Read away and the character is not mine, by the way. Third fanfic, I hope I can post more stories in the future!
Was refusing to raise your boyfriend's flesh and blood from the other woman could be categorized as selfish?
Even though the child was accidentally conceived?
But do you love your partner enough to do it?
Love the child like your own?
I keep asking myself the same question for the last week. Now I know how simple thoughts could kill you, well, in my case, this thought, was anything but simple. Every time I even tried thinking about it, my mind went blank; I don't know anything anymore. I haven't eaten anything big except for simple foods that Alice and Rose bringing in turn to my apartment. Big meals made my stomach churned for some reason.
Oh, mother of all mother stupid fucking shit men did when their partner said they wanted a space or a 'breather' and not a fucking break-up; they got drunk and accidentally got someone, who is one of your own fucking friends, fucking pregnant. Yes, that's it.
"I couldn't let my own flesh and blood killed."
"Then let go of me." As much as it hurt me to said that, I had to.
"I can't!" he yelled and we were back to point zero.
He dropped this bomb last week... right after the said friend came to our apartment and told us she was two months pregnant. She said she didn't want anything to do with the baby, but she didn't have a heart to do an abortion, she said, and I quote 'can't do this to my own child' and I was like what the fuck? She didn't have a heart to do an abortion but ready to abandon the child by sign over her parental rights once the child was born.
So, I was keep asking myself this past week; was refused to took care of your boyfriend's now-then child was considered selfish?
The door opened again, the creak sound it made whenever someone came in was enough sign for me, I thought it was Alice but I was surprised to see him standing there. I glanced at him then looked away, it still hurt. Everything about him and the news was hurt.
"Rose and Alice said you couldn't hold big meals?" he made it sounds like question rather than a statement of fact.
"I can't eat." I told him simply, to the point, didn't have to elaborated that whenever a thoughts of baby came in to my mind, it instantly made me nauseous.
"You have to," he begged, "please, for me, I don't want you to get sick."
"Have you decide?" he let out a harsh breathe.
"We can discuss it that after this, please, you have to eat first."
"I said I can't." I shook my head.
"Bella..." his voice anguish.
"If you can't decide for us, let me do it," I stared at his sad green orbs, "leave me."
"No, I can't, that's impossible." He shook his head vigorously.
"Yes you can, I don't want you to pick between us and I don't want you to..." I choked, "I wouldn't let you abandon your own child, but I can't raise your child... it will always remind me of... of what happened and it's not good for everyone involved," I sighed, "I will resenting the child because I will always reminded by what happened and I will resent you too for it; for literally forcing me to accept your child. I can't live like that, as much as I love you; I refused to live like that."
"Bella, please, anything... anything but that! I can't... I can't live without you."
"Then find someone else, someone who willing to raise your child without resentment on their part."
Thank you for reading and review please then while you are at it also give me some thoughts of this fanfic baground problem; do you think what Bella did was right or downright stupid? This have been rolling around my head for a while.