Summary: Bella Swan is a homicide detective in the rough streets of New York. Madly and secretly in love with her partner, Edward Cullen, she finds herself confused between doing her job and following her heart. When a high profile murder case hits Bella and Edward close to home and shakes these two's foundation. They find that the only people they can trust are each other. Thrown into a web of betrayals and deceit, they begin to realize that solving murders is no longer just their job…their lives depend on it.
DISCLAIMER: All rights of the characters of Twilight belong to Stephenie Meyer.
Chapter One
New York was a tough city. The cold streets were overwhelmed with people…some were good, but majority were bad. After while the numbness sets in and nothing really seems to shock you. The endless array of gang bangers, rapists, thieves, prostitutes, and murderers, one tends to forget the beauty that surrounds New York.
When I arrived in the city, I was just a baby. Fresh faced and barely nineteen. Who knows why I wanted to be a cop—let alone a homicide detective. The reasons behind my decision were beyond me and my parents were a little confused by my choice. They hoped that if the law was going to be my choice profession that I would've chosen to be a lawyer or at least something along the lines that didn't require a bullet-proof vest and a gun.
Parents were so over-protective.
In their eyes, being a cop was just like being a soldier. The sudden death of my brother, Seth, over in action in Pakistan, rocked my parents to their core. They didn't want to lose another kid and they pleaded with me to take another path in life.
It wasn't like they disrespected the profession, in fact, they thought very highly of people who did this line of work. They just didn't want their baby girl being a part of it.
Where there were small towns there were small minds.
That was another reason why I wanted to get the hell out. My potential was wasting away in Forks, Washington and I needed to be free of the expectations of that life. The sudden engagement to my high school boyfriend had scared the shit out of me. The idea that my life was planned out for me was like putting that last nail in my coffin.
I felt bad for what I did to Jacob, but I needed to expand my wings…I needed a life.
New York was my escape and when I arrived there, I was wide-eyed and impressionable. Well, to put it simply, I was fucking naïve. Two days into my new life, I was robbed at gunpoint and I was reminded just how dangerous being unaware of your surroundings truly was.
The incident petrified me and nearly destroyed my resolve. The felt the urge to flee the city, run back home and face my pathetic defeat was overwhelming, but then something came over me. The voice of my mother was what stopped me from making the ultimate mistake and I heard her loud and clear.
"I told you that New York was a huge mistake, Bella and you never listen to me."
The truth was that I rather be robbed a million times before crawling back to my parents. It didn't matter if this city killed me in the end. It was going to be on my terms and fuck everyone else.
Well, that was five years ago, and ironically, I haven't been robbed since.
The fear of the streets no longer holds me and perhaps that's naïve of me, but I've seen my fair share of horrors. The people I come across taint my perspective on a lot of things and I find myself calling my parents in hopes to retrieve some of that humanity in me. It's the only way to keep my sanity and warmth intact.
Otherwise, where the hell would I be?
The streets of New York are cold and they can harden a person without even batting an eye.
The weekly calls to my parents are both my savior and my headache. I can't even talk to my mother for five minutes without her mentioning Jacob or hounding me about my dating life. She's determined to marry me off, and I don't know what the hell I did to her, but obviously it must've been horrible. She's so consumed with me finding Mr. Right and that just irritates the shit out of me. Especially since I have a hard enough time trying to find me a Mr. Right Now.
Dating wasn't part of my vocabulary. In all the years I've been in New York, I've managed to make myself a social pariah. The club scene in my first year was…stupid. First of all, I felt way out of place. There were girl who dressed in skimpy attire and flaunted their assets—those were the ones who got the guy. The ones who sat in the back of the bar, nursing their Bud Light, and scowling at every man who approached her was the one who went home alone…and I did.
The only men I've ever seriously tried to date over the few past years were cops and that was just a pointless fucking venture on my part. These types of guys were the same. They never back down in a fight, have a horrible sense of time, and refuse to admit when they are wrong.
It was like dating the male version of me and mixing the same type of breed never works.
So, I bowed my head in shame and accepted that I was doomed to die alone…tragic, I know.
