Jayne was pacin' – and pacin'. "How much longer is it gonna be?" he asked in frustration.
"Be patient Jayne," Inara teetered on a chair as she hung decorations. "These things take time."
"I done my part. I got the tree like Kaylee wanted," he ticked the jobs finished on his fingers. "Wrapped the presents, shot somethin' to eat…"
"Be patient Jayne," Inara reiterated. "We're nearly finished decorating, everything else is ready and Kaylee will be here soon."
"She'd better be. They better be lookin' after her," Jayne growled. To him Kaylee and Christmas just went together. You couldn't have one without the other…
A Merry little Christmas – pre-series
Kaylee had been feelin' awful homesick lately, it bein' her first Christmas away and all. She probably talked about it so much that everyone was tired of listening to her. She was pleased as punch when the Captain said that if she did the work, she could have a party…
"Ya want me to do what??" Jayne asked his new Captain in amazement.
"Want you to go out and cut down a Christmas tree." Mal answered as if it was an everyday request.
Never in all the years he'd been in the Black had Jayne gone lookin' for a Christmas tree. He'd never been asked to either. Out here Christmas was the same as any other time. If ya got a day off ya were lucky. 'Course most crews he'd worked with didn't pal around like this one did neither, so there weren't no-one to celebrate with anyway.
Maybe Mal was pullin' his leg. The man had a strange sense of humour and Jayne hadn't got a real handle on him yet. "A Christmas tree?" he asked just to be sure.
"A gorramn Christmas tree," the Captain confirmed.
"I'll come with ya," a cheerful voice proclaimed as the ship's mechanic bounced into the hold. "Ya gotta know exactly what sort to have, it has to stand up and fit and all."
Jayne glanced at the Captain rollin' his eyes in the background and grinned sardonically. Now he knew why he had to go get a tree. He hadn't been on the ship a week before he'd realised that everyone made a pet of perky Kaylee.
He'd been sorta surprised to find one such as her on the boat. There were girl mechanics around of course, but most weren't as good at mechanicin' as her and he was willin' to bet, there weren't many as bubbly, innocent or cheerful either. The Captain gave her a long rein most times, only gettin' all stern when there was a job on.
"I love Christmas, don't you?" She chattered as they walked i (the girl never stopped chatterin') /i , "all the presents, celebrations and happy times."
The last real celebration he'd been to was back home more than twenty years ago. "Don't rightly know."
"Ya don't know?" Kaylee peered up at him horrified.
She loved this time of year and couldn't understand anyone not likin' it. She'd got the feelin' that aside from Wash none of her shipmates had celebrated the holiday for a long time. It'd taken ages to talk the Captain round and she was determined that everyone was goin' to enjoy it. "Well yer gonna have a good Christmas this year anyhow."
"If ya hit it just there, it'll be the right height." Kaylee pointed helpfully at the trunk.
Jayne grunted and started to swing the axe. They'd spent hours lookin' for a tree that fit the girl's specifications and she'd been givin' him instructions ever since. "I know how to chop," he snapped.
"I'm just bein' helpful," Kaylee snapped back, hands on hips. "Ya don't have to be so snippy."
"Snippy?" Jayne admired the flush stainin' her cheeks and the way she stood up to him. Not many folks did when he growled at them like he just had.
"Snippy," Kaylee watched him swing the axe and cut through the trunk with ease. "Are ya gonna be grumpy if I help carry it back?"
"Ya gotta be kiddin' girl. I'm not that fond of hard work."
Grinnin' at him, her good mood restored she moved to the tip of the tree and hefted it. "Well let's get goin' then."
She'd chattered all the way back of course, but he'd found himself not minding it so much. Not mindin' cause back totin' the heavy part of the tree he had a great view of Kaylee's very womanly body.
Before this he'd been too busy starin' at Zoë and the Companion to really notice the girl. But he were noticin' her now and wishin' she weren't a crew mate.
He didn't have many rules in his life, but sexin' folks he worked with was out. It led to too many complications. But he didn't have any rules against lookin' so he kept watchin' her all the way back to the boat.
Thank Buddha he'd managed, with a lot of growling, to get out of decoratin' the tree and all the other preparations. Now he was drinkin' some of the girl's engine-distilled brew, eatin' a pretty good protein dinner and watchin' the others celebratin'.
"See, isn't this fun?" Kaylee sidled up to him beamin'. "Did ya like yer present?"
