AUTHORS NOTE READ
Everyone please read and review this! I spent a lot of time working on this and I really want some feedback so please take some time out of your busy schedule to review this!
Summary - After Ron's death, Harry is left with the task of be there for Hermione and never breaking Ginny heart but what happens when things get out of control? Please Read and Review! (I know you're saying shut - up but please!) All flamers are used to burn the Los Lonely Boys song 'Heaven.' (sorry to the fans!)
And Now Ashley Connor Proudly Presents:
She Will Be Loved In a hospital room, plain and still, Ron Weasley lay motionless. He was alive, yes, but he didn't have much time left. He was alone in the room as he was not to be disturbed. He met his fate with the oh so famous 'Whomping Willow Tree.' He was thrown into the tree by none other then You-Know-Who. He, as a best friend should, was trying to protect Harry. Ron was in front of Harry and got the full impact. They we both thrown backward and well . . . . they were both badly injured but Ron got the full beating. But this was not the point. Ron needed to see Harry . . . now. As soon as the mire thought of seeing Harry occurred, Harry, only Harry, walked through the door. "Ron?!" Harry asked and dashed to the bedside, "are you okay?" Harry seized Ron's hand. "I'm fine, for now," Ron said.
"Good, I thought that-"
"Harry," Ron silenced him, "I need you to promise me something,"
Harry confused, agreed.
"Anything,"
"Before I go-"
"You're not going any-"
"But if I do, I need you to do something for me," Ron said and a silence developed between them, "you know I love Hermione," Ron began and when Harry tried to comment, Ron stopped him as he needed all the time he could use, "she was one of the many things that kept me going. She's the light to my dark. Graceful, elegant, God I love her. And Ginny, my little sister. So shy, so brilliant. I was the only brother she said she could trust. I protected her. Harry, those two girls are the two most important girls in my life. You know that. You and Ginny have been together for only two months. Harry, I beg of you, do not break her heart,"
"Never," Harry vowed. "And as for Hermione, she can take care of herself and she'd kill me for saying this, but I want you to watch out for her. If she needs a shoulder to cry I want you to be there. I want you to fill the emptiness that I'll leave,"
"T-take your place?" Harry asked as Ron nodded, "Ron. I couldn't, she belongs to you,"
"Harry, I'm not asking you to marry her. I'm asking you to love her, that's all, make her feel loved," Ron said.
"I promise," Harry said.
"Thank you. And now, I have to leave you," Ron said kindly to Harry.
"No, Ron," Harry felt water in his eyes, "no you're not going anywhere. You're my best friend, and you're not going to die . . . . I won't let you," Harry said as Ron closed his eyes and his pale hand loosened it's grip and finally, all warmth had drained from him and Ron was gone. Harry stood up and took a moment to let out a sigh releasing the pain. Ron was gone, at age 19.
Harry walked down the hall to the elevator. He went from floor 15 to the first floor where the Weasley's and Hermione where all waiting. "Harry!" Mrs. Weasley said as she and everyone else stood up.
"Harry did you see him?" Someone asked.
"Is he okay?" he heard Hermione say.
"Let him breathe," Another piped up.
"I did speak to him," Harry said feeling a knot in his stomach, "and-" he was cut off, a doctor walked in the room.
"Excuse me everyone. Is this the family of Ronald Weasley?" he asked as everyone nodded except Harry, "Oh . . . well I'm sorry. . . . we did everything we could but . . . we lost him . . . I'm so sorry," the doctor said walking away.
Harry watched as Mr. and Mrs. Weasley found a little comfort in each others arms. Bill and Charlie stood together in the corner, shock on their faces. Fred and George gave grieving looks. Percy stood with Ginny though she looked to Harry. Then there was Hermione. She sat by the window looking outside solemnly. Ron's words ran though Harry's mind and in instinct, he walked over to Hermione.
"Hermione?" Harry asked.
Hermione looked up at him. Her eyes killed to look at. Then Harry remembered, once again, his promise to Ron, 'make her feel loved,' Harry then found himself with his arms locked around Hermione. He saw Ginny out of the corner of his eye looking at him in an uneasy way. But he vowed he'd always be there to help them, always.
Beauty queen of only eighteen
She had some trouble with herself
He was always there to help her
She always belonged to someone else
3 Years Later Harry drove along the road. Where he was going he had no idea. Finally after an hour, he pulled up to the cemetery where Ron was. He got out of the car, but didn't walk over right away. He flashed back to the hospital room, remembering how he promised to love Hermione and never break Ginny's heart. He hardly saw either of the two lately. Hermione hardly ever spoke anymore and Ginny . . . . well, he did see her but not in the same light as before. She spent a lot of time at the cemetery. Mostly talking to the stone as if Ron where still here, but he wasn't. And Harry was supposed to fill the empty spots, but he couldn't. He walked over and looked at the stone.
