Usagi skipped
happily down the street, a chocolate ice cream cone in one hand. It was a
beautiful sunny day and the sky was a brilliant clear azure blue. Usagi turned
her face up towards the warm sunlight, savoring the warmth. "What a
perfect day!" she sighed dreamily, almost forgetting about her
slightly-melted ice cream. She quickly gobbled up a drippy part. "Mmmmm,
nothing could ruin a day like this." She closed her eyes, basking in the
light. And obviously not watching where she was going.
It's no surprise that a minute later she ran straight into one Mamoru Chiba as
he was rounding a corner. Usagi shriekd in surprise as she collided with
Mamoru's broad chest. Mamoru, who had grown used to these quite literal run-ins
with the young girl, merely examined his favorite green jacket with a tired
sigh. "Nice going, Odango! It's not bad enough that you have a klutz
attack and crash into me every single day, now you have to ruin my
clothes." He picked a piece of smooshed ice cream cone off his jacket with
a grimace.
"Waaahhhhh, Mamoru you jerk!" Usagi wailed from the sidewalk where
she'd fallen. "What a waste of good ice cream!"
"Hey, it wasn't MY idea for you to-...LOOK OUT!"
With absolutely no warning, a youma had charged out of the bushes on the other
side of the street. Without slowing it's pace or giving any indications of its
motives, it barrelled across the street and headed straight for Usagi and the
ice-cream-covered Mamoru.
Several things happened very quickly. Having no time to think about the
consequences, Mamoru pulled out a rose to transform to Tuxedo Kamen. Usagi,
caught off guard by the youma's sudden appearance and charge, yelled,
"Moon Prism Power, MAKE-UP!" And the youma launched a dark energy
attack at them. There was a fantastic show of light and dark and color all
mixed into chaotic swirls, and when everything settled down again the youma was
sitting in the middle of the street looking confused. It blinked curiosly at
the two strange figures before it.
One of the figures stepped forward dramatically. "I am Sailor Moon, the
champion of justice! I will right wrongs and triumph over...WHAT THE
HELL?!" The words were Sailor Moon's. The fuku was Sailor Moon's. But the
voice most definitely belonged to Tuxedo Kamen. The youma could only watch in
astonishment as the mini-skirted man in front of it examined himself as best he
could, from shiny red boots to short black hair, let out a scream like a
banshee, and began hopping from foot to foot in a state of panic.
The other figure was sitting in the middle of the sidewalk, much as the youma
sat in the middle of the street, an expression of extreme confusion slowly
being replaced by one of total terror. "Oh no.." the masked girl
whispered. She tugged on her long blonde pigtails as if they were alien
monsters attacking her head. "Oh NO!"
{Author's Note: To clear up a part of this that might be confusing...even
though they've switched bodies, I will continue to call them based on their
physical appearance. Meaning, Mamoru wearing Sailor Moon's fuku is still
"Mamoru", even though it's Usagi inside. Otherwise, I run into some
strange gender issues. Anyone that's written/read Ranma fics (or any where
characters change gender) knows what I mean here. ^^;)
Startled to hear the voice speaking, the man spun around to stare at the girl.
Her eyes locked with his and instantly both realized what had happened.
Somehow, Usagi and Mamoru had switched bodies. And it had very obviously messed
up their transformations.
There was a long pause, broken by the youma deciding it was bored, climbing to
its feet, and roaring at the top of its lungs.
"AAHHHHHHHHH!" Mamoru roared back. Startled by both the youma's yell
and the deepness of his own voice, he fell over backwards.
Behind him, Usagi groaned. "You're a klutz even in MY body, Odango."
As if reminded, she tugged again at the long pigtails on her head.
Mamoru turned to glare at her. "You DON'T have to rip them out of your
head, Mamoru-baka! Er...my head...uhm.."
"Never mind!" Usagi shrieked in a high-pitched voice, climbing to her
feet. "We have to stop that youma!" She tried to pull Mamoru up,
grunting with the extra effort it took to lift his body weight.
