The Final Adventure of Sonic The Hedgehog™
A fan-fiction by PJ THE DJ HERO 77777777777
© 2013 PJ THE DJ HERO 77777777777
© 1991-2013 SEGA™ all rights reserved; Sonic The Hedgehog™ and all other Sonic characters belong to SEGA™. All other copyrighted or trademarked materials used in this story belong in their respective owners This story is property of PJ THE DJ HERO 77777777777, any resemblance to anyone or thing, living or dead depicted except for characters from SEGA™'s "Sonic The Hedgehog™" is completely coincidental or satirical.
Chapter 1
Sonic and the toilet
One day Sonic The Hedgehog™ was walking to 7-11™, he was not really sure as to what he wanted, but he wanted to go to 7-11™. When Sonic walked into 7-11™ the aroma of fresh goods majestically flew into his nose. Not to mention the better prices than the nearby Wawa™ which is always full of gangs, poisoned and or expired food, among other things. So Sonic went to the corner of the 7-11™ and bought a blue-berry-super Slurpee™ for only *$1.99! He then paid the man at the register and let him keep the change, because Sonic is nice, unlike you, the reader. He then dashed out of the store with his new SOAP™ shoes, the radical official shoe brand of Sonic The Hedgehog™! He drank the Slurpee™ super fast because he is Sonic the Hedgehog™. "I gotta Super Sonic pee!" Sonic exclaimed. He then rushed home with his SOAP™ shoes. However, when Sonic walked into his house he noticed something odd, HIS TOILET WAS GONE! So Sonic used Bing™, which has 90% more relevant search results for the world's leading searches, to look up a toilet to by which, unlike on Google™ we Bing™ does not let merchants PAY their way to the top of shopping results, so you KNOW you are getting the best deal around! So Sonic a toilet for dirt cheap thanks to the help of Bing™, and rushed to go pick it up. He ran fast to the local Home Depot™, for people who like to get things done. But they said they were out of stock so Sonic left with a very sad face.
Sonic Sez™: I think I may need a toilet.
Sonic then ran outside as fast as he could, he found a portable toilet outside of the Home Depot™, but Tails was in it. So Sonic figured the only thing left to do, even though this was the meanest thing he would ever do, he had to tip over the toilet. He did, no sweat, Sonic kept thinking. He opened up the door only to find Tails's head in the toilet, he pulled it out, his face was horribly disfigured, covered in blood. "Oh shit, I gotta hide this here body before anyone sees it!" Sonic managed to squeak those words out of his mouth as he cried a river as Knuckles was dialing the police, but no, Sonic wouldn't have it. He then grabbed Knuckles's phone, and chucked it with all of his might. Sonic then grabbed Knuckles's by his neck and shoved his head in the toilet with Knuckles fighting back.
Knuckles's head was still in the toilet after 10 whole minutes, and Sonic, was pretty sure, he was dead. Sonic then walked home while crying the most he'd ever had. "What if there were other victims? , if so, who did?, was Sonic going to jail?, was Sonic going to lose his job and wife, Amy Rose™? Thoughts were racing through his head faster than he could run. But everything was over, and there was nothing he could do, Sonic was now a ruthless killer… He sat down on a park bench when a stray dog ran up to him, he kicked it and it went flying across the park. "Great, now I'm a murderer, dog-kicker, and I also walked the wrong way at a one way crosswalk!" Sonic whined to himself. He then felt a sharp claw scratch him, it was Knuckles, striving for revenge. Sonic spin dashed home when it started raining. He arrived home late, with his hair sticking up like a Chia-Pet™ with red stains covering his once blue fur…