A/N: So.. I already read the whole manga of Death Note but just recently started the anime. Although I stopped watching after L died T_T. Not that I hate Near & Mello. I fell in love with the relationship of the three with L (platonic). Excuse my ramblings..
English is not my native language and this is my first story so please go easy on me.
Warnings: OOC! L
Disclaimer:
Do you see L& Watari alive? Do you see them working together with Near & Mello? No, because Death Note is written by Tsugumi Ohba and illustrated by Takeshi Obata.
Death Knell
I.
L cannot remember when he first heard the bells.
It just came to him one day the sound of clanging bells. It was soft, almost silent, yet he heard it anyway. He can't ask his parents for they don't even spare a glance at him except once when he expressed his desire to buy a cake for his birthday, if only to glare at him. "Worthless child", they say. Since then, he did not ask anything from them.
He continues to hear the soft sound of the bells throughout the day but he pays it no heed.
The next day, a child from his neighbourhood was found dead.
II.
He continued to hear the bells. Their soft sounds calming him during storms and often lull him in his sleep. He sometimes feels guilty for taking comfort in his bells when it signifies the death of others. But during those times he finally realizes that no one is there for him, no one, not even his parents, but his bell will always stay with him.
III.
He woke up one night to the loud sounds outside his window. It was not the loud rumbles of storm that woke him up this time; it was the loud clanging of bells. The once silent sound turned rambunctious by every second.
He did not sleep peacefully that night.
'A couple was found dead at their bedroom.
Investigation concludes robbery.
Their child was found in the attic and was taken into the
hospital for possible shock.'
IV.
He did not cry at the funeral.
He should cry, he thought. But he cannot a shed a tear for he does not know why. Why should he cry? For love, he supposed. Because children loved their parents. Children cry for they cannot experience the love of their parents anymore. Children cry when their parents are dead.
But L did not know love.
He cannot cry for he did not experience this so called love many people like. He did not know why mothers hug their children. He did not know why a child would cry at his parent's absence. He did not know why a mother would buy her child gifts and give him anything he wants. In all his genius mind, he cannot comprehend why one would bother to love at all.
He did not want to know.
..
The funeral ended with quiet apologies and unhidden pities.
There were some who offered him money but he refused it. He does not want to be seen as a weak, pitiful child. He does not understand the fuss about him being alone. In his opinion he was always alone. From the moment he was born, no one was there for him. There was no difference this time.
He was in front of the newly dug grave when he heard approaching footsteps.
'The footsteps were light but not enough to be taken in as a child. An elder? From the sound of his shoes in contact with the grass, I would say he's quite rich.'
The man stopped just a few meters behind him.
" I'm sorry about what happened to your parents."
"It's fine."
He can hear the man walk a few steps to him.
"Would you like me to accompany you home?"
"Home?"
'He must be joking for he has no home, he holds no place in this world. Somebody like him will die and no one will care at all.'
"Surely there is someone you are staying with."
"I have no home."
The man walked until there's only a feet between them.
Then would you like to come with me?
V.
The man, who introduced himself as Quillish Wammy, brought him to an orphanage. The orphanage was enormous and L found himself in awe.
Quillish chuckled at his reaction, "Do you like it?"
L nodded.
"Do you want to live here then?"
His eyes widened at the question. And with a shy smile he answered, "I would love to."
Quillish held his hand as they walk towards the orphanage.
He does not know love and he does not have a home. But if he would have, he knows he will find it in the presence of Wammy-san.
VI.
His first night at the orphanage did not go quite well.
He was woken up by nightmares and the consistent ringing of bells. The bells from his parents' funeral still linger around him. Knowing that he will not sleep anytime soon, he went in hopes of finding Wammy-san.
He found Quillish in the kitchen, checking on the food supply. Quillish immediately approached him at the recognition of a presence. Putting down his chart, he gently asked, "What's wrong L?"
"I can't sleep." He said, albeit shy at asking for help.
Quillish paused for a while to think, "Then how about I baked you a cake?"
The boy's eyes widened at the prospect of cake, "Please!"
Wammy-san indeed baked him a cake. The cake was pretty, lined up with strawberries and cream. It made him drool just at the sight of it.
"Here you go." Wammy-san handed him a slice on a silver plate.
As soon as he tasted the cake, tears began to swell up at the corner of his almost black eyes.
Meanwhile Quillish panicked at the sight of the boy crying. He quickly went beside the boy and comforted him.
"I'm sorry L. I can bake you another if you don't like it."
L shook his head, tears still evident, "No Wammy-san, the cake is good. It's just that this is the first time someone gave me something, much more baked a cake."
Quillish patted the boy and crouched to his eye level, "Don't worry, I would bake you a cake everyday if that is what will make you smile."
Tears swelled up once again, "Thank you Wammy-san."
The old man chuckled, "You're most certainly welcome L."
