A/N: Hey! Okay, this fic is indeed inspired by the Netflix series "13 Reasons Why" but not based on. By that I mean, I got the idea from that but this story does not follow that exact storyline but there will be similarities of course.
In this story Regina takes her own life. Emma is left to pick up the pieces and try to understand why. All of her answers arrive in a shoebox of audio cassette tapes, labeled from 1 to 13. As Emma listens to the story of the life of the girl she thought she knew, secrets are unveiled and it's up to her to decide what to do next.
Warnings for suicide, major character death, language, a tad bit CS (it's important to Regina's story), rape and a bunch of other triggers that I can't think of right now.
I plan to approach this as respectfully as I can. I understand this is a difficult subject for some, myself included. I will be very careful with this.
Caution again, this could be very triggering.
Even though Regina is deceased, it is still very much a SQ story.
Flashbacks are in italics, I own nothing and sorry for mistakes.
Enjoy. :(
Side Effects
Chapter One
She would rather be anywhere else but there. From the moment she stepped inside of Storybrooke Academy she felt overwhelmed. There was just too much going on and she was in no mood. Instead of turning around and running out of the door, she forced herself forward. She walked through the bustling halls and watched quietly as students moved around her. Some busy chatting away and laughing. Emma scowled at the passing girls. They looked at her with confused expressions. She rolled her eyes and continued on to her locker. Along the way she passed that locker... The one right next to hers. The one that was covered in cards, notes, flowers and other things, forming a makeshift memorial. Emma rolled her eyes again and angrily opened her locker. She grabbed her books for first period and slammed her locker shut. With a tired groan, she pressed her forehead against the cool metal of the locker. She sighed and pushed back the tears she felt building up. She inhaled and exhaled to calm herself. She just knew that if she ever started crying, she would never stop.
She couldn't believe that this was happening and everyone was going about their lives as if a beautiful soul hadn't just left this earth. She hated something but she didn't know what exactly. Life? Death? Misery? She hated whatever caused this. She balled her hands into fists and refrained from punching her locker. She opened and closed her hands as she gave herself one more moment then pushed off of the locker. She looked over and she almost jumped out of her skin.
There she was, alive and well with that cute little smirk on her red painted lips and those big brown eyes. Her was hair and makeup was perfect as usual. She was in a cute little black dress and matching pumps. Emma just stared. She couldn't move. Paralyzed was the proper term for it. The girl chuckled then. Emma couldn't tear her eyes away. She was there. She was...
A hand on her shoulder caused her to jump and spin around. She sighed heavily when she saw who it was. There stood her boyfriend. She often gagged at the word... boyfriend. It made her skin crawl. Well so did Killian Jones so that made sense.
"What's up, Swan, are you okay?" He asked. Emma just stared, she couldn't believe what she had just seen. She blinked a few times then nodded.
"Uh yeah," she sighed. "I was just..." She turned around to find her... gone.
Well of course she was. Regina Mills was gone.
She killed herself.
"Oh..." Killian said. He stepped around Emma and went up to the locker beside hers. He studied all of the cards and notes then looked back at Emma. For some reason she didn't want him near that locker. She wanted to tell him to get away but instead she bit her lip and waited. "That must be hard. You knew her, right?"
"She was my friend." She snapped. "She was my best friend and now she's gone."
Killian looked at her with sympathy in his blue eyes that were nowhere near as pretty or hypnotizing as Regina's chocolate ones. "Oh Swan..." He sighed. Then he did something that only made it worse. He stepped up and pulled her into his arms, hugging her much too tightly. Emma instantly felt trapped and the embrace made her feel uncomfortable. She wiggled out of his grasp.
"Just stop." She said. She then pushed away from him. He had that stupid confused look on his stupid face. She wanted to punch him in it. Hard. Instead she turned away from him and stormed down the busy hallway to her first period class, ignoring him calling after her. All of them cannot possibly be that dense.
Seriously, a girl died. She killed herself and yet they're all behaving as if she moved away or something. They don't understand that she's never coming back. She will not be attending any reunions, she won't post about her new school and life online. No. She is dead, six feet under. She was gone out of their lives forever. This was it for her.
No one can seem to wrap their heads around it.
