AN: So, I'm taking another break on working on my cloak. It's become a lot of work and I keep getting distracted, so I figured why not sit down and try to write something else?
On that note, this is going to be a Merdred story eventually.
Enjoy
The silence was broken be soft sighs.
Everyone was asleep, which the warlock was glad for. The hunting trip that they were on their way back from had been long and draining, but Merlin couldn't make himself sleep.
"Emrys, what's wrong? Why aren't you asleep?"
The Druid's voice in his mind startled him, but Merlin only glanced over at him to see him sitting against a tree, on watch. He gave a wan smile, exhaustion filling him for a moment.
Mordred smiled in amusement as he watched Merlin fight sleep, speaking to him once more. "Get some rest. No harm will come to anyone on my watch, I promise,"
And the warlock believed him, solely because he could feel the sincerity that Mordred said the words with. Not long after, he laid down, letting the darkness of sleep engulf him.
The sun was just beginning to rise when he woke up. Mordred was stirring as well and Percival was on watch, about to stand and stretch before helping to wake everyone up.
Merlin smiled faintly at the fact that Mordred had kept his word of none of them coming to harm as he stood, rolling his blanket up and beginning to rebuild the fire so he could make breakfast for everyone.
Mordred didn't get in his way, though he gave a wary look as he watched the slow way in which the warlock moved, like he was hurt. He'd been moving like that all of yesterday too.
As soon as Merlin was in a stationary place, he spoke. "Are you alright?"
Merlin glanced up at him curiously before he shrugged, nodding. "Yeah, fine. Why?"
"You're moving like you're hurt," Mordred pointed out quietly as he watched Merlin work.
No response came, and not long after, everyone was awake and eating.
Mordred didn't push the topic. He contented himself to chat with the other Knights on the way back, keeping a careful eye trained on Merlin without anyone else noticing.
But it didn't slip by Gwaine's notice. "Keeping an eye on our favorite servant, are we?" he asked calmly.
Mordred looked over at him in surprise. "Why would I be?"
Gwaine gave a knowing grin before he spoke. "I won't say anything. Just don't let Arthur notice unless you want trouble,"
The Druid couldn't seem to find a way to reply to this, so he only nodded and allowed the others to chat without inputting much himself.
Once they arrived back at Camelot, Mordred helped get the horses put away before he disappeared.
Everyone else noticed the frown on his face and the confused darkness hiding in his eyes.
"What'd you say to him?" Arthur asked of Gwaine once the Druid had disappeared from sight.
Gwaine shrugged. "No idea. We were just talking and he sort of just...shut down and seemed to be lost in thought," he commented. "Don't worry, Princess, I'm sure it's nothing."
Arthur rolled his eyes, letting the topic drop and leaving.
The next week found Mordred watching everyone much more, like he was trying to understand something.
And all too suddenly, Merlin knew that he'd found out about the exact thing he'd hoped not to have to share with the kind-hearted Druid who was destined to turn against his friends.
Mordred met Merlin's eyes and gave him a soft smile, his voice echoing in the warlock's head. "I'm happy for you, Emrys."
Merlin shook his head in response, sorrow filling his eyes as Mordred watched. "I wouldn't be."
And then Merlin went about doing his job.
After training, Gwaine moved to talk with Merlin, who gave an easy smile to the Knight.
But as Mordred watched the scene, the elder lost his joking demeanor and smile. He looked over at the King before he gave Merlin an understanding smile, patting his shoulder and saying something that Mordred couldn't hear.
Arthur noticed the scene and gave Mordred a knowing smile as he left.
Two weeks later, Mordred sat there watching as Arthur started courting Gwen, watched Merlin's happiness for them grew while he closed in on himself more than he had ever done before.
Gwaine's voice sounded from behind him one evening as a meeting came to a close. "It hurts to watch, doesn't it?"
Mordred met brown eyes and gave a shrug. "It hurts that he won't let anyone in to get help," he countered. "Knowing full well that it's all too much to bear on his own,"
Arthur overheard, but made no remark as he passed the two.
Merlin had disappeared long before then to run errands for Gauis.
Leon glanced at the two before he shook his head, turning and walking away.
All the Knights, by that point, knew what had happened. By extension, they knew that Merlin's happiness when they talked was slowly becoming more and more fake.
Heartbreak had a way of doing that to someone, and they all knew it. They just never expected to see it happen to the cheerful warlock.
No one said or did anything until Merlin's happiness had been completely sapped to the point that he didn't throw his normal insults at them at any given chance. He was losing his fire, and they hated it.
Arthur looked on with no small amount of guilt as his knights worried over his closest friend.
