AN: Welcome to my newest fanfiction 'Tattered Dreams'. This is the first thing I've written for Undertale as I have just recently discovered/fallen in love with the game. Sans is my favorite character and as such I just have to torment him. I actually feel that Sans is a rather tragic character. During the genocide runs he is constantly forced to watch as both his family and friends are killed. Yet still he finds the strength to challenge the fallen child and, even though he is technically the weakest enemy in the game, he still kicks major butt! In this story Sans will retain his memories of the various timelines and suffer from the results of going through everything that he has. I don't believe that he would be able to go through all that without developing some form of anxiety or PTSD. There will be some blood in this story, because I feel like making skeletons able to bleed (they're monsters they don't have the same rules as a human skeleton... at least that's my excuse) as well as some other violence that goes along with it... nothing too bad (probably). Also I write Frisk/Chara as a girl. Well I guess I've rambled enough. Hope you enjoy :) Please let me know what you think!
DISCLAIMER: No matter how badly I wish it were true, I will never own Undertale. That honor belongs to Toby Fox.
Red eyes stared at him from the shadows as a knife blade glinted. This was nothing new to the short skeleton waiting in the hall of judgment... after all... he's lived this same event countless times before. The fallen child began their approach as Sans took his normal stance, his left eye already beginning to glow a bright blue.
"Why are you still trying to stop me?" The young girl asked with a mocking grin. "You'll just die in the end... you always do."
Turning narrowed eyes on his opponent, Sans replied resolutely. "That may be true, but... I've still gotta try."
The childs expression darkened with anger as she raced forward, only to be dodged by the cunning monster before her.
"Why can't you just GIVE UP!?" She screamed, the grim replaced with a vicious snarl.
"Until I save my friends, each and every one of them..." He hissed, voice cold as he sent rows of bones her way. "I will never give up!"
The fight continued as it usually did after that. Sans would use his magic, controlling bones and gaster blasters with ease while continuing to evade the kids attacks. With each death Chara was dealt, however, the skeleton new she was learning his patterns. He was already beginning to tire from the constant strain of using his magic. Taking a moment to wipe the sweat off his forehead after the latest kill, he laughed quietly... thinking back to the times he had trained with his brother. He had always been the weaker of the two, ever since they were baby bones, and it caused Papyrus to constantly worry about him. It didn't help matters that he only had one HP when he battled. This was attributed to an event that had occurred when he was a less than a year old, something he couldn't remember. That's why Papyrus was so protective and why he himself worked so hard to get his older brother to smile. With the way his bro acted, many assumed that he was actually the younger of the duo. A fact which Sans didn't bother to correct, wanting to preserve the innocence that Paps possessed. His train of thought was interrupted as a knife careened towards his skull. Barely managing to get out of the way in time, he narrowly avoided the second strike headed for his chest.
"Getting a little impatient there, aren't ya kid?" Sans questioned as he grabbed the girls wrist, preventing the knife from meeting it's mark.
"Or maybe you're just getting reckless." She stated, a victorious look in her eyes as her unrestrained hand flew forward with a second blade, slicing deeply into his side.
Sans' eye sockets widened in shock as he collapsed to his knees.
'What the heck?' He thought as vengeful laughter echoed through the room. 'Where did she get another knife?'
Sweat beaded on his face as Sans shot up in bed, a skeletal hand grasping for his wounded side before realizing that it had all been a nightmare. He quickly thought back on all that had happened in the last few months, trying to keep his breathing under control so he wouldn't hyperventilate.
After saving everyone and escaping the fallen childs hold, Frisk had been planning on breaking the barrier for her friends but after hearing about what the humans were like on the surface the monsters came to the unanimous decision to leave it untouched. They would rather live peacefully underground than face more humans like Chara. Frisk, who didn't have any family of her own, was adopted by Toriel and Asgore. Sure they were still separated but had decided to talk things through... especially since they had two children to care for. Asriel had somehow managed to regain his original form after Chara was banished. No one knew how exactly and no one wanted to disrupt the happy reunion to figure it out. Sans had still kept a close eye on the child for over a month though, wary that the kind and gentle attitude he now processed was just a mask to hide the monster he'd once been. Undyne and Alphys had started dating and loved spending nights at each others houses watching anime. Even though he realized that he didn't actually want to be in the royal guards, Papyrus still insisted on training with Undyne. In his extra time, he took to helping Toriel with the school she had opened... he was a big hit with the kids due to his caring and childish nature. And what of himself? Well... he got by, even if he was still plagued by memories of the failed timelines.
'It was just a dream! Just... a dream...' He told himself as he finally began to calm down. Remembering everything up till this point had really helped ground him. 'Frisk managed to free herself from Chara's influence by saving Asriel, remember? That little brat is never coming back. You don't need to live through any more genocide loops. She's gone... It's over.''
But if that was true, why did he still feel the searing pain from the knife? Glancing down, the young monster bit back a startled yelp. Blood was seeping through the t-shirt he'd worn to bed the night before, forming a quickly growing stain on the white fabric. With shaking hands he lifted his shirt, staring in fear at the gash beneath.