The night continued in silence as L finally found his home.
VII.
When Quillish discovered L's genius mind and skills it did not come as a surprise for he knew that the boy was always special. The way he would deduce things around him, how he would get bored of complex puzzles or how he solved the entire booklet of Sudoku in just less than half an hour screams nothing but talent.
"Found him Wammy-san." L finally said, eyes glinting in delight as he found the suspect of a serial murder case. He encoded his deduction and ended it with an alias, L.
That day, Quillish Wammy also found the path he would take up with L.
VIII.
It has been a long time since he heard the bells. Being with Watari made him forget about the lingering bells from his parents' funeral. However, today was not one of those days.
In contrary, the bells were not loud that day. They were as soft as the others if not for the haunting echoes of the bells.
A was found with a noose around his neck.
IX.
A detective will not be easily fazed by his emotions. He will not wallow in guilt but use his experiences to better his self and to avoid committing the same mistake.
He did not think about A's suicide or B's deranged path as he started on new cases.
He did not think about how it was his fault, his only, no one but his, that the first 2 successors were broken.
He did not think about them. Only that he will not let it happen again.
A buzzing noise interrupted his thoughts.
"What is it Watari?"
"There has been a fuss going on in Japan. Many criminals suffer heart attacks then drop dead."
"Oh? Would you please enlighten then."
He goes by the name Kira
X.
Kira
A strange killer with hopes of cleansing this world.
'How bizarre. It's almost like he wants to rule the world.'
L is justice.
And justice always prevail.
XI.
He could almost laugh at the irony.
The son of the chief of Japanese Police turns out to be Kira, their number one enemy.
He carefully planned against Kira and succeeded in cornering him and the second Kira.
Kira was smart, dangerous. He thinks of every back up plan to counter your attacks. His attack was his greatest defense and he uses it to his advantage.
Forfeit
This single word changed everything.
Just like having waked up from a dream, Light's attitude turned 180 degrees, like he was a different person.
"It has been two weeks since the killings have stopped. Are you still claiming to be innocent? "
"I am not Kira! Zoom in or anything! Look at these eyes and you would know I am not lying!"
'Not yet'
"Yagami-san, I need your help."
"What are you saying Dad?" "Stop Dad. I am not Kira! Dying right here would be what Kira expects! Don't you understand!?"
"Both of us are murderers. We'll meet in hell."
"Stop!"
Bang.
..
"Were you watching, Ryuzaki? I did what you said and as you can see I'm still alive."
Let's capture Kira together Ryuzaki.
XII.
The bells were getting quite louder day by day. And unlike the others, the bells rang continuously without even a minute break. He wonders if he would die soon.
..
"Do you really need to go this far Ryuzaki?"
"I am not doing this because I want to you know."1
..
"We moved to a headquarters that has the equipment but you don't seem to have any kind of motivation Ryuzaki."
"Motivation? I'm actually depressed."
Bam
"An eye for an eye."
"Ahh!"
"We..we have to go and stop them."
"Matsuda.. leave them.."
..
"I think everyone should return to the police. I can take it from here on my own. And I promise I will call you at the police headquarters one day and hand over the head of Kira."
"Ryuzaki, you'll never be on your own as long as I'm still here. I haven't forgotten our promise."
..
"I know we're understaffed but this is not my job. Matsuda you fool.."
..
"We cannot do what you are planning Ryuzaki because your methods are wrong!"
"You plan to get somebody killed in order to find Kira but we will stop you!"
"Light! Do you have a number of one of those 7?"
"This is L."
"Your plan worked well."
"Yeah"
.
.
.
"If I were to die would you succeed me as L?"
My number of friends had increased again..
XIII.
L knew this day would be his last.
Not wasting any time, he placed his feet on the ground and stood up. A few minutes later, he reached Watari's room.
The old man sat infront of the monitors, still dutifully doing his job. When he recognized L, he quickly turned around.
"What seems to trouble you?"
No response.
"What's wrong Ryuzaki?"
"This may be my last day."
Watari ignored the ache he felt in his heart. He knew the moment he decided to accompany L on his journey that someday he will have to risk his life. Yet he ignored it and came out on the pretence that everything will be fine. Because L means so much to him. L is more than the 3 greatest detectives or the boss of Watari. L is his own, his own precious son.
"What are you saying Ryuzaki..?"
"The bells Watari. They are too loud today."
"But it can just mean that someone close to you will die."
"I have been hearing the bells these past days." L started, fiddling his right foot on his left leg. "And since then, they have not stopped. Today they ring loudly."
"Ryuzaki.."
"I'm afraid that you're going to die before me. I'm sorry Watari.."
Watari stood up and walked towards him. He patted the boy and hugged him. Running his fingers on his locks, he muttered, "Don't apologize Ryuzaki. Countless times you have made me proud. You are my greatest pride, child. Even if I didn't have a wife or children before, I have treated you as my own son. Don't apologize, you have done enough."
