so long for, and as she whispered for him never to let her go, she felt him grip her tightly as they moved together, his whispered promise that he never would echoing in her ears and bringing a smile to her lips at long last.
Ares, Angel and Adelia stood around the funeral pyre at the French chateau where they would be burning the remains of their mother a few days later, the three siblings bowing their head in their silent partings as the very few guests that had come to attend murmured softly. All of Margaret's children had come to pay their respects to their fallen godmother, as had Narcissa and Lucius with Draco and his wife in tow with their own child, the Weasley clan and many others that were allowed to know the truth. Tears streaming down their faces, the three children pointed their wand tips together and allowed the fire that would claim their mother to ignite, standing together with their spouses holding them tightly, she was finally gone from their lives. "Good-bye Mummy, the most beautiful witch that ever lived," Adelia whispered softly as tears slid down her cheeks, turning away to her husband to bury her face in his chest.
"I love you Mum, more than anything," Ares whispered, his words choked a bit as Katherine gripped his hand and pulled him closer to her, tears falling down his cheeks as he turned to his wife and allowed her to comfort him at long last. He had finally gotten to see the side of his mother he had so craved and now that she was gone he wasn't sure what to do except to spend each and every moment with his sons Tobias and Tristan as well as his daughter Starlight that he could, to make each and every moment count.
"Mummy...thank you, for everything, I hope to always make you proud of me," Angel whispered as Fred wrapped his arms around her, letting her turn her face into his chest and holding her close as she gripped his jacket tightly to hold him as close as she could. She knew how her mother felt, the way that she looked whenever she spoke about her father was the same look she got when she spoke of Fred, and she knew that one day if Fred went before her that she would be in the same boat of her mother. The fire blazed on throughout the day as the guests offered their condolences to the children over their loss while Margaret stood by the pyre looking down at the ashes of her best friend, smiling softly as she whispered her blessing to her before waving a hand to send the ashed skyward and free her at long last, nodding to her daughter Raven, who pressed a button on the stereo they had set up to play jazz music. As was old New Orleans custom, they were sending her off with a bang, the only way that a witch like Bellatrix should be sent off, just like she had done for Severus ten years earlier and would have done at her own someday.
Once night fell, the children slept at the chateau that night because it was too late to head back to England as a unit, needing a night together for just the three of them, their spouses taking the children back with them to their respective homes for the evening. "I can't believe that she's gone," Ares whispered as he lay on his back on the couch, twirling his wand through his fingertips as he stared up at the ceiling, his tie undone and his cheeks stained with tears still. He had come a long way from his life as a Death Eater, owning a share of his wife's tavern as well a greatly popular apothecary shop that people came from miles around to visit in honor of his father.
"Me either, I never thought the day would come that the greatly formidable Bellatrix Lestrange would be taken from this world, it all seems so much emptier without her and Father here to share it with doesn't it, almost as if the world no longer sits right," Angel said softly as she lay on the floor in front of the fireplace, her ankles crossed and her head propped up on a pillow, her blue eyes closed as she sighed. She had never thought that losing her parents would make her feel so empty inside, especially since they passed ten years apart, but she supposed no one ever prepared themselves for such things in the long run. She had changed quite a bit since the loss of their father, having had a successful music career for many years though she often spent time working in her husband's jokeshop and had been offered the position of Potions Mistress which she was considering taking.
"We should take her wand to Spinner's End, she would want a piece of herself left at the home where they started their family, that's what I think, and she would want us to do it together, she finally got to make up for all that time she missed out with us and would want us to carry on those traditions," Adelia said from the chair she had flopped in, her feet lingering on the coffee table. Since the loss of her father, the baby of the Snape children had become a very successful artist in both the wizarding and muggle worlds that people flocked to see when she held her shows, owning her own studio as well. She had wanted to do something that showcased her talents since her father had been so encouraging about it and she had certainly done so over the years that had passed.
The others agreed, all of the grabbing their coats and her wand to take back to their childhood home to place with their father's where it so rightfully belonged by the only photo of the two of them in existence from years before any of them were born that had been taken by Margaret so long ago and sat on the mantle now. Together, the three of them walked into the backyard, stopping dead still as they did so as they saw the ghostly apparitions of their parents sitting in the garden together, her head resting on his shoulder and his arm draped around her shoulder holding her close, the two of them both looking over their shoulders at them. Smiles crossed the lips of both Severus and Bellatrix at the sight of their three children standing together, the last time the five of them would see each other until the children crossed over years upon years later, the two disappearing before the eyes of their beloved babies.
"Never let me go Severus," Bellatrix whispered as he took her hand and she entwined her fingers with his as the light surrounded them at long last, her eyes meeting his but there was no fear in her whatsoever, because she with him at long last and nothing could part them again.
"It's a promise," Severus whispered, kissing her lips as they entered their eternity together at long last.