Emma always thinks about what she would have said the last time she saw her if she had known. She wondered if she could have said something to change it but no. Emma simply nodded at her and kept going. She didn't say a word. She just wished that she would have stopped. She wished she would have hugged her. It had only been a few weeks and Emma was already forgetting what her voice sounded like, what she smelt like. She was losing her. Emma hated herself for that. She hated that she was letting her down again.
She pushed her wide rimmed black glasses up her nose and continued down the hall. In her haste she collided with someone nearly knocking them over.
"Oh sorry." Emma said quickly. She reached out, placing her hands on the girl's arms to steady her. The pixie haired girl looked into Emma's face and smiled sweetly. "Hey, Mary Margaret." Emma said with a smile.
Mary Margaret nodded. "You're in a hurry there."
Emma shrugged. "Gotta make it to class."
Mary Margaret furrowed her brows and looked down at her watch then back up at Emma. "The bell hasn't rang yet and you have plenty of time."
Emma shoved her hands into the back pockets of her tight light blue skinny jeans. She shrugged again. "Won't hurt to be early."
Mary Margaret nodded then adjusted her pink cardigan that was buttoned all the way up to the neck. "Yeah, suppose not." She looked over Emma carefully. She could see the pain all over her. Emma sighed. Mary Margaret was a very nice girl. She spent a lot of time with nuns down at the convent where she volunteers amongst other places. She somehow developed their beliefs. She even told Emma once that she wanted to be a nun when she finished school. Emma just shrugged and wished her luck. To each his own. "How are you holding up? I know you two were close." The dark haired girl asked finally.
Emma shrugged. "As good as someone could be doing after their friend hangs themselves in their closet."
Mary Margaret gasped and a hand covered her mouth. Emma rolled her eyes. Could she get any more dramatic? Mary Margaret removed her hand for a moment to reprimand Emma. "Emma, you are being disrespectful. Regina passed away and-"
"Mary Margaret," Emma sighed cutting her off. "Regina took her own life. Passing away is when you have no say in the matter. She killed herself."
Mary Margaret frowned and said nothing. Instead she stepped closer and hugged Emma. Emma tensed instantly. She didn't understand why everyone kept hugging her. Honestly touching just made it worse. She wished they wouldn't touch so much or hug so tightly.
In fact she wished they'd all leave her alone for a moment so that she could process and mourn in peace. Why did everyone think that asking if you were okay every two seconds would help?
Mary Margaret released Emma and gave her what Emma assumed must have been a comforting smile but Emma just found it to be plain annoying. Emma forced a smile as well hoping that would move it along so that it could be over. Mary Margaret began rubbing her arm. "Everything is going to be okay."
"Is it?" Emma asked as she stepped back. Without waiting for an answer she walked around Mary Margaret. Along the way, she saw the table. It came from one of the classrooms.
There laid across ir, were flowers and cards, teddy bears, notes and framed photos of Regina. It was a nice memorial but Regina would have hated it.
"Would you like to add something, Emma?" Mary Margaret asked softly from behind her. "It might help."
Emma looked over her shoulder at the girl and that annoying hopeful smile. "Regina already knew how I felt about her. Why would I give her roses now when I could have given them to her when she was alive to enjoy them?"
Then just like that Emma turned forward and continued to her classroom. Sure it was harsh but whatever. It's Emma's first time back to school after the loss of her friend. They should have tried to make it a bit better but all they've done since she stepped inside those doors was make it worse.
She just wanted to get through the day with whatever was left of her sanity.
Regina sat at her desk, perfect posture as usual. She was gazing out of the window. The sun was shining in on her, bathing her in a heavenly glow. Her dark hair was reflecting it and she looked like something other worldly. Emma was staring but she didn't care. How could she tear her eyes away from that?
Emma had wondered on more than one occasion what it would be like to make Regina hers. The girl was a goddess. She had seen plenty of pretty girls but none without flaws until Regina. She was absolutely perfect.
Emma was positive then.
She realized that she was staring at perfection. Those lips, those eyes, that smooth olive skin and Emma always swooned every time the girl smiled. Emma wanted her so badly but she was out of reach.
"Regina..." She whispered. Regina looked over at her with a small smile. Emma grinned. "Hey."
Regina's smile turned into a smirk. "You are such an adorable dork."
"Am I adorkable?"
"See." Regina whispered back. "Dork."
Emma raised a finger. "An adorable dork."
Regina rolled her eyes with a found smile. She then she turned back to the window and Emma went back to gazing at her. Enjoying the peacefulness of it all. When she was around Regina that's what she always felt.