The only man I had any time for was my partner, Edward Cullen. He was the one assigned to me my first day on Homicide. He and I were as thick as thieves from day one and we even lived together for a year or so. He helped me get over the horrible guys I dated and I made fun of all the girls he slept with. It was an easy friendship and we were like minded in a lot of ways. He finished a lot of my sentences and I was the only one who got his lame ass jokes.
We worked well together...it was like we were soul partners.
The only problem was that Edward was gorgeous and it was quite the conflict of interest for me. I mean, how can I not be in complete awe of this man? The chaotic, sex hair of his was always in disarray and was the oddest shade of bronze I'd ever seen. It looked almost unnatural, but he swore up and down on his dead nana's grave that it was real. It was hard to disagree with him, especially when he stared at you with his intense green eyes. It was insane how deep green they were and I'm not proud to say that I've lost my train of thought a few times.
However, things were complicated and we both agreed not to take our relationship there. The one and only time that line was ever crossed was when he acted like a jackass and tried to kiss me. In all honesty, I would've welcomed his advances in a heartbeat, but at the time I was dating a guy in the narcotics unit named Mike Newton, and being the loyal girlfriend, I denied Edward's lips. It was one of the smartest and stupidest things I'd ever did because Mike and I broke up a few weeks later, and I often wondered what it would feel like to be with Edward…I mean, really be with him. By the time I've realized the mistake I made, it was too late. Edward and I were too good of friends and I was afraid to ruin that.
That's how my life goes though. It was filled with missed opportunities…
Hmm, maybe I should get a haircut…and some highlights.
"Earth to Swan," Edward's melodic voice pulled me out of my reverie.
Glancing away from my computer, I looked over at him and saw him smiling me with a crooked grin. There was amusement in his eyes and it was quite obvious that I was off in la-la land again.
We were at the station, working late on a case and busting our ass trying to solve the latest pimp killing. Edward had been throwing out stupid ideas all night. He went on an hour and a half tirade about a revengeful prostitute. However, it was most likely just a drug deal that gone bad, but he was hard to be swayed. He was a stubborn jackass and we argued about our difference of opinion for about twelve hours straight.
Eventually, I just ended up tuning him out.
"Swan?" I asked offended, narrowing my eyes at him. "What the hell is that about? You never call me by my last name."
"Well, you're driving me nuts and I figured by calling you Swan that it would drive you nuts," he said proudly.
I leaned back in my chair and sighed heavily. It was almost three in the morning, I was tired, grouchy, and looked for blood and Edward was looking like the perfect target. We were getting nowhere and I needed a break.
"Fine," I groaned, irritated.
"What?" he asked confused.
"You win, Cullen. He was killed by a vengeful hooker. I'm going home."
In the end, I was the one who cracked first in our little fights.
"Awe, Bella." He smiled. "Don't leave."
"Edward. We've been here for almost eighteen hours and what have we determined? Nothing. He's still dead and we have no leads. Give me a good reason as to why I should stay?" I questioned tiredly, pulling my jacket off the back of my chair.
"Well, in about an hour I am stripping down to my Joe boxers," he said, smiling coyly.
"I said give me a good reason."
Edward looked up at me with a wounded expression. His perfect lips were all pouty and he looked pretty kissable, but I knew better. Edward had an ego as the size of Texas. All he was doing was trying to pull me in with the pity card, but I was exhausted and bored of the situation. Nothing Edward said or did was going to change that.
"Ugh, stop that. We'll see each other in a few hours. We'll grab some coffee and discuss this when I have a clearer mind and don't want to kill you so much. Kapeesh?" I smiled weakly.
"Okay," he said begrudgingly. "I still love you, though."
"Mm-hmm," I said, waving over my shoulder as I walked out of the station, bound for home.
***000***
"No, Mom, I haven't been dating. No, Edward is not seeing anybody…that I know of. Mom…Mom…Listen, I'm fine. I'm eating and I'm happy. Mom, I gotta go, okay? Seriously…okay…bye, Mom," I said hastily, hanging up and her and chucking my twenty dollar cell phone across the room.
