Authors note: Trigger warning for cutting, eating disorders, and depression. I don't own Scars to Your Beautiful by Alessia Cara. Enjoy :)
She just wants to be beautiful
How many times over the years had Yaten watched Seiya cry over her insecurities? Too many. Way too many times. Too many times she'd held her leader in her arms, letting her soak her top with her tears. She'd stroke her hair and tell her that she's beautiful but she never listened. She should have given up on her by now but she can't. She'll stop trying the day she dies.
She goes unnoticed, she knows no limits
When they were little kids, they had gone to the same elementary school. It was a private school close to the palace that not too many kids went to. It was the perfect place for the starlights because it was walking distance to the palace, so their moms wouldn't have to worry about taking them to and from school and they could continue guarding the palace, plus it kept a low profile so they didn't have to worry about paparazzi harassing them constantly while they were at school.
Her and Taiki were Seiya's only friends. All the other kids ignored her even when she tried to talk to them or join in on one of their games. One day one of the girls got sick of her hanging around and told her that if she cut her hair then they'd talk to her.
Yaten knew that they weren't serious but Seiya obviously didn't, as she watched her take a pair of scissors to her long black hair and cut it so short, that it rested just above her ears. All of the other kids laughed like crazy and the humiliated starlight ran off sobbing.
The silver haired girl ran after her and found her in the bathroom. She had locked herself in a stall and wouldn't come out. Yaten was fine with that. She sat on the floor against the wall silently until Seiya finally came out.
It took her months for her hair to grow back but the scars never truly faded.
She craves attention, she praises an image
Seiya just wanted someone to love her so that's why whenever someone showed her even a little bit of affection, she latched on, desperate for some kind of love and approval. Yaten had seen her with so many different people throughout the years. Boy or girl, it didn't matter. Hell Seiya would date a tree if it told her it loved her. The problem was she always wound up with the wrong person. None of them were genuine. They'd all sweet talk her and she'd do anything they asked her to and they'd ditch her, leaving her heartbroken and wondering what the hell was wrong with her.
Yaten would always tell her that it wasn't her fault and that they were just jerks that couldn't see how wonderful she truly was. Seiya never believed her though. She always thought that maybe if she changed her hair or lost a little bit more weight, or acted a certain way that she'd get approval then. Yaten knew that wasn't the case.
It was frustrating how blind Seiya could be when it came to all this. She tried not to lose her cool with her but sometimes it failed. Like on Earth when Seiya was in love with sailor moon, she had gone so far as to say "Well maybe if I stayed here in this male form, she'd love me." and Yaten totally lost it.
She started screaming at her and wound up storming off to some abandoned graveyard where she fell asleep on a bench. When she woke up, she remembered everything from the night before and immediately rushed back to the place they were staying at only to find that Seiya had locked herself in her room.
She spent over an hour trying to get Seiya to come out of her room but that failed. She eventually came out though and the two sat in awkward silence for a bit before Yaten apologized.
The leader of the starlights just kinda gave her a small nod and that was it. But although she was silent Yaten knew that she was thinking up ways of what she could change next.
She prays to be sculpted by the sculptor
One time Yaten had walked in on Seiya in her underwear in her room. She was staring at her reflection in the mirror, touching her stomach and muttering to herself that it wasn't flat enough, grabbing her breasts and muttering that they were too small, touching her thighs and muttering that they resembled tree trunks.
She screamed when she saw Yaten standing there. "Get out!" she had yelled, as her hands desperately tried to cover her exposed body.
But Yaten just shook her head and walked towards her. Seiya tried to shove her away but she just grabbed her hand instead and squeezed it tightly. "Look at me." she demanded. Seiya lifted her angry gaze up and their eyes met. "You're not fat ok? So stop saying you are."she said softly, as she loosened her grip on her hand.
Her leader sighed and pulled her eyes away from hers. "Quit lying to me Yaten." she mumbled.
The silver haired girl cocked her head and gave her hand another gentle squeeze. "I'm not lying Seiya."
"You're not like this with anyone else though."
"Exactly so you should believe me."
Seiya sighed again and pulled her hand away. "Leave my room." she said quietly, as she walked back towards her mirror.
Yaten shook her head and did as told. As she shut the door behind her she could hear quiet muttering on the other side of the door.
She didn't show up to supper that night, leaving one empty chair at their long table. Taiki gave her a look as if to ask where she was, and Yaten just shrugged in return. She spotted her afterwards when she went for a stroll in the garden though. She had her sailor fuku on and was running laps around the garden. She didn't notice Yaten there though. The silver haired girl just softly shook her head and went back inside the palace.