"Yeah," Jayne replied awkwardly. He didn't rightly know what to say. The girl musta spent ages gettin' gifts ready. Everyone had somethin' hand-made from her, includin' him.
The sexy Companion got some girly thing and the weird pilot a stuffed dinosaur i (a man growed playin' with dinosaurs?) /i . Zoë and the Captain got a weapon belt each and she'd done some pretty good guessin' 'bout what he'd like too.
He looked down at the roll of material in his hand, loops and pockets sewn all over it. "There's room for all my stuff here."
"It'll make cleanin' yer guns easier." Kaylee nodded in agreement. "I knew soon as I saw ya cleanin' them what was needed."
It kinda made him uncomfortable that she already knew him well enough to see what was important to him. But he liked the way she accepted him and didn't treat him like he was stupid and he really liked lookin' at her. It got him thinkin' that maybe he'd stay here a bit longer than he'd first thought.
Happy golden days– between Heart of Gold and Objects in Space
Her first Christmas on Serenity had turned out good Kaylee thought. Even Jayne had joined in. With more folks on board this year she was hopin' to make the second a really wonderful one. She and River planned a grand celebration; with decorations, presents and lots of Mistletoe everywhere so maybe a certain Doctor would kiss her.
That would be shiny of course and maybe it could even lead to sexin'; but Kaylee was also thinkin' that after all their problems of the last year everyone could do with a break. Simon and River hadn't really relaxed since they got on the ship and hardly ever got to go out. The Captain and Zoë were still feelin' sad 'bout Tracey and somethin' was more wrong than usual between Inara and the Captain.
Kaylee was more determined than ever to give everyone a happy time and worked real hard on the Captain, flutterin' her eyelashes, pountin' and beggin'…
"Alright Kaylee," Mal couldn't stand it anymore. "Seeing we stuck here for a couple of days, you can have your celebration."
"Thanks Captain!" she leant forward to kiss his cheek. "Ya won't regret it, ya might even have fun. We're gonna have a secret Santa!"
"That don't mean I have to dress up or anything does it?" Mal asked Jayne who was watching with amusement.
"Don't ask me, but if it does, it's ya that has 't do it."
"Ya don't dress up. Ya just gotta draw a name out of this hat…"
"Hey that's my hat!"
"And ya gotta a buy a present for that person only," Kaylee continued.
"Captain never said nothin' 'bout buyin' presents," Jayne glanced at Mal pleadingly.
"You've only got to buy one Jayne," Kaylee shook his hat at him and the Captain grinned. "Ya choose first, then the Captain."
"Well now Kaylee," Mal stepped back as Jayne reached in the hat. "Don't I get a dispensation?"
"Everybody's gotta pick, it won't work otherwise."
"Yeah Mal, the Captain has to show a good example."
"Wish I hadn't said yes now," Mal reached into the hat and looked at the slip of paper. "Really wish I hadn't."
Kaylee giggled as she watched the Captain stomp off. "Jayne," she leaned close and smiled at him. "Remember last year? Helpin' me look for a Christmas tree?"
"Yeah," he looked at her warily. "But ya don't need me this time do ya? The crazy girl can help and the Doc."
"They're gonna help later. I don't think either of them would be any good at choppin' and stuff."
She was probably right there. The Doc in all likelihood had never even i held /i an axe and the crazy girl? Jayne shuddered. Lettin' her near a sharp instrument could be all kinds of dangerous. "What 'bout the Shepherd?" he suggested.
"He's got a job here," Kaylee grinned at him and widened her eyes. "The Captain won't do it and Wash is gone somewhere with Zoë…"
"Alright, alright," Jayne grumbled. "Don't start that eye stuff with me. I'll come. But you owe me girl, that's for sure."
Now it was Kaylee's turn to be wary, "what sorta owin' we talkin' 'bout here?"
"The kind where ya don't keep tellin' me what to do every five seconds and the kind where ya help me find a present for my Secret Santa."
Jayne watched with resignation as Kaylee drafted the Tams to help decorate the tree. Well she knew he weren't gonna do it; it weren't manly and he'd made himself pretty clear last year. So it was his own fault he had to watch her and the zhui lei Doctor made googly eyes at each other.
He wished he'd never made the stupid rule 'bout not sexin' crew mates. Not that he thought Kaylee would ever go for him, but he shoulda tried. Now the girl was all wrapped up in the doctor and never saw anyone else.