"I'm sorry, Ron," Harry said silently, "I should have done better. But how can I care for both of them when one spends all her time with you and the other hardly speaks? Ginny won't talk to me. I want to protect her but, she won't let me. Hermione . . I don't even see her much. What am I gonna do?" Harry asked and sat there a while. Then, after two hours, of silence, he got up and got back in the car. And he drove. No destination really. Just the road. Harry wasn't really thinking either. Just staring. Spaced-out. Then he came to a stop in front of Ginny's house. He knew she was there alone because her car was the only one in the driveway. Without thinking, he got out of the car and found himself at her door. Before he had a chance to knock or ring the doorbell, a strange wind blew it open. Harry walked in to find photo's of Ron scattered all around the floor. Ginny was still upset. Not that she shouldn't be, she just never thought of anything else. "Ginny?" Harry called.
"In here," she answered.
Harry walked into the kitchen to see Ginny looking out the window with the same expression Hermione had that day at the hospital.
"Hi," Harry said.
"Hi," Ginny said, not even bothering to look at Harry.
"I came here to talk to you,"
"I don't really want to talk now," Ginny answered, her eyes not leaving the window.
"But I do," Harry said, a little aggravated and demanding.
"About what?" Ginny finally turned around.
"Why don't we talk anymore?" Harry said, he could feel the pressure of the conversation rising.
"We talk," Ginny said.
"No, we barley speak. Our regular conversation includes four phrases at the most. 'Hello, no yes' and 'goodbye.'" Harry said, knowing an explosion was about to occur.
"I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU WANT!!!" Ginny yelled.
"What the bloody hell is that supposed to mean!?" Harry asked.
"Everytime I try to love you or think that we have some kind of chance of being something again, I turn around and see you with Hermione! That's the only reason I go to the cemetery everyday is because he listened! If you won't maybe in death he will'
"Is that what you really think?" Harry asked sadly.
"Yes," she walked over to him.
"I love you, Ginny, I thought that you didn't want me,"
"But I do," At this point they were standing extremely close to each other until the point where they could feel the others breath. Harry saw in Ginny's eyes that she wasn't lying to hide something, that she really thought he didn't care, but he did. In Harry's, Ginny saw a frost come over them and almost everything that happened in the past never existed. They were two strangers, in love.
I drove for miles and miles
And wound up at your door
I've had you so many times
But somehow I want more
The Next Day Harry sat at a table alone in The Leaky Cauldron. He and Ginny had previously made up but he still felt emptiness. It was Hermione's emptiness. She needed that shoulder to cry on. Before Harry could decide to see her, she walked through the door, in all black, and her mood had not changed since three years ago. She was completely disheartened. Harry stood up and walked over to her.
"Hi Hermione," Harry said.
"Hi Harry," Hermione said sadly.
"Can we talk?" "Sure,"
Hermione followed Harry upstairs where they took a room so that they could talk out any problems that they where having. "Hermione, I want to be there for you," Harry said suddenly, not believing he was being so open.
"What do you mean?" Hermione asked.
"You've been upset since Ron passed and if it makes you feel any better to talk it all out, then I'm here for you," Harry walked over to her.
There was silence. Then Hermione turned to him, followed by more silence.
"Hermi-" Harry began but before he could say anything else, she had wrapped her arms around him and exploded.
"Oh Harry! It's awful! I can't live without him! He was my everything and now . . . . oh I can't do it!' Hermione said.
"Hermione," Harry looked in her hurt eyes, "Ron loved you. He would want you to be happy, not to live in the past. To go on with life,"
"But I need him," Hermione protested.
"Hermione, before he left, he said that you were the light to his dark. He would want you to go on living life. Not forget him, but not to obsess about what you could have or should have done," Harry said.
"But I can't do it alone,"
"I'll help you," Harry said.
Hermione gave a look of thankfulness and gave Harry a warm hug. But before departing Hermione brushed her lips against his. But Harry pushed away slightly.
"Hermione, I don't think we should be doing this,"
"I'm not so sure either,"
But before they could say another word Harry kissed Hermione and, shocked, she responded.
The next thing they knew, they were lying in bed next to each other. What had Harry done? Before Harry could think about how wrong it was, there was a knock on the door. He quickly got up and got dressed as Hermione did the same. Harry walked over to the door and opened it. He was breathless. It was Ginny.
"Hi Harry!" Ginny said hugging him, apparently no thought of what happened ran across her mind.
"Ginny, hi!" Hermione walked over, calmly.
"What are you two doing up here?" Ginny asked, no thought of what did happened, surfacing.
"Well . . ." Harry was nervous.
"What happened was I was a bit up set and Harry and I talked it all . . . out . . ." Hermione slowed down because the warm smiles on the faces of the two girls disappeared. Ron's memory had resurfaced.
It was like Harry did what Ron asked and broke his promise at the same time. Speaking of broken, both of the girls were broken. Broken smiles, broken hearts (Ginny's was silently broken), broken.