Oh she don't see the light that's shining
The two girls very rarely got along except for the times when Seiya was upset but there were also some days where they acted like best friends. This day the two of them had gotten tickets to a festival that was happening in the center of Kinmoku. They had gotten the day off guarding the palace and planned on spending the day together.
Yaten actually enjoyed herself and constantly found herself laughing at Seiya's jokes. It was times like this where her leader practically radiated happiness and joy, and you can't help but smile when you see her. She just wished that she herself could see how amazing she truly was.
She was shaken out of her thoughts when a large teddy bear with a pink bow around it's neck, appeared in her face. Seiya popped her head out from behind it and laughed, telling her that she'd won it for her. Yaten gave her a small smile and took the bear hugging it close to her as she watched her friend prance around. "If only you saw what I saw." she whispered quietly, gripping the bear a little bit tighter.
Deeper than the eyes can find it
Yaten had been fast asleep in her bed when a knock at her door woke her up. She groaned and sat up in her bed, slowly turning to look at her alarm clock. "It's midnight. Who the hell is knocking at my door?" she muttered sourly to herself, as she dragged herself out of bed and to the door. She pulled open the door and was greeted by Seiya who had obviously been crying. Her face softened and she gestured for her to come in. "Seiya what happened?" she asked softly as she closed the door shut.
Seiya sniffled and shut her eyes as she spoke. "Well I just was on my date with Eri."
The sleepy starlight cocked her head at her. "I don't understand. Isn't that a good thing?"
"Well I mean I guess but the thing is she..." she started but stopped herself halfway.
"Seiya what did she do?"
"She broke up with me Yaten." she whispered, as fresh tears began to fall. "She told me I was too fat and that I was annoying and she doesn't want us to keep seeing each other."
Yaten's hands tightened into fists and she could feel her whole body filling with rage. "That bitch!" she yelled. "If I ever see her in person, I swear to God I will rip her head off and I will show no mercy!"
"Yaten please don't. I still love her, I don't want her to be in pain."
"Seiya she deserves to be in pain. If she can't see how wonderful you are then she's an idiot. You deserve better."
The other girl shrugged and cast her gaze towards the floor as she kicked her foot at an invisible pebble. "Not true." she muttered.
Yaten just sighed in frustration and stood up on her tiptoes, encircling her arms around Seiya's neck. "God you're stubborn."
Her leader didn't say anything and tightly wrapped her arms around her waist. "Please don't leave me right now. I need somebody to stay with me." she pleaded, as her sobs began to take over her.
"Of course I'll stay." Yaten said back, tightening her grip as well. "And I'm not going to leave you. Not now, not ever, I promise."
"Arigatou."
The two stayed like that for a while before they both started yawning. They let go and Yaten climbed back into her bed before motioning for Seiya to come as well. She did as instructed and laid down beside her, falling asleep almost instantly. Yaten smiled at the sleeping girl and kissed her gently on the cheek. "She doesn't deserve you Seiya." she whispered before she fell asleep.
Maybe we have made her blind
"Ooh Yaten, the gym in the center of town is advertising a deal on memberships there. Do you think I should join?" Seiya asked excitedly, as she read from the paper that had just been delivered to the palace.
Yaten wanted to scream no at her, that she was fine the way she was, that the training she had here was more then enough but she found herself shrugging. "I don't care. Do what you want."
Seiya smiled. "I'm going to head down there tonight then and sign up for a membership."
Shit Yaten thought to herself.
After that most of Seiya's evenings were spent at the gym, and Yaten would stay back at the palace regretting that she hadn't tried to stop her.
So she tries to cover up her pain, and cut her woes away
She had seen Seiya cutting herself before. Once was when they were still on Earth and Seiya had been home alone for a bit. Yaten had come back from whatever she had been doing and found Seiya in the middle of the living room floor with cuts running up her arms.
Once she was spotted, Seiya immediately tried to pull her sleeves back down but it was too late. Yaten had already grabbed her blade and tossed it and was rummaging through the kitchen grabbing every knife, fork, glass plate or cup and throwing it all out.
Her leader stormed off to her room and locked her door shut, refusing to come out again.
Yaten just huffed and grabbed the phone in the kitchen and dialed Taiki asking her to pick up some plastic utensils and plates. Once she hung up, she collapsed on the floor and started sobbing. She could feel Seiya's pain and sorrow and it hurt. She just wanted to help her but she was failing and she hated herself for it.
