The Cosmo Effect
This is set at the beginning of season 8, after the 8.2.
It was a quiet Wednesday afternoon. Leonard and Penny had gone out for the rest of the day so Sheldon was free to utilize the living room as he saw fit. Halo night had long been cancelled since each of the guys preferred to spend their time with their significant other and since the comic book store was not up and running yet, his schedule was clear. He had thought about watching some of his favourite shows but decided against that. He contemplated reading a book but even that didn't interest him that much. Then he looked down. There was a Cosmopolitan magazine sitting there on the glass coffee table staring up at him. From time to time, Penny would leave her choice of reading material in 4A, exactly why, he hadn't understood yet. Of course, he wasn't one to shy away from such trivial literature, if it could be considered that. He thought it was funny what some women actually believed and it had spurred him to read a few issues a while back when he was at a crossroads about his career.
He picked it up and noticed a page that had been dog-eared. Turning to the page immediately, he saw another compatibility quiz. He chuckled to himself as he thought about the 8.2 he and Amy had scored on an actual, scientifically proven test and decided that this one would be mere gibberish. Upon closer inspection though, he realized it was a physical compatibility quiz which Penny had taken with Leonard. Their score was quite high which shocked and appalled but more importantly, intrigued Sheldon.
First, with all the comments Penny has made over the years of Leonard's bedroom skills, he was shocked that they would actually score anything other than average. However, what appalled him was the fact that anyone, including Penny, would be able to get a high score on any type of quiz…no matter the subject! Sheldon always had to be one up on the rest...he had to be the brightest, the best…superior to all. He shook his head in disbelief.
Of course, it has never been in Sheldon's nature to be interested in partaking in the physical side of relationships but somehow things were different now. Ever since he kissed Amy on that train, his mind often wandered to that night. He thought about how soft and delicious her lips were. Everything that had preceded that kiss, as if by magic, had been wiped away. All the taunting and anger he felt going into that kiss dissipated instantly. Since then, he had been secretly plotting ways in which he would be able to indulge in those lips without revealing how he truly felt. He didn't want to tarnish his image by letting it be implied that deep down, he was indeed a hippy bursting at the seams. He had a reputation to uphold after all. He, therefore, casually added date night kisses to the relationship agreement. Unfortunately, even these were not enough to satisfy him any more. This magazine…this quiz would be the perfect cover up and no one would be the wiser. An ingenious plan it was!
He picked up his phone from the table next to the couch and started typing frantically, while he still had the nerve to go through with it.
-Amy, if you are not otherwise occupied, I was wondering if you would like to come over for an impromptu date.
He waited impatiently… a minute… two minutes …PING. She answered. He was hoping she would be available.
-How thoughtful of you to ask. I will be there in an hour if that's all right. Would you like me to bring anything? - She replied.
-No, I'll take care of dinner plans. See you in an hour. – He answered as a smile formed on his lips.
"Come to the flame my little moth…" he thought while smirking sinisterly and rubbing his hands together.
He took the liberty of ordering pizza since it would arrive faster than Amy. He wanted everything to be ready. He read through the quiz questions as he waited for the delivery, memorizing each and every detail.
About half an hour later, the pizza arrived which he placed on the kitchen island. He also put two plates and napkins on the counter. Dinner was ready.
Next he thought about the best place to conduct the quiz. The living room would be free for a few more hours hopefully but he wasn't willing to take the risk of being walked in on. He decided the best place would, in fact, be his bedroom. This frightened him a bit but his excitement for what was to come, superseded any and all inhibitions.
He paced the living room waiting for the twenty minutes to pass, quite possibly, the most enduring twenty minutes of his life.
Then he heard it…a subtle knock on the door. Finally, she had arrived. No sooner had he opened the door than he took her by the hand and started leading her towards the back of the apartment. Amy was dumbfounded.
"Sheldon…what's going on? Where are we going?"
"I'll explain everything shortly, for now…just come with me," he replied as he tugged Amy along to his room.
"Aren't we going to eat?" she asked curiously.
"Later," was all he replied.
She had no choice to oblige her boyfriend's odd request. She immediately thought that this was not going to be any ordinary Wednesday or date for that matter.
After about an hour, Amy came out of Sheldon's room all disheveled. Her hair was a mess and her glasses were askew. Her shirt was partly untucked and the buttons were not properly aligned. Even her cardigan was practically falling off her shoulders. She seemed to be in the zone as she approached the kitchen, still trying to take in all that had happened in the course of an hour. How her boyfriend, the all knowing and quite dexterous Sheldon Cooper, had assaulted her lips and neck with his lips. How his agile hands had caressed parts of her body that she had been craving for him to touch for quite a while now.
Unfortunately, during the course of that hour, Leonard and Penny had returned and were now a witness to Amy wading into the living room with her shoulders slightly hunched.
"Amy, what happened? What are you doing here?" Penny asked worriedly.
Amy turned towards her bestie who was now sitting upright on the couch. Her gaze was clouded but her grin wide as could be.
"Sheldon found first base…and second," she said still stunned as she was coming down from cloud nine.
Just then, Sheldon came out of his room wondering what was taking Amy so long to get the water bottles. His hair was all messy and he was wearing only one T-shirt, which happened to be on backwards. Leonard and Penny were astonished by the sight before them.
Sheldon looked at both of them sitting there on the couch. The couple's mouths were agape.
"Nobody scores higher on any test or quiz than me or us for that matter ," he said sternly as he shook his finger at them. Then he grabbed Amy's hand, looked at her and said in a softer tone, "We're not done yet…" as he led her back to his room. Before disappearing into the hall though, he yelled back to the couple in the living room, "And don't touch the pizza!"
Leonard and Penny just looked at each other speechless.
"What was that?" Penny asked in almost a whisper.
"I'm not sure but maybe we should go over to your place. With Sheldon you never know…" Leonard replied.
The end! :)
Hope you have enjoyed. I'm trying hard to keep you entertained during the hiatus. Let me know if it's working! Thanks in advance for any reviews and most of all for reading!