"Um . . Ginny, Hermione, why don't we all go downstairs and have a bit of coffee and talk about some things," Harry offered.
Ginny and Hermione agreed. Harry didn't know how much more of this he could take. Was what happened a mistake? If not, he knew one thing, he loved two people. And if that wasn't possible, then he loved no one.
I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner out in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
She will be loved
Over the next few days, Harry never left his house. He felt so dirty. He had betrayed his best friend; who was dead. Harry lay in bed thinking. The clock read 5:33 am. Harry wanted to be there for Hermione and love Ginny at the same time and that wasn't working too well. He just had to tell them what Ron told him. But at the same time he felt obligated to keep that last secret between the two of them. Maybe it was supposed to be like this. Was there anyway of telling how to be a friend and a boyfriend at the same time? There was no one he could relate to. Maybe he would have to live in misery. God, oh, God, why were things so screwed up? Maybe he should just jump off a bridge and kill Ron in the after life for putting him through this. Harry finally got up and took a shower. About the hundredth one since he had been with Hermione and still he felt so soiled. When he went downstairs, he just sat on the bottom stair. What the hell he was waiting to happen, he didn't know. He thought for a moment before standing up and walking into the living room. On the various tables were photos. Some of Harry and Ginny, some of Ron and Hermione and there was also one of Harry and Hermione. The odd feeling of wrong came over him. Then there was a tap at the window. Harry walked over and looked out. No person or animal but loads of rain. Then there was a slight knock on the door. Harry walked over and opened it to find a soak-to-the-skin, Ginny.
Without saying a word, Harry let Ginny in and they just stood there. For moments everything just stopped.
Then, as if it were staged, they stepped right in front of each other. Harry could feel cold breath and frozen lips brush his. Her iced over eyes glazed over all pain that was felt. As they embraced in a hug, Harry felt Ginny embed a hand-print in his back. Her hands burned. But it was a cleansing sensation. Harry looked in Ginny's eyes, they were of love. She was beautiful. Her hair floating around her wet face. He loved her. It was a sense of renewal. He didn't dare tell her what he did 'that' day, but without even knowing, it was like she forgave him. He look her hand, which burned like ice but he didn't care. They walked upstairs and then renewed their love.
Tap on my window knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful
I know I tend to get so insecure
It doesn't matter anymore
A Week Later Harry and Ginny patched things up, though they were never really torn. right now he was sitting at the kitchen table in his home. His thoughts were sifting through the thought of Hermione. All week he had been avoiding her. He wasn't quite sure why. Maybe because she was killing his relationship. Harry glanced at the calendar. Holy Mary, mother of God. 4 years ago Ron had passed away. Geeze. Harry could remember every word they said to each other. Then when Harry thought for a moment, he dropped the coffee cup he was holding. His last words to Ron were haunting 'you're not going to die Ron . . . I won't let you.' But Ron was gone. It seems so stupid to think that he could have any control over fate but he still felt guilty. As Harry began picking up the broken glass, there was a knock on the back door. Harry slowly stood up and walked over to the door and peered out. Hermione.
"Hi, Hermione, what can I do for you?" Harry asked.
"Hold me," she said, tears of remorse fell from her heartbroken eyes.
Harry jerked back into a state of agitation, and wrapped his arms around her. He felt her shudder at the cold air that was being let in. Why was he blessed with such a rotten position? He felt Hermione's pain. She lost the love of her life and Harry let him die. Harry felt tears trickle down his face and land on Hermione's neck. She pushed away slightly. "Harry? What's wrong?" Hermione asked. Harry just looked at her. He didn't want to answer. He didn't want to let out the last secret . . . but he did.
"Oh God! I let him die, Hermione! I promised him that I-I wouldn't let him die and now . . . Dammit! he's dead! I promised I would never break Ginny's heart and every moment I spend with you brings back that day and that's silently breaking her heart without her knowing which, in turn, is worse then telling her! And I said that I would love you but I can't do that and have a relationship!" Harry yelled as they both fell to the floor.
"Harry . . . . . I'm sorry," Hermione cradled him.
She didn't know exactly how to respond to that. In a way, he just told her that she was destroying his life. "Harry, what do you want me to do?" Hermione asked a slight tone in her voice.
"I don't know!" Harry protested, "I want to be there for you and love Ginny and it's not working!"
"What do you want me to do?" Hermione asked again.
"I DON'T KNOW!" Harry roared.
"Harry, I want to be your friend but after that day at the Leaky Cauldron . . . that's going to be difficult," Hermione looked in his emerald eyes.
Harry looked back but couldn't take it.
"No . . no. Hermione, no. Don't this," Harry said.
"I told, you. I can't help it,"
"I know but . . . Ron wanted me to be there for you and I can't do that and love Ginny at the same time. Doing it secretly it not an option. It's not a secret now but . . no one knows and it hurts just as bad!" Harry confessed.