Cause covergirls don't cry after their face is made
So many times Seiya would put on a fake smile and nobody would suspect a thing. Except Yaten. She could feel all her emotions, every last one of them. And once evening was there she'd wander up to her room and knock on the door, and she'd answer and she'd tackle her with a hug. And when morning came nobody else suspected a thing.
But there's a hope that's waiting for you in the dark
"Healer do you think I'll ever find love?" Fighter asked sadly as she stood still at her post, her blue eyes focused on the ground in front of her.
"Of course. You're a wonderful person, someone will come along one day and treat you the way you deserve."
"Are you sure?"
"Of course I am."
"But you don't know that for sure."
"Yes I do."
"How?"
"Because I already love you." she whispered, quiet enough so that Fighter wouldn't hear her.
"What did you say?"
"I said because I know so."
"Oh."
You should know you're beautiful just the way you are
The boutique was silent except for the sound of Yaten impatiently tapping her foot against the hard floor. Suddenly a loud woosh caught her attention and she turned around to see Seiya standing there wearing a navy blue mini dress.
"So how do I look?" she asked shyly.
"It looks amazing on you Seiya."
"Really?" she asked in disbelief, as she turned to look at her reflection. "I think it just makes me look even fatter."
Yaten sighed. "Seiya how many times do I have to tell you this? You're not fat. You look great."
"Do you really think so?"
"Hai."
Seiya eyed her reflection in the mirror for a little while longer and let out a small sigh. "Fine I guess I'll get it." she said as she went back into the dressing room. She paid for it when she came out and the two girls walked back to the palace.
The dress got tossed in her closet and she never wore it. No matter how many times Yaten tried to reassure her that she looked great in it, she didn't believe her and so it stayed there among other clothes she'd never wear.
And you don't have to change a thing
It was the morning after Seiya had been dumped by Eri and she was already acting differently. She wouldn't smile, wouldn't make any jokes, would only talk about serious subjects, was hardly eating and so many more things. She didn't even seem like Seiya anymore.
"Seiya quit trying to change yourself! You're already good enough the way you are!" Yaten snapped after she had tried to crack a joke and Seiya had turned it into a lecture.
"I'm not good enough for Eri though..."
Yaten could feel the rage building up inside of her and her head felt like it was going to explode. "Eri is a bitch Seiya! She doesn't deserve you! She's an arrogant asshole who can't accept anyone that doesn't meet her standards which by the way happen to be impossible!" she screamed, her cheeks now burning red and her heart thumping loudly in her ears.
Her leader stood up and Yaten could see the anger in her eyes. "Don't ever talk about Eri that way." she said through gritted teeth.
"Seiya she broke your heart into a million pieces and yet you're still defending her? It's fine if you can't move on right away but don't try and justify the way she treated you!" she yelled, her own eyes filling with tears at her leader's stubbornness.
"Just leave me alone Yaten." Seiya muttered before storming off to her own room.
Yaten felt her knees give way once she left and she soon found herself on the floor of the palace's kitchen. She found herself sobbing uncontrollably and for what purpose? She didn't cry over anyone else but yet for some reason Seiya was different and she was willing to be as vulnerable as possible with her if that's what it took.
Taiki eventually found her on the floor and sighed, picking her up in her arms. She knew how much she cared about Seiya and how frustrating it was for her when Seiya still refused to see how wonderful she was. "It's ok Yaten." she whispered softly, as she stroked her back. "It's ok."
The world could change it's heart
It honestly still surprised Yaten that Seiya couldn't see that their world was just an awful place full of mean people and that it wasn't all her fault. She thought that after all the crimes and bullies she'd seen, that something might have clicked but nope. She put all the blame on herself for every last thing and nobody could convince her that it wasn't her fault. But yet Yaten kept trying even though it was killing her every step of the way but she wouldn't stop until Seiya loved herself.
No scars to your beautiful, we're stars and we're beautiful
"Yaten?"
The silver haired girl looked up from across the table. "Hai Seiya?" she asked, as she stirred her spoon in her cup of coffee.
"Can I ask you a question?"
"Of course."
Her leader's blue eyes darted around the room before she glanced down at her arms. She sighed. "Do you think that it's possible for anyone to love me? Even with the scars on my arms?" she asked quietly.