"Don't grunt. It's unladylike," Mamoru instructed daintly. Then he
gasped and grabbed Usagi around the waist, diving to one side just in time to
dodge the charging youma. Usagi stared up at him in surprise from where she was
cradled against his chest. "How's THAT for klutzy?" Mamoru said
triumphantly.
Recovering, Usagi battered her eyelashes at Mamoru. "My hero," she
said dreamily, in a perfect imitation of the REAL Sailor Moon. She turned her
face up as if for a kiss.
"EWWWWW!!" Mamoru shrieked, pushing her away. "That's SOOO
GROOOS you jerk! You want me to kiss myself?! Or...you want to be kissed by
yourself?! Or...you want to kiss me...but wouldn't it be you want me to want to
be kissed by you, because I'm you and you're me...or-"
"STOP TRYING TO THINK, ODANGO!" Usagi yelled at him. "You're not
very good at it!" She massaged her temples.
"But hey, I'M not the Odango Atama anymore. That's YOU!" Mamoru
giggled and repeated in a taunting voice, "Odango Atama! Odango Atama!
Odango Ataaaamaaa! Eep!" The youma had recovered and charged them again,
and again the mini-skirted Mamoru had pulled Usagi to safety.
She pushed away from him, straightening her tuxedo smartly. "So attack it
already! Or are you going to spend all day looking like some kind of
cross-dresser playing dodgeball?!"
Mamoru had covered his ears. "Wow, am I REALLY that annoying?" he
mumbled. Seeing Usagi's glare, he backed away hastily. "Okay, okay! MOON
TIARA MAGIC!" As graceful as Sailor Moon, Mamoru launched the glowing disk
at the youma, a silly grin on his face as it dissolved. "Moondusted!"
he cheered, jabbing his hand in the air in a victory sign.
"Oh good lord," Usagi moaned, smacking her forehead and glancing
around furtively to make sure no one was around to watch 'him' acting like a
complete ditz. Luckily, the streets were empty so far. Grabbing Mamoru's hand,
she pulled him into the bushes.
Mamoru stumbled after her in surprise. "Hey, let go!" he whined.
Usagi whirled to face him.
"Not," she said with a quiet solemnity that was disconcerting to hear
in Usagi's voice, "until you switch us back."
Mamoru gaped. "How am *I* supposed to know that?! You think I WANTED to
get stuck as a total jerk! I never wanted to be a guuuuuuy!" Mamoru's
voice rose almost as high as Usagi's as his whine turned into a full-fledged
wail.
"Oh stop it! It's NOT helping anything!" Usagi snapped. Mamoru
stopped wailing and stared at her with watery eyes, sniffling occassionally.
"Something must have gone wrong when we BOTH transformed at the same time
and that youma attack hit in the middle."
"Maybe..we can just detransform?" Mamoru suggested in a trembly
voice.
Usagi blinked at him. "Don't be ridiculous, Odango!" She sighed.
"Well, I suppose ANYthing is better than seeing myself in that ridiculous
outfit though. It's worth a shot. Ready?" Mamoru nodded, wiping away his
tears.
"Okay, GO!"
There was a flash of light.
Usagi and Mamoru stared at each other. They grinned.
"YES! I'm back to normal, I'm back to normal!" Usagi giggled, dancing
in circles.
Mamoru ran his hands through his dark hair and smiled at the girl. "I take
it back Usagi," he said. "That wasn't such a bad idea after all.
Maybe you're NOT quite the ditz I thought."
Usagi paused. "That's the first time you've ever called me by my real
name!" she gasped, delighted.
Mamoru just shrugged. "Well, you're Sailor Moon. You save the world on a
regular basis. You've got to have SOMEthing in that pretty head of yours
besides meatballs."
Usagi blushed at the unexpected compliments to both her brains AND her beauty.
"Yes, I AM Sailor Moon." She stood on tiptoes and kissed Mamoru's
cheek shyly. "And you're Tuxedo Kamen."
"Yes...small world, isn't it?" he replied, pulling her into his arms.
