S.W.A.K. Hammer
Though he had long worried that he would never have a lover, Rocko had proved his past insecurities wrong. Alicia seemed everything he wanted and more. She was Australian, a marsupial, and working class, just like him. Furthermore she had the confidence and charm that he had longed for, and he was pleased when she told him that her letter describing her reciprocated infatuation was not a mere "postal prank." After six months of dating, Rocko and Alicia decided to leave O-Town for their homeland of Australia, which the couple had not returned to in several years. They had heard in the news that the country had changed significantly and wondered whether it was for the better. However, the day before their Jet Scream flight, Rocko stumbled into a discovery that would change his plans entirely.
It all started when Rocko and his friends Heffer and Filbert were hanging out together at the Chokey Chicken. Due to his relationship, Rocko had little time for his friends in the past few months and wanted to make it up to them right before he left. Yet at the same time he worried about how much he would drift apart from them afterwards.
"Gee whiz, it sure is taking a while for the monkeys here to give us our chicken," remarked Heffer, rubbing his massive stomach.
"You just ate some roast beef and a whole pizza," whined Filbert. "I'd be careful if I were you. Hutch won't help you if you don't have health insurance, which you don't."
"Yeah, yeah," said Heffer. "Say, isn't that Rocko's girlfriend Alicia?" He pointed a fat finger at a nearby booth, where Alicia, dressed in her postal worker uniform, was sitting with a horse. As Rocko tried to make out their words, he realized the two were clearly chatting in a flirtatious manner.
"No, sir, I don't like it," the horse said to Alicia in a serious manner. "I spent four whole nights in Australia this summer, and it is not worth your time or money. But this Rocko kid seems desperate to get back to his roots, so here's my plan. Just tell the little guy you'll meet him in Sydney, and we can have this whole town to ourselves. What do you think of that?"
Anger made its way through every part of Rocko's face. He began to march over to Alicia's booth.
"Oh, fishsticks. Don't, Rocko!" yelled Filbert, attempting to grasp his friend with his bony arms.
"Fishsticks? I thought we were having chicken," said Heffer.
"Why, you two-timing…" began Rocko in an untamed frenzy as Alicia and the horse stared at one another in disbelief.
"Two-timing? I'm just a horse," said the horse. "Mr. Horse, to be exact."
It was just then that the Bigheads walked in with their dog Earl on a leash.
"I hate chicken," roared Ed Bighead.
"Oh, Ed, you need more protein in your diet," nagged Bev Bighead as she stroked Earl's pelt. Suddenly, Bev lost control of her leash and Earl ran amok, beginning to sic Alicia.
"Heh heh, oh my," said Rocko as the postal worker received her usual mistreatment from the neighborhood's worst behaved dog. He then walked back to his table and finished the meal with his friends, deciding to stay in O-Town for the time being.
"No sir, I didn't like it," Mr. Horse commented on the mauling of his girlfriend, who promptly slapped him with an oar and strutted off to hook up with Wallace the pizza elephant.