"Harry! I suggest that you quickly pull yourself together because due to today's date, I'm going to need some comforting myself!" Hermione shrieked Harry quickly took Hermione in his arms. She slowly began to cry. No words needed to be said. She felt so alone in this place we called the world. So many people but no one cared. Ron was the only one who really loved her and Harry was her only friend left. He guessed, in a way, she felt like she had to love the closet person to Ron. And Harry was that person. After a while of emotions running wild, Hermione stood up. "Harry I'm sorry if I caused you any pain. If I hurt you and Ginny. I apologize. I'm sorry," Hermione said giving Harry a sad look.
"It's alright Hermione. Alot of what happened was my fault and I blame myself for letting it happen," Harry said standing up, though he strongly agreed with what Hermione said.
There then a long silence. Then Hermione walked back over to Harry and gave him a hug.
"Thank you," she said letting go and walking out the door.
"Hermione," Harry said as she turned around, "if you need someone to listen, my doors always open,"
"Thanks," Hermione said and walked out the door.
It's not always rainbows and butterflies
It's compromise that moves us along
My heart is full and my doors always open
You can come anytime you want
2 Months Later Harry was sitting in the edge of his bed on a misty, rainy morning. He hadn't seen Hermione in nearly a week. Ginny had come to live with Harry and right now, she was asleep. He was glad that Hermione saw his point but he was sorry he told her the truth. It wasn't just that 'last secret', it was that the truth hurt her. He felt guilty. Now, he wasn't slowly breaking Ginny's heart, he was slowly deteriorating what was left of his friend. He peered over at Ginny. Red strands of hair floating around her pallid face. He loved her but couldn't stand losing Hermione. The lightening outside flashed and the thunder roared. Harry stood up and paced in front of the bed. He walked over to the window and looked out to see a black Chevrolet. It was Hermione. Before he could close the curtains or decide what to do, there was a knock on the door. He hurried downstairs, without even checking to make sure that Ginny was still asleep, and opened the door. There stood Hermione. She was soaked.
"Hermione?" Harry asked and then found Hermione wrapped around him. He could feel her heart breaking with every breath she drew in.
"It's alright Hermione. I'm here now," Harry said.
He knew Hermione was suffering. She lost her love. Her only friend couldn't see her. It was a mess. A total catastrophe. As Harry comforted Hermione, he glanced upstairs and saw Ginny looking down. Then he knew, the game was over.
I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay a while
And she will be loved
She will be loved.
Ginny ran downstairs and out the door. Harry knew where she was heading. She got into her car and just sat there. Harry ran after her. "Ginny! Open the door . . . . Gin!?" Harry yelled.
But Ginny just sat there.
"Ginny, please!" Harry sunk to the side of the car.
He didn't know just how to explain the situation to her. But he had to try.
"Ginny, when Ron died, he made me promise not to break your heart and be there for Hermione. But being there for Hermione means breaking your heart. I can't do both. Ginny, please, you have to understand. If she's upset, I can't just turn away. I have to be there, and that's hard. Why won't you trust me with that! Please. I love you. I would never intentionally hurt you. If I said something I'm sorry. I'd rather jump off a bridge then hurt you anymore! I don't know what to say to make you realize how sorry I am. I love you," Harry said.
But Ginny just sat there without saying a word, just staring at the steering wheel. "Ginny, I love and if I can't have you, then I can't have anything . . . at all," Harry said standing up.
Tap on my window knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful
Harry had run to the nearest bridge. He peered down. It must have been 200 feet down. His hair blew with the wind as he climbed to the edge. The wind pierced his face. He flashed back to when he, Ron and Hermione were friends. He and Ginny were together. But all those memories went to the grave with Ron. Ron was gone, Ginny didn't trust him and Hermione was as good ad gone along with Ron. "Harry stop!" Ginny and Hermione yelled getting out of Hermione's car.
"Take one more step and I'll do it!" Harry yelled back.
"Harry no! I'm sorry! Please some back here!" Ginny pleaded.
"No!" Harry retorted.
He didn't want to go back to a life of lies and scandals. Ending it was probably scarier, but right now, it was easier. "Harry!" Hermione yelled, "I'm sorry too! Please don't do this!"
"Harry I love you!" Ginny yelled and began walking toward him slowly.
"Stop!" he yelled but she didn't.
"Harry," she took his hand, "I'm sorry if you're unhappy, but if you go, I do to,"
"Ginny! No!" Hermione hadn't moved.
"Harry, I love you," Ginny said silently.
"I love you too," Harry said and they shared their last kiss.
Then with the slight breeze, they tossed themselves over in each others arms.
"No!" Hermione screamed running over to the edge, but they were no where in sight. She gazed up at the sky and saw the three faces of Ron, Harry and Ginny. She wasn't sure what to do. Jump and join them, or stay here and morn. She decided and turned around. Her back was to the river. "I love you, Ron," she whispered and fell backward.