Yaten let go of her spoon and stood up, walking towards the other end of the table. She knelt down beside Seiya and grabbed her hands in her own. She then pushed up the other girl's sleeves to reveal slightly faded pink scars that reached up to her elbows. "Of course." she said softly, as her hand gently stroked one of Seiya's arms. "These scars don't affect whether or not somebody will love you."
"You don't know that though." the other girl whispered sadly, her eyes filling with tears.
"Yes I do."
"How?" Seiya yelled through her tears. "How do you know that someone will think I'm good enough? That someone will actually want to be with me? If you're so sure then how do you know?"
"Because I already love you Seiya." she said softly, still stroking her arm gently.
"Nani?" Seiya asked in disbelief, her eyes wide with shock. "This is a prank right?"
Yaten shook her head. "No it's not. Ashiteru."
"You mean as a friend right?" the other girl asked, still refusing to accept what she was hearing.
The silver haired girl rolled her eyes and kissed her on the lips softly before pulling away. "What do I have to do to make you believe me?"
"Stay by my side. Onegai." Seiya pleaded, her blue eyes still filled with tears. "And if this is a joke then please stop. But if you're serious, please stay."
"Of course." Yaten answered before planting another kiss on her lips, and this time Seiya kissed back, wrapping her arms around her waist tightly, clinging to the sudden affection she was receiving. And Yaten was willing to keep giving more.
She has dreams to be an envy, so she's starving
Another day passed by and Yaten still hadn't seen one bite of food reach her friend's mouth. She knew that Seiya had bad self esteem but she had prayed that she wouldn't get to this point but she had. She had been diagnosed with anorexia a few months ago and she claimed that she'd been trying to recover but that was obviously bullshit.
Sighing, she went into the fridge and grabbed some fruit and tossed it into a bowl. She grabbed a glass from their cupboard and filled it with water. She wanted her to eat something at the very least.
She slowly walked upstairs with the bowl of fruit in one hand and a glass of water in the other. She reached Seiya's room and tried to knock on the door with the back of her hand. The door slowly opened and she was greeted by Sailor Star Fighter who was about to go to her post. She extended the fruit and water to her and gave her a small smile. "I know you have to go to your post right away but please at the very least eat this when you get the chance."
Fighter examined the fruit with a nervous expression. "Ok." she muttered, taking the bowl and glass of water and setting them down on her dresser.
Yaten nodded and then left to go to the palace's library to read for a bit. A few hours later she went to throw something in the trash and noticed a bunch of fruit scattered among the other garbage. "Oh Seiya." she said sadly, as she walked away.
You know "Covergirls eat nothing"
Back on Earth during one of their photo shoots, they had had another model come and join them. Her name was Aina and she was very well known. She had a petite slender body and looks that any girl would kill for.
She annoyed the hell out of Yaten and was a total bitch to everyone on set. But it was during one of their breaks when she really blew it.
There had been trays of food set out by the staff for them to help themselves to and Seiya had grabbed a plate of food when all of a sudden she heard a scoff from behind her. There stood the she devil herself, flipping her blonde curls as she examined the food on the plate. "You're really going to eat all of that?" she asked in disgust. "I would never dream of even eating a bite of that disgusting garbage. Us covergirls eat nothing."
Seiya's eyes filled with tears as she had stood up in shame and tossed her plate of food in the trash.
Yaten had heard everything and had gone up to Aina and slapped her hard. The starlights were almost sued for that one but Yaten didn't care. All she cared about was the fact that now Seiya had one more thing to obsess about and destroy herself over.
She says "Beauty is pain and there's beauty in everything"
Yaten had confronted Seiya after the fruit incident and tried to talk to her but she wouldn't listen. So she got Kakyuu to force Seiya to eat dinner. Seiya did but Yaten could tell that she was choking down every bite and that she secretly hated her.
She found her in the bathroom right after supper, her fingers shoved down her throat as she forced herself to puke everything up. She cried in Yaten's arms for almost an hour when she was found, and even though Yaten knew she should be mad she just couldn't be.
"If I'm in pain will I be beautiful then?" Seiya asked meekly into her friend's chest.
The silver haired girl sighed and rested her head on top of hers. "You're already beautiful Seiya." she whispered.
"What's a little bit of hunger?"
It was their first date and Yaten had chosen to go to a fancy restaurant in the heart of Kinmoku. Seiya had hesitantly agreed to go even though Yaten could tell how nervous she was about going out to eat.
A waitor came by to take their order and Yaten asked for the salmon dinner. Seiya only asked for a glass of water. When Yaten asked her why, her response was "What's a little bit of hunger?"
