Waking up from the Neo world program sure was a rollercoaster for Komaeda. Realizing it was all a fabrication, that they were remnants of despair… that he cut off his own hand was a feat. The first person who had greeted him out of his slumber was Hinata, who looked a little differently from how he had remembered as well. His now multicolored eyes squeezed shut in a heartwarming sight at seeing the other finally awake, explaining him the entire situation with the greatest patience in the world. He was glad the other was able to find It in his heart to show him forgiveness, and even more. Acceptance.
Being granted the ability to watch the entire ordeal back from every angle by the future foundation, Hinata had concluded on the other's feelings fairly quickly, being more than happy to return said feelings to the other in due time. Komaeda being content on the fact that the brunet was able to stay in the same room as him without pulling his face up in disgust.
But months of friendship subdued into a slow relationship. He wasn't sure whether it was because of the confinement of the island, the worry of some of his classmates still being in a coma, or the despair that was still whispering in the back of their minds. When he had asked the brunet, he had said it was neither, changing the subject with a blush. Talking about his feelings wasn't his talent, and it probably was the only thing he had trouble with now that his mind was filled with fabricated hope.
Komaeda had accepted the broken boy, though, feeling more than happy to be broken together. His luck did indeed grant him one of the most precious gifts, someone's love.
Another make-out session had left them on the bed together, panting as their clothes were removed hastily, not having a care in the world anymore as long the other's lips were on his. They had decided that this was way more fun to do instead of watching the movie that was playing on the television, lovingly rolling through the sheets together in an embrace.
Their lovemaking always felt so special, so intimate. They weren't very frequent, being on a shared secluded place, after all, so they tried to relish in the feeling as much as they can. Practically melting in each other as Hinata moved his hips against him, feeling the excruciating heat of being filled by the other take over his body.
It was deliciously numbing, forgetting about where and what they were, only the other person dancing in their heads as they set a rhythm they both enjoyed. The brunet moaned under his breath as he whispered sweet nothing into his lover's ear, being answered with choked up mewls from Komaeda in return.
This is how it always went, slow and sweet. And he loved every second of it, wanting to drown in this moment and never resurface into reality. This was how it was supposed to be, the two of them, destined to spend their wicked future together.
A sharper than usual thrust made Komaeda yelp in pain, not recognizing the sudden force behind the other's movements.
"Auch, Hajime, what are you-"
He looked up at the boy above him, his usual dull red eye shining with a newfound glimmer, the yellow in the other looking weaker than usual, completely losing the spark that made Hinata. A shark 'tsk' left the brunet, muttering a 'how pathetic' with a click of the tongue.
"Kamukura…?"
It's not like he hadn't met the other's personality that was sleeping deep inside of him, the other half of him poking out every now and then, complaining about being bored at least a couple of times a week. But the exchanges were brief, and sometimes Komaeda wouldn't even be fully aware of the darkening of the other's voice, signaling in the arrival of Kamukura Izuru.
But this, this was the first time Kamukura took over the shared body during such a… intimate moment. He felt his face heating in embarrassment and fear as he stared into his multicolored eyes, his left red eye to be more precise. Usually, Hinata would take over after a couple of minutes, assuring him that the other was harmless, really, but the glow in his eyes shone with determination. A smirk formed on his lips, making Komaeda gulp at the unfamiliar sight. That was the first time he had seen that kind of expression on the other's face.
Blood drained from his face as a hand wrapped around his neck, his arms shooting up to claw at it desperately, his usual pale face becoming even whiter with dread. Trembling lips opened to communicate, when hips thrust upwards, rubbing against his prostate in the process. The voice of reasoning melted into a mewl of pleasure, head falling back into the pillow as his body started to shake. He did not expect that to happen.
"You know, we share each other's memories and feelings, but experiencing something while you're in control is vastly different than watching it through the consciousness of the other."
He lowered his voice, sounding as steady as ever as he whispered in his ear. "It's like the distinction between seeing something on a screen, and performing it yourself."
Komaeda's head was spinning, having trouble to understand the monotone voice of the other. Not knowing where the sudden explanation came from, on not really caring for it either at this point. Another thrust of the other's hips made him writhe in pleasure, eyes getting hazy with tears as he tried to maintain his gaze on the figure in front of him.
The smirk was gone again, lips drawn into a tight line as half lidded eyes looked down lazily, as if to analyze the man underneath him. The hand on his neck squeezed down with controlled pressure, hard enough to restrict the airway, but not enough to make him choke. Gray eyes widened as he whimpered at the contact, arms digging into the skin, the whirring sound of his prosthetic hand sounded weak, as if not having the strength to pry the other's arm off.
Kamukura just cooed at him in comfort, letting his free hand roam the other's naked torso. Fingertips glided from his pale side, over the bump of his ribcage to settle on one of the pink nubs sitting on his chest, pinching it teasingly.