"Watari, although I said that I don't want to celebrate my birthday, can you please bake me a strawberry shortcake?"
A chuckle, "Anything for you child."
..
The rain drips on the teen's black locks as he contemplated in peace. Dull ebony eyes lock on the raindrops vigorously falling.
'The weather sure matches the day huh..'
The day pretty much looks like a funeral. With the bells tolling loudly and the gloomy sky, one would've guessed something unpleasant will unfold. 'Though I guess the dead will be I and Watari.'
He thinks back to Watari. He remembers the first time they met. Watari was kind and good natured. He cared for L more than anyone could. And even then, he never asked for anything in return. He would always endure L's requests no matter how ridiculous it is. He was the first one who tried to understand him; he didn't care about his quirks or dry personality. Most of all, he taught him love, a word, no, a feeling he thought he would never get to feel. Watari loved him and gave him a home.
A shout interrupted his thoughts and saw Yagami Light just a few meters away from him. He placed a hand above his ear, beckoning Light to repeat what he was saying. The shout just came out as garbled as the rain poured heavily around him.
With a sigh, Light walked closer and stopped a few distance. "What are you doing Ryuzaki?"
Putting his hands in his pocket, he replied, "Well I'm not doing anything in particular.. but the sound of the bells…"
"Bells..?"
He once more returned his gaze at the sky. "Yes, the bells have been really noisy throughout the day."
Light looked around then settled his gaze at L. "I don't hear anything."
"Really? They've been ringing all day and..I can't help but feel curious."
Light continued to be confused as L rambled, "Do you suppose it's a church? A wedding? Or perhaps.."
'..my funeral'
"What are you talking about Ryuzaki?"
L turned around in response.
"Don't say such silly things. Let's go back."
"I'm sorry. Everything I say is completely nonsense. Please don't believe in any of it."
Light looked at him in disbelief but played along.
"That's right Ryuzaki. Most of what you said is nonsense. There would be no end if I took you seriously all the time."
"That's right but.. have you ever told the truth since the time you were born?"
His last chance in hoping that Light would confess..
"What are you talking about Ryuzaki? Not a single peson lived without telling a lie. I may have lied but I am careful to not hurt others."
L's face fell at his answer.
'Until my last day he would not admit that he is Kira..'
"I knew you would say that."
"Let's go back. We're getting drenched."
..
The two settled inside just beside the staircase.
"That was awful." L commented, bringing his towel up to his hair, wiping the remnants of the heavy rain that ran through his ebony locks.
"It was your fault you know." Light retorted, face annoyed at being drenched.
All he received was a curt reply "I'm sorry."
The two continued to dry themselves in silence. L noticed the other wiping himself vigorously. He paused for a while then offered to help him which the latter refused at first.
L settled a few steps below him, giving him a foot massage. Perturbed by his actions, he almost didn't catch his next words.
"It's sad.."
Light just listened in silence, beckoning L to continue.
"..how we're going to soon part.."
Light was about to ask him to clear his words when a phone call interrupted them.
'Watari..'
'…yes..'
'..ok..thank you.'
Pocketing his phone, L turned to him, "It seems we are needed. We have to get back now."
You are my first friend Yagami-kun
L wonders if this is what death really looks like.
Death had always been lurking around him. With the countless cases he solved, he has become quite accustomed to the idea of death.
But being familiar to the idea is not the same as with the pain. The pain surges through his heart, electrocuting every part of his body.
He knew. He knew he would die soon. He knew Watari would have to go before him. He knew he would have to witness Watari die. He knew but he can't stop it.
Because death is inevitable. From the dust to dust, ashes to ashes. He too would eventually return to the ground. Death was supposed to bring relief, to bring peace. It was supposed to end one's suffering. Yet it didn't.
It didn't bring him comfort to the fact that Watari was dead. That he was going to die soon without the arrest of Kira. And that the one who killed him was his first friend.
And as though reaching its peak, his recollections of past flooded through him, allowing him to reminisce during his last moments.
[Would you like to come with me?]
[This is my orphanage L. You can stay here if you like.]
[I baked you a cake L.]
[You have a brilliant mind son.]
[I will accompany you then. As Watari, that is.]
[I will always be proud at you.]
He turned one last time to look at Light. And true enough, there was a fiendish grin etched in his face.
'Yagami Light'
'So.. I.. I wasn't wrong..'
[Sleep now, my child]
And L Lawliet slept for the first time in days.
The bells have stopped.
There is no heaven or hell. No matter what you do while you're alive, everybody goes to the same place once you die. Death is Equal.
~L Lawliet
1 If you haven't guessed, this refers to the part when L handcuffed himself to Light. These are the actual lines from the manga… or atleast the english translation ^_^'