A/N: I don't know how to write a western accent, and I don't feel like looking it up, so Nephenee doesn't have an accent in the writing.
Geoffrey didn't understand why everyone seemed to think he and Elincia would make a good couple. Sure, he loves her, but only as a friend and a sister of sorts. Just thinking about marrying her makes him feel uneasy; he figured she deserves someone better than him.
Especially since he had already fallen in love...with a certain country girl.
--
Nephenee was eating her lunch under the shade of an elm tree when Mia ran up to her. "Hey, Nephenee," she said, "you won't believe what me and the girls just found out!"
"...What's up?" the green-haired country girl asked.
"I think Sir Geoffrey might have a crush on you!" Mia exclaimed with a fangirl squeal.
Nephenee's face turned bright red and she dropped her sandwich out of shock. Standing up, she cried, "I...I don't understand! I'm not even interested in Sir Geoffrey! I already told you...I'm gay! Heather is my girlfriend!"
Mia waved it off. "Oh, please, Nephenee! That's just a phase you're going through! You know that in the end, you're going to get married and have six kids and a dog and you'll never got a moment's rest afterwards for the rest of your life! Doesn't that sound better?"
"...Not really." Nephenee replied timidly.
"TOO BAD!" Mia snapped, "WE'RE GONNA GET YOU HOOKED UP WITH SIR GEOFFREY AND YOU'RE GONNA LIKE IT!"
Nephenee cursed under her breath. 'You've got to be shitting me...'
Mia grabbed the poor girl by the hand and dragged her all the way back to the campsite where everyone else was. Geoffrey was busy telling Tormod and Edward about the birds and the bees when the blue-haired swordsmaster interrupted him.
"Hey, Geoffrey! I think you got something important you need to tell Nephenee here!" She said, pushing Nephenee up in front. Geoffrey stared deeply into Nephenee's eyes, and his breathing began to grow heavy. His cheeks were even flushed, for crying out loud. Nephenee closed her eyes and prepared to hear the dreaded confession of his love for her...
"Umm...I have nothing important to tell her." Geoffrey said with a shrug.
Nephenee and Mia both stared at Geoffrey like he was on drugs or something.
"Wait...I thought you were in love with Nephenee!" Mia asked.
Geoffrey had no idea what they were talking about. "Isn't Nephenee gay?" he replied.
Nephenee was really getting sick of all of this; turning to Mia, she snapped, "SEE? I TOLD YOU! NOW IF YOU TWO WILL EXCUSE ME, I'M GOING TO GO AND PLEASURE MY GIRLFRIEND HEATHER!" And with that, she stormed off.
Mia walked up to Geoffrey and exclaimed, "I...I...I don't understand! I thought...you said you were in love with a 'certain' country girl! Ilyana, Micaiah, Laura and me overheard you talking about it with Bastian!"
Geoffrey realized why Mia was confused, and he couldn't help but laugh. Looking about, he said, "It's alright, Mia. I AM in love with a certain country girl...but it's not Nephenee..." Then, looking over the girl's shoulder, a smile formed on his lips.
Turning around, Mia realized who he was looking at...it was Meg, Brom's second daughter and a country girl like Nephenee. She was busy pigging out on some fried chicken.
"Isn't she lovely?" Geoffrey asked dreamily, "My life would be complete if I could just squeeze those love handles of hers for just a minute!"
"...She's not THAT fat." Mia muttered in response.
Geoffrey snickered, saying, "Oh really? Well, I'll just need to change that, won't I?"
Still a bit disturbed at the fact that Meg was Geoffrey's love interest, Mia then said, "H-Hold on...isn't Zihark supposed to get married to Meg?"
"So? He doesn't want to get married to that beautiful angel...and I say that he is a fool for running away. Anyway, his loss is my gain...or better yet, her gain...heh heh..." Geoffrey continued to chuckle at his pitiful little joke.
Mia cringed and ran off, leaving Geoffrey to fantasize more of his bizarre sexual fetishes that involve fat people and whips...