'Wha... h...how can this...?' His thoughts were a jumbled mess as he tried to comprehend the meaning of what he saw.
There, sitting in the very same spot as in his dream, was the cut he had received from Chara's knife.
Quickly putting pressure on the wound, Sans made his way over to his dresser where he pulled out a roll of bandages and some antiseptic ointment from the first aid kit he always kept there. After taking care of the cut he put on a new shirt and his blue hoodie before heading towards the bathroom, hoping to get his original shirt cleaned before Papyrus woke up. Fate, however, wasn't on his side it seemed for as soon as he opened the door the younger skeleton heard his brothers footsteps heading his way. Thinking fast, Sans threw the evidence of his injury into his room and locked the door, wincing slightly as the movement jarred his aching side.
"GOOD MORNING BROTHER! DID YOU..." The elder called before trailing off.
The shorter monster plastered his usual grin onto his face, trying his best to seem convincing though he knew his brother had noticed his earlier expression.
"Is there something the matter?" Papyrus asked, concern written on his face. "You seem more pale than normal and since we are skeletons that is very worrisome."
"I guess I'm just bone-tired." He replied, hoping to relieve his bros worry.
"WELL IF YOU'RE FEELING WELL ENOUGH TO MAKE PUNS, no matter how bad of a pun it was, THEN I SUPPOSE IT'S FINE." The taller stated, looking slightly exasperated. "Just don't overexert yourself today Sans. I can't believe I'm doing this but... I'm actually giving you permission to slack off."
"Who are you and what have you done with my brother?" Sans asked, a genuine smile spreading across his face even as his side throbbed.
"Yes yes... very funny." Pap declared before whipping around to head downstairs. "NOW I'VE GOT TO GO TRAIN WITH UNDYNE SO YOU'D BETTER TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF WHILE I'M GONE!"
With a final look at his little brother the excitable monster was off, closing the door loudly behind him. Sans sighed in relief as he leaned against the wall. He had never been good at hiding things from Papyrus but after living through so many timelines... well, let's just say it had gotten a lot easier. He was the only one who remembered them after all. For some reason even Frisk and Asriel had lost all memory of any timeline other than the one they were currently living. The short skeleton couldn't help feeling slightly envious of his friends. How was it that he was forced to remember all the horrid details while everyone else was blessed with no memory of the events that had transpired. Sure he had thought of telling them... but he could never bring himself to. How could he ruin what they'd all built together. So what if he had nightmares nearly every night or if his magic flared up every once in a while. So what if there were days he had to turn away from Frisk because all he could see when he looked at her was the distorted image of Chara. There have been days when all Sans wanted was to lock himself in his room and cry over how many times he'd failed to save Papyrus... failed to save them all. But he didn't... he put on the best smile he could manage, made terrible puns, and kept telling himself that this was for the best. That he could be happy as long as his friends were. Yet he could tell that the mask he had so carefully constructed was beginning to crack. The smiles were more forced, the puns harder to tell...
Shaking himself from that line of thought, the hoodie clad monster pushed himself to his feet. He hadn't even noticed that he'd been sitting there, knees pulled up to his chest and his arms wrapped around himself while he trembled like some scared little kid. He felt ashamed... usually he was more in control than this.
'I'm such an idiot! What if someone had come in?' He panicked slightly, glancing around to make sure he was still alone. 'All I want if for everyone to be happy. In order for that to happen I need to make sure they never find out about the anomalies.'
The promise he had made to himself to protect his friends and family filled him with determination. He would not let them suffer the same pain he's had to deal with! Managing to make it back into his room, he decided just to burn the shirt using his magic... most of the blood was dried now anyway. He took a while to regain his composure before daring to venture out. He had promised Frisk and Asriel that he would come over to play with them today. So, without further pause, he headed towards a shortcut that would leave him right outside the ruins.
Once at the doorway he knocked, taking a deep breath while waiting for the door to swing open. By the time it did, the lazybones had made sure his smile was in place. The two children immediately raced forward... wrapping their small arms around him in an excited hug.
"Well, looks like you guys missed me, huh?" Sans laughed, swinging them around in a circle with the help of his magic.
The duo laughed as he carefully placed them back on the ground.
"Yes, we did." Frisk admitted fondly, before asking. "Why did it take so long for you to come visit this time?"
"I had a lot of important things to do." He said by way of excuse.
"Like what?" Asriel teased good-naturedly. "Trying to come up with even worse puns?"
"Good one kid." He replied, ruffling the boys fur.
Turning towards Toriel, the goat mother offered a kind smile before they all headed inside. There was an aroma of cinnamon and butterscotch in the air, signaling that the former queen was in the process of making one of her famous pies. As they entered the kitchen the kids took off, most likely getting a head start on whatever game they had decided to play with their adopted uncle. He smiled after them... this one not as forced as his previous.
"Sans?" Toriel questioned, gently placing her paw on his shoulder.
He jerked slightly, startled by the sudden contact. Tori gave him a concerned look but he just shrugged it off.
"What did ya need?" He replied, realizing that she had probably been speaking to him.
"I asked if you would like some tea?" She declared, watching him intently for any sign that something was wrong.