The Doc was interested in her too for all his stupid actions and even though he kept makin' the girl mad, somehow they were getting' closer. Right now they were so busy starin' they didn't notice the crazy girl start gettin' all enthusiastic and throwin' tinsel all over the cargo bay.
Mal was gonna have a heart attack the first time he caught sight of the over-decorated bay, that might make all the fussin' worth it Jayne grinned to himself. What really made everythin' worth it was Kaylee comin' with him to help choose the ruttin' Secret Santa gift.
Of course he'd picked the Doc's name outta the hat and had no idea what to buy. With Kaylee she'd know what to buy and be happy doin' it too.
"Ya sure that's what I should get?" he looked doubtfully at the satchel in the girl's hands. "I thought you'd go for somethin' more fancy."
"Maybe, but I don't know what's fancy enough." Kaylee looked around the small shop, "and I know Simon thinks he needs a new medical bag. This'd be shiny for that, see it's got all those pockets and loops and things. It'd make a good present."
She'd been right too. The Doc had really liked the bag and his approval had sent Kaylee's happiness rocketin'. The other Secret Santa presents had folks jokin' around, and bein' friendly. The Shepherd cooked a for real turkey and determined to make Kaylee's Christmas a happy one, Jayne was careful not to do or say anythin' to make folks upset.
He was rewarded and stunned when Kaylee leant forward and gave him a friendly kiss on the cheek. "Merry Christmas Jayne."
Faithful friends who are dear to us – Post BDM
Everyone was sad, it didn't feel much like Christmas this year; even to Kaylee.
Although Miranda was months ago, she still missed Wash somethin' awful; he'd always thrown himself into the preparations, she could only imagine what Zoe might be feelin'. The Shepherd was gone and so was Haven. He and she had had little plans for a celebration there this year. The Captain took a long time to get better from his hurts and was now busy tryin' to make new contacts. River and Jayne missed the Shepherd badly and she and Simon had drifted apart.
After all her chasin' and Simon's words to her, they'd been together only a little while before realisin' that they worked better as friends. Now that all the sexual tension was gone from their relationship, Kaylee could see it. But that didn't stop the hurtin' of course.
All this sad thinkin' was no good, maybe her Mama had somethin' happy to say. She turned to her letter and read out loud "Christmas is at our place this year. Everyone is coming, even Dave and Lizzie. Things sure are hectic while we get ready.
I know you've had a hard time this last year, but feel that a good Christmas can work wonders. I sent you a parcel baby girl and hope you and your crewmates have a merry time. Your Pa sends his love and so do I. Lots of Love Mama."
Kaylee sat back against the cushions. "She sounds happy, don't she?"
"And very busy too," Inara agreed. "How many people is she expecting for the occasion?"
"Fifty, maybe sixty folks," Kaylee smiled at her friend. She was so glad 'Nara had stayed.
"Most of them relatives, they'll be eatin' and talkin' for days before and after." She sighed again. "I don't reckon the Captain will wantin' a celebration this year, maybe there's too many folks missin'."
Inara shared a glance with Jayne who was sitting cleaning his weapons and listening to everything Kaylee said. "I don't agree mei mei. Your Mama is right, a small celebration may be what everyone needs right now."
"Do ya think so?" Kaylee was doubtful.
"Shepherd would agree," Jayne butted in. "He was all for folks carryin' on."
"Why not open the parcel your Mama sent?" Inara suggested again, "Perhaps it might give you some ideas."
"Oh my," Inara breathed.
"Yer Mama sure went all out, didn't she?" Jayne checked out all the stuff spread over the table. "What's this?"
"White Christmas, we make it every year." Kaylee slapped his hand, "it ain't for eatin' now Jayne."
"So yer gonna use it?" he watched her face carefully. The girl hadn't been her smiley, chatterin' self for a long time. He was hopin' this parcel would bring her back, he missed her. He could tell 'Nara was worried 'bout her too, she was waitin' all kinds of anxious for Kaylee's answer.
"Can't not use it, Mama sent it for Christmas." Kaylee was horrified at his question, "maybe I'll ask the Captain after all. A little party couldn't hurt."
"I'll ask Mal." Inara said.
"Ask Mal what?" Zoe asked coming in and looking at the table. "We having a Christmas party?"