Mordred found himself unable to smile whenever Merlin was around. It was hard to be happy when someone so powerful was hurting because of another person. And slowly, all of the hero-worship he'd held for the man of legends as a child faded with the knowledge that he was still very much human, and still very easily hurt.
Gwaine decided to go talk to Arthur, leaving Mordred to his thoughts as he watched Merlin slowly sharpen a sword, his movements lethargic, as if he hadn't slept in a while.
And just like that, he decided he didn't care what Arthur would do. He moved to sit with Merlin and took the sword and sharpening stone from the servant, laying them aside and making Merlin look up at him. "He isn't worth this,"
Merlin held his gaze before he gave a weak smile, but it was honest and that's all Mordred could ever hope for. "I'm getting there, Mordred. I'm happy for him, honest,"
"I hate seeing you so upset, though," Mordred said, his voice even quieter than usual, echoing with pain.
Merlin hesitated before he shrugged. "I'll be fine,"
After that, Mordred noticed the warlock avoided him a lot of the time.
There were times where he'd play witness to Arthur and Merlin teasing one another, but he could see that Merlin was hurting after every banter. Whether because Arthur was still too close to him during them or because he was believing what was said was beyond anyone.
Percival frowned when he noticed that Merlin wasn't getting better. "I thought you said that Merlin told you he was getting better?" he asked of the Druid one evening as they were all sitting around at the tavern.
Mordred shrugged. "I guess it's harder on him than he thought," he offered, but he knew what it was. Arthur wasn't wanting to let Merlin forget and move on just yet.
This pattern continued for a while, Merlin slowly getting better and then Arthur going and destroying all the progress out of fear of being forgotten.
No one blamed the King for the fear, but then again, no one realized what it was doing to Merlin.
And so, when one evening on rounds, Mordred found Merlin sitting in a hidden alcove of the castle crying, he decided he'd had enough and stopped, kneeling down in front of the warlock. "Alright, I'm going to walk you to your chambers, and you're going to talk to me, Emrys," he said, his tone leaving no room for arguing.
And surprisingly, Merlin did talk to him. He opened up, sharing the fear that had begun to fill his heart. Sharing that he felt like everyone only pretended to care, that maybe, just maybe he deserved all the pain that he was putting himself though because he wasn't able to let go.
When they reached the door to Gauis' chambers, Mordred patted Merlin's shoulder. "Call for me if you need me, okay?" he said with a kind smile. "I'll be there, I promise. And no, it's no problem, before you say anything of the sort. I want to help you, Emrys. Let me, please,"
Merlin nodded, giving his own small smile in response before he retreated into the chambers for the night.
As Mordred lay awake that night, he couldn't help but feel as if he'd done a little bit to help.
A few weeks passed, and the Knights seemed surprised to see Merlin slowly becoming himself again, joking with everyone, even throwing light, playful insults at the King, who grinned at the action and allowed himself to slip into the banter while keeping a good distance.
Everyone was glad that Merlin was getting better. They'd missed the happiness that the young servant had always possessed.
And it didn't escape Gwaine's notice that the warlock had begun talking with Mordred more, being open rather than hesitant. He raised an eyebrow at this, but didn't complain. He was just glad his friend was feeling better now.
One training, Merlin had managed to trip while carrying the King's sword to him, startling several of the Knights.
"Merlin?" Mordred asked, worry leaking into his voice.
Merlin groaned, pushing himself up and handing Arthur his sword before backing away.
"Are you alright, Merlin?" Arthur asked, concerned despite himself.
"Yeah, fine,"
No one fought with him, allowing himself to go take a seat and watch while he scanned himself over as well as he could to see if he'd injured himself.
Once training ended, Mordred moved to his side and raised an eyebrow.
"I'll have a couple bruises," Merlin admitted easily, but shrugged. "I've had worse,"
No argument came from the Druid, but it didn't mean he was happy.
Another month had Merlin smiling constantly while him and Mordred got to know one another better.
Training usually consisted of them chatting during free time, and Arthur spoke with the others about it one evening.
"So, how long do you think it'll take before they stop dancing around each other?"
Elyan smiled at this. "I have to admit, I'm surprised you noticed,"
Arthur shrugged. "Hard not to see how close they are. Mordred's always been fond of Merlin,"
Gwaine didn't put in his opinion as he watched the two raven-haired males interact. "I'm just glad he makes Merlin happy, who cares the time it'll take as long as that continues?"
No one could argue this point.
What surprised everyone else is that during the middle of the summer months, Hunith appeared in Camelot.
Merlin caught sight of her as he sat to the side during training, watching calmly. He'd let his eyes wander as they all took a breath before a grin spread across his face and he moved to meet her in a tight hug.