A strained yelp left Komaeda's lips, trying desperately to push the other off. This felt bad, horrendous. As if he was cheating on the brunet… with the brunet. He wouldn't dare to break the other's trust, it being with the ultimate hope or not. He loved Hinata dearly.
Reasoning started to fade as Kamukura started to rock his hips, settling on a teasing pace as he played with the now hardened nipple. Even though the words of the other sounded unfamiliar, the touches on his body felt so recognizable, as if it was Hinata who was roaming his hands over his body.
Closing his eyes, he tried to pretend the penetrating gaze of the other's red eye, imagining that he was still making love with his boyfriend, not the male on top of him right now. It was hard, the hand squeezing on his neck with a harshness Hinata had never exhibited. A though settling in his mind unwelcomely. If they share each other's memories, does that mean Hinata was watching him now, too? He couldn't help but sob out an apology, hoping the other would understand.
"It's inequitable, don't you think? For him to have as much control as he has." He asked the question to no one in particular, continuing his agonizing pace.
"He's so boring, so utterly weak. Never acting on his impulses… his desires."
Komaeda gasped at the heat inside of him brushed past the bundle of nerves, missing it by a hair. The other was doing this on purpose, moving torturously slow inside of him. But he couldn't voice his complaints, mouth too occupied with spilling out begs and pleads.
"Don't you think it's animalistic to have such vulgar yearnings? Isn't self-control what separates us humans from beasts."
The other sobbed as an answer, trying to thrust his hips up desperately only to be stopped by the firm hand of Kamukura.
"Why would we have such carnal desires, anyway. Intercourse is only there to reproduce." The hand around his neck squeezed a little harder, the action almost seeming insulting.
"But it's not like two males are capable of fertilizing, now is it."
Throwing his head back with a moan, he couldn't help but shiver at the degrading words of the other. He wanted, no, needed contact, and the soft puffs of air brushing against his heated skin as the other spoke were almost enough.
"How does it feel to be so debilitated by lust?" He was met with a throaty gasp.
"Such a complicated mind as yourself becomes tainted with predictability under the right touch." Thrusting upwards to finally give the other what he wanted, Komaeda just nodded in agreement as he nearly screamed at the sensation. He had already lost the ability to piece together the words the other was saying, his head being complete mush by now. The buzzing in his ears not helping in the slightest in understanding Kamukura, but he stopped caring. Moaning for the other to keep moving, craving more.
"Please… hn, please- please."
The chants of begs left his lips uninterruptedly as he closed his eyes tightly. His voice growing waterier by the second, practically choking on his own spit, sputtering out more words in desperation as his face paled in the lack of oxygen.
"How disgraceful."
He felt wetness fall down over his cheeks, beyond the point of caring for tears. He was close, so close. He needed the release, all the muscles in his body contorting, making him shake vigorously. It felt like he was freefalling, preparing himself for the hit on the ground that never came, but what he was waiting for in anticipation. The lack of control of his body making him feel scared, vulnerable, and extremely aroused.
The slapping of skin sounded harder and harder. The bed creaking inside the cabin, as they quickened the pace. It felt so good, feeling a heat grow in his stomach, his cock twitching for the contact it never received. His prostate was being abused, the tip of the other's cock pushing against it with strength he didn't know the other possessed. Stars started to dance behind his eyes, unable to focus his vision anymore as screamed Hinata's name.
Kamakura slumped down, filling the other with his cum as he groaned. The pressure in his insides soon made Komaeda reach his end as well, opening his mouth in a silent moan as his entire body convulsed.
He climaxed, a wave of phenomenal release washing over him, only for him to crash down again in guilt. Hinata looked down with his mouth agape, registering the now sobbing boy under him. Chants of 'I'm sorry' and 'forgive me' leaving the trembling pale lips breathlessly.
Arms covered the shaking body under him protectively, snuggling into the crook of his neck as he hushed the other that it was 'okay'.
"I-I'm sorry Hinata. I… didn't mean to like it, but-" He was cut off by a kiss, warm and gentle, the total opposite of the act he had just experienced. A hand ran down his white locks, petting his head lovingly.
"It's okay, Komaeda." He fluttered kissed on the other's cheek. "It's not your fault." They locked eyes, gray meeting heterochromia. Hinata looked apologetic, a small smile dancing on his face, but he also looked, content? Did the brunet perhaps enjoy it? So many questions were dancing on his lips, but they were soon washed away by more kisses as they lay in each other's arms.
He just sighed as he returned the favor, grabbing the chestnut hair into his hands desperately, as if afraid the other would disappear if he let go. He felt the bump of his scar under his finger, stroking it gently, his left hand clicked lowly at the movement, the mechanic sounds started to grow familiar to him already as Hinata took said hand and kissed the metal finger lovingly.
They were broken together, the two of them, no… the three of them. Komaeda kissed the brunet's forehead, just above his left eye, whispering against the skin on his head.
"I love you."