Rocky Horror, a victorious fanfic

My friends and I watched Rocky Horror for Halloween, and this came to mind halfway through. It's written as dialogue, but the pattern is always the same to make it easier to understand who's talking; Cat always starts, and Jade always finishes. Enjoy!

"Ooh, can we get popcorn?"

"Cat, it's half-past eleven at night."

"But I like popcorn!"

"Yeah, and I like spending my Saturday night with anyone else but you."

"..."

"Stop pouting."

"..."

"Seriously, we're in public. And you're seventeen."

"..."

"Fine! You can have popcorn."

"Yay, thank you!"

"Stop hugging me."

"Hey Jadey, what do you think Rocky Horror is going to be like?"

"You've seen the movie."

"But this is cinema."

"We watched the film the other day. It's not going to be any different."

"But it's live."

"No, it isn't."

"Yes, it is! See, there's the actors, right over there!"

"Cat, they're people in costume. Like us."

"Ooh, should we get a picture with them?"

"No, we shouldn't."

"But he looks loads like Tim Curry. And you make a great Magenta."

"I can't believe I'm here. In costume. In public."

"But you look super pretty! And I'm awesome as Columbia. "Well, I was walking down the street just a-having a think, when a snake of a guy gave me an evil wink..""

"Cat. Cat."

"What?"

"Don't sing."

"But I love singing!"

"I can't believe I'm friends with you."

"Ooh, look, look! It's starting!"

"I know. I can see."

"..."

"Jade, Jade, Jade, look!"

"Look at what?"

"It's your lips!"

"My li-?"

"Yeah! Those are Magenta's lips!"

"Cat, I know. I've seen this film every Halloween since I turned nine."

"Phooey."

"..."

"Can I have some of that popcorn? I'd like to throw it at that guy dressed as Eddie who keeps making motorbike noises in the front row."

"We should have convinced Tori to dress up as Janet!"

"No, Cat. I don't want to see Vega in her underwear."

"Ooh, and Andre could be Brad.."

"I don't want to see him in his underwear either."

"And Robbie could be Frank-n-Furter.."

"I'd like to see that. Robbie as a transvestite. Haha."

"And Beck could be Rocky!"

"No. Beck is not walking around, in public, in gold Speedos."

"But he's attractive."

"..."

"Jade?"

"You're lucky you're small and cute."

"No, don't go in there!"

"Cat, be quiet. The whole cinema can hear you."

"But Wikipedia said people often join in."

"Yeah, but this isn't a horror movie. Just sing along if you need to join in."

"There's a light.."

"..."

"There's a light.."

"..."

"There's a light, light.."

"I'm not joining in. You can repeat the line as many times as you want, but I'm not joining in."

"Please?"

"No."

"Yay, it's us! Magenta and Columbia! Will you join in for this?"

"No."

"Please?"

"No."

"Why?"

"I don't like Magenta's lines in Time Warp."

"Come on, Jade. I mean, Magenta. It's starting.."

"..."

""Not for very much longer.""

"Yay!"

"..."

""And the void would be calling..""

""LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN!""

"Cat, please stop. Cat, no. Cat, get off the chair."

"That was so much fun!"

"You aren't meant to sexy tap-dance your way through Time Warp. It's a serious song."

"The boys at the front liked it."

"Oh God."

""How'd ya do, I see you've met my..""

"Cat, not Sweet Transvestite. Sing along with anything else, but not Sweet Transvestite."

"Phooey."

"..."

""I'M JUST A SWEET TRANSVESTITE!""

"Cat.."

""FROM TRANSSEXUAL, TRANSYLVANIA-A-A!""

"Sing along with one more thing, and I swear, I'm leaving."

"Awh, Eddie. Why did he have to die? I liked Eddie."

"He was only on-screen for, like, two minutes."

"He had such a good voice, though! And a motorcycle! I want a motorcycle."

"Didn't your brother have a motorcycle?"

"He did."

"But?"

"Well, we were on a bus and-"

"Tell me later."

"This show is super dirty."

"For the second time tonight, you're seventeen. And you've already seen this."

"What's that supposed to mean?!"

"..."

"Is Brad gay?"

"I guess. Just like Robbie."

"Robbie's not gay."

"He told Beck his jeans fit him nice."

"Oh.."

"See?"

"..."

"It's true, though. Beck's jeans do fit him nice."

"So true."

"Will you sing Touch-a, Touch-a with me?"

"Do I have too?"

"Please?"

"..."

"Magenta and Columbia's lines only."

""I was feeling done in.. couldn't win..""

"That's not Columbia's line."

"Fine."

"..."

""You mean she..?""

""Uh-huh.""

"..."

""More.""

"This is just wrong."

"Beck would make a such a good Rocky."

"He'd have to go blonde for the role."

"Beck would look good as a blonde."

"Mm."

"That's so gross. They were going to eat him!"

"It's like every horror film I've enjoyed."

"Jadey, you're scaring me."

"Be terrified. I'm wearing an apron."

"And a wig!"

"Which is pretty itchy. I'm going to take it off.."

"No!"

"Why not?"

"You'll ruin the illusion."

"What illusion? I'm a high school junior with an eyebrow ring in a maid's costume."

"But, costumes are so fun! And you said we could go trick-or-treating afterwards! They won't give us candy if you don't have a good costume."

"Fine."

"..."

"Cat, I'm not going to take you trick-or-treating at three in the morning. I lied."

"Ew."

"What's so disgusting? The orgy, or the fact that they're not wearing their costumes properly?"

"I just can't believe it."

"The actors did it on-screen."

"But did all of those dressed-up people really have to act it out? Right in front of the screen?"

"People are weird."

""SCIENCE FICTION!""

"Cat, really?"

"It's the end of the show! Join in!"

"Really?"

""DOUBLE FEATURE!""

""Ooh, ooh, ooh..""

"Awh, it's over!"

"Thank God. I can't handle having any more cigarettes stuck in my wig."

"People with afros have that all year."

"No wonder Andre has those braids."

"Jadey, can we do this again next year?"

"No."

"No?"

"No. Unless.."

"Unless..?"

"You can convince Tori to be the Brad to my Janet."

"You're a lesbian?"

"No, for the film!"

"Oh."

"..."

"I still think you're gay, though."

Reviews are always great!

Note: I didn't actually see the whole of Rocky Horror before writing this (the last time I saw it was on Halloween, and the last time I watched it fully was last year), so some parts may be wrong. Please correct me if this is the case!