She wanted to slap Seiya right then and there. She wanted to storm out of the restaurant but she didn't. Instead she made Seiya share her meal with her when it came along. She even had to feed Seiya herself in a couple of moments but she still kept going. She was the only one she'd ever be this patient with. She was her exception to her usual bitterness and crankiness.
They finished the evening by watching birds in a local park, and watching as the sky turned to black. And the best part of all? She even got to see a real smile from Seiya.
"I could go a little while longer" she fades away
At the worst point of Seiya's battle with her eating disorder, Yaten remembered her always muttering "I just need to hang in there. I could go a little while longer." She wound up under the care of the palace nurses after she became as thin as a skeleton. And yet Yaten would spend every minute she wasn't on post with her, talking to her, trying to make her smile, hoping that maybe her message would finally reach her, but it never did.
She don't see her perfect, she don't understand she's worth it
It was their one year anniversary and Yaten had spent all week trying to make arrangements. She'd make a nice supper for them at the palace and then she'd give her a gift and then they'd do whatever they wanted for the rest of the evening. She thought her plan was perfect.
She slid a small note under Seiya's door telling her to dress nice and to come downstairs at 7 PM. She did her own hair up in a bun and put on her favorite black mini dress along with a pair of high heels. She rushed back downstairs to finish cooking their dinner. As she was stirring the noodles in the pot, she heard movement behind her.
"What's all this?"
She spun around and took in her appearance. Long black hair curled neatly, short white dress with long black cardigan and black flats. "Happy anniversary." she said sweetly.
"Yaten I..." Seiya began as her eyes began to well up with tears.
Yaten turned back around and poured the spaghetti sauce in with the noodles. "No need to thank me." she said, grabbing the pot of spaghetti and walking over to the table she'd set up, placing a little bit of spaghetti on each plate. She placed the pot back on the stove and went to sit back down. "Come sit."
Seiya did as asked and sat down at the other end of the table. "Arigatou."
"Here, I got you this as well." Yaten said, pulling out a small gift box from underneath the table.
Her partner gasped as she took the box and carefully opened it, pulling out a gold chain with a golden heart. Tears began spilling down her cheeks and she began to protest. "Yaten thank you but I honestly don't deserve this." she said as she tried to hand it back to her.
Yaten shook her head and pushed the gift box back. "No you do deserve it and I want you to have it."
"Arigatou."
Yaten knew that Seiya didn't believe her but at least she was keeping it.
After dinner was over Seiya kissed her goodnight and they each went to their own rooms. When Yaten entered hers she found a bouquet of 12 roses sitting beside her bed attached with a small note.
Happy one year anniversary Yaten! Thank you for always putting up with me. Ashiteru - Seiya
She smiled at it and threw her shoes on the ground, flopping down on her bed beside the bouquet of roses. She stared at them until she fell asleep.
Or that beauty goes deeper then the surface
As far back as Yaten could remember, Seiya had always struggled with her self esteem. Even when they were little kids she was always obsessed with trying to fit in and that never changed. But yet she still loved her. Because even through all her flaws and all her insecurities, she had a heart of gold and was the most amazing person she'd ever met. But she knew that in Seiya's eyes that didn't count even though she wished it did.
So to all the girls that's hurting
She had come with Seiya to her very first group therapy for her eating disorder. So many other girls were there telling their stories and she just wanted to yell at them that they were beautiful and that they didn't need to starve themselves or make themselves throw up. But she knew it didn't work that way.
She held Seiya's hand as she spoke and every now and then she'd give a small reassuring squeeze, just to remind her that she wasn't totally alone in all of this hell.
And eventually she did recover, but not until after she'd fought through an entire world war with her brain.
Let me be your mirror, help you see a little bit clearer
The couple had been fighting again and Seiya was almost at her breaking point. "So if you know so much then, then tell me how I'm 'so beautiful'. Tell me what I'm not seeing when I look in the mirror since you obviously know best." she barked.
"Where do I begin Seiya? Your eyes are the prettiest shade of midnight blue, your smile can light up a whole room, your hair is always shiny and looks perfect even when you haven't showered in a week. Any girl would kill to have a body as tiny as yours, and besides all that you're beautiful on the inside as well." she said, all in one breath, praying that maybe just maybe Seiya would listen to her.
The raven haired girl went quiet and her gaze fell to the floor. "How do I know you're not lying?" she asked quietly.