Peace..
"Emma Swan!" A voice snapped. Emma woke up from her daydream. She looked up to see her history teacher staring at her.
"Yes, Ms. Blue?" Emma asked as she rubbed her eyes. The woman's eyes turned sympathetic then causing Emma to bristle instantly.
Here it comes...
"Are you okay, Emma?" The teacher asked. Emma groaned mentally. She could feel the woman's eyes on her, studying her. Emma shrugged.
"Fine."
Ms. Blue started to say something else but the bell rang. Emma sighed in relief. Saved by the bell. She gathered her things and all but sprinted out of the room before her teacher could pull her aside to 'talk'.
She's done talking. She didn't want to talk about it anymore with anyone. Talking doesn't change anything... Talking will not bring Regina back or that beautiful smile. Until it can resurrect the dead, Emma didn't want to be bothered with any of that dramatic shit.
She continued down the hall getting waves and nods from a few of the kids, she slung her black backpack over her shoulder and headed for the cafeteria. She was going to find some other place to eat lunch but she wanted to grab a water to go with her food so she headed for the vending machine. Ignoring the hustle and the bustle in the cafeteria, she walked up to the vending machine and put her money in. Her finger hovered above the button for the water then she grinned mentally when she selected a root beer instead. Regina hated when Emma made unhealthy choices when it came to eating. Although Regina herself was a sucker for root bear and chocolate.
That's why the two of them would always hang out on Friday nights after work and share a king sized Hershey bar with a couple of root beer. Well, they used to before Emma got too busy with her popular boyfriend and his popular friends. She frowned. What she wouldn't give for just a moment of that. A slight moment with her. Chocolate and root beer beat those pointless high school parties any day. Sucks it took her so long to see that.
Regina giggled as Emma turned the open sign to closed in the window of the old fashioned ice cream parlor. She locked the door and grinned at her dark haired friend. Regina shook her head. "You are such a dork, Ms. Swan."
She loved when Regina called her that. Emma grinned wide and bowed. "Thank you, my lady. Coming from you, that is a compliment." Then she straightened up and pushed her glasses up her nose.
Regina raised a brow. God, Emma loved when she did that. "That so?"
Emma wagged her brows causing her friend to giggle again. "Indeed." She slid her hands into the back pockets of her jeans and stepped a little closer to where Regina was sitting in a booth in the back. God she looked so cute in that white apron with the store's logo on it and that little white hat but then again, Regina would look good in anything. "Wait, I have something for you..." She said quickly.
Emma held up a finger then ran around the counter and disappeared into the back. A few moments later she returned to find a confused, yet amused Regina still perched at the booth. Emma held up two glass bottles. Regina looked even more amused and quite interested. "Is that a root beer?" She questioned lightly.
Emma grinned. "Two." She said as she removed the other one that was tucked underneath her arm. "I figured we could use a break before cleaning up and stuff."
Regina smiled then. The smile was so bright that it took Emma's breath away. "So pretty." She muttered.
Regina's brows came together and she frowned. She obviously hadn't heard her. "I'm sorry, what?"
Emma's eyes widened when she realized what she had said. She shook her head. "I asked, what do you say?"
Regina breathed out a chuckle. "Yeah." She nodded then. Emma nodded back happily. She sat one of the bottles down on the table and started to open the one in her hand. The cap wouldn't twist off and she groaned.
"I'll be right back." She said sitting the bottle down and heading to the counter again.
"Where are you going?" Regina called after her. Emma looked over her shoulder and saw the worried look in those pretty brown eyes. Emma sighed, feeling like a jerk.
"To get a bottle opener. I'm sure Ingrid... uh... my mom... has one." She explained. Regina bit her lip and nodded.
"Alright. Just don't take too long."
Emma nodded then slipped passed the counter. She waved at Regina causing the dark haired girl to shake her head with a small smile and wave back. With a small grin, Emma disappeared into the back of the shop again. She entered her... mother's office and looked through the drawers until she located the bottle opener. She then dashed back towards the front of the shop.
Regina looked over at her as she rounded the counter. Emma held the opener up high. "I found one."
Regina slow clapped. "The savior has saved the day once again." She teased.
Emma put her hands up in front of her. "Now now, there is no need to thank me, ma'am. I am merely doing my duty."
"Ma'am?" Regina giggled. "Come here, you idiot." She said playfully. She scooted over and patted the seat beside her.