Mordred raised an eyebrow at this. "Who is that?" he asked, slightly curious as to why Merlin was suddenly so excited.
No one answered as the two made their way over.
Arthur gave the woman a smile of greeting. "Hello, Hunith," he greeted kindly. "Is everything okay back in Ealdor?"
"Quite," Hunith said easily, giving the King a warm smile and a nod of greeting. "I just came to see Merlin, make sure he's been behaving, seeing as he's stopped writing and hasn't visited in years,"
"I am sorry for that, by the way," Merlin said, a bit of guilt leaking onto his face. "I was.."
Hunith nodded in response.
Mordred seemed lost, and it didn't escape anyone's notice.
"Ah, Mordred, this is Merlin's mother," Arthur said, acknowledging that the others knew the woman whereas Mordred did not.
Hunith's gaze turned to Mordred before she gave him a warm smile. "Merlin's told me about you, in his last letter," she said softly.
"Nothing bad, I hope," Mordred said, giving a shy smile.
Merlin grinned as he moved to stand with Mordred. "Of course not. Just the usual, you know, how wonderfully moronic you can be and how you've allowed the Knights to trick you into being a fool," he remarked with a teasing grin.
Hunith rolled her eyes at her son before she shook her head. "I suppose I'll see everyone later," she said, giving them a warning look that said not to argue. "But I should really go visit with Gauis, make sure my son hasn't made his life too difficult,"
And she was gone after pressing a kiss to her son's brow.
Merlin smiled after her.
Arthur shook his head. "I'll go inform Gwen that we'll be holding dinner tonight,"
And with that, everyone was dismissed.
"She seems wonderful," Mordred commented, falling into step with Merlin as he wandered aimlessly.
Merlin grinned at him. "She is." he admitted. "She's strong as hell, raised me alone,"
Mordred didn't ask, and a comfortable silence fell between them.
Hunith stayed only for a week before leaving back for Ealdor.
Mordred had to admit, he'd never met anyone more interesting than her.
Merlin seemed sad to see her go, but it was understandable.
"So," Arthur said as he came up behind Mordred one evening while Merlin was off doing a chore.
Mordred frowned at him but nodded in acknowledgement.
Arthur grinned at the Druid. "You like him, don't you?"
"My lord?" Mordred asked warily.
Arthur smiled as he watched a couple of young kids darting around, their parents standing around chatting before he answered. "Merlin. You like him, don't you?"
"I fail to see how anyone couldn't,"
That was all the answer Arthur needed, it seemed, because he nodded and spoke once more before he left. "You should talk to him, Mordred."
Once the King was gone, Mordred frowned, speaking to Merlin through his mind. "Emrys?"
It took a moment, but Merlin responded in kind not long after. "I heard. I'm afraid his royal prattishness isn't as quiet as he seems to think he is,"
Mordred groaned, but didn't answer.
It was another week before they really acknowledged what had happened. Even then, it was Merlin who addressed it, using their mental link to communicate with the Druid knight.
"What are we, Mordred?"
If Arthur noticed Mordred's attention shifting to the servant standing behind him, he said nothing. Mordred met Merlin's eyes before he responded. "I do not know," he responded, biting the inside of his lip. "What do you wish us to be?"
Merlin looked down as he responded. "I like to think of us as friends, but.."
Nothing more was said as Arthur ended the meeting.
Arthur gave Mordred a look as the young knight stood.
Yeah, he knows I wasn't paying attention, Mordred thought with a sigh.
Then he looked at Merlin, who was watching him uncertainly.
He smiled kindly as he spoke through their link. "I'd like to be more as well,"
And Merlin's entire face lit up with the grin that he gave.
Mordred gave a smile of his own before leaving.
Arthur shook his head from where he'd finished gathering the papers in front of him. "So, you two...you seem close. Is there anything there?"
Merlin looked over at Arthur before he gave a shrug. "Perhaps,"
It took Merlin a good few days before he could bring himself to act on instinct.
After he'd finally given in, though, it didn't take long for word to spread through the Knights that the two sorcerers were involved with one another.
None of them seemed upset by this.
Arthur shook his head as he watched the two interact, sharing momentary touches to show their affection. It was so simple, the exact opposite of how it had been between Merlin and him.
Gwaine noticed the King watching them interact several times before he spoke. "It's nice to see, isn't it?"
"I'm glad they're happy," Arthur commented before going back to his own work.
As time passed, everyone watched the two grow closer. There were arguments and days where one or both of them seemed hurt, but it never lasted long.
On their first year anniversary, Mordred caught Merlin before the morning training session and pulled him into a hidden alcove in the castle, effectively startling the warlock.
"Mordred, what...?" Merlin started, but got cut off.