Yaten sighed. "Seiya you're the only person I put up with. Even though you can be annoying as hell and some days I want to rip your head off and burn it, I still put up with you because I love you. And I don't lie to a person I love. Please believe me." she pleaded.
Seiya walked over to her and embraced her in her arms. "I'll try." she said quietly.
The light that shines within
Seiya had always loved to sing. You could often find her standing at her post, singing away to pass the time. So when the three lights wound up on Earth, she adored being on stage. She hated the reason why they were on Earth but she loved being on stage and singing her heart out, then hearing applause and screams of joy. It made her feel validated.
So many times Yaten had found her bouncing around the castle singing a tune and although she'd usually respond with a snarky comment or an eye roll, she secretly loved seeing Seiya so happy and carefree. She treasured those moments and kept them close to her heart.
There's a hope that's waiting for you in the dark
After they had been dating for three years, Seiya finally proposed. Her and Maker had been guarding the front entrance when all of a sudden princess Kakyuu ran outside, looking frantic and told Healer that there was an emergency inside.
Healer's heart started beating rapidly as she began worrying about Seiya and she ran inside praying that she was alright.
Kakyuu lead her to the library where Seiya was sprawled out on the floor. Healer immediately started crying and fell to the floor. "Seiya! Seiya!" she cried.
Just then Seiya started to sit up and began to speak. "Healer, I need you to do something for me." she said weakly.
"Anything Seiya!" she said, trying to choke back her tears as she leaned in closer to her.
Then the raven haired girl sat straight up and pulled out a small box. "Will you marry me?" she asked, with her usual cocky grin on her face.
Healer's expression turned sour and she slapped her. "Baka!" she yelled, getting up and walking away. "I hate you!"
Seiya sighed and sadly put the box away in her back pocket. She was about to leave when Healer walked back in the room.
"Oh and yes I'll marry you, you jerk." she said bitterly, before storming off again.
You should know you're beautiful just the way you are
The soon to be married couple was out wedding dress shopping and it was Seiya's turn to try on dresses.
"I don't know Yaten." she said as she examined the dresses. "I don't think any of these will look good on me."
Yaten groaned. "Seiya how many times do I have to say this? You're already beautiful. You'd look great in any of these dresses."
Her fiance shook her head and turned back to the rows of dresses. "I still don't know. I mean I don't want one that shows off how fat I am, so maybe a ball gown." she muttered, as she grabbed hold of a white ball gown with sparkles along the neckline.
"Stop that Seiya!" Yaten yelled, getting frustrated. She examined the dresses and pulled out a dress and handed it to Seiya. "Put this on." she demanded.
"But Yaten I-"
"No buts Seiya. Now go try it on." she said, pushing her towards the changing room.
"Fine." Seiya muttered, closing the curtain shut behind her. When she came out she was wearing a long white wedding gown that hugged her curves nicely. It had a heart neckline and it was sleeveless plus it had a rhinestone belt around her waist.
Yaten gasped when she saw her. "Seiya that dress looks amazing on you!" she exclaimed, as her eyes traveled all over her body.
"Do you really think so?" Seiya asked shyly, her cheeks beet red as she looked in the mirror.
"Of course."
"I think I'm going to get it."
And you don't have to change a thing
It was another one of those nights again. Seiya had just gone through another break up and had wound up at Yaten's door crying, now here she was asleep in her bed, wrapped up in Yaten's arms.
The still half awake Yaten gently stroked her hair as she slept, tightening her grip ever so slightly on her. "It's not your fault Seiya." she whispered to the sleeping girl in her arms. But she knows that when she wakes up in the morning she'll be crying again and blaming herself.
The world could change it's heart
After their fight with Galaxia, Seiya had spent months blaming herself and apologizing to princess Kakyuu. Everyday she was trying to make up for it again. Everyday she blamed herself for what Galaxia did and even though Kakyuu always told her it wasn't her fault, she still kept going.
Yaten fought with her so much over it. No matter how much she yelled and no matter what she said, Seiya never believed her and would wind up locking herself in her room.
No scars to your beautiful, we're stars and we're beautiful
The door slammed shut. Yaten looked up from the couch, seeing Seiya standing at the doorway, her red suit drenched with rain, her black hair wet and sticking to her head. "I'm not good enough Yaten." she choked out, before collapsing on the floor. "I'm not good enough for Odango."
