So, this is kind of my challenge to myself. I'm writing one fanfiction for each episode of Merlin. Some are one-shots, some are longer stories. I ran out of ideas for fanfictions so this is how I'm dealing with that. If anyone has any prompts for me, feel free to leave it in a review and if I write it after I finish writing these 65 stories, I'll dedicate it to you… so, thanks. And I give you Season 1 Episode 2.
Summary: This takes place right after Arthur has fired Merlin. What if Merlin doesn't leave when Arthur orders him to? Will he find a way to get through to Arthur? One-shot.
Story 2: His Own Person
"You can trust me!" Merlin told Arthur sincerely. He couldn't believe that he had been sacked.
"And look where it got me this time. Get out of my sight!" Arthur yelled to Merlin.
Merlin glared at him. He wasn't going to let Arthur risk his life just because Valiant had outsmarted them. Merlin knew what he saw. "Arthur," Merlin said slowly. He didn't want to anger Arthur further, but if that's what it would take to get through to Arthur then so be it. Merlin would rather face the fury then fail in his destiny. "I know you're angry. But this wasn't my fault. I was telling the truth!"
"How am I to believe that? My father is right. The word of a servant means nothing," Arthur said harshly. Merlin winced. Part of him knew that Arthur hadn't meant his words, but they still hurt.
"You are not your father! Stop trying to be!" Merlin yelled, angrier than he had ever been with Arthur. This really wasn't entirely surprising as he had only known Arthur a handful of days. But still, it took a lot to get Merlin this angry. Merlin didn't know what it was about Arthur that was so infuriating, but for some reason Merlin's anger always sparked when it came to him. Merlin often prided himself on his ability to control his anger. There were very few lapses in his composure. Somehow though, Arthur had managed to break Merlin's self-control countless times since Merlin had come to Camelot.
Arthur stared at Merlin shocked. "Excuse me?" He asked incredulously. "You cannot speak to me like that."
"I don't care!" Merlin told him stubbornly. He knew he would probably end up in the stocks for this or locked in the prisons for the rest of his life, but he didn't care. "If this is what it takes to get through to you, I will. Why is it so hard for you to stand up for what you know is true. You know I wouldn't lie to you!"
"I don't know that," Arthur told him angrily. He couldn't believe the nerve of Merlin. Implying that Arthur, the crowned prince of Camelot, was a coward, afraid to stand up for himself. "And I am not afraid to stand up for what I know is true. I am a knight of Camelot!"
"Well maybe you ought to start acting like it! Why is it so hard for you to admit that you trust me?" Merlin asked him. This was entirely reckless, speaking to the prince like he was a peasant.
"Because I can't stand to disappoint my father!" Arthur snapped. Merlin stared at Arthur shocked. Arthur it seemed, couldn't believe the words that had come out of his mouth. Arthur usually kept his emotions bottled up. He didn't let anyone know what truly bothered him, didn't let anyone get to him. Yet here he stood, telling a man he had only known a few days his deepest insecurity. And once he said it, he couldn't stop. It seemed it opened a flood gate of all the thoughts Arthur had been too ashamed to voice previously. "It seems that all my father cares about is how well I fight or how princely I can act. He doesn't care about me as Arthur; he only cares about the prince of Camelot. 'Good footwork Arthur, but you need to work on that attack again.' 'Arthur, I need you to visit lower town and handle the grain dispute.' Arthur do this, Arthur do that. It's never Arthur, how are you. Arthur, I love you." Arthur's voice dropped to a whisper. "I never had a mother and some days it feels like I never had a father. I live for the moments when he regards me with pride and affection. The days are few and far between. But I do anything to make them happen. I would even fight a losing battle."
"Even if it will cost you your life?" Merlin asked him quietly. "I never knew my father, so I'm not going to pretend to understand how you feel, but Arthur think about it. Wouldn't you rather live with his disappointment than die without it?"
"I'm not sure what I would rather," Arthur told him honestly, once again shocked by his words. "You were right when you said you couldn't possibly understand. The pressure he puts on me is unbearable. I am the future of Camelot and he makes sure I never forget that. He cares more about this kingdom than he does for me."
"If you die, then there is no future of Camelot," Merlin pointed out. "And I'm sure your father cares about you more than you think. He just shows it in an odd way. By preparing you to be king as he does, he is making sure that you don't make the same mistakes he did. He is making sure you are ready for the burden so that it will not crush you. He has lost sight of the fact that you need a father as well as a king, but that doesn't mean he loves you any less."
