Chapter One: To Go Back

"Rukia," Renji yelled knocking at her door. He Knew she was there so why wasn't she answering. It was either one of three options. One she was sleep, two she was watching Chappy the bunny off of an stolen high speed TV frequency, or three she just wanted to be left alone. Renji was about to continue knocking when she finally answered the door.

"What do you want Renji?" Rukia asked walking back towards her television. "Chappy The Bunny is on." 'Ah' Renji thought 'option two' as he walked over towards her. She was sitting down in her favorite chair that he had bought from the human world. Renji sat down on her bed, pulling her chair to turn towards him so that she was facing him.

"Do you know what tomorrow is?" he asked. He knew she didn't keep track of time anymore except when to report to duty and when not too.

"No" Rukia said confused. All she knew was that he was taking off to attend to some business in the real world. "Why, should I know?" She asked.

"Yes" Renji replied. "Tomorrow is the fifteenth… of July" Rukia gasped she knew this date, she knew this date too well. But it wasn't just the date it was who the date was associated with an that was the real problem.

"Tomorrow Is his Birthday, his 21st" Rukia said, suddenly not interested in the bunny's wonders on television.

"Yeah," Renji said. "And a bunch of us are going in honor of strawberry, me, Ikkaku, and even Toshiro and Rangiku are coming. So I was wondering if you wanted to come with us I mean you haven't seen him since you left."

Rukia looked out the window at the night sky to her left. How could he possibly know that, but then he did stay in contact with them in a way she refused too. But she couldn't, she just couldn't, he didn't want her back and she didn't want to go to anyplace she wasn't welcome. They weren't even friends anymore and from the things she had heard he was done with her. The thought of going back sent shivers done her spine. No she said to herself, I can't go back.

Renji saw she was deep in thought as if taking into consideration of what he was saying and so continued on.

"You don't have to decide right now, were not leaving until about three. The part starts at three thirty. Just think about it okay" Renji said pulling her face to look straight at him. Rukia looked into his eyes she could tell he really wanted her to come but she couldn't even if she wanted too.

"I can't" Rukia said. "My captain would never allo…," she tried to finish but was cut off by Renji.

"I already asked, he said it was fine with him and that you needed a break. Look all I'm asking is that you come to see strawberry, not to stay. Besides I wouldn't be insisting if it wasn't for Orihime, the girl can be scary when she wants to be." Rukia looked over at Renji shocked. Orihime wanted her to come? She watched as Renji stood up and walked to the door. He looked back at her then said, "Just think about it" then he was gone.

Rukia laid back on her bed. She couldn't go back, everything was fine, better than she expected them to be. He was living his life just fine without her, and going back would only bring up more memories and more human emotions. It had been four years since the day she left and she was just fine with that. She had coped to him not being there and fell out of love with him.

He didn't want her there but she couldn't blame him. She knew fully and wholly what she was doing, when she left, she knew things would change too. Orihime wanted her there that was always a plus and she was sure Isshin did too. But him, no. He had grown up, graduated from high school and was on his way to being a great surgeon the last time she checked.

She had changed, and so had he. And as the drowsiness of the day over took she thought to her self. "To go back, just to go back, was absurd."