Yaten sighed and walked over to her soaking wet friend. "Gomenasai Seiya." she said softly, as she held her in her arms. As frustrated as she was with Seiya that she still was in love with Usagi, she couldn't help but feel bad for her. So she held her in her arms while she cried, for as long as she needed. "You're good enough for me." she whispered to the crying girl but she knew it didn't register. She could feel her heart breaking more and more with every tear that fell, and there was nothing she could do to put it back together.
No better you then the you that you are
Seiya had tried to pull another one of her stupid pranks again and the end result was a soaking wet Yaten. "I fucking hate you Seiya!" she yelled as she stormed up to her room to change her clothes. She slammed the door shut behind her and peeled off her clothes, throwing them on the floor as she grabbed new clothes to put on. "Stupid Seiya." she muttered under her breath. But she knew deep down that even though Seiya annoyed the living hell out of her, it was little things like this that was what made her so special and she wouldn't change her for the world.
After she'd put on a fresh pair of clothes, she went back downstairs where she was greeted by a sheepish looking Seiya. "Gomenasai Yaten." she said meekly, her cheeks bright red. "I just wanted to make you smile."
Yaten sighed. "I hate you so much." she mumbled. "I forgive you this time, just don't do it again unless you'd like your head ripped off." she threatened, her voice stern, as she walked away.
No better life then the life we're living
The two women stood side by side at their post, occasionally sending a quick glance the other's way. Life had been good lately. There hadn't been any issues at the palace in months, and the couple had just gotten married the month previous. Plus on top of all that, Fighter's self esteem issues had slowly been improving and she had been more confidant and cocky lately.
Once their shift was over, Fighter immediately turned to Healer and lifted her up in her arms, earning her screams of protest. "Fighter put me down!"
Fighter giggled and pulled her closer, burying her face in her silver hair. "Nah I don't feel like it."
"Fighter I swear to God if you don't put me down this instant, you'll have a star sensitive inferno coming your way very shortly." the shorter women threatened.
The raven haired starlight tightened her grip on her and pulled away slightly so that the two were face to face, Healer still in her arms. "You love me too much to hurt me."
Healer scoffed. "Who said that I love you?"
Her wife faked a pouty face and pretended to cry. "You're mean." she whined, putting the other starlight down on the ground.
Healer rolled her eyes and quickly pecked her on the cheek. "Baka." she muttered, as she walked back inside the palace.
No better time for your shine, you're a star
It had never really surprised Healer that Fighter was the leader of the three of them. She always tried to be an optimist and tried to see the best in everyone. She was so passionate about everything she did and even through all her self esteem issues, she made an amazing leader.
She shone so brightly in everything she did that it blinded people and people would take advantage of her because they wanted some of her shine for themselves. But even after everything she'd been through, she always managed to have the biggest smile out of everyone in a room, even though behind closed doors she was always breaking down.
Healer prayed that Fighter's shine never went out because she knew that she herself would be lost without it.
Oh you're beautiful, oh you're beautiful
She had looked so gorgeous on their wedding day. Her dress fitted her perfectly, her raven black hair done up in a bun, a long white veil, ruby red lipstick, she looked like a star. Yaten herself had settled for a basic white ball gown and just a simple veil and makeup, her hair just done up in it's normal ponytail.
Walking down the aisle and up to her had been some of the most nerve wracking moments of her life. When she finally got up there and was able to look into her eyes, and hold her hands while she slid her ring on her finger was bliss.
Seiya had started crying in only a matter of minutes and she could barely say her vows through her tears. Just seeing Seiya cry was enough to make Yaten tear up. They both said I do and then they kissed, officially wife and wife for the first time.
It was the happiest day of both of their lives.
There's a hope that's waiting for you in the dark
Three years had passed they'd gotten married and the couple had begun trying to conceive a child through in vitro about a year ago but so far they hadn't had very much luck. Today was Seiya's 24th birthday and Yaten had spent all day trying to make sure everything was in place.
She'd had Taiki bake a cake while she cooked burgers for supper, as she remembered that they'd always been a favorite of Seiyas. She reached a hand into the pocket of her sweater and made sure that her present was still there. She felt the small shape of a box and let out a small sigh of relief.
She grabbed the tray of burgers and carried it into the ballroom where Seiya's surprise party was being held. She set it down on the table where Kakyuu approached her. "Taiki's already gone to get Seiya?" she asked softly.
Yaten nodded. "Hai." she said. "Do you think she'll like her present?" she asked nervously, fidgeting with a loose strand of hair that had come out of her ponytail.