That woman was insane and she drove me up the freaking wall. Why couldn't she give it a rest already? When I talked to my dad, he was always so easy going and asked me logical questions like: How was the weather and have they found Jimmy Hoffa yet? My mom on the other hand was like freaking Jeopardy and you must answer in a form of a question.
She certainly knew how to ruin a perfectly good day and it sure as shit didn't help with my plan to be clear minded. What the hell was Edward going to think when I showed up all bitter and pissed for our coffee date? All he was going to hear from me was how evil and horrible my mother was.
He'll love that…like an ulcer.
However, Edward was the least of my concerns right now. Before my mom called me, I got a frantic call from my best friend, Alice. She was the chief's wife and six months pregnant with their first child. She just found out from the doctors that there was an abnormality with the ultrasound and blood work of the baby. They told her that there was a possibility of her miscarrying or if she went to full term the baby might come out mentally handicapped.
This was such heartbreaking news because Alice and the chief have been trying for so long for a baby, but now she's wondering if bringing a child into this world whose life might be harder than has to be is worth her selfish need to be a mommy.
She's scared and promised me to secrecy to not tell her husband. Even though I think he's has a right to know about this, I understand where she's coming from. There's a huge decision she must make about whether or not she should keep the child.
I couldn't even tell Edward about this. All he would freak out if he knew what Alice was trying to hide from Jasper and go all male on me…
Opening the door to the coffee shop, I noticed that Edward was in the far back corner and chatting it up with a cute blond. A ping of jealousy struck me in the core of my gut and I was overcome with these irrational thoughts.
Did he find her funnier than me?
Did he think she was pretty?
Did he even notice that I am late?
Did he care?
My feelings had attacked me out of nowhere and I didn't even know how to respond to them. It wasn't like me to get all insecure and jealous over a girl that Edward was seeing. He dated a lot…but then again, he never chatted with a girl when he was supposed to meet me.
When Edward and I were together, it was just the two of us. No one else existed in our little happy bubble, but now he was completely oblivious to me and all over this person.
Get it together, Bella, I mentally chastised myself.
Slowly making my way over to them, I rushed to get my feelings in check. The last thing I wanted to do was bum rush them like a jealous girlfriend, demanding to know what the hell was going on. I wanted to be the best friend who was supportive and genuinely happy. Hell, I wanted to be the big sister or the cool chick that didn't get all flustered when their hot partner was talking it up with some bimbo.
However, the moment I got to their table, I knew my plan was going to fall apart. The sight of Edward laughing as he sipped on his God damned latte and rubbing his hand up and down the slut's arm was fucking devastating. It killed me to watch them openly flirt with each other. The blond flipping her thick hair over her shoulder and making a giggling noise every time she thought Edward said something funny.
It was disgusting.
I'd been standing there for a full minute before either one of them noticed me. I mean, Edward should've seen me... I was standing directly in front of the jerk.
My anger continued to rise the longer I stood there unnoticed. The murderous thoughts that went through my mind as I listened to her were running wild. I wanted to rip off her pretty little head and feed it to my old pit-bull, Sinclair. It wasn't logical thinking and I was getting a little irrational, but Edward was mine in a way. This unknown girl was stepping in on my territory and people who trespass get bit.
Just as I was about to unleash my wrath, Edward looked up at me and smiled. "Hey, Bell."
The blond looked over her left shoulder and up at me. She smiled brightly and never glancing away from my intense gaze. The bimbo was probably used to having woman giving her the stink eye and had grown very numb to it.
In fact, I bet she's dated married men all of her life.
Keeping my eyes on her crystal blues, I started to assess my competition. She looked very young to me and was probably eighteen—if that. It was pretty appalling. Edward was twenty-eight years old and he was picking up twelve year olds.
"Hello," I finally replied through my clenched teeth.
"Jessica, this is Bella. She's my partner," Edward introduced.
Jessica's eyes brighten with relief as she registered that I wasn't his wife…typical. She sighed as she reached out for my hand. I looked at it like it was diseased and like I might catch cooties if I was to shake it.
"Bella, this is Jessica. We just met," Edward continued with the introductions, fully unaware of my distaste. "Hey, did you know that Jessica is attending NYU?"
I was right. She was a baby.