Arthur stared at the window in his chambers for several minutes. Slowly, he turned to face Merlin. "I'm not so sure that's true," he said quietly. Merlin had only known Uther a handful of days, but Arthur had known his father all his life. Merlin didn't see the way that Arthur went from caretaker to caretaker when he was a child. He didn't see the way that Uther would bury himself in work instead of spending a few moments with Arthur. Arthur shook his head to clear it. This was not the time for self-pity. "But you're right about one thing. I am the future of Camelot." Arthur paused and Merlin saw his resolve strengthen. "I will not go back to my father. There must be another way to reveal Valiant."
"You mean, you believe me?" Merlin asked hopefully.
"I suppose you don't have a reason to lie. I already have made a fool of myself. And you've made no secret of your hatred of this position," Arthur pointed out.
Merlin smiled. "Thank you sire," he said honestly. It was more than he could ask for.
"What do we do?" Arthur asked.
"Are you asking me, an untrustworthy manservant what to do?" Merlin asked him. It was childish, but he couldn't resist the jab.
Arthur turned away from him, staring out the window again. "Sorry," Merlin quickly muttered, realizing taunting Arthur wouldn't get him anywhere. Merlin walked to Arthur's side, looking out to the courtyard where everyone was going about their normal lives. Merlin racked his brain. There had to be something he could do. Someway to summon the snakes himself. His eyes landed on a statue of a dog in the courtyard. It was tall and sat on its hind legs, holding a shield. It was the shield that gave Merlin the idea. It wasn't exactly snakes on the shield, but the curved lines reminded Merlin that magic had summoned life from wood. Maybe he could do the same from stone. And just like that, he knew what to do. If Valiant could make snakes on a shield come to life, Merlin should be able to do the same. He just had to find the right words. "Just leave it to me. I'll figure it out," Merlin told him.
Merlin turned and rushed out of Arthur's chambers. He could hear Arthur calling his name, but he didn't stop. He only had the night before the tournament would start and he never tried something like this before. He had always just made things happen, with his mind. It never required practice or incantations. But he knew this was the only way. He couldn't will the snakes to come to life, but he could order them to.
Merlin found a wheelbarrow outside the barn and took the statue from the courtyard to his chambers. He got more than a few strange looks, but he didn't care as long as no one stopped him. When he returned, he looked through his magic book until he found the spell he was looking for. He practiced it a couple of times, making sure he had the pronunciation down. When he was certain he got it right, he looked towards the dog.
"Bebay odothay arisan quickum," he said, looking at the dog expectantly. He didn't know what he expected, whether it was for the dog to leap over to him and start licking his face or to back into a corner and start growling. But he wasn't expecting for nothing to happen. The dog stood still, with the same stony expression as when Merlin had found him.
Merlin tried again and again without any luck. He refused to give up. Not with Arthur's life on the line. Merlin tried everything, with every hand movement possible. He tried every tone of voice and even switched the pronunciation a couple of times. He understood now why people had to spend years studying magic. He had never had to try so hard for something that usually came so easy to him.
It was when he was falling asleep over his magic book a few hours after the sun rose, that he muttered the spell sleepily, on the brink of giving up.
He heard a growl that immediately snapped him out of his sleepy haze. He looked up to see the dog he had been trying all night to summon.
Merlin let out a joyful chuckle. A bark from the dog jerked him back to reality. Merlin jumped to his feet, slightly alarmed. The dog wasn't acting particularly friendly and the last thing Merlin needed was to get hurt by a dog so he would be unable to get to Arthur in time.
One look out his window told him the fight would be starting soon if it hadn't already started. The sun was high in the sky. Merlin rushed from his chambers, carefully closing the door behind him. He had to get to Arthur.
As he was heading out, Gaius walked in. "Arthur is fighting Valiant," Gaius told him.
"I know, I'm on my way," Merlin told him. As he was about to leave, Merlin stopped briefly. "Oh, whatever you do, don't go in my room. I'll deal with it later." He was barely able to resist laughter at the idea of Gaius walking in on the dog, but Merlin didn't have time to explain.
Merlin ran out the door and to the arena. He could hear the clanking of swords before he even saw the tournament. He stopped right against the wall and watched as Valiant pushed Arthur up against the wall. This would be Valiant's opportune moment to summon the snakes. He could kill Arthur and Merlin wouldn't be able to stop him without revealing himself as a sorcerer to everyone.
Arthur briefly looked towards Merlin, clearly noting that he just arrived. Merlin thought Arthur almost looked relieved. Merlin smiled to himself. Arthur had trusted him when he said he would figure something out. That relief quickly vanished. When they made eye contact again, he knew Arthur had come to the same realization that this was Valiant's chance.
