Snape's song (Potter is a drip)
SNAPE
Good God above
This world is nuts
Why love a boy
Who just loves to strut?
Like Dad, like son
Potter I hate
This boy who lived's
Got me in a state.
Potter's a has-been
Potter's just a pill
He's not in Slytherin
So his worth is nil!
Potter is a drip
Potter is a rat
Potter's just a Gryffindor
Whose head's too fat.
Bloody little scum
Love to see him twitch
I hate Potter, Weasley
And that mudblood witch.
And he's got this awful talent
Out there on the Quidditch field
Other teachers think his fame is from
Hardships a ruddy shield!
Potter is a drip
Potter is a schmuck
Potter's just another kid
With too much luck.
Got his father's face
And his mother's eyes
But always his father
Do I recognize!
And he's got this damn Godfather
Who is just a royal prig
God, I'm bloody furious
Sirius wormed his way out of the brig!
SLYTHERINS
Potter is a drip
Makes us all look bad
SNAPE
And his potions average
Is rather sad
SLYTHERINS
Just another dumb
Old flash in the pan
DRACO
And he put my poor father
In Azkaban!
SNAPE
I remember when his father
Loved to get me oh, so pissed
Daddy got my anger
Mom, she got my rancor
I didn't rank her high upon my list.
Dear Dumbledore
That kid's a pain
Occlumency
Can go down the drain!
He's just a brat
From hell for me
That scum looked at my
Worst memory!
He may be our light
He may be our hope
But for me he's just blight
Oh, that bloody dope!
Potter is a drip
Who the dark lord fought
But, who cares when he
Looked at my private thoughts!
Just because I want
Voldemort in heck
Until Voldy's dead
I'll save that Potter's neck.
But no matter what you tell me,
My memories he so defiled.
DUMBLEDORE
Severus, you realize
That you are acting like a child!
SNAPE
Potter is a drip
Not worth half my time
I think he's a reprobate
Is that a crime?
Oh, that Umbridge hag
Might not be so dim
But I'm on Probation all
Because of him!
And his little fights with Voldy
Oh, good lord they're such a farce!
SLYTHERINS
All our dads he foiled!
Malfoy, Crabbe and Goyle
Toil to defeat his bloody arse!
SLYTHERINS
Potter is a drip
Makes us all look bad
SNAPE
And his potions average
Is rather sad
SLYTHERINS
Just another dumb
Old flash in the pan
DRACO
And he put my poor father
In Azkaban!
SNAPE
He's got no regard for order
Treats the schools rules like they're mold
His chaos never ceases
Order goes to pieces
Creases always end up in the fold.
DUMBLEDORE
I used to think
Snape was above the games
That used to be played by
Sirius Black and James...
Potter isn't bad
There are bad things he did
But lighten up now, Severus
He's just a kid!
Why, he's not that proud
Though he's insecure
As to breaking rules,
Some can't resist the lure.
What a cruel trick of nature
Put him in that muggle house
God knows how he lasted living
With old Dursley and his spouse!
SLYTHERINS AND SNAPE
Potter is a drip
Potter is a nut
Potter's just a loony
with a lightning cut!
Potter is a drip!
DUMBLEDORE
No, you've got it wrong!
It is all our mission
To guide him along.
Everybody vote for Potter!
SNAPE
The kid is on an ego trip!
DUMBLEDORE
Arrogant prick? What a laugh!
SLYTHERINS and SNAPE
We want to snap his wand in half!
SNAPE
But I'm still on his behalf despite the fact that he's a drip!
SNAPE
Good God above
This world is nuts
Why love a boy
Who just loves to strut?
Like Dad, like son
Potter I hate
This boy who lived's
Got me in a state.
Potter's a has-been
Potter's just a pill
He's not in Slytherin
So his worth is nil!
Potter is a drip
Potter is a rat
Potter's just a Gryffindor
Whose head's too fat.
Bloody little scum
Love to see him twitch
I hate Potter, Weasley
And that mudblood witch.
And he's got this awful talent
Out there on the Quidditch field
Other teachers think his fame is from
Hardships a ruddy shield!
Potter is a drip
Potter is a schmuck
Potter's just another kid
With too much luck.
Got his father's face
And his mother's eyes
But always his father
Do I recognize!
And he's got this damn Godfather
Who is just a royal prig
God, I'm bloody furious
Sirius wormed his way out of the brig!
SLYTHERINS
Potter is a drip
Makes us all look bad
SNAPE
And his potions average
Is rather sad
SLYTHERINS
Just another dumb
Old flash in the pan
DRACO
And he put my poor father
In Azkaban!
SNAPE
I remember when his father
Loved to get me oh, so pissed
Daddy got my anger
Mom, she got my rancor
I didn't rank her high upon my list.
Dear Dumbledore
That kid's a pain
Occlumency
Can go down the drain!
He's just a brat
From hell for me
That scum looked at my
Worst memory!
He may be our light
He may be our hope
But for me he's just blight
Oh, that bloody dope!
Potter is a drip
Who the dark lord fought
But, who cares when he
Looked at my private thoughts!
Just because I want
Voldemort in heck
Until Voldy's dead
I'll save that Potter's neck.
But no matter what you tell me,
My memories he so defiled.
DUMBLEDORE
Severus, you realize
That you are acting like a child!
SNAPE
Potter is a drip
Not worth half my time
I think he's a reprobate
Is that a crime?
Oh, that Umbridge hag
Might not be so dim
But I'm on Probation all
Because of him!
And his little fights with Voldy
Oh, good lord they're such a farce!
SLYTHERINS
All our dads he foiled!
Malfoy, Crabbe and Goyle
Toil to defeat his bloody arse!
SLYTHERINS
Potter is a drip
Makes us all look bad
SNAPE
And his potions average
Is rather sad
SLYTHERINS
Just another dumb
Old flash in the pan
DRACO
And he put my poor father
In Azkaban!
SNAPE
He's got no regard for order
Treats the schools rules like they're mold
His chaos never ceases
Order goes to pieces
Creases always end up in the fold.
DUMBLEDORE
I used to think
Snape was above the games
That used to be played by
Sirius Black and James...
Potter isn't bad
There are bad things he did
But lighten up now, Severus
He's just a kid!
Why, he's not that proud
Though he's insecure
As to breaking rules,
Some can't resist the lure.
What a cruel trick of nature
Put him in that muggle house
God knows how he lasted living
With old Dursley and his spouse!
SLYTHERINS AND SNAPE
Potter is a drip
Potter is a nut
Potter's just a loony
with a lightning cut!
Potter is a drip!
DUMBLEDORE
No, you've got it wrong!
It is all our mission
To guide him along.
Everybody vote for Potter!
SNAPE
The kid is on an ego trip!
DUMBLEDORE
Arrogant prick? What a laugh!
SLYTHERINS and SNAPE
We want to snap his wand in half!
SNAPE
But I'm still on his behalf despite the fact that he's a drip!