Selfless by asesina
disclaimer: I don't own TVD!
Enjoy!
It hits him when they're driving in the sky blue Camaro and making aimless small talk as the mile markers whiz past them.
He's doing this for both of them.
Damon is on this mission because he loves Elena, but he's also there for Stefan.
After all, he's Stefan's big brother and no one can kill Stefan but him.
Damon wonders when he became so forgiving, so willing to help. It's a bit unnerving, but he welcomes the change as they follow the curves of the road and head closer and closer to the distant border of North Carolina, where Elena is being held captive.
Damon wants to make small talk, but he's been enemies with Stefan for years, and it's a bit difficult to chat about the weather or the Washington Redskins with their complex history.
He sighs frustratedly and takes a small sip of blood to assuage his fears a bit.
When they arrive at the mansion where Elena is being held, Damon jumps out first, resisting the temptation to race into the house and kill the bastard who's holding Elena hostage.
He also eyes Stefan protectively, casually mentioning the fact that the vampires might be too old or too powerful for his little brother to handle.
Inside, his racing thoughts betray his calm facade, and Damon silently begs with his brother.
Don't go in there, Stef. They'll kill you.
Stefan ignores his concern and tells him that it's because of love and Elena that he's doing this.
Damon wants to say that he feels the same way, but he can't let Stefan know more than he already lets on.
He knows that Stefan is suspicious of his feelings for Elena, so he shrugs and follows his brother in to their certain demise.
Inside, Damon throws all of his strength and energy into the battle with Elijah. He is a little less mindful of his own safety as he ensures that Elena is safe.
He watches her from the corner of his eye.
Damon rushes to Stefan's aid as well, and he grins despite himself when he's finally able to stake Elijah on the makeshift coat-rack spear.
When the battle is over, Damon does his best to conceal his disappointment when Elena runs to Stefan and hugs him tightly.
They lock eyes for an instant and until Elena finally turns her eyes away from Damon's piercing gaze.
Damon doesn't know what frustrates him more, the fact that his little brother knows about his feelings for Elena, or the fact that he actually helped Stefan for reasons other than impressing Elena.
Damn it, he was going soft!
Damon knows that Elena and Stefan are making him empathetic and human, and it is unsettling to say the least. He never dreamed that there would be a day when he'd actually let a girl go just so Stefan could be happy with her.
Damon is also rendered speechless when Stefan admits that he would be lonely without him, and actually apologizes for turning him all those years ago!
He's certainly uncomfortable with the warring emotions that threaten to tear him apart. His love for Elena is an all-consuming flame, but it is tempered by the gentle rains of compassion and empathy.
He understands that Stefan loved her first, and a small, surprisingly human part of his heart tells him to let go.
This isn't just for Elena. It's for Stefan, too.
Damon's standing in Elena's room now, and she is ripe for the taking.
He longs to envelop her with a protective embrace. He is capable of restraining her in a matter of seconds, but he crushes his desires and slowly steps toward her.
Elena reads his intentions and gently reminds him that he shouldn't act like that, or talk in that low, husky voice, or lean in so close as he presses his lips to her forehead.
Instead, she is silent as he wipes her thoughts and leaves her alone with an empty room and a curtain dancing wildly in the wind.
Elena knows that she just heard something that she wasn't supposed to, but she can't quite remember what it is.
Just outside her window, Damon stands on a tree branch and smiles ruefully as Elena climbs into bed.
"Good night, Elena," he whispers into the night.
He longs to step through the window and take Elena for himself, but Damon must learn to overcome his desires.
He reminds himself once more that Stefan loves Elena, and he vows to give them the happiness that he will never know.
He's doing this for Elena, and, although it's harder to admit, he's doing this for Stefan, too.
After all, living vicariously is better than not living at all.
Damon wipes away a tear that managed to find its way onto his cheek as he walks away from Elena's house and disappears into the shadowed trees beneath her window.
For the first time, Damon doesn't mind being selfless.
End.