"It's nice to meet you, Bella. Edward has been talking about you all morning," she rambled. I smiled smugly, looking over at him. "Is it hard being a female cop?"
I faked a smile. "Yeah, it is…seeing as I am the first woman cop in history."
Edward narrowed his eyes at me. It was pretty clear that I was being rude to his new gal pal 'Jessica' and somehow that didn't set well with him. But she was an idiot. The more off the wall questions she asks the ruder I was going to get.
"Wow. That is so wild," Jessica said, impressed.
"Ain't it?" I asked sarcastically.
Jessica's smile slowly faded as she realized that I was making fun of her stupidity. She looked away from me and back over at Edward. "Excuse me; I have to get back to work. Call me."
She slid of the stool and I immediately took her seat. She stood there awkwardly as I glared at Edward, waiting for me to acknowledge her again. Finally after a few moments, I shot my heated gaze up at her and she stepped back, a little confused.
"Um, can I get you something?"
I grabbed Edward's latte and sniffed the contents, and without ever looking at her, I snapped. "I'll have whatever he's having. Thank you."
The click clacking of her heels got further away and when I looked back up, I was happy to see that she was gone. Glancing over at Edward, I saw that he was pissed. I sat back in my seat and waited patiently for my apology, but with the look in his eyes, I doubted that was going to happen anytime soon.
"Are you proud of yourself?" he asked angrily.
"Quite. How old is she, Cullen?"
"She's eighteen, why?"
"Ugh, that's disgusting. Can't you get a girl your own age?" I retorted, fucking sickened.
"Oh, I'm sorry; Saint Bella, but I don't see how any of this is your business."
"It's my business because…I…Well, it's because, um," I stuttered.
He nodded. "Yeah, that's what I thought."
"It's because I'm your partner," I said, snapping my fingers.
"You're my partner at work, Bella. Not my partner in life, you got that?" he spat as he stood up and slammed a ten on the table.
Shocked and hurt by his comment, I stared at him with my mouth agape. The truth was bitter and it pained me. He never spoke to me so harshly before, and I've done some stupid things. It confused me as to why he was getting this upset over a girl he just met. In my honest opinion, I didn't really see a future there. He was a lot older than her for starters and they were both in two different places in their life.
I mean, I was the girl he was supposed to be with…me.
Unfortunately, I was too afraid to make that kind of commitment with him.
"That was…" I started.
"It was the truth." Edward finished. "Let's go."
It was the truth that I never wanted to hear as I watched him as he headed for the door, waving to Jessica as she stood behind the counter, and walked out into the cold, wintery street.
***000***
When we got back to the station, Edward still wouldn't talk to me. This argument of ours was so immature and pointless. Admittedly, my actions weren't exactly epitome of maturity, but I already apologized for that. Therefore, he needed to forgive me and move on.
However, I knew Edward better than he knew himself and I already could see him dragging this shit on and on, and never let me forget it.
He was such an asshole sometimes.
The moment we walked into the station we saw that it was abuzz with activity and busier than usual. It was complete madness and everyone was running around the office like chickens with their heads cut off. Edward looked back at me concerned, and I shrugged my shoulders.
"There you guys are," a familiar voice rang over the madness.
Rising on my tippy-toes and saw the Chief was waving both of us over to his office. Edward gripped a hold of my hand and proceeded to wedge us through the crowd. I felt a warm sensation in my body, happier than I should've been by the chaste contact, but it wasn't something that I could control. It was just nice to know that Edward was willing to drop the fight sooner than I thought he would.
As soon as we got in the Chief's office, he smiled weakly and nodded us in. The chief closed the door behind us and turned down the shades. Edward and I took our seats in front of the desk, watching the Chief pensively as he paced the room.
The stress was written all over his face and I was starting to get anxious.
What the hell was going on out there? Was there a big murder that we didn't know about?
"Did you two notice the craziness going on out there?" Chief asked.
"Yeah. What's going on?" I pried.
"The DA is on their way down here," he replied sadly.
"Ah, shit," Edward swore, jumping from his chair and paced the room along with the Chief.