"Kaylee thinks Mal won't like it." Jayne was blunt, "what with folks missin' and all."
"Jayne!" both Inara and Kaylee hissed.
"Wash wouldn't want us missin' Christmas on his account and neither would the Shepherd." Zoe's expression was serious, "I think we should do it and I'm asking Kaylee to organise it like always."
"Shiny." Kaylee bounced right into action, "'Nara if ya pack this stuff up, Jayne and me will go get a tree while we're still planet side."
"What'll we do for a tree?" Kaylee asked. "There ain't any forests round here."
"Figured we'd buy one."
"Buy one?" she goggled at him. Jayne never liked spendin' his coin 'cept on weapons and women. "I don't have much coin; I spent it on a new belt pump."
"I've got money. I just don't want ya choosin' one we gotta spend all my coin on dong ma?" Jayne growled. "I need that money for other things."
"Sure Jayne," Kaylee grinned at him her face brightenin' for a moment. "I won't pick anythin' too big – I promise."
And she hadn't either. Despite her eyes strayin' to the big trees; she'd picked a tree small enough that he coulda bought three of them and still had money left.
"Ya sure that's the one ya want, its awful small?"
"Well…"
"All those decorations ya got are gonna swamp it." Jayne grinned and poked her givin' nature, "I'm thinkin' Zoe expects somethin' bigger."
"Can ya afford that one?" Kaylee pointed at a middle-sized tree, she really wanted this Christmas to be good for Zoe. "It'd fit all the decorations and things."
"It looks beautiful don't it?" Kaylee smiled at the decorated tree in the middle of the room.
They were havin' a good Christmas after all. Zoe had set Wash's dinosaurs on the table and placed the Shepherd's book beside them, it sorta felt like their friends were with them. The Captain hadn't said anythin' crochety. In fact he was sittin' mighty close to Inara and smilin', "I think everyone's doin' ok."
"Yeah," Jayne agreed admirin' her bright eyes and not even lookin' at the tree or the rest of the crew. "This White Christmas stuff ain't half bad."
"Yer not eatin' it all are ya?" she took a swift look at the table, relieved to see there was still plenty to eat.
"Would I do that girl?"
"Yes," Kaylee grinned. "But I'll trade ya."
"What for?"
"Ya play the guitar for us and I'll let ya eat all the rest of the White Christmas."
"Done," Jayne smiled at her and went to get his guitar. Lucky for him she didn't know he'd do anythin' for her, even without the bribery.
If the fates allow – one year later
"Jayne!" Kaylee came clatterin' down the stairs. "The Captain said yes. That means ya gotta come with me to get the tree."
"It's freezin' out there. Can't someone else do it?"
"No it's gotta be ya. It's traditional now; ya and me get the Christmas tree."
"We got a tradition now?"
"Makes it all family like don't it? Kaylee agreed.
Jayne supposed it did and it surprised him mightily that he liked it. Maybe he'd changed some just like Serenity and the other folks on board had.
They still had ups and downs, jobs went smooth and jobs went way south.
Zoë was back. She weren't quite the same as when Wash was alive, but she joked and laughed and stayed the only one the Captain really listened to.
The Captain and Inara had finally stopped dancin' and moved in together. Inara still worked for the guild, but as an instructor not a Companion and that seemed to have settled somethin' for the arguin' pair.
The crazy girl weren't hardly crazy no more and she'd turned into a real good pilot. She painted pictures (Kaylee said they were beautiful) and even sold some of them. Her bein' not so crazy meant the Doc sorta relaxed. He weren't always worryin' 'bout stuff and got to be almost good company.
It worried Jayne some that now the Doc had more time he might be noticin' Kaylee again, that he might want her back. He didn't really know how he'd cope if that happened.
He and Kaylee had been gettin' real close. Not just friends close – that they'd always been, but something better. He'd long since given up on the not sexin' crew mates rule, given up on the just sexin' thing too if truth were told. He just plain wanted Kaylee.
He knew he weren't the most subtle person in the 'verse and this last year he'd been showin' her pretty straight what he wanted. The trouble was he didn't know if it was workin'.
Kaylee sat with him when they went out, sought him out when they was on board, had even held his hand a time or two, but she didn't go no further and he hadn't pushed it either. For the first time in his life he was playin' things careful and it was frustratin' him all to hell. He made up his mind that as soon as Christmas was over, he was gonna ask her straight out if she wanted him.
