In my place, in my place
Were lines that I couldn't change
I was lost, oh yeah
I was lost, I was lost
Crossed lines I shouldn't have crossed
I was lost, oh yeah
Yeah, how long must you wait for him?
Yeah, how long must you pay for him?
Yeah, how long must you wait for him?
I was scared, I was scared
Tired and underprepared
But I wait for you
If you go, if you go
Leaving me here on my own
Well I wait for you
Yeah, how long must you wait for him?
Yeah, how long must you pay for him?
Yeah, how long must you wait for him?
Please, please, please
Come on and sing to me
To me, me
Come on and sing it out, out, out
Come on and sing it now, now, now
Come on and sing it
In my place, in my place
Were lines that I couldn't change
I was lost, oh yeah
Oh yeah
in my place (coldplay)
If Rachel was honest with herself, kissing Finn on stage at National's had been more in the heat of the moment than of her real feelings returning. And if she was brutally honest, to the point where she didn't want to leave her bed for the rest of the day, Jesse's sudden appearance, and knowing that he had seen said kiss, confused her even more. Because here was a boy who had broken her heart yet traveled so many miles just to see her perform, because regardless of what had already transpired in the past, he had real feelings for her.
Deep feelings.
And the fact of the matter was, Rachel was too scared of them to look into it further. Finn was safe and caring and there, but even as crazy as she might have gotten around him, she knew she wouldn't be in deep enough where she couldn't get back out, and that was in the end why she chose him.
When they had gotten back to Ohio, Rachel had done her best to avoid Jesse. It wasn't that hard-Jesse was from a completely different town, and she knew all of his favorite locations. He had tried calling her, but after her simple text of I'm with Finn again. I'm sorry, he had left her alone. The last she had heard, he was getting ready to go to New York and try his hand at school once more, and she was left in Lima for her senior year.
Her relationship with Finn inevitably fell apart once more, but she held her head high-this time she wasn't going to sit around and wait for him to realize that she was wonderful for him. This time she was keeping her heart clear of any obligations when the time came for her to leave, and when Quinn and Finn ended up together at Prom once more, she was surprised that it didn't sting.
Senior year felt long, and with new members of the Glee Club, she wasn't getting nearly the solo's she deserved, When it came time to pick someone for National's however, Rachel wowed the group with her rendition of an older Coldplay song she had remembered a week prior, and it was a unanimous vote that she sing it at National's in New York.
She felt weirdly nervous as she waited backstage, Finn staring at her a few feet away (he had recently decided he wanted her back once more, but this time she had fully moved on and was focusing on New York) but sang the words that had called her to the song in the first place quietly to herself.
The stage was bright and she had no chance of seeing anyone in the audience, so she had no idea if Jesse was there or not, though she had sent him an invitation. For all she knew, he had spent the year getting over her, which would only serve her right. Her eyes were closed as she sang the first few words, building momentum as she stayed on the stage, the song gaining more power through her voice. At the bridge, the curtains raised and the rest of the girls joined her in the background, the guys humming along behind them.
Once they were ushered off stage to a standing ovation, Rachel excused herself and claimed she needed to use the restroom as she headed for the front doors. If he had shown up, Rachel knew he would wait for her there. She wasn't sure how exactly she knew that, but she stood outside and shielded her eyes from the hot midday sun regardless, waiting.
"You were incredible," his voice finally said, and she spun around to see him-curls a little longer than she remembered, smile much wider.
"I'm sorry I kept you waiting," she said. "I was-scared, and young, and unsure of everything that I wanted."
He didn't answer right away, hesitating as the words formed in his brain. She fidgeted but kept her eye contact on him, biting her lip as she waited for his response. "I'd have waited forever," he finally promised, closing the gap between them and embracing her tightly.