Not alone

When she wakes up, Haymitch's still there—there and smiling softly with his arm still folded around over her hip. They're sharing a pillow and though he's awake, he's made no effort to move. He's still there beside her where she last remembers him, his fingers stroking lightly over the blanket that covers her—and for a split second, a grin tugs at the corner of her mouth and she's able to forget what today will bring.

"You didn't leave," she murmurs. "I…didn't expect to find you here. I thought you'd have gone back to your room."

"I hope you're not disappointed," he replies in a voice just above a whisper, still making no attempt to pull away from her. "You were so upset last night…I didn't want you to wake up alone."

"I'm not disappointed at all," she confesses, pressing her eyes closed and wishing she could stay this way—cocooned in a warm blanket with him—for the rest of the day and forget about everything else. It's easy to forget when she's with him, to pretend that the rest of the world doesn't exist and to pretend she doesn't do something horrible to rip apart children's lives every year.

He looks at her and the only word that could pass through his mind when she is like this is: Beautiful.

There's a part of him that's always wished they could have met under different circumstances—in a different time, in a different place—when he wasn't so broken, when the world wasn't working against him, and when he could have offered her more than what he can.

He presses his lips to her forehead and her breath catches. He loves the sound her mouth does. He knows that nobody could make her feels this way.

Effie opens her eyes for a brief moment, she thinks to ask him what he's doing—they've never quite been like this together—so soft and intimate—but when she pulls back to look at him, his grey eyes are warm and he's looking at her in a way that makes her heart beat faster and makes her shoulders relax. She recognises that look, It's the same that she has after they fucked. It's been years that for her what they have done wasn't only fucking or scratching an itch. It is more than that. She feels.

Feeling herself losing herself to the moment, she takes a long breath and pushes away from him, sitting up and pulling the blanket tight around her chest, needing a bit of distance between them to clear her head.

"Effs, what's…"

"I love you," she hears herself say, the words leaving her lips before they'd fully registered, and immediately, she feels a sense of regret wash over her. Haymitch shifts on the bed and she grimaces—she hadn't meant to say it and her cheeks flush red in embarrassment. It wasn't supposed to be this way; this wasn't how it was supposed to end.

But he doesn't get up and he doesn't leave. Instead, he shifts up to sit beside her and slides his hand across her back, reaching out and sweeping her hair to one side—and she realizes that it's not the end—she as honest about her feelings and he didn't withdraw or push away. Instead, he presses a few feathery kisses along the crook of her neck as his arms wrap around her. "You don't love me" he tells her, as his lips brush against her jaw. His voice isn't steady.

"I do" She protests. "And I have for some time."

"You…do?" He asks, turning to face her, not quite believing that it's possible that she could love something as broken as he, but wanting desperately to believe it.

When she nods with a tentative smile edges her lips, and She starts to Talk again, He kisses her. Hard. He hopes that She will understand what He doesn't express with words. He had thought that if He heard those words He would have run away, He didn't expect the warm feeling inside his chest.

He doesn't ask why she has decided to tell these words to him now. He knows why. She knows about the rebellion. She isn't so stupid as she wants the people to believe. He knows better. They have known each other for almost eight years.

She didn't expect this reaction. She had thought He would have laugh at her for being so foolish, but He didn't. Now He is kissing her like there will be no tomorrow. And Maybe there won't.

When he breaks the kiss, they are panting. After few minutes of silence he speaks. His voice is like a murmur.

"Effie, no matter what happens today and no matter what happens tomorrow," he says as he hugs her a little bit closer, pulling her into his arms and pressing a kiss to her temple. She closes her eyes as warm tears begin to well, and she leans into him, letting him hold her as she tries to brace herself for what lies ahead.

"As hard as it'll be, you won't be alone." Her head rests on his shoulder and a faint smile forms over her lips because for the first time in such a long time, she actually believes that.

Author's note

Hi, this is my first Hayffie fic, but also it is the first story in English. I hope I didn't make any mistake, if I did please be kind because English is not my first language