I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay a while
And she will be loved
She will be loved
She will be loved
Everyone please read and review this! I spent a lot of time working on this and I really want some feedback so please take some time out of your busy schedule to review this!
Summary - After Ron's death, Harry is left with the task of be there for Hermione and never breaking Ginny heart but what happens when things get out of control? Please Read and Review! (I know you're saying shut - up but please!) All flamers are used to burn the Los Lonely Boys song 'Heaven.' (sorry to the fans!)
And Now Ashley Connor Proudly Presents:
She Will Be Loved In a hospital room, plain and still, Ron Weasley lay motionless. He was alive, yes, but he didn't have much time left. He was alone in the room as he was not to be disturbed. He met his fate with the oh so famous 'Whomping Willow Tree.' He was thrown into the tree by none other then You-Know-Who. He, as a best friend should, was trying to protect Harry. Ron was in front of Harry and got the full impact. They we both thrown backward and well . . . . they were both badly injured but Ron got the full beating. But this was not the point. Ron needed to see Harry . . . now. As soon as the mire thought of seeing Harry occurred, Harry, only Harry, walked through the door. "Ron?!" Harry asked and dashed to the bedside, "are you okay?" Harry seized Ron's hand. "I'm fine, for now," Ron said.
"Good, I thought that-"
"Harry," Ron silenced him, "I need you to promise me something,"
Harry confused, agreed.
"Anything,"
"Before I go-"
"You're not going any-"
"But if I do, I need you to do something for me," Ron said and a silence developed between them, "you know I love Hermione," Ron began and when Harry tried to comment, Ron stopped him as he needed all the time he could use, "she was one of the many things that kept me going. She's the light to my dark. Graceful, elegant, God I love her. And Ginny, my little sister. So shy, so brilliant. I was the only brother she said she could trust. I protected her. Harry, those two girls are the two most important girls in my life. You know that. You and Ginny have been together for only two months. Harry, I beg of you, do not break her heart,"
"Never," Harry vowed. "And as for Hermione, she can take care of herself and she'd kill me for saying this, but I want you to watch out for her. If she needs a shoulder to cry I want you to be there. I want you to fill the emptiness that I'll leave,"
"T-take your place?" Harry asked as Ron nodded, "Ron. I couldn't, she belongs to you,"
"Harry, I'm not asking you to marry her. I'm asking you to love her, that's all, make her feel loved," Ron said.
"I promise," Harry said.
"Thank you. And now, I have to leave you," Ron said kindly to Harry.
"No, Ron," Harry felt water in his eyes, "no you're not going anywhere. You're my best friend, and you're not going to die . . . . I won't let you," Harry said as Ron closed his eyes and his pale hand loosened it's grip and finally, all warmth had drained from him and Ron was gone. Harry stood up and took a moment to let out a sigh releasing the pain. Ron was gone, at age 19.
Harry walked down the hall to the elevator. He went from floor 15 to the first floor where the Weasley's and Hermione where all waiting. "Harry!" Mrs. Weasley said as she and everyone else stood up.
"Harry did you see him?" Someone asked.
"Is he okay?" he heard Hermione say.
"Let him breathe," Another piped up.
"I did speak to him," Harry said feeling a knot in his stomach, "and-" he was cut off, a doctor walked in the room.
"Excuse me everyone. Is this the family of Ronald Weasley?" he asked as everyone nodded except Harry, "Oh . . . well I'm sorry. . . . we did everything we could but . . . we lost him . . . I'm so sorry," the doctor said walking away.
Harry watched as Mr. and Mrs. Weasley found a little comfort in each others arms. Bill and Charlie stood together in the corner, shock on their faces. Fred and George gave grieving looks. Percy stood with Ginny though she looked to Harry. Then there was Hermione. She sat by the window looking outside solemnly. Ron's words ran though Harry's mind and in instinct, he walked over to Hermione.
"Hermione?" Harry asked.
Hermione looked up at him. Her eyes killed to look at. Then Harry remembered, once again, his promise to Ron, 'make her feel loved,' Harry then found himself with his arms locked around Hermione. He saw Ginny out of the corner of his eye looking at him in an uneasy way. But he vowed he'd always be there to help them, always.
Beauty queen of only eighteen
She had some trouble with herself
He was always there to help her
She always belonged to someone else
3 Years Later Harry drove along the road. Where he was going he had no idea. Finally after an hour, he pulled up to the cemetery where Ron was. He got out of the car, but didn't walk over right away. He flashed back to the hospital room, remembering how he promised to love Hermione and never break Ginny's heart. He hardly saw either of the two lately. Hermione hardly ever spoke anymore and Ginny . . . . well, he did see her but not in the same light as before. She spent a lot of time at the cemetery. Mostly talking to the stone as if Ron where still here, but he wasn't. And Harry was supposed to fill the empty spots, but he couldn't. He walked over and looked at the stone.