As they walked Kaylee glanced at Jayne from under her lashes. Why wouldn't he say anythin'?
She was tired of him takin' it slow (least that's what she thought he was doing), tired of him bein' careful. That just weren't Jayne and that's who she wanted.
It had taken her awhile to realise it, but the mercenary had wormed his way into her heart and he weren't goin' anywhere. Their friendship had changed and got better and now was the time to get together. If he weren't gonna make the first move, she would. Kaylee's lips curved in a smile – she had just the right idea!!
Christmas was almost over now thank Buddha. Kaylee had arranged everything just right, like she always did and had had a wonderful time. Seein' her like that made him all the more determined to talk to her pretty quick. He was startin' to rehearse the talk he was gonna have with her when Kaylee's voice drew him like a magnet.
"Jayne, see where I'm standing?"
"In the doorway?" he ventured, puzzled.
"Jayne," she sighed and shook her head. "It ain't just a doorway, look up."
Obediently he looked above her head to see lots of green spiky leaves suspended there. "Yeah?"
"It's Mistletoe you big ox!" She was openly laughin' at him now, her eyes all sparklin'. "You gotta kiss whoever stands under it."
"Even Mal?" Jayne teased as he stood up.
"Well he ain't here right now."
"Pity," he wrapped his arms round her waist, pleased when she didn't turn away. "Guess you'll have to do then."
"I catch ya kissin' Mal or anyone else I'm gonna hit ya with my wrench." Kaylee flung her arms round his neck. "Ya kiss me under here, yer mine. It's a rule."
"Does the same apply to ya?"
"Yes."
"Good," Jayne pulled her closer and fastened his lips to hers kissin' her deeply. "'Cause I ain't lettin' you go ever."
We'll muddle through somehow - the next year
"Jayne!" Mal yelled in a less than Captainy manner. "Get down here."
"Don't have to holler Mal," the mercenary appeared beside him. "Where's Kaylee?"
"In the shuttle, I can't carry her. I got shot again."
"Thought this was supposed to be an easy job?" Jayne pushed past him hastily.
The Captain scowled, "and I thought Kaylee wasn't due for another month."
"I weren't Captain. Don't be such a grumpy-pants."
"It was your screaming like that got me shot."
"My waters broke!" Kaylee giggled, "I got a shock is all."
"And all the yelling in the shuttle, I'm lucky my hand ain't broke." Mal grumbled as he followed his crew to the infirmary. "Next time Zoë does the hand holding and I fly the shuttle."
"Next time it could be Inara sir. You might get jealous."
"I'm ignoring that. Please tell me the Doc's got everything ready?"
"The Doc's got everything ready," Simon replied ushering Jayne and his burden into the infirmary. "But I need room to work, so everyone except Jayne can leave."
"Ya could be finishin' all the Christmas stuff," Kaylee suggested helpfully.
"Do you think you really need all the extra excitement this year?"
"Yes she does sir," Zoë said as she eased him out the door. "We're all looking forward to it. I've got my Secret Santa gift wrapped and everything."
"Can we open our presents now?" Mal asked.
"No." All three voices answered at once.
"We're waiting for the others." Inara said firmly.
"Well how long are they gonna be?"
"The screaming's stopped, so not long I'm thinking."
"Another soul, something new to listen to," River's voice was dreamy. "You've all got so boring."
"Thanks for sharing Albatross. Can you tell if their any closer to coming here?"
"Sound the trumpets a procession is coming."
"Well did all that screaming produce something?" Mal asked impatiently as Simon stepped aside to let Jayne and his armful past.
"I got me another girl to look after," Jayne's chest puffed out proudly.
"Holly," Kaylee said. "Seein' she was born at Christmas time and all."
"She's beautiful mei mei," Inara said as the women on board gravitated toward the baby.
"Hope she ain't as cross-grained as Jayne that could be downright worrisome."
"I like cross-grained things Captain," Kaylee smiled. "Now ain't it about time ya opened yer presents?"
"I thought you'd never ask." Mal grabbed the nearest gift with his name on it.
"Mal as Captain you're supposed to distribute to the others first," Inara hurried after him.
Kaylee watched the crew gather round the tree. "I didn't get time to get ya a present," she mourned.
"Don't matter," Jayne sat down beside his girls. "I got me the best Christmas present ever right here."