Emma didn't have to be told twice. She gracelessly dropped into the seat. Regina rolled her eyes at that and Emma simply grinned. Regina smelled like apples, designer perform with a hint of strawberry ice cream. It was a nice combination. She always smelled so nice and Emma really liked that.
To keep herself from drooling over the girl beside her, she focused on the bottles. She pulled the bottles toward herself and opened one then handed it to Regina. Regina accepted it with a small smile. Emma opened her own and held her bottle towards Regina.
"To work mates and friends and a job well done." She said with a grin.
Regina laughed and clinked the neck of her bottle against hers. "You are such an adorable idiot, Emma Swan."
Emma chuckled as she took a swig from her bottle. She felt Regina bump her shoulder before she did the same.
"Swan!" Emma heard her name screamed. The sound brutally pulling her out of her memory. She spun around to face the intruder. There stood Killian Jones yet again, resident bad boy and asshole. "Hey Swan." He said happily. She just scowled at him. He snapped his fingers in front of her nose. "Earth to Swan."
Emma pushed his hand away. "Just stop it, Killian." She snapped.
He raised his hands in surrender. "Sorry Swan."
Emma sighed and turned back to the vending machine. She snatched her drink out of it. She turned back to him and shrugged. "Yeah. It's whatever." She said trying to sound a lot more chill than she actually was.
He nodded then and rocked on his heels. A gesture that Emma hadn't found annoying until now. "So... uh.. you wanna talk about it?"
Emma groaned. "No. Killian, I don't want to talk about it."
"So what do you want?" He asked stepping closer. He bit his lip in a gesture that Emma assumed was supposed to be sexy. While the only time she found that sexy was when Regina did it. With Killian it was annoying, like everything he did.
She didn't even know why she was with him. Oh yeah, she remembered.
"I want some time to myself." Emma explained slowly. "No one will leave me alone."
"But what about what I want?" Killian whined. Emma rolled her eyes. It was always about him. Emma's friend was dead and it was still about Killian Jones. The world revolved around Killian Jones.
She shrugged. "What about it?"
He sighed. "Come have lunch with us. Ruby misses you." Emma looked over at that lunch table. It was all the way in the back by the window. The usual suspects were there, the twins James and David, Ruby, Mary Margaret, Trina, and a few of James and David's jock buddies.
Emma didn't particularly want to talk to any of them. She looked back at Killian and shook her head. "Can't..." She said backing up towards the door. "I have to work on something in the library. An assignment. If I don't hand it in on time, I'll fail."
She turned on her heels and quickly walked out of the cafeteria before he could say anything else or worse, make it about him again. She ignored him calling after her and stepped through the doors that took her back into the hallway. She briskly headed for the library. She knew that she could get some peace there to enjoy her lunch and just be alone for a while.
She stopped at her locker. She kept her eyes on her own and didn't look at the memorial beside her. She was sure she'd lose it if she did. She threw in her backpack and grabbed the small red bag that held her lunch. She shut her locker and started on her way. She walked the quiet halls for a while until she heard voices chatting away. She stopped and waited.
The voices grew closer until she saw their guidance counselor, Mr. Hopper, turn the corner and head her way. The man was leading two people down the hallway. A man and a woman. The woman, Emma recognized as Mayor Mills. The town mayor and Regina's mother. The man, judging by his skin tone and Latino features must have been Regina's father. Emma had only seen him once when she had to go into the bakery he owned to get her mother a birthday cake. The man was nice but Regina's mom is a real hard ass.
You know, the tough love type.
She stopped and watched the people as they passed. They hadn't even noticed her as they walked over to Regina's locker.
Hey motioned to the locker and the memorial. "Some of the students have been adding to this. Regina is missed." He said.
Mr. Mills observed it. "That is very kind of them."
The mayor on the other hand was completely disinterested, clearly seeing through the phoney act of remembrance. Mr. Hopper frowned then turned back to the locker and tried to open it but the combination didn't work.
"Isn't there like a master key or something?" The mayor snapped causing the little man to flinch.
He tried the combination again, getting it open that time. "There was..." was all he said pulling the door open. "There you go."
The man and the woman stepped up to Regina's locker and Emma couldn't help but think how invasive it was. But that just made it all the more real. Regina was gone, nothing was a secret or personal anymore. Her world was now an open book to anyone and everyone.