Kakyuu smiled and placed a hand reassuringly on her shoulder. "I'm sure she'll love it Yaten. Don't worry." she said softly.
The starlight took a deep breath and tried to smile. "I guess you're probably right. Arigatou hime."
All of a sudden Taiki came bursting through the doors. "Ok everyone get into place! Seiya's on her way!" she shouted, as everyone frantically rushed into one giant cluster of bodies.
The doors opened again and in came Seiya who was greeted by a chorus of "Happy birthday!"
Her eyes began to water as she looked around at everyone. "A-arigatou." she stuttered, overwhelmed with joy.
Yaten slowly walked up to her and nervously pulled the small box out of her pocket. "Happy birthday Seiya." she said as she handed her her present.
Seiya started to protest but Yaten made her open the present anyways. She pulled the top off and there sitting in the box was a pregnancy test with a pink plus sign in the middle. Her eyes started to water and she quickly scooped her wife up in her arms. "I'm going to be a mom!" she squealed.
Yaten laughed and hugged her back. "Happy birthday. Ashiteru."
"I love you too." Seiya said happily before kissing her on the lips.
You should know you're beautiful just the way you are
Yaten's head rested gently against the chest of her sleeping wife who was snoring lightly and whose arms were tightly wrapped around her. For once the reason she was in her arms wasn't because of heartbreak but out of love. She smiled and closed her eyes, listening to her heartbeat. "Never change Seiya." she whispered as she drifted off to sleep.
And you don't have to change a thing
"Yaten?"
"Hai Seiya?" Yaten responded, looking up at her girlfriend who was sitting on her bedroom floor.
"Would you love me more if I stayed in my male form?"
The silver haired girl sighed in frustration. "Seiya how many times do I need to tell you that you're perfect the way you are. I like you for who you are." she said for what felt like the millionth time.
"I know but you've only ever dated guys before and I'm not a guy so if I stayed in that form would you love me more?"
"No of course not!" Yaten shouted. "Seiya just because you're the first girl I've ever been with doesn't mean I love you less. Your male form isn't who you really are. It was a disguise. I love the way you are, why can't you see that?" she yelled, tears spilling down her own cheeks out of frustration.
Seiya got up and walked over towards her. "Gomenasai Yaten. I'm just scared of losing you." she said softly as she reached out to wipe her tears away.
Yaten sighed. "I know you are. It's just frustrating that no matter how many times I try and tell you that you're good enough, you don't listen."
"Gomen. I don't mean to be so difficult." Seiya replied, pulling her hand away.
"It's not your fault." Yaten said, standing up on her tiptoes.
"Yes it i-" Seiya started but Yaten cut her off with a kiss.
"Just shut up and let me love you." she barked before kissing her again.
The world could change it's heart
The world was always going to be filled with evil people and that was something Seiya had to accept over time. She had to accept the fact that even though she wasn't perfect, not everything was her fault. There were still times when she'd slip up and say something negative about herself and every time Yaten was right there to correct her. But she was slowly getting better day by day and that's what mattered.
No scars to your beautiful, we're stars and we're beautiful
"Mommy! Mommy!"
Yaten looked up at the silver haired girl running towards her. "What is it Keiko?" she asked her 8 year old daughter.
The little girl pulled out a red rose from behind her back. "Mom and Haruna helped me pick this out for you." she said holding out the flower.
The older starlight smiled and took the flower. "Arigatou Keiko." she said as she gave her daughter a peck on the cheek.
"Yaten!"She looked back up and saw her wife running towards her holding Keiko's twin sister in her arms. She had a goofy grin on her face as she ran towards her, setting Haruna down on the ground. She kissed her wife on her forehead which earned her a sarcastic groan.
She sat down beside her and the two watched their daughters play together. Keiko was the eldest of the two and she was the next sailor star healer. She had long silver hair and Seiya's blue eyes where as Haruna was the next sailor star fighter and she had long black hair as well as Yaten's lime green eyes.
"Look how far you've made it Seiya." Yaten said softly, resting her head on her wife's shoulder.
Seiya let out a small chuckle. " I never thought I would've lasted this long. Thank you for never leaving me."
"Baka." Yaten said jokingly as she reached up to give her wife a kiss on the lips.
"Mommy come play!" Keiko yelled out.
The oldest women laughed and stood up, kissing Seiya on top of her head. "I guess I should go. Ashiteru."
Seiya smiled back. "I love you too Yaten, forever and always."
"Promise?"
"Of course."