How Could I Have Been So Stupid?
Sam woke with a start, the bright morning sunshine shining in through the gap in the curtains. She pulled the sheet tighter around her naked body, warding away the cold morning air. Sam looked around the bedroom she was in, noticing how neatly placed everything was, except for the items of clothing strewn across the floor after last night's activities. Sam laughed inwardly and rolled over to face her boyfriend, Josh Lucas, of 4 weeks. They had met in a bar a few weeks ago, but Sam hadn't told anyone about him, yet. After Stuart and Phil, Sam was hesitant – she didn't want a reputation of 'slut' spreading throughout the station. Sam's train of thought was interrupted.
"Morning gorgeous." Sam faced Josh and smiled.
"What are you thinking?" he asked.
Sam looked around the room, at her clothes, then at her fully clothed boyfriend.
"What happened last night?" The more she tried to recall last night's events, she couldn't. She remembered wine, and brandy. And she thought she remembered sex, but now she wasn't so sure.
Josh laughed loudly. "We had wine. Lots of wine. And brandy." Josh laughed. "You passed out in front of the TV, I carried you up here to bed, and I must have fallen asleep." He said, looking at the clothes he was wearing.
"I don't know how your clothes ended up on the floor."
Sam felt herself turn red. "But it doesn't bother me, waking up next to a gorgeously naked girlfriend." Josh planted a kiss on Sam's forehead.
Sam looked back at her clothes, before shaking her head and laughing. "I think I'm losing it." Sam's eyes caught the time on his bedside clock. 8.55.
"Shit!" She jumped out of bed and put her clothes back on in record time. She kissed Josh quickly.
"I'll call you later!" she yelled, running down the stairs. She flung his front door open, and rummaged through her bag until she found her keys. She opened her car door, threw her bag on the passenger seat, and drove away from the curb quickly, leaving skid marks on the road.
9.15. Sam looked away from her watch and headed straight for her desk. She opened the drawer and took two aspirin pills out, then downed them with a sip of water.
"Big night, eh?" Mickey dropped a folder onto Sam's desk.
"Mmmm. So what's this?"
"Kate Evans, 32, owns a salon down High Street. She opens the place this morning, and it's a mess. Computer's been nicked, the paperwork is missing and a few of the hair products are too."
Sam nodded. "Talked to Kate yet?"
"I was waiting for you."
"Well, let's go then." Sam headed out of CID, with Mickey in tow.
The afternoon passed slowly. After numerous interviews with Kate and her staff, Sam and Mickey were just about ready to give up. "We're not getting anywhere." Sam stressed to Neil.
"It's useless Guv. No one knows anything, there's no CCTV…" Mickey argued.
"Keep digging. You're not giving it up yet." Neil told them sternly, walking back to his office.
Mickey groaned angrily.
"Come on Mickey, let's go interview Tania again. She seemed like the weak link." Even though Sam was disappointed, she figured they had to do something.
"I just don't see why we're still working on this case, when we could be working with Phil and Stuart on the serial rapist case, where we might actually achieve something." Mickey said with a shake of his head, walking to the doors.
"Oi." Sam called after him. "What serial rapist case?"
"Phil and Stuart have been working on it. Four women in the past 3 weeks have come forward saying they've been raped, and they all have the same MO. Apparently he tried to kill one of them, but she got away." Mickey explained.
Sam was livid. "Now you see why I'm angry?" Mickey asked.
"Hmmp."
Sam sat on her couch, picking at her macaroni cheese. She had called Josh twice, and each time it had rang through to voicemail. Sam looked glumly at her meal. Knowing her luck in relationships, she had been dumped. Maybe it was because she passed out in front of the TV. Maybe it was because she woke up naked of her own accord. Sam shifted uneasily. It was very out of character for her, but then again she was drunk at the time. The phone ringing brought Sam out of her trance.
"Hello?" she anxiously waited for the person on the other end of the line to speak.