"Where are her pictures?" Mayor Mills asked. She turned to the Guidance Counselor. He sputtered and shrugged. "All students hang pictures, stickers or magnets in their lockers to make it their own. There isn't even a mirror in here for make up. That's not like Regina."
The man shrugged again. "I have no idea, Madam Mayor."
The woman huffed and began gathering her daughter's things. Her husband who had been quiet for most of it helped her. The man didn't look too good but then again that was expected. They lost their youngest daughter after all. Emma looked like shit and that was her friend. Not that her pain was any less significant.
Imagine bringing someone into the world, staying up all night with them when they're crying, raising them and teaching them, experiencing their first smiles and steps. Watching them grow into a beautiful young woman, years of love then just like that your little ray of sunshine is gone.
That was a pain that Emma couldn't even begin to understand. What was her pain compared to theirs? If her world was falling apart, theirs must have crumbled away into ash.
She watched them for a moment as they gathered all of Gina's things and closed the locker. The mayor took a deep breath and thanked Mr. Hopper- for what exactly Emma was unsure. It's not like he did anything. Regina's father shook the man's hand then they were on their way.
Emma didn't want to be seen by them because she didn't want to say anything to them so she quickly slipped around the corner before she was seen. What the hell could she have said to them? What words could she string together to bring those mourning parents comfort?
Silence was best. So that's what she did. Stayed quiet.
The couple passed her and kept walking with the books gathered in their arms. They hadn't even noticed her and she was thankful for that. She watched them exit the school, heading towards the parking lot. Probably heading home, to a home with no Regina. That made Emma want to cry and scream but instead she composed herself. She inhaled deeply then exhaled. She then continued on to the library.
She made it without further incidents. She stepped inside of the softly lit room and was glad to find that there weren't many people there. She walked on, passing kids who were too engrossed in their homework or books to look her way. She was thankful for that. That's exactly what she needed.
She took a seat at a table all of the way in the back. She let out a sigh at finally having some alone time then went about unpacking her lunch. She grinned at what she found. A corned beef sandwich, cupcake and chips. Emma shook her head. This is her mother trying to cheer her up and you know what, it almost worked. She unwrapped her sandwich and was just about to dig in when a voice from behind her cut in.
"Hey, Emma..."
Emma sighed and lowered the sandwich. She turned around to see none other than, Belle French or Bookworm as Regina used to affectionately call her.
"Hey Belle." Emma said as Belle began to come around the table. The girl looked adorable as usual with her cute little dress and shoes. Her brown hair was curled and free. She had a stack of books in her arms.
She smiled warmly at Emma. "I don't see you here too often."
Emma shrugged. "Yeah..." She muttered and went to open her soda. It hissed satisfyingly. She took a long drink, enjoying the sweet burn.
"You know, Regina used to love it here." Belle said softly and Emma looked at her. She could see it in her bright blue eyes. She was hurting too and not the 'oh, I'm so sad, look at me crying so I could get attention' pain but no, actual pain. Sincere pain. "I miss her." She said quietly. She shrugged a little. "To her I wasn't just the nerdy girl. I was her friend."
Emma frowned. To think that Regina was in so much pain herself but she took the time to make someone else feel like something. That broke Emma's heart even further. "Yeah she was like that." She said softly.
Belle nodded. She placed a hand on her shoulder and squeezed. Belle's touch wasn't uncomfortable but actually soothing. "I see you're having lunch and I don't want to interrupt much further." She pulled her hand away. "Take care, Emma and if you ever want to talk, you know where to find me." Then just like that, she left Emma alone.
Emma turned back to her lunch. She lifted her sandwich again. Why can't everyone be like Belle? She thought before she took a bite.
The rest of the day went by in a blur. She had a few more classes after lunch but even though she was present physically, she was absent mentally. All she could think about was Regina. That smile, those eyes. Her perfect hair and figure. Her sometimes cruel but hilarious sense of humor. The way she loved to tease Emma. Emma missed her friend and that's all her brain let her focus on.
The little flashes of the girl didn't help either. She saw her everywhere. In the hall, in her classrooms. She always looked beautiful and radiant. That's how Emma wanted to remember her. The vibrant girl before the world snuffed out her light.
Emma just wished she would have known that she was hurting. It partially hurt that Regina didn't reach out to her, that she didn't trust her enough to tell her what was going on. Emma would have crawled on glass and onto salt for Regina. She just wished that she would have understood that. She probably would have been alive now.
