Voices in the dark
(Still in the dark!)
Beep
Beep
Beep.
I've heard people say that when they die for a moment they see a flash of light ahead.
I didn't see any flash of light.
I heard voices.
I heard the people I loved calling me.
All of them; calling me from both sides of the great divide.
I could hear my dad calling me.
He wasn't calling me to join him. He was telling me that it wasn't time yet.
I could hear my mom calling me. She sounded so scared.
Like the day I ran and hid in the alley because I thought I saw them come back for me.
She was scared of losing me.
I could hear my bubba Starsky calling me for honey cake and milk.
She was calling me to join her in the land of milk and honey.
"But only if you are a good boy Davey. Are you a good boy? Did you obey your momma?"
So I didn't go to her this time.
I could hear Terri calling me.
"I love you David. But Hutch loves you too."
I could hear Hutch.
He wasn't calling.
Hutch was crying.
Hutch was praying.
"Our Father that art in heaven…."
Hutch was begging his god.
"Please Lord don't take him from us yet."
Hutch was railing against his god.
"What kind of god is letting this happen to him?"
I heard Dobey in the dark; trying to reason with Hutch.
"You can't stop it happening Hutch."
"Get out there and find them."
I heard Huggy…what he said is unrepeatable!
But I knew he would go and help Hutch if he could.
I could hear the doctors.
I could hear the nurses.
And I could hear another voice.
A familiar voice.
"Keep fighting David. Don't let it happen to you like this."
I knew that voice so well.
It was my voice.
It was my guardian angel's voice; calling me from inside my soul.
It was my voice echoing in my mind and spirit.
I called to myself to live.
And I listened.
Beep
Beep
Beep.
It is the voice of the machine telling me that I am still here.
I hear Hutch again.
He's excited about something.
I must make the effort to listen.
If I try hard enough maybe I'll be able to tell him I'm here.
Beep
Beep
Beep