Author's Note
Aight, here I am, the one that brought you "Take A Look At Me Now." After receiving such wonderful reviews that flattered me so very much, I decided to post my other fic that I've written. This is a songfic from Seifer's point of view-I could actually write another to the same song from Quistis' point of view as well, and if you guys seem to like this one, I think I just might! So please R & R and let me know what you think!
I'll Be Okay
Seifer heard the harsh, sharp sound of Rinoa's sobbing even through the patter of the constantly falling rain. The sound nearly broke his heart. The blond man stood under the walkway of the entrance to Balamb Garden, watching Rinoa for long moments. Her raven hair had curtained her face from view, but her slender shoulders shook with each sob she gave. Squall and Rinoa had gotten into a fight earlier that day, but that was all anyone knew. No one had been told what the fight was about, and since it had happened in the privacy of Squall's dorm room, there had been no one else there to hear it. Seifer's normally arrogant mouth twisted into a grimace. Each tear that fell from her eye caused a shattering pain inside of him. He loved her-there was no doubt about that. But now...what was the right thing to do?
A hand on his arm caused Seifer to turn, meeting the level, yet somewhat sad gaze of Quistis Trepe. For a moment, they looked out at Rinoa together, and then Seifer turned to face the former instructor. He knew she had feelings for Squall...she always had. And now that Squall and Rinoa had evidently broken up, she could make her move and Seifer could have Rinoa for himself. But something was aching inside of him...a strange feeling that made him wonder if that would be the right thing to do. He looked out into the rain again, then back at Quistis.
"This could work out the way we've both always wanted," Seifer said, his normally harsh voice now somewhat wistful. He had longed to take Rinoa in his arms and tell her how much he loved her, and to never let her go again. That would make him happy, yes...but...would it make Rinoa happy? Even if she grew to love him, Seifer knew deep in his heart that she would always belong to Squall.
In that case...there was only one thing to do. Looking back at Quistis, Seifer saw the same realization, only about Squall, reflected in the woman's eyes.
"I'll go talk to him...you go talk to Rinoa," she said, and disappeared back inside the front door of Garden. Seifer took a deep breath, then walked into the rain, away from the safety of the covered walkway.
Rinoa sat huddled on the front steps of Garden, shivering and sobbing still. Seifer knelt by her side, brushing a hand against her shoulder just enough to get her attention. She turned those sapphire blue eyes, now liquid with tears, to meet his gaze, and Seifer's heart all but ripped then and there. She was in so much pain. He loved her so dearly...but some things simply weren't meant to be...while others were destined from the beginning of time. He and Rinoa weren't meant to be...but Rinoa and Squall were.
It's time to let you go
It's time to say goodbye
There's no more excuses
No more tears to cry
Rinoa opened her mouth as if to speak, but Seifer silenced her with a shake of his head. Reaching down, he offered her his hand and drew her to her feet. She brushed her soaked bangs back from her eyes, which were red-rimmed from her tears. "Seifer...what are you doing out here?" she asked, giving a slight shiver from a chill that coursed up her spine.
There's been so many changes
I was so confused
All along you were the one
All the time I never knew
For a moment, Seifer couldn't speak. If he really did what he was planning to do, he would lose her forever. He had loved her since the day he met her that summer when they had been sixteen. But had he told her? Of course not. But that was his own fault. Taking a deep inner breath, Seifer laid his hands atop Rinoa's shoulders, gripping her tightly, but not harshly.
I want you to be happy
You're my best friend
But it's so hard to let you go now
All that could have been
"Rinoa," he said softly, gently, struggling to keep his voice steady. "I heard about what happened between you and Squall...and as horrid as it sounds, some part of me was delighted. I've always loved you, Rinoa, and I hate myself for not telling you sooner."
"Seifer...but I..." Rinoa was stunned, her eyes going wide. Seifer silenced her with a shake of his head, speaking again.
"I know. I know you love Squall. And I realized something...I'm not sure how I realized it, but I know it in my heart. You are meant for each other. Rinoa, you and Squall are destined to be together. It took you all your lives to find each other, and if you throw away this chance now, you're a fool. Do you understand me?" Seifer's voice was level and clear, though tears were burning at his eyes.