"I'm sorry, Ron," Harry said silently, "I should have done better. But how can I care for both of them when one spends all her time with you and the other hardly speaks? Ginny won't talk to me. I want to protect her but, she won't let me. Hermione . . I don't even see her much. What am I gonna do?" Harry asked and sat there a while. Then, after two hours, of silence, he got up and got back in the car. And he drove. No destination really. Just the road. Harry wasn't really thinking either. Just staring. Spaced-out. Then he came to a stop in front of Ginny's house. He knew she was there alone because her car was the only one in the driveway. Without thinking, he got out of the car and found himself at her door. Before he had a chance to knock or ring the doorbell, a strange wind blew it open. Harry walked in to find photo's of Ron scattered all around the floor. Ginny was still upset. Not that she shouldn't be, she just never thought of anything else. "Ginny?" Harry called.
"In here," she answered.
Harry walked into the kitchen to see Ginny looking out the window with the same expression Hermione had that day at the hospital.
"Hi," Harry said.
"Hi," Ginny said, not even bothering to look at Harry.
"I came here to talk to you,"
"I don't really want to talk now," Ginny answered, her eyes not leaving the window.
"But I do," Harry said, a little aggravated and demanding.
"About what?" Ginny finally turned around.
"Why don't we talk anymore?" Harry said, he could feel the pressure of the conversation rising.
"We talk," Ginny said.
"No, we barley speak. Our regular conversation includes four phrases at the most. 'Hello, no yes' and 'goodbye.'" Harry said, knowing an explosion was about to occur.
"I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU WANT!!!" Ginny yelled.
"What the bloody hell is that supposed to mean!?" Harry asked.
"Everytime I try to love you or think that we have some kind of chance of being something again, I turn around and see you with Hermione! That's the only reason I go to the cemetery everyday is because he listened! If you won't maybe in death he will'
"Is that what you really think?" Harry asked sadly.
"Yes," she walked over to him.
"I love you, Ginny, I thought that you didn't want me,"
"But I do," At this point they were standing extremely close to each other until the point where they could feel the others breath. Harry saw in Ginny's eyes that she wasn't lying to hide something, that she really thought he didn't care, but he did. In Harry's, Ginny saw a frost come over them and almost everything that happened in the past never existed. They were two strangers, in love.
I drove for miles and miles
And wound up at your door
I've had you so many times
But somehow I want more
The Next Day Harry sat at a table alone in The Leaky Cauldron. He and Ginny had previously made up but he still felt emptiness. It was Hermione's emptiness. She needed that shoulder to cry on. Before Harry could decide to see her, she walked through the door, in all black, and her mood had not changed since three years ago. She was completely disheartened. Harry stood up and walked over to her.
"Hi Hermione," Harry said.
"Hi Harry," Hermione said sadly.
"Can we talk?" "Sure,"
Hermione followed Harry upstairs where they took a room so that they could talk out any problems that they where having. "Hermione, I want to be there for you," Harry said suddenly, not believing he was being so open.
"What do you mean?" Hermione asked.
"You've been upset since Ron passed and if it makes you feel any better to talk it all out, then I'm here for you," Harry walked over to her.
There was silence. Then Hermione turned to him, followed by more silence.
"Hermi-" Harry began but before he could say anything else, she had wrapped her arms around him and exploded.
"Oh Harry! It's awful! I can't live without him! He was my everything and now . . . . oh I can't do it!' Hermione said.
"Hermione," Harry looked in her hurt eyes, "Ron loved you. He would want you to be happy, not to live in the past. To go on with life,"
"But I need him," Hermione protested.
"Hermione, before he left, he said that you were the light to his dark. He would want you to go on living life. Not forget him, but not to obsess about what you could have or should have done," Harry said.
"But I can't do it alone,"
"I'll help you," Harry said.
Hermione gave a look of thankfulness and gave Harry a warm hug. But before departing Hermione brushed her lips against his. But Harry pushed away slightly.
"Hermione, I don't think we should be doing this,"
"I'm not so sure either,"
But before they could say another word Harry kissed Hermione and, shocked, she responded.
The next thing they knew, they were lying in bed next to each other. What had Harry done? Before Harry could think about how wrong it was, there was a knock on the door. He quickly got up and got dressed as Hermione did the same. Harry walked over to the door and opened it. He was breathless. It was Ginny.
"Hi Harry!" Ginny said hugging him, apparently no thought of what happened ran across her mind.
"Ginny, hi!" Hermione walked over, calmly.
"What are you two doing up here?" Ginny asked, no thought of what did happened, surfacing.
"Well . . ." Harry was nervous.
"What happened was I was a bit up set and Harry and I talked it all . . . out . . ." Hermione slowed down because the warm smiles on the faces of the two girls disappeared. Ron's memory had resurfaced.
It was like Harry did what Ron asked and broke his promise at the same time. Speaking of broken, both of the girls were broken. Broken smiles, broken hearts (Ginny's was silently broken), broken.