"Sam, hey, it's me." Sam sighed with relief as she listened to Josh talk. "I can't see you tonight. I've gotta work overtime tonight, and then start early tomorrow morning."
Sam's smile faded a little. "Oh."
"But I'll call you tomorrow as soon as I can."
Sam nodded. "Ok. Bye."
"Bye." He quickly hung up, leaving Sam with a 'call ended' beeping in her ear. She hung up the phone and turned off her TV, silencing the room. She headed up to her bedroom after turning off the lights and locking the doors, sighing heavily as she went.
Sam arrived at Sun Hill the next morning on time.
"Sam, good to see you on time this morning." Neil greeted her as she sat down at her desk.
"Seeing as there's nothing happening, now is a good chance for you to finish all your paperwork." He said, gesturing to the mountain of papers on her desk, before returning to his office. Sam looked at the numerous folders spread across her desk, not knowing where to begin, when the doors swung open.
"Any closer to finding the serial rapist?" She asked as Phil walked to his desk.
"We've got a lead, but another woman came in late last night saying she'd been attacked." Phil replied.
"That's five in three weeks Phil."
"Yes, thank-you Sam, but I can count."
Sam smiled despite herself and went back to her paperwork.
Stuart entered CID and nodded at Phil. "Brooke's ready to be interviewed."
"Right." Phil and Stuart walked out of CID, leaving Sam in the quiet office by herself.
"Good luck!" She called after them, but they were gone.
The morning passed quickly, with Sam engrossed in her work. Both doors to CID suddenly swung open, and Stuart and Phil appeared.
"Ok, you look him up on Crimnet, and I'll go back down and talk to Brooke again." Stuart told Phil. Phil moved to the computer without responding.
"New lead?" Sam asked, standing behind Phil looking over his shoulder.
"Yep." Phil typed the name in, and a fact-file quickly popped up.
"Josh." Sam read. "Lucas." The colour on Sam's face drained, and she felt dizzy. Phil read on, oblivious to Sam's reaction.
"Gotcha!" Phil announced triumphantly. "It even says here he's got form for rape, and GBH. Got out in 2002 on account of good behaviour." Phil snorted and shook his head.
Sam's stomach churned. "I feel sick." She whispered, barely audible.
Phil turned to face her, and noting her pale white face and demeanor , he figured something was wrong. "Sam, what is it?" he asked, concerned.
It all made sense to her now. Why he couldn't meet up with her last night. Why he was so neat all the time. Why she…the bile rose in Sam's throat…why she woke up naked in his bed while he was still fully clothed. "I'm sorry Phil." She blurted out hurriedly, before running out of CID, her hand covering her mouth.
Tears and vomit collected in the sink as Sam leaned over it. She felt as though her stomach was in her throat, and her heart had been ripped out. She coughed into the sink, heaving until she thought she would collapse. A million thoughts raced through her mind. How could she end up with a serial rapist in her bed? Why didn't she see it? He played her like a right fool, dating a copper who couldn't even see her own boyfriend was a rapist. And he had raped her. Sam's skin crawled, and she felt violated and dirty. She let out a huge sob, and coughed until she was sure her lungs were about to explode. She felt weak, and she felt herself falling. Her body fell against something solid, yet soft and warm. She looked up and gazed into soft blue eyes filled with concern. Phil Hunter.
"I've got you Sam, it's ok." He wrapped his around her fragile body, a little taken back at how vulnerable she seemed. Samantha Nixon was always the strong woman. He had only seen her as she now in Romania, when she thought they were about to die. And now, here she was, in his arms, being cradled like a baby or a little girl.
"How could I have been so stupid Phil?" she asked, the tears rolling down her porcelain cheeks.
"You're not stupid Sam. You're an intelligent, strong, beautiful woman."
Sam sniffed loudly. "What is it Sam? What does Josh Lucas have to do with anything?" Phil asked. He was genuinely concerned. Judging by Sam's reaction, it couldn't be a good thing.
