Episode 4: crap ma! My shoes are on fire: The case of the overextended, underlined sentences that have an overuse of commas and triple periods that create dramatic pauses,,,…
The dame walked in, strutting her flanky dress all over the place. You got mud on your face. Big disgrace.
"I got a job that needs your "special" talents…"
"could it have something to do with the pair of quotation marks inside that other pair of quotation marks?" I quickly responded, using the PI wits Ive built up over the years.
"no," she says, throwing herself on my desk and letting her crimson hair fall helplessly onto the new thesaurus I had just gotten from the bookstore across the street. You know, "Barnalby's Books and Things?" No? Anywhos:
"its about the thucking I gave you last week…"
"what?" Was all I could reply.
"choo know, thees vun." She said, referring to Ducklton, the rubber duck I had mysteriously obtained last week. You know, I had never noticed that accent before….
"whats the job?" I said, quickly changing the subject. Inconspicuously.
"I need choo to: WAKE UP! WAKE UP! Come on, Baku, I don't want to lose you!"
And of course, being a heavy sleeper, I woke up to the only thing powerful enough to wake me: a KJ slap.
"finally! Ive been yelling at you for a whole chapter!" KJ said, practically sarcastic, as the worry drained from her face and she discovered the pleasure of hitting me was greater than my safety. Typical KJ.
By now (hopefully) youre wondering, "What's KJ doing here? Wasn't she on house arrest? Why is Baku asleep? How did KJ find Baku? Why did I bother reading the other 3 chapters? Wheres my hamburger? I ordered an hour ago! Is Anna Nicole's baby's daddy really Larry Birkhead?"
Find out all this, and more, on the 5th installment of the new and improved Partners In Crime! Maybe well even get to some action!