I'll always have the memories
But I won't have you
Fate has a way of changing
Just when you don't want it to
Rinoa's eyes held infinite sadness and longing...but not for him, Seifer realized. She only wanted Squall...and that was how it always would be. Brushing a few strands of hair back from her face which had matted there from the rain, Seifer said, "I'll never forget those times we shared, Rinoa. They're some of the best in my life because you taught me how to love someone. You showed me that there was more to this world than fighting and bloodshed and hate and murder. There's a much sweeter, more wonderful side to life that I didn't know existed until I met you. And I thank you for that. I can't thank you enough for that. You're probably the best friend I've ever had Rinoa, despite everything I've done. But...I can't change what's happened, and I won't try to. You belong with him, so go to him."
Throw away the chains
Let love fly away
Till love comes again
I'll be okay
Rinoa's eyes were liquid with tears again, and she lowered her head a bit. "But what if he...Seifer, I love him...but what if he changed his mind...? About me?" Fear tremored through her voice softly, and Seifer just shook his head.
"He hasn't, Rinoa, I know he hasn't. Squall's been in love with you since he first laid eyes on you at the SeeD ball. He just didn't know what he was feeling. But he loves you...he loves you so much. I can see it whenever he looks at you. Go to him."
Life passes so quickly
You've gotta take the time
You'll miss what really matters
You'll miss all the signs
Rinoa let Seifer's words echo though her mind for a long moment, and the realization dawned on her. She couldn't live without Squall. Seifer was right-she and Squall were meant for each other. Slowly she raised her eyes to meet Seifer's gaze and nodded. A faint smile formed at the blond man's lips. Even if he had lost his chance at happiness, she still had hers. She still had time.
I've spent my life searching
For what was always there
Sometimes it will be too late
Sometimes it won't be fair
Seifer dropped his hands from her shoulders then, and nodded his head slowly. "Go, Rinoa. Go to him now." And then he turned, slipping back towards the shadows of the back doorway of Garden.
Rinoa stood there in the rain a long moment with her eyes closed, and heard the sharp sound of a door being slammed shut. She whirled quickly, sapphire eyes wide with surprise as she saw the figure running full force towards her, calling her name.
"Rinoa!"
Rinoa's heart gave a leap. Squall had come for her. Without another thought, she ran straight into his arms, all but flinging herself upon him, Squall held her tightly, heedless of her soaked clothing and hair, murmuring against her ear.
"I'm so sorry, Rinoa...I'm so sorry...I shouldn't have..." Squall's flow of words was cut off by Rinoa placing two fingertips to his lips, silencing him. They gazed at each other for a long moment, and then Squall drew her closer, his mouth meeting hers. Rinoa's arms wrapped around him, and Squall's fingers settled in the long tresses of her hair. The rain continued to fall as they kissed, but neither seemed to care.
Seifer stood watching the two kiss, and at that moment he knew they were blessedly right...meant for each other. His heart ached, but a faint smile formed on his lips. Rinoa was happy, and that was all that mattered.
A hand on his arm jolted Seifer from his thoughts. He knew without turning that it was Quistis, and he looked down to her. "We did the right thing," he said softly. "No matter how much it hurts, we did the right thing."
Quistis nodded her agreement, turning as well to look at Squall and Rinoa. "Sometimes, when you love someone, the best thing you can do is let them go," she said in a whisper, her voice catching a bit.
Seifer looked to her and slipped his arm around her waist, turning her to face him. Quistis' eyes met his own with a startled look, and she was surprised even more when he raised a hand to her face to brush away the lone tear that escaped her eye. "Dry your eyes, instructor," Seifer said in a gentle voice. "There's always tomorrow." Quistis looked upwards into his eyes for a long moment, and slowly nodded her head.
"You've changed, Seifer...in a way I never thought you could."
Seifer just smiled, and then slipped his arm off of her waist. The smile was slightly strained, but it was definitely there. Quistis gave him a faint smile in return, then went back inside. Leaning against the wall, Seifer closed his eyes. He had thought there could be only one chance at happiness in a lifetime...but was that so? Perhaps...just perhaps...could he grow to love the woman that once had been his instructor?
Or...had he always loved her and never know it?
Seifer stood upright fully, looking one last time to Squall and Rinoa, who were now gazing into each other's eyes. "Maybe," Seifer said under his breath, "I have a second chance at...happiness. With..." He trailed off as he saw the woman standing inside the doorway as he entered Garden's lobby. The last word was spoken so faintly it might have not been spoken at all.
"Quistis."
When Seifer reached her side, he simply draped his arm across her shoulders, and she leaned slightly against him. He held her that way for a long moment before pulling away, and with a faint smile, they turned to walk down the hall, turning their backs on what might have been...now only looking to what the future might bring.