Sans knew that he had to find a way to bring her focus off of him before he said or did something that would give away his deception.
"No thanks..." He smirked mischievously. "You know that stuff just goes right through me."
The taller monster let her features relax as she laughed. Sans knew it was the most obvious pun he could have made but he just didn't think he could come up with anything better... not after how his day has been going so far. Soon Asriel and Frisk returned to drag him off into a game of hide and seek. Even though he could have easily won with the use of his shortcuts... he never did. He didn't want to teach the kids any bad habits like cheating, so whenever he played with them it was always by the rules. Throughout the day Sans saw each of his friends giving him concerned glances when they thought he wasn't looking. He knew that he'd been far quieter then usual and had been zoning out quite a bit.
'Guess I'll just have to try harder to hide it.' He thought as he kept an eye on the children. 'They wouldn't understand anyway and the truth would just cause everyone unnecessary pain. Best to keep it to myself.'
By the time he left it was beginning to get late. Toriel had offered to let him spend the night and the kids had all but begged him to stay, but the skeleton knew it was an offer he had to refuse. What if he had one of his nightmares and his magic went out of control. He could end up seriously hurting one of his friends, and in his mind... that was the worst thing that could ever happen.
"Do you really have to leave?" Asriel petitioned, holding onto one of the skeletons bony hands while Frisk grabbed the other.
"Yea Sans... why?" She agreed with her adopted brother. "Please stay... I want to spend more time with you. It's been so long since you've come to visit... I was starting to think you didn't like me anymore."
Sans' face took on a stunned expression as he knelt down, pulling them into a comforting embrace.
"There is nothing that would stop me from liking you Frisk..." He said honestly. "The same goes for you Asriel. I know... how bout I come by in a few days? Would that make you feel better?"
"Yeah!" They both shouted excitedly, already forgetting their previous unhappiness.
"Then I'll make sure to be pun-ctual" Frisk, Tori and Sans laughed as Asriel moaned.
"Are you sure you'll be okay heading back into town on your own?" Toriel demanded worriedly, drawing the skeleton into a hug of her own. "I know you're use to taking care of yourself but still..."
"Don't ya worry." He reasoned, sending her a calming look as he pulled away. "It's not that long of a walk back to Snowdin and Papyrus would be disappointed if I wasn't there to read him a bedtime story."
'Besides... it'll give me some time to think.' He added silently.
"Well, if you're sure." The goat monster relented before handing him something. "But take this. It can be a pretty cold walk and I know that your hoodie is pretty worn, so..."
Sans stared in awe at the present. It was a handmade hoodie, similar to one he wore now but a dark midnight blue. White faux fur lined the hood and there was extra insulation inside making it feel amazingly soft to the touch. It also had pockets he could tuck his hands into. But the best part was on the front, right above where his soul resided. There was a circle of tiny embroidered hearts... one for each of his best friends either in their favorite color or the color of their magic. In the center of the circle stood a larger heart. This one was a brilliant blue... the color of his own magic. He had no clue how Toriel had done it... but it appeared as if the hearts were glowing with an inner light. He could tell that a lot of care had been put into it's making and that it must have taken an exceptionally long time to finish. For a few moments he hugged it close before letting out a small sigh, making to hand it back.
"Sorry Tori, but... I've done nothing to deserve this." He said, turning his face away from the others.
He was surprised when he felt a large paw take his hand and wrap it firmly around the fabric. He risked a glance up, her decisive yet kind eyes meeting his.
"Don't be ridiculous." She chided mildly. "You have done so much for me Sans. Don't you remember... you looked after Frisk for me the whole time I couldn't be there. You protected her, offered advice, and gave her something she desperately needed... a friend. If that's not worth a kind gesture then I don't know what is."
Tears began pooling in his eye sockets but he refused to let them fall as he replaced his old hoodie with the new one Tori had so thoughtfully made for him. He had done those things... but he remembered that there had also been times when he'd failed to do so. Times where he'd been forced to kill the child over and over while she was possessed by Chara's vengeful soul. Sans forced back the memories, focusing instead on the fact that everyone he cared for was still alive... including Frisk. He had helped her this time and that was all that mattered. No matter how many times he'd failed, no matter how many times they'd met as enemies, in this timeline... they were friends.
"Thanks... it means a lot to me." He said, voice barely more than a whisper before continuing under his breath. "More than you'll ever know."
Without further ado, Sans turned and walked through the entry of the ruins... swiftly making his way down the path towards Snowdin. When he got home he was thoroughly exhausted. Having decided not to use any shortcuts he had taken the time to reflect on his earlier nightmare and all the implications that came with it. Somehow Chara had managed to invade his dreams... that much was for certain. But what was her plan and how did the wound she inflicted on him in the dream transfer into the waking world? As he lay in bed that night, the skeleton would be lying if he said he didn't feel slightly afraid at the prospect of going to sleep.
AN: So that was the first chapter! I hope you enjoyed it. This story will have a lot of hurt/comfort, feels, and fluff... as that is my specialty for writing. I'd love to hear what you have to say about this story so if you could leave a review it would be awesome ;)