The DA's office was always up our ass. They would come in looking for cops gone bad, people smuggling drugs from the narcotics department, and then if that failed, they would sit and bitch about our work space. It was ludicrous that they would dock the department based on how clean my desk was, but they did. It was fucking chaos every time they came and Edward was the worst. He kept snacks in his desk drawer and he feared that they were going to write him up or possibly take the snacks away…it all was just funny to me.
"What time are they coming?" I asked coolly.
"How can you be so calm about all of this, Swan?" Edward shouted at me.
That fucking name again…it was starting to become hurtful.
"Just hold on a minute," I replied in an offended tone.
He kept his hateful gaze on me and I wanted to fade away.
"Okay, I think we're getting off track here," the chief muttered.
"I can't believe you're still pissed over that, Cullen. I'm sorry that I believe that you deserve better than that girl, but that has nothing to do with the situation now!" I yelled furiously.
"Are we still talking about the DA?" the chief asked confused.
"It's nothing, Chief. She's a woman. Self explanatory," Edward said coldly.
"You're an asshole," I fired back as I got up from my seat and headed towards the door.
The fight was getting ridiculous, and frankly, it was becoming embarrassing. I couldn't believe that it got to the point where we were fighting in front of the Chief. It was looking like we were having some lovers quarrel and lovers we were not.
I can't believe that he wouldn't let it go. He was acting like a pig-headed jerk and that chauvinistic comment he made to the Chief was taking the shit too far. We were both way too old to be fighting like children and we needed to grow the hell up.
Plopping down at my desk, I decided to straighten it a little. The DA never had any issues with me, but I figured it never hurt anyone to organize, and I needed a distraction. Everything today was being blown out of proportion: From my response to cute, bubbly blonde 'Jessica' to Edward's reaction to my reaction and then the whole DA visit—especially since they stop by the station every year. You would think that people would be used to things by now. Everyone knows the DA's drill…just fucking follow the rules.
It's pretty scary when I'm the calmest person around.
However, this was the first year Edward's been spiteful and mean towards me.
After ten minutes of my rearranging my pens, Edward finally came out of Chief Whitlock's office. He sat in his chair across from me and stared aimlessly at his computer. Not once did he even attempt to look at me and I knew what I had to do. If I wanted my friend and partner back, I was going to have to suck it up and apologize.
"Edward," I called softly.
"Hmm," he answered without looking up.
"Look, I'm sorry for being such a spaz earlier today, okay?" I said quickly.
He cocked his eyebrow at me skeptically, obviously not being a damn word that flew out of my mouth. It was pretty clear that I was going to have to grovel…
I sighed. "I'm sorry for how I acted this morning. I handled the situation very badly."
"Yeah, you did, Swan."
"Can you please stop calling me that, Edward? You win, okay, it bugs the shit out of me," I pleaded.
"Look, Bella, I just don't understand why you acted that way. I mean, it was almost like you were some jealous girlfriend," he stated pointedly.
"I know its nuts. I felt like a jealous girlfriend. It was so surreal and it felt like I was in this dream where I say stupid shit and can't control myself," I spoke candidly.
He shook his head as he gazed down, playing with his pen on his desk. "Just imagine how uncomfortable you made Jessica feel."
That statement angered me. Why in the hell should I give a shit about some girl I don't even know—a girl he barely even knows? It annoyed me how he put her feelings before mine. It was like he didn't even sympathize with how I feel or anything.
Back in that dream state, I knew I was going to regret the things that were about to come out of my mouth.
"Why would I? I don't even know the girl and I'm pretty sure she'll get over it," I paused looking at him as I cocked my head to the side. "Why do you care, Edward, huh? Is it because you only want to get into her pants?"
He narrowed his eyes at me and I knew right then and there that my apology was now void.
"I can't believe you would say that, Bella. You know what, that's it. How about we not talk for the rest of the day, okay? How does that sound?" he asked heatedly.
"That sounds easy enough, Cullen. I'm going home. When you see the DA tell them I said 'Hi'." I smiled tightly, snatching my jacket of the chair and slamming it forcefully against my desk. Not once did I turn back to see if he was looking as I headed out of the station.
However, I lied to him when I told him that I was going home. I had to make a little pit stop first.