Written for Day 11 of Share the Love Month organized by MyLadyDay and Aerle over on Tumblr, a multishipping event. I chose LuNa as my ship and water as the mandatory element.
I do not own One Piece.
I'll be your water wings and save you if you start drowning
in an open tab, when your judgement's on the brink.
-"Brand New Colony" by The Postal Service
Nami had never feared the water. She had no nightmares about drowning, sinking farther and farther from the surface as the intense pressure crushed the air from her lungs. Growing up on an island, she had learned to swim almost as soon as she had learned to walk. Granted, she wasn't as strong a swimmer as Sanji, but she could keep her head above water in fairly rough seas and had even saved Luffy and Chopper on several occasions.
But Nami had no problem imagining what it must be like for the Devil Fruit users on the crew to be submerged. Not because she had ever come close to drowning in the ocean (or even the bathtub, in Luffy's case), but because of a different kind of drowning.
Most days she was fine. In fact, Nami had gone weeks and months without incident before. But some days, especially on the Grand Line, the barometric pressure would fall to just the right point and the wind would pick up and a special kind of storm would begin to brew in the tumultuous atmosphere. It wasn't a cyclone or a hurricane. Water spouts didn't bother Nami, nor did freak blizzards. No, it was the simplest of thunderstorms and their warm showers that made her ache.
It had begun that morning. She had set their course from Fishman Island to the next island that seemed most stable, when she'd felt a shift in the air. It wasn't a big change. The Straw Hat Pirates would face no life-threatening storms or fire and brimstone or whatever in the rough waters of the New World that day. Nami had simply warned the others of rain, ensuring that they donned their raincoats, and then disappeared into the aquarium bar below deck.
On days like today, Nami needed to be alone.
The aquarium bar was blissfully quiet and empty as she slipped inside. The water cast the room in a cool, calming blue glow that rippled and waved around the room as the fish inside created their own currents. Nami stared at them in silence for a full minute before walking to the bar, her sandals clacking against the tile floor, filling the room with their echoes.
She found the bar well stocked as always. Occasionally obnoxious cooing and wooing aside, Sanji did his job well. There was a wide assortment of alcohol beneath the lacquered countertop, from the cheap sake that the cook had labeled with Zoro's name and a dictionary worth of profanities to fine wines that were expressly saved for Robin's refined palate. There was a bottle of aged whiskey that Sanji had picked up in Logue Town and schnapps—courteous of Doctor Kureha—from Drum Island. Nami's hand hovered momentarily over a bottle of sweet wine that Vivi had gifted to her before they had left Alabasta and then thought better of it. This wasn't the kind of day or the kind of mood where she wanted to drink something so precious. Instead, she selected one of Zoro's sake bottles (one with a high alcohol content), grabbed a glass, and took a seat at the bar.
As it turned out, the stopper had been put in the bottle by someone with superhuman strength and it took Nami several minutes to pry it out, even with the help of a bottle opener. The sharp smell of potent alcohol stung at the inside of her nose the moment the bottle was uncorked, leaving her giddy. Nami wasted no time in pouring out a healthy dose and quickly downed it, relishing in the fiery burn as the cheap sake ran down the back of her throat. This would do nicely.
Several glasses later found the bottle significantly lighter and Nami swaying slightly in her seat. But the lightheadedness created by her buzz did little to affect her mood and, if anything, had only made the ache she'd felt since that morning more potent. Cradling her glass with one hand, Nami slowly slid the other up her arm, lightly brushing her fingertips against her tattoo. She continued her journey unhindered until she felt the raised lines of her scars.
This was why she was here. This storm—the feel of the wind, the smell in the air, the fall of the rain—it was exactly like that day in Cocoyashi Village when she had denounced Arlong with her brutal attempt to cut his mark from her flesh.
Nami had had days like this before since joining Luffy's crew. Chopper had even examined her once, just outside of Water 7. He had explained to her that she had cut herself rather deeply with that knife, and that old wounds like that tended to hurt on occasion. The little reindeer had even offered to prescribe her some mild pain medication to help her get through the bad days, but Nami had turned him down. She was tough. Bellemere had raised her to be. She could handle a little weather-induced pain.
Then she had seen the horrors at Sabaody, had heard the history of Fishman Island. Nami hated Arlong. She hated him for hurting the others in her hometown and for marking her as his people had been marked. She hated him for the terror and the nightmares and all the lost years of her life. But most of all, Nami hated him for taking Bellemere away. But now, she couldn't ignore his past. It bit at her, nagging at her conscience with enough force to make her lose sleep and nausea burn at her throat.
Nami clutched more tightly at her scarred shoulder. Did Hachi hurt like this where he had been marked? Did Caimi wake up at night with the painful memories of the bruises left by the slave collar circling her neck? Nami was confronted by the wrong done to her abuser and suddenly she understood him better. And yet she still couldn't reconcile the bitter hate that she felt when she thought about her adopted mother, when she saw her stunned expression as Arlong's bullet pierced her body.
Nami shuddered and finished off the bottle, reaching immediately below the counter for another. Zoro would probably complain, but it was bought with the money that she budgeted anyway, so he would just have to suck it up.
This one uncorked more easily and Nami finished it in even less time than the first. But the tears didn't start to fall until halfway through the third.
