Author's Note: I never write character deaths. NEVER. So this was absolutely heartbreaking for me to write. You can blame the song Heart Of Courage by Two Steps From Hell ... :'(
...point of fact: if you listen to this song while reading this, you will probably cry. (so, please do) ;)
Please read and review! And check out my work-in-progress: Far From Home! xD
"We all live in a house on fire, no fire department to call; no way out." ~Tennessee Williams
I didn't mean for it to happen.
Hell, no one did.
And that's why it happened.
We were powerless to stop it.
Oh, but the guilt.
I could've done something to help her.
Right?
...
No.
In one moment, the world went dark.
Pitch-black.
Just like that, she was gone.
Cold, lifeless—dead.
I tried to stop it.
I really did.
I saw it coming.
But I moved…
Too slow.
I wasn't there for her when she needed me most.
When she needed us all.
…
I believe it now.
That monsters truly exist.
That evil has a place in this harsh, unforgiving world.
It's true.
I still don't know why.
I don't think I'll ever know why…
All I know is I believe it.
I've seen it.
…
It took me a long time to believe the truth of it all.
But after so many times, the perceived notion starts to sink in.
…
It all starts with a monster.
That mad grin, the shaking hands gripping the trigger, pulling fast—*BOOM*
The bastard's head snaps back with my bullet in his head.
Yes.
And just like that, the monster is dead.
I did it.
We did it.
Still alive, still alive.
…
But that's when I hear it.
The quiet scream—for somebody.
Anybody?
The choking.
The tears.
The gurgling sound the blood makes as it pours from her chest.
…
Here's something you don't know:
The human body can be drained of blood in 8.6 seconds given adequate vacuuming systems.
But of course, I had to bring up that fact.
Here...
Now.
"S-S-Spence..?"
No.
Not this girl.
Not this day.
No way in hell.
...
I see her there.
Beneath me.
Lying on the ground.
Pale, trembling with cold and anguish.
Clutching my sweaty hand with her own.
Struggling to breathe.
Coughing droplets of blood; splattering my face.
I don't mind.
I care about one thing.
We all do.
All of us, holding her tight, protecting her with our warm bodies.
But it's all too late; don't you see?
…
God, please…save her.
She can't—she's dying…
I can't let her—
Please..?
…
But God isn't watching.
God doesn't care.
She's dying, and God does not care.
Because it's too late…
…
This is when it finally hits me.
This is when I know for sure.
Evil exists.
Evil is here.
Evil is taking her away.
From me.
From the world.
…
No…
…
She looks at each of us, one by one.
And I just sit there, watching her.
The ambulance is coming—we all know this.
But it'll come too late.
…
Never have I felt so alone.
Never have I felt so helpless, so lost.
All I wanted to do was keep her safe.
Now, all I want to do is make it better.
I want to not let them take her away.
She needs to stay here.
With her family.
With her son.
With the people she loves.
With those who love her in return.
She reached out and touched my face, ever so gently.
"H—Henry—"
"I know—"
"Yale."
"What?"
"Y—you promised—remember?"
She tried to smile, but it was more of a pained grimace.
I grabbed her hand, understanding.
Remembering.
Almost smiling back.
"He will."
She nodded, relieved, I guess.
A tear rolled down my cheek.
This was it.
The warmth was slowly draining from her body—I could feel it happening.
And I can't do anything to stop it.
…
NO.
...
She touched everyone one last time…
…and looked up at the night sky, so clear tonight.
She took a deep breath and closed her eyes.
"The pain is gone…" She whispered, a serene look crossing her pallid face.
"I—I'm glad…"
I couldn't think of anything else to say.
…
We just sat there, holding her.
As the warmth left her body.
Shuddered out of her.
Leaving behind an empty shell.
…
She's gone.
…
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
Tears streaming down, sobs wracking my body.
Why does it hurt so much?
Stop; stop HURTING.
Make it STOP.
Oh, God, please.
That silent bastard.
…
SHE'S DEAD.
She's dead, and I let it happen.
I let it happen.
...
Four pairs of hands grab my own.
Morgan, Hotch, Rossi, Emily.
Holding on to my hands for dear life.
'Cause we all need to feel.
Something…anything.
Anything but this goddamn pain.
…
Now you know.
Now you see the truth.
Monsters exist.
Evil exists.
And we're powerless to stop it.
…
I don't have faith anymore.
In anything.
I lost my best friend, the kindest person I know—knew.
A mother.
A sister.
One hell of a woman.
…
Jennifer Jareau is dead.
…
And now you know why.
Why I believe what I believe.
You see it.
…
Believe it.