"He's my boyfriend." Phil was shocked. He never in a million years would have guessed Sam was dating him.
"I…erm…I" Phil stuttered, lost for words.
"He raped me." The shock Phil had felt was still there, but now there was a stronger emotion evident.
"When?" He felt anger surge through his veins.
"Two nights ago. I woke up naked in his bed, but he told me I managed to undress myself." Sam broke out in a fresh wave of tears and sobs. Phil cradled her, never wanting to let go. He wanted to shoot Josh. He wanted to put him away to rot forever. He wanted to see him suffer like he had made Sam suffer. Phil wanted to go out into the world and make sure nothing hurt Sam ever again.
"It's ok Sam, we'll take care of it." Phil re-assured her. He stood up, bringing Sam to her feet, ready to face anything.
Phil and Sam walked back into CID a short time later. As soon as they did, Stuart started on Phil.
"Where the hell have you been? I've got Josh Lucas down in custody…"
Sam looked at Phil, seeming slightly panicked. He nodded at her, and gave her an 'it's ok' look, before silencing Stuart. Talking quietly, Phil explained Sam's circumstances, while Stuart nodded sadly.
"Sam, I'm so sorry." He said, engulfing Sam in a hug.
"It's not your fault." She replied.
"Let's go charge the bastard." Phil said angrily.
"I want to come." Sam stood up.
"Ah, Sam, I don't think…" Stuart started, but Phil interrupted.
"Sure."
"Thank-you." Sam smiled faintly. Stuart had a look of defeat on his face. "Fine, let's go."
Phil and Stuart walked ahead of Sam into custody. Stuart nodded at Smithy, who went to retrieve Josh from his cell.
"Are you sure you want to see him?" Phil asked Sam.
"Positive."
Phil nodded. "I'm right here if you need me." He re-assured her.
"Thank-you Phil."
Smithy brought Josh out into custody, and he set his sights on Sam. "Hello, sweetheart."
Sam's eyes narrowed. "Don't you 'sweetheart' me." She spat.
He smiled back sweetly. Sam snorted in disgust, turning away from him and walking back to CID. She had seen enough.
"You didn't seem to mind it the other night." He called after her.
Sam stopped walking, and slowly turned around to face him, her eyes glistening. "You son of a bitch." She hissed. He snorted and shrugged in response. Sam couldn't take it anymore. She couldn't hold the anger inside of her any longer. She ran at him, and managed to throw one punch before Phil restrained her.
"You bastard!" Sam screamed.
"Sam, keep…" Phil uttered, trying to hold onto her. She may be tiny, but was squirmy.
"How can you live with yourself?" she screamed. All the commotion had brought several officers around custody.
"Oh, shut-up Samantha, you were asking for it!" Josh yelled back, trying to get to Sam, but Stuart had restrained him as well.
"No woman asks to be RAPED!" Sam cried.
Josh's face turned into a sneer, his lip curling. "You were the exception."
Sam felt anger surge through her body, and she broke out of Phil's grip and started to attack Josh. "I'm going to fuc-"
Phil cut her off, grabbing her middle. "Sam, don't let him have the satisfaction." He told her.
She composed herself , and stood up straight to face Josh. "I hope you rot." She spoke coldly, before exiting with Phil at her side, all eyes on them.
Sam fell into her chair, the day's events tiring her. She buried her head in her arms on the desktop.
"Sam?" she looked up.
"Yes Phil."
"Do you want a lift home? I don't think you're in any state to be driving."
Sam nodded. "Thank-you. For everything." She told him.
"No problem. I'm always here for you Sam, you know that."
Sam smiled. "I know." She laughed quietly. "I don't know what I would do without you, Phillip Hunter." She said, softly kissing him on the cheek before she walked through the doors.
"Me either, baby." Phil grabbed his coat, and walked out of CID, following Sam.