She didn't want to be angry nor did she want to carry it forever. Erasing Arlong's tattoo from her shoulder had been as symbolic as it had been literal. She had intended to move on, and yet her past and his were catching up to her.
Nami hiccupped and leaned heavily over the counter, watching through bleary eyes as large tears dripped onto the polished wood. She could feel her nose running, some of it trying to drip down her face, but most of it coating the back of her throat. It made the alcohol stick uncomfortably and tainted the taste. But then, this was why she had chosen Zoro's cheap brand of drink.
All of a sudden, the door burst open behind her, momentarily bathing the blue room in the warm glow of the lights in the hall outside, before it was slammed unceremoniously closed again. Nami watched, her brow creased with emotion and irritation, as her oblivious captain bounced into the bar, a wide grin splitting his face. He didn't seem to notice her at first. Rather, Luffy was focused on the aquarium in front of him, where a large snake-like, eel, tuna, giraffe, fish-whatever thing had just been dumped into the tank. It floated in the water, momentarily stunned, before coming to its senses and swimming wide, aggressive circles around the aquarium, asserting its dominance to the other fish inside. Luffy laughed excitedly as he watched, coming to take a seat beside Nami at the bar.
"Isn't it great, Nami?" asked Luffy, still focused intently on the freshly caught Sea King. "Sanji said he'd make barbeque with it tonight! He said he'd get started as soon as it stopped raining. Ne, Nami, when will it stop raining?"
Nami sniffed and gulped down another swallow of sake, this time straight from the bottle. She didn't have the patience for this. Not today.
"Nami?" prodded Luffy, sparing her a glance. "Do you know? It's okay if you don't, but it would be really cool if you do!"
He laughed to himself again and then turned back to the aquarium, the smile slowly falling from his face. Captain and navigator sat together in an awkward silence, both of them watching the doomed dinner swimming around the aquarium.
"You know, Nami, I'm really proud of you," Luffy finally said, his voice significantly lower than it had been before. When Nami didn't answer, he continued. "I don't know what all happened between you and Arlong, or everything that he did to you, but what you did for Jinbei…that was a big deal."
Nami could feel the tide of her emotions rising. It had been flowing since the build up to the storm that morning, flooding in like so much sea water and threatening to drown her. She choked back a sob, took a shaky breath, and then held it as she plunged deeper into her borrowed alcohol.
"You could have done what Arlong did," Luffy went on, "you could have kept the cycle going, but you didn't. And you know what?"
Luffy turned to face her fully.
"That makes you really strong."
Finally, Nami broke eye contact with her glass to meet her captain's gaze. She was met with an expression that was all at once serious, yet open and earnest. Luffy had meant every word, however simple they were and suddenly her hopelessness began to ebb.
He placed a hand over the one that Nami had wrapped around her glass, his thumb worrying at her palm until he'd coaxed it away. Luffy held it for a minute and then suddenly pulled her into a fierce hug, holding her close enough that the dampness on his vest soaked through her shirt. And Nami, who had somehow held it all together through the tumult of their separation at Sabaody and the two years away and the battle and revelations on Fishman Island, broke down. The tears spilled from her eyes and down her cheeks, rivaling the pounding rain above deck. She shook in Luffy's arms as the flood of emotion overwhelmed her. Her fear, her hate, her guilt for things she had or hadn't done. All of the things that she had no power to change pressed in on her, filling her eyes and her nose and her throat. Luffy held onto her through it all, keeping her afloat in her own private storm. As she broke, Nami felt his hands on her back, one of them holding her close while the other rubbed soothing circles over her enflamed scar tissue.
And then it passed and the imaginary flood water receded and Nami could breathe again. She remained quivering in Luffy's arms as she drew one grateful breath after another into her starved lungs, thankful for the support of his body, because she might have fallen over otherwise. They stayed still for several minutes, the blue light of the water bathing them in baptismal light and the silence only broken by Nami's ragged breathing. It was only when she felt Luffy begin to fidget that Nami pulled away.
She wiped at her eyes and sniffled, giving her captain a weak smile. "I think the storm may have passed."
"Yeah?" Luffy grinned widely. "Can we have meat now?"
"Yeah. If Sanji's up for it, we can," said Nami. "It's a little early, but I'm sure he'll do it for me."
"You'd do that?" asked Luffy.
Nami nodded. "Just don't tell the others. They'll think I'm going soft. Now, help me up."
"Right!"
With that, Luffy quickly pulled her from the stool, not saying a word when she had to steady herself against his shoulder. Normally, she would dread fielding the barrage of questions from the rest of the crew when they saw the tear-stained state she was likely in, but with Luffy by her side, it didn't seem so bad. She only stumbled a little as they made their way to the door, each step becoming stronger than the last. Nami was quiet as they walked, silently relishing in her ability to breathe unhindered as she listened to Luffy sing about his unending love for meat. Just before his hand reached the knob, however, he stopped and turned to her, concern written across his face.
"Hey, Nami. Do you think the storm will come back?"
Nami paused and frowned, sparing a glance back at the empty bottles on the bar and thinking about all of the unopened ones underneath it. All of those bottles that she wouldn't be touching unless it was in celebration with her nakama.
"No, Luffy. I think it's gone for good."
