Catharsis

She sat silently beside the lake, her eyes dull and listless as she stared at the grey depths. She was past tears, sunken instead into the numb, emotionless state that comes with great sorrow. She had cried for days, for weeks, but eventually the seemingly endless flow of tears had ceased. The deep aching in her chest, however, had only increased with time. She missed him. She missed his arms around her, his breath on her neck, his tender lips on hers. She missed his ruffled hair, his wry smile, and his gleaming eyes. She missed everything he was, and everything he could have been. She missed him, the only person ever to love her completely.

It had been a year since the day her world had fallen apart. She had woken early on that morning so long ago, before the stars had faded from the sky. She was eager to see him again. They had planned to meet before everyone else had woken, to spend a few precious hours with each other before the stress of their lives resumed once more and they had to hide their feelings from the world. She had never expected that it would end in grief and tragedy.

She dressed quickly, and silently crept from her room and out into the corridors. Drifting like a wraith past moonlit windows, she made her way to the room they had agreed to meet in. Glancing around at the empty room in faint irritation, she wondered where he was. He was always there before her and he would never be late to a meeting with her. Sighing, she moved to the table in the corner of the room, and sat to wait for him. It was then that she saw the note.

I'm so sorry. I'll miss you, beautiful. I'm sorry it had to happen this way. Thank you for everything you've done for me, you mean more to me than anyone else ever has. I'll never forget you.

- H

She stared blankly at the note for several moments, before her eyes widened in dawning horror. She knew where he would be. There was only one place he would have gone. Rushing from the room, she sprinted down the corridors, all thought of caution swept from her mind by unadulterated terror. She raced onwards, going through endless corridors and up twisting staircases. In the distance she heard the muttering of the caretaker as he patrolled the corridors, but he was far behind and she would not stop. Eventually, she reached the final staircase and hurried upwards, dreading what she would find.

She opened the door at the top of the staircase and emerged onto the tower. He was standing there, on the parapets. He stared at her with his sad eyes, but even then he smiled his wry smile. He always smiled when she was around, regardless of the circumstances. She stepped towards him, her mouth opened to speak, but he shook his head. Smiling at her again, a sad smile, he leaned towards her. His lips found hers, and he kissed her tenderly for the last time. He leaned back and stared into her eyes.

"I love you, beautiful. I'm so sorry, I'll miss you forever."

He took a step back, and fell.

She had stared at the empty air in horror, before falling to the hard floor, alone again in a uncaring world. They had found his body in the morning, lying twisted upon the ground. His eyes no longer shone, but even in death he smiled. They found her hours later when she had failed to show up for her lessons. She had been curled up in a ball, half-frozen, her body still wracked with sobs.

They kept her in the infirmary for three days before releasing her. She had not spoken a word to anyone, merely crying ceaselessly. Everyone had avoided her afterwards, shooting her sympathetic looks whenever their eyes happened to meet hers, but never saying a word to her. They did not understand her pain. Their lives went on, lacking a friend, a familiar face, but she had lost her heart, her love, her life. A part of her had fallen with him, and had died. She would never be the same, without him by her side.

Eventually the flow of tears had ceased. She began to speak and smile again. People talked to her, teachers asked her questions, and people began to forget about the tragedy that had occurred. Nobody noticed the forced look of her smile, or the dullness in her once vibrant eyes. Nobody noticed the tiny, almost invisible flicker of agony when someone spoke his name. She pretended that all was well, and they believed her. But every evening, she came down to the lake. She sat alone on the stone they had shared so many times, and as she stared out at the lake she remembered him and all that she had lost. Even now, after a year, she loved him. She would never forget him, for as long as she lived.

And so, as the clouds parted over the lake and the first stars began to glimmer in the sky, she wept.