Mordred pulled Merlin into a short kiss, smiling when Merlin pulled back in shock. "Happy anniversary, Emrys,"
Merlin smiled faintly at him. "Happy anniversary," he bid. "But if you expect me to live through it, you have training to get to, and I have armor to polish and a sword to sharpen,"
Everyone pretended not to notice the happiness in Mordred's eyes through training and the slightly dazed surprise that Merlin held when he joined them outside to do his chores.
It surprised no one when several months later, Mordred had officially begun 'courting' Merlin, allowing them all to know just how serious the druid was about the relationship.
But war brought back the happiness quite a bit.
Merlin found himself unsurprised when the war ended, Mordred staying by his side all the while, even when Arthur found out about his magic.
And it was needless to say that Arthur wasn't happy about it.
He did nothing about it, but his words made Merlin almost wish he'd been killed.
The Knights pretended not to see Mordred comfort Merlin, because Arthur had ordered them to keep them apart until things settled.
Gwaine was pissed at the King for it.
Once he was sure Merlin was in good hands, Gwaine left to find the King. And when he found him and Gwen having dinner in their chambers, he stormed in, slamming the door behind him and snapping, letting his anger out.
"How dare you? How could you even dare think Merlin betrayed you? He stayed by your side when you least deserved it, tortured himself over the opinion of a man like you, all the while giving his entire life to you," Gwaine growled, glaring at Arthur. "He's your best friend, and yet you're content to destroy him with your words and hatred, keeping the one person who's never forsaken him away from him,"
Arthur at least had the decency to look down in shame as Gwaine went off.
Gwen watched with a dangerous scowl on her face.
Once Gwaine finished, she turned to him. "Where's Merlin now?"
Gwaine met her gaze. "Him and Mordred are with Percival, my lady,"
Gwen nodded. "Get back to them. I'll handle my husband,"
No argument came.
A week later, Arthur apologized and frowned when he saw his servant and best friend curled up in Mordred's arms, looking like his entire world had ended.
He'd caused that look. He'd caused pain to the warlock, again. And it became clear what Mordred thought of him the second he was in sight, because the concern was overrode with pure anger.
But he never let go of Merlin.
"Merlin?"
The warlock flinched, but met Arthur's eyes.
"I'm sorry. You didn't deserve this."
Merlin shrugged.
It took time, but they mended their friendship, and things settled.
And when Merlin came into the chambers he'd come to share with Mordred, he was finally smiling again.
The Druid smiled, placing the book he was thumbing through aside and moving to wrap his arms around Merlin's still too-slim waist, pulling him into a warm kiss.
Merlin returned it for a brief moment before pulling away with a smile. "I love you,"
Mordred grinned at the warlock. "And I you," he offered before he bit his lip, backing away.
This action made Merlin's smile disappear. "Mordred?" he asked, noting the worry on his boyfriend's face.
Mordred met his gaze before he smiled, backing to his desk to grab something before he turned back to Merlin. "Hold your hand out,"
Merlin hesitated, but did as he was asked.
With that action, Mordred moved forward, pressing something into Merlin's palm before releasing.
When Merlin glanced at it, he recognized the necklace that Mordred had worn since their first meeting. He looked up to Mordred in question, not entirely sure what was happening.
Mordred smiled easily. "I want...I want you to have it," he said, hesitating before he spoke. "Just as I want for you to marry me,"
Merlin smiled faintly, understanding easier than Mordred had thought he would. He nodded in acceptance, untying the twine before tying it around his neck and taking the steps forward to wrap Mordred in his arms. "I could wish for nothing more,"
Mordred grinned.
No one said anything about the smiles the following morning. That is, until Gwen joined them all out in the courtyard and noticed the necklace laying atop Merlin's neckerchief. "What's this?" she asked, picking the charm up to examine before her eyes brightened. "Wait.."
Merlin gave an almost embarrassed smile and nod and Gwen pulled her friend into a tight hug. "I'm so happy for you,"
The others noticed, but hesitated.
Eventually, Leon looked over to Mordred. "Any idea what's got Gwen so excited?" he questioned of the younger male.
Mordred gave a sage smile, watching as Merlin held the charm in his hand, meeting his eyes. "She...found out that I'd asked Merlin to marry me,"
"You did?" Gwaine asked, grinning at him. "I say this calls for some celebration,"
No one argued against this, and Mordred found his eyes back on Merlin with a smile. "I love you,"
Merlin smiled easily, and though it wasn't said, Mordred understood that the sentiment was returned whole-heartedly.
So...I didn't really plan this out. I just...wrote.
Meaning, sorry if it was terrible.
I might add more little chapters, stuff like the wedding, etc. if people are interested.
-Sky