"Um . . Ginny, Hermione, why don't we all go downstairs and have a bit of coffee and talk about some things," Harry offered.
Ginny and Hermione agreed. Harry didn't know how much more of this he could take. Was what happened a mistake? If not, he knew one thing, he loved two people. And if that wasn't possible, then he loved no one.
I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner out in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
She will be loved
Over the next few days, Harry never left his house. He felt so dirty. He had betrayed his best friend; who was dead. Harry lay in bed thinking. The clock read 5:33 am. Harry wanted to be there for Hermione and love Ginny at the same time and that wasn't working too well. He just had to tell them what Ron told him. But at the same time he felt obligated to keep that last secret between the two of them. Maybe it was supposed to be like this. Was there anyway of telling how to be a friend and a boyfriend at the same time? There was no one he could relate to. Maybe he would have to live in misery. God, oh, God, why were things so screwed up? Maybe he should just jump off a bridge and kill Ron in the after life for putting him through this. Harry finally got up and took a shower. About the hundredth one since he had been with Hermione and still he felt so soiled. When he went downstairs, he just sat on the bottom stair. What the hell he was waiting to happen, he didn't know. He thought for a moment before standing up and walking into the living room. On the various tables were photos. Some of Harry and Ginny, some of Ron and Hermione and there was also one of Harry and Hermione. The odd feeling of wrong came over him. Then there was a tap at the window. Harry walked over and looked out. No person or animal but loads of rain. Then there was a slight knock on the door. Harry walked over and opened it to find a soak-to-the-skin, Ginny.
Without saying a word, Harry let Ginny in and they just stood there. For moments everything just stopped.
Then, as if it were staged, they stepped right in front of each other. Harry could feel cold breath and frozen lips brush his. Her iced over eyes glazed over all pain that was felt. As they embraced in a hug, Harry felt Ginny embed a hand-print in his back. Her hands burned. But it was a cleansing sensation. Harry looked in Ginny's eyes, they were of love. She was beautiful. Her hair floating around her wet face. He loved her. It was a sense of renewal. He didn't dare tell her what he did 'that' day, but without even knowing, it was like she forgave him. He look her hand, which burned like ice but he didn't care. They walked upstairs and then renewed their love.
Tap on my window knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful
I know I tend to get so insecure
It doesn't matter anymore
A Week Later Harry and Ginny patched things up, though they were never really torn. right now he was sitting at the kitchen table in his home. His thoughts were sifting through the thought of Hermione. All week he had been avoiding her. He wasn't quite sure why. Maybe because she was killing his relationship. Harry glanced at the calendar. Holy Mary, mother of God. 4 years ago Ron had passed away. Geeze. Harry could remember every word they said to each other. Then when Harry thought for a moment, he dropped the coffee cup he was holding. His last words to Ron were haunting 'you're not going to die Ron . . . I won't let you.' But Ron was gone. It seems so stupid to think that he could have any control over fate but he still felt guilty. As Harry began picking up the broken glass, there was a knock on the back door. Harry slowly stood up and walked over to the door and peered out. Hermione.
"Hi, Hermione, what can I do for you?" Harry asked.
"Hold me," she said, tears of remorse fell from her heartbroken eyes.
Harry jerked back into a state of agitation, and wrapped his arms around her. He felt her shudder at the cold air that was being let in. Why was he blessed with such a rotten position? He felt Hermione's pain. She lost the love of her life and Harry let him die. Harry felt tears trickle down his face and land on Hermione's neck. She pushed away slightly. "Harry? What's wrong?" Hermione asked. Harry just looked at her. He didn't want to answer. He didn't want to let out the last secret . . . but he did.
"Oh God! I let him die, Hermione! I promised him that I-I wouldn't let him die and now . . . Dammit! he's dead! I promised I would never break Ginny's heart and every moment I spend with you brings back that day and that's silently breaking her heart without her knowing which, in turn, is worse then telling her! And I said that I would love you but I can't do that and have a relationship!" Harry yelled as they both fell to the floor.
"Harry . . . . . I'm sorry," Hermione cradled him.
She didn't know exactly how to respond to that. In a way, he just told her that she was destroying his life. "Harry, what do you want me to do?" Hermione asked a slight tone in her voice.
"I don't know!" Harry protested, "I want to be there for you and love Ginny and it's not working!"
"What do you want me to do?" Hermione asked again.
"I DON'T KNOW!" Harry roared.
"Harry, I want to be your friend but after that day at the Leaky Cauldron . . . that's going to be difficult," Hermione looked in his emerald eyes.
Harry looked back but couldn't take it.
"No . . no. Hermione, no. Don't this," Harry said.
"I told, you. I can't help it,"
"I know but . . . Ron wanted me to be there for you and I can't do that and love Ginny at the same time. Doing it secretly it not an option. It's not a secret now but . . no one knows and it hurts just as bad!" Harry confessed.