It was with the adrenaline that coursed through Arthur at the thought of his imminent death, that he managed to push Valiant away roughly. When Valiant stumbled, Arthur ran into him, sending Valiant back several feet.
Before either had a chance to move, Merlin made up his mind. "Bebay odothay arisan quickum," he whispered.
The snakes rose out of Valiant's shield and the crowd collectively gasped. Everyone but Merlin. Merlin was too relieved that it had actually worked. He wasn't sure that it was going to work from so far away and was grateful that it had.
"What are you doing?" Valiant asked, looking at his shield confused. "I didn't summon you."
"Now we see you for what you truly are," Arthur said. He glanced at his father and then at Merlin.
Valiant laughed. "Kill him," he ordered the snakes.
Arthur reacted quickly. Morgana threw him the sword and in one swing, he beheaded both of them. With another thrust, he had killed Valiant. It had taken a matter of seconds. Merlin saw Arthur whisper something in Valiant's ear as he withdrew his sword.
When Arthur stepped back, he didn't feel the victory he thought he would have felt when he killed Valiant. He looked at the expression of pride on his father's face, but it seemed empty to him. Arthur couldn't help the blank look he gave his father. He knew he got the message across by the tightening of his father's smile. Arthur didn't feel anything until he saw the pride on Merlin's face. He was shocked by the realization that crashed down on him. He never thought he would see the day when he cared more for a peasant's pride than his father's pride. But maybe it was the fact that Merlin didn't treat him like a prince, but like a person, that made Merlin's opinion so valuable.
Arthur grinned and raised his sword up, allowing himself to feel pride in himself as he listened to the cheers around him.
Merlin was waiting, ready to help Arthur when he left the arena. When they walked into Arthur's tent, Arthur turned to Merlin. "Strangest thing," he said quietly. "Yesterday, you left in quite a hurry. And when I saw you in the courtyard, you were pulling a statue of a dog in a wheelbarrow. And then today, you show up just in time for the snakes on Valiant's sword to appear."
"That is strange," Merlin agreed, concentrating on helping Arthur out of his armor and hoping Arthur would just dismiss it.
"The funny thing is, Valiant was under the impression that he didn't summon the snakes," Arthur said, studying Merlin for the tiniest ripple in his composure.
"That's strange Sire," Merlin told him, not making eye contact. He could feel fear knotting in his stomach. What if Arthur figured it out? It's always better to pretend to be oblivious. Arthur can't have any real proof… right?
"I personally believe a sorcerer may have been responsible for summoning the snakes so Valiant wouldn't be able to kill me," Arthur said matter-of-factly. He watched as Merlin paled slightly
Merlin still didn't look up. He seemed overly interested in Arthur's chainmail. "Oh?" Merlin asked. "Any ideas who it may have been?"
"No," Arthur said. "Magic is illegal, need I remind you. I could be wrong."
Merlin chuckled slightly. "Probably," Merlin said. "Maybe it really was just a coincidence."
"Maybe," Arthur agreed. When Merlin pulled off the last of his armor and started to leave the tent, Arthur grabbed his arm and stopped him. "But if it was a sorcerer, I would want them to know how grateful I was. I would want to say thank you."
Merlin stared for a moment, barely able to believe his ears. Arthur, the prince of Camelot, was implying that he knew Merlin was a sorcerer. Merlin couldn't help the next words that came out of his mouth. "And if it was a sorcerer, I'm sure they would want you to know that they were happy to save your life and that they will make sure that no harm comes to you," Merlin told him sincerely, uncertain of the dangerous game he was playing. He could be wrong and he could be sentencing himself to death, but instinct told him this was safe.
Arthur smiled, silently telling Merlin it will be okay. "If it were a sorcerer, I also think I should probably apologize," Arthur added. "For everything."
"I'm sure they forgive you," Merlin said, trying to fight the smile that was threatening to spread across his face.
"Good, good," Arthur said. "Now Merlin, I need you to polish my armor and…"
Merlin cut him off. "That might be difficult sire. You sacked me," Merlin pointed out.
"Did I? That doesn't sound like me," Arthur said with a small smile. "Now as I was saying, my chambers are a complete mess, my clothes need patching, my armor needs to be repaired, my bed needs to be changed, my dogs need to be walked…"
Merlin ducked out of the tent with a smile on his face, leaving Arthur to finish his list by himself. That was different.
In the tent, Arthur was sporting a similar smile. Arthur had learned something very important about himself. He had learned that he wasn't his father. He was his own person. For the first time in his life, he was okay with that.
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