A/N: Hi :) Second draft of this, I hope it had improved a bit ;)
He watched her in silence, as he had done with months. It was a cruel fate to die. Even crueller to be caught in limbo as he had been; forced to watch those in the light enjoy their lives, while he was left to reflect on where it had all went wrong. When had his heart fallen captive to the darkness? When had he been left empty? Regardless, he had found one highlight to his situation; he was able to watch over her. There was much he still wanted to tell her. Things he no longer had the chance to say. It made him sad. It hurt him to see her hurting.
He wanted to hold her and comfort her. He could still see the smile she'd had the first time they had spent the night together. Just because she had been a prisoner, had not meant she'd been off limits. He had not intended the relationship to become something serious, but he hadn't complained when it had. She'd been the only one to make him feel anything. She still did. Guilt tormented him for being the one responsible for her pain. If he could, he would have gladly gone to comfort her and take the source of her pain away, but he couldn't. All he could do was watch.
I wanted you to know, I love the way you laugh,
I want to hold you high and steal your pain away.
I keep your photograph, and I know it serves me well.
I want to hold you high and steal your pain away.
He wanted to take her pain away, not only for her sake, but for his also. Axel had never given much thought to the pain a heart could be capable of causing and feeling…whether he had one or not was debatable, but he felt a pain he had not felt through all his years in the Organization.
He was alone, no one to pass the time with and forced to watch the trials and tribulations of his girlfriend and her companions. He hurt deep down; somewhere he had not felt pain before. He felt broken without her in his arms.
Coz I'm broken when I'm lonesome,
And I don't feel right when you're gone away.
He reached out to touch her pale cheek as unshed tears made her eyes glassy. He knew she would never feel it. She was gone from him and there was nothing he could do about it. He blamed Xemnas…he blamed the Organization. He blamed his own heart for caving to the darkness and leading him to the World That Never Was. If he had not joined the Organization, he wouldn't have met her. He could have saved them both this pain.
You've gone away, you don't feel me anymore.
Who would have thought a nobody could feel empty? They had no hearts, they were empty in the literal term, but she felt the emptiness, its cold tough and distancing barriers. She'd felt this way for several months now. The Organization had fallen, but it had brought the only person who had cared about her with it.
Anyone watching from the side of Light had seen a young girl; kept against her will for the sake of her powers. They had been right to begin with. She had been a prisoner at first, but he had paid attention to her. He had treated her as his equal. He had made her laugh and smile. Now he was gone. He had tried to help the right side and death was his reward. It wasn't fair.
It puzzled her how a person like him - sure of himself and life - was a nobody to begin with. He had always been laughing and smirking when they had been together. Only one member of the Organization had known about her and Axel's relationship. He had been a good friend and he still was. But it wasn't the same anymore. Roxas tried, but he couldn't cheer her up. The only person who had meant anything to her was gone. He had died helping Roxas' other.
Naminé blinked back tears as she thought over everything she now knew. All of it happened so fast in the end. She hadn't gotten to say goodbye. She had been too busy helping Kairi when he'd fought alongside Sora. She missed him. She missed her boyfriend.
There was still so much she still wanted to tell him; let him know she loved him too. That had been the last thing he'd said to her and she had been too surprised to reply before he'd walked into the portal with a trademark smug smirk on his face.
The worst is over now, and we can breathe again.
I want to hold you high and steal your pain away.
She had a life now, but it seemed much harder than her existence as a nobody. She hadn't had to hide her emotions or worry about what anyone thought of her when she'd been with Axel. He would listen to her not matter the situation. He was the only person she could take for face value; everyone else seemed to have his or her own agenda.
Look at her now…the fighting and struggling was over, but there was much more that had to be dealt with. Naminé kept up her happy façade while in the company of others, but when the doors closed she fell to pieces. She was angry. But there was no one she could blame. She wanted to be with him, she didn't care anymore.
There's so much left to learn, and no one left to fight,
I want to hold you high and steal your pain.
"I can't play this game anymore, I'm not strong enough, I'm sorry, Axel."
Naminé allowed the tears to race down her cheeks and soak into the pillow she hugged to her chest; sobs wracked her frame. She wanted to be with him. That's all she wanted from life now, to end it. She saw no reason to try anymore. The only person who had meant anything to her was gone and she wanted to be with him. She didn't have the will or strength to deal with the turmoil in her heart any longer.
Coz I'm broken when I'm open,
And I don't feel like I'm strong enough.
Axel allowed a tear to slide down his cheek as he watched on. It wasn't fair that she should suffer and hurt because of his bone-headed actions and decisions.
It was a simple decision. But why the second thoughts? All she had to do was swallow a few small white pills and go asleep. But she found herself staring at the bottle…was she scared? Why was she scared? It was this existence without him that hurt her. If she did this, then she would be reunited with him. She wouldn't hurt anymore. She continued to stare at the small container; was she too cowardly to do what she knew she had to? The irony of her reality was laughable; the thing she had sought after - a heart - was now the thing holding her back from its desire, Axel.
Coz I'm broken when I'm lonesome,
And I don't feel right when you're gone away.
"I never wanted it to come to this. You shouldn't have to suffer because of my stupid decision…"
It didn't matter what he said or what anyone said. Not now. She had proved to herself that she wasn't a coward. But the saddest part was that he was glad she had done it. Axel watched with heavy guilt. He didn't want her to suffer anymore and he wanted to be with her. He didn't care how selfish that sounded.
I'm sorry was the only thought in Naminé's mind as she lay on her bed, drowsiness creeping up on her. She knew it would be one of her friends to find her in the morning. For that, she was truly sorry. But she knew they had stronger hearts than her. The would be able to deal with it better than she could. Her love had died and along with him, so had her desire for life.
Her friends would have each other. What about Roxas? That would be two of his friends gone…he would be okay. His heart was strong and he had his friends to help him. With that last thought, more of a comfort to herself than anything else she put her thoughts to the back of her head as a familiar face came into view. He smiled in spite of himself, he was the last person who had wanted her to crumble, but now they could be together.
"I'm here Naminé…"
A small smile lit up her face as she closed her eyes, oblivious to her room door opening and Roxas' stunned face and desperate shouts.
You've gone away,
You don't feel me anymore.
A/N: Thanks for reading :)