The final bell rang signalling the ending of the school day. Emma was relieved that she managed to make it through despite all that was going on. She quickly grabbed her things and slipped out of the classroom before the teacher could say something to her about her slacking off. She slipped into the busy hallway and made a beeline straight for her locker. She quickly grabbed her things and tried to slip out before any of her friends saw her.
She headed for the door and managed to escape before being caught. She jogged down the steps and stopped in front of the school. She inhaled the fresh air. She just had to be out of there. Away from it all. She looked up at the sky. It was a nice sunny day. The sky was clear and there was a nice breeze, perfect day for a walk.
Before she could take one step she heard the beep of a car horn. Emma looked over and saw the smooth blue hummer that Emma knew that belonged to the twins. Or one of them. She watched the window roll down. James' head popped out.
"Hey Swan, let's go hang." He said.
Emma shook her head. She would rather drink acid. "Nah, I have homework and my mom might need help at the shop."
The back seat window rolled down. "Come on, Swan!" Killian said.
"Yeah, Swan." Ruby chimed in.
Emma shook her head. "Next time."
They all whined. "Come on, Swan!" Killian pleaded.
Before Emma could say anything else, an old rusty black pick-up pulled up to the curb. She looked through the window and was relieved to see her buddy Graham.
"Graham..." She sighed.
"Hey, Em." He said in his smooth accent. "Need a ride?"
Emma shrugged. "Just home..."
Graham nodded. "Yeah, sure, hop in."
Emma sighed in relief and smiled. She really liked Graham and trusted him. He would definitely be better company. She waved to her friends then walked over to Graham's truck and got in. When she finally shut the door behind her, she sighed and relaxed back against the seat.
Graham pulled off and they began driving in the direction of Emma's house. The ride was mostly quiet and Graham had put on some old soft rock songs. He loved music from the eighties and Emma found it hilarious and a little great. It was definitely helpful in a time like that.
"Long day?" He asked as they turned a corner onto another street of their small town of Storybrooke, Maine. The town was very quiet and sleepy but rumors spread like wild fire because everyone knew everyone. Emma couldn't wait until she got out of there. She was a junior so not long now.
"You have no idea." She replied.
Graham hummed but decided not to press it. He already knew. Emma appreciated that he never pried. "No bug today?"
Emma sighed and continued to watch their town roll by. "My mom drove me. She said 'we needed to talk'." She made quotation marks with her hands on the last part.
Graham chuckled. "And how did that go?"
Emma sighed. "Well she did all the talking. It was more like rambling actually."
Graham snorted. "It's a mom thing, I suppose."
Emma looked over at him with a smile. The first sincere smile she had all day. "Lets do better than them when we're parents."
Graham laughed. "Deal."
Emma smiled and turned back to the window. She watched the streets that Regina used to walk pass by. It was an odd feeling losing someone.
It's like they were here and now they aren't. It's like there's all this evidence of their absence but your mind still cannot wrap itself around the idea of them being actually gone from your life. It's surreal. You want it all to be a joke or a prank and you constantly wait for a phone call from them or for them to pick up when you dial their number or even for them to pop up at your place and it doesn't happen. But you're still waiting.
Emma pulled her phone out of her pocket and scrolled through her texts. She found her conversations with Regina and their last ones.
Regina: Emma, I'm sorry.
Emma: Its cool. Don't press it.
Regina: Emma...
Emma: Regina, I'm not mad. Just let it go.
Regina: K...
Emma said nothing else then because she was angry with Regina, she was angry with herself. She was just angry about what had happened. She continued to scroll. They didn't talk much after that but a few days later there was another text from Regina.
Regina: Hi
Emma: Hi.
Regina: Hru?
Emma: Good.
Regina: Oh
Regina: So, wyd?
Emma: I'm actually a bit busy. I'll text you when I'm free.
Regina: Ok.
Emma groaned mentally. What an idiot. She never messaged Regina back. A few days later, Regina died. So Emma never got to reply. She never got to say what she really wanted to say. What she needed to say. She was too busy being an asshole. What she wouldn't give for a second chance so she could tell her. Tell her that-
"Here we are." Graham said as they pulled up in front of Emma's big eggshell blue house. She looked up from the phone and eyed the place. She really didn't want to go in there. She didn't want to be alone in that big house but she knew her mother was at their shop.