"Harry! I suggest that you quickly pull yourself together because due to today's date, I'm going to need some comforting myself!" Hermione shrieked Harry quickly took Hermione in his arms. She slowly began to cry. No words needed to be said. She felt so alone in this place we called the world. So many people but no one cared. Ron was the only one who really loved her and Harry was her only friend left. He guessed, in a way, she felt like she had to love the closet person to Ron. And Harry was that person. After a while of emotions running wild, Hermione stood up. "Harry I'm sorry if I caused you any pain. If I hurt you and Ginny. I apologize. I'm sorry," Hermione said giving Harry a sad look.
"It's alright Hermione. Alot of what happened was my fault and I blame myself for letting it happen," Harry said standing up, though he strongly agreed with what Hermione said.
There then a long silence. Then Hermione walked back over to Harry and gave him a hug.
"Thank you," she said letting go and walking out the door.
"Hermione," Harry said as she turned around, "if you need someone to listen, my doors always open,"
"Thanks," Hermione said and walked out the door.
It's not always rainbows and butterflies
It's compromise that moves us along
My heart is full and my doors always open
You can come anytime you want
2 Months Later Harry was sitting in the edge of his bed on a misty, rainy morning. He hadn't seen Hermione in nearly a week. Ginny had come to live with Harry and right now, she was asleep. He was glad that Hermione saw his point but he was sorry he told her the truth. It wasn't just that 'last secret', it was that the truth hurt her. He felt guilty. Now, he wasn't slowly breaking Ginny's heart, he was slowly deteriorating what was left of his friend. He peered over at Ginny. Red strands of hair floating around her pallid face. He loved her but couldn't stand losing Hermione. The lightening outside flashed and the thunder roared. Harry stood up and paced in front of the bed. He walked over to the window and looked out to see a black Chevrolet. It was Hermione. Before he could close the curtains or decide what to do, there was a knock on the door. He hurried downstairs, without even checking to make sure that Ginny was still asleep, and opened the door. There stood Hermione. She was soaked.
"Hermione?" Harry asked and then found Hermione wrapped around him. He could feel her heart breaking with every breath she drew in.
"It's alright Hermione. I'm here now," Harry said.
He knew Hermione was suffering. She lost her love. Her only friend couldn't see her. It was a mess. A total catastrophe. As Harry comforted Hermione, he glanced upstairs and saw Ginny looking down. Then he knew, the game was over.
I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay a while
And she will be loved
She will be loved.
Ginny ran downstairs and out the door. Harry knew where she was heading. She got into her car and just sat there. Harry ran after her. "Ginny! Open the door . . . . Gin!?" Harry yelled.
But Ginny just sat there.
"Ginny, please!" Harry sunk to the side of the car.
He didn't know just how to explain the situation to her. But he had to try.
"Ginny, when Ron died, he made me promise not to break your heart and be there for Hermione. But being there for Hermione means breaking your heart. I can't do both. Ginny, please, you have to understand. If she's upset, I can't just turn away. I have to be there, and that's hard. Why won't you trust me with that! Please. I love you. I would never intentionally hurt you. If I said something I'm sorry. I'd rather jump off a bridge then hurt you anymore! I don't know what to say to make you realize how sorry I am. I love you," Harry said.
But Ginny just sat there without saying a word, just staring at the steering wheel. "Ginny, I love and if I can't have you, then I can't have anything . . . at all," Harry said standing up.
Tap on my window knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful
Harry had run to the nearest bridge. He peered down. It must have been 200 feet down. His hair blew with the wind as he climbed to the edge. The wind pierced his face. He flashed back to when he, Ron and Hermione were friends. He and Ginny were together. But all those memories went to the grave with Ron. Ron was gone, Ginny didn't trust him and Hermione was as good ad gone along with Ron. "Harry stop!" Ginny and Hermione yelled getting out of Hermione's car.
"Take one more step and I'll do it!" Harry yelled back.
"Harry no! I'm sorry! Please some back here!" Ginny pleaded.
"No!" Harry retorted.
He didn't want to go back to a life of lies and scandals. Ending it was probably scarier, but right now, it was easier. "Harry!" Hermione yelled, "I'm sorry too! Please don't do this!"
"Harry I love you!" Ginny yelled and began walking toward him slowly.
"Stop!" he yelled but she didn't.
"Harry," she took his hand, "I'm sorry if you're unhappy, but if you go, I do to,"
"Ginny! No!" Hermione hadn't moved.
"Harry, I love you," Ginny said silently.
"I love you too," Harry said and they shared their last kiss.
Then with the slight breeze, they tossed themselves over in each others arms.
"No!" Hermione screamed running over to the edge, but they were no where in sight. She gazed up at the sky and saw the three faces of Ron, Harry and Ginny. She wasn't sure what to do. Jump and join them, or stay here and morn. She decided and turned around. Her back was to the river. "I love you, Ron," she whispered and fell backward.
I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay a while
And she will be loved
She will be loved
She will be loved