"Thanks Graham. I really appreciate this." Emma said turning back to her friend. Graham smiled and placed a hand on her shoulder. Her gave it a squeeze.
"Any time, Em." He said seriously. Emma saw it in his eyes that he was telling the truth. She nodded then and climbed out of the car.
She waved at him then walked up to the gate and let herself in. She let it slam behind her and walked up to the house. She jogged up the steps to the porch, and went to pull out her keys but her eye caught something on the ground, placed perfectly on her welcome mat. It was a rectangular package, wrapped in brown paper. She picked it up, figuring that it was for her mother then unlocked her door. Before she stepped inside she heard the horn honk and she turned to see Graham pulling off.
She shook her head with a small smile as she walked into her house and kicked the door closed behind her. To say that she was exhausted was an understatement. She kicked her shoes off and dropped her bag on the floor, kicking them aside she headed to the kitchen for a snack. After a snack there was to be a nap.
Entering the kitchen she dropped the box on to the counter. She looked it over and realized that there was no name on it. In fact it was completely blank. She lifted it up and turned it over in her hands. Yep, blank. She furrowed her brows and now she was extremely curious. Interest piqued and exhaustion long forgotten, she looked through the drawers for a knife. She quickly located one and began cutting through the brown paper.
She ripped the rest away and saw a shoe box. She frowned why would...? She lifted the lid and became even more confused. There were pieces of paper. She lifted a purple one, unfolded it and read the small note, it said, 'Don't ask, don't think, just listen.'.
Confused, Emma looked down into the box and saw a row of cassette tapes. She lifted one up, it read, 'One' on the front in dark purple marker.
Emma didn't know what to do... how the hell was she going to listen to cassette tapes in 2017? It's not like she had a... She cut off her own thoughts. She dashed out of the kitchen, slid across the floor in her socks and darted up the stairs. She flew down the hall to the door that led to the attic. She flung it open and ran up those rickety wooden stairs to the dark dusty room.
Flicking the light on, she set about looking through the boxes. She remembered one time when she was helping Ingrid clean out the attic the woman had showed her a walkman. At the time Emma laughed but now she needed it. She went through box, after box, after box until she located the box of Ingrid's 'high school memories'. Emma opened it. The box was filled to the top. She quickly moved aside her mother's old cheerleading uniform, yearbooks and other things before she found it.
Emma sighed in relief and lifted it up. She hoped the little black and pink thing still worked. She blew the dust off and stood. She turned it over and saw that there was a place for batteries. She opened it and it was of course empty. Obviously after decades. Emma bit her lip and shot out of the room. She shut the door behind her and made her way back downstairs.
If she needed batteries she knew where to find them. She ended up back in the kitchen and went through the junk drawer. There she located a pack of batteries. She quickly opened them and tried to put them in. It took her a few tires but eventually she figured it out.
Okay that's done, so headphones... She had a pair of headphones in her room. She gathered all of the items that came in the box, closed it up then headed upstairs. When she entered her room she headed straight for her desk. She sat the box down next to her laptop and picked up her black and gold stereo headphones.
She went over to her bed and plopped down onto it the way that Regina hated. Okay how does this work? She thought. With a shrug she pushed down on the first button. The little tray opened so Emma inserted the tape. After shutting the tray, She plugged her headphones into what she assumed to be the headphone jack and put them on her head.
She hesitated for a moment. She had no idea what she was going to hear. Hell, she didn't even know where the box came from. But then again whatever was on that tape couldn't have been worse than what she had been going through. She inhaled then exhaled. She had to be brave. Besides her curiosity was getting the better of her.
After counting to three in her head she pressed the button with the little play symbol on it. Her eyes scanned her room as she listened to the tape running. She could feel her heart pounding in her chest with anticipation. Her mind was racing a mile a minute and she couldn't get herself to calm down.
After what had felt like hours but was actually a matter of moments something happened. A voice came through Emma's headphones.
"Hey." The voice said smoothly. Emma's brows came together. Her palms started sweating and she could hear her heart beating in her ears. She knew that smooth sultry voice. It was... "Its me Regina. Regina Mills."
Emma gasped. The walkman fell out of her hands and hit the floor.
Thanks for reading!
Btw, in case you were wondering Trina is Tink. You'll see.
I'll explain the Ingrid/Emma thing as well.