[A/N]: I've hit a sort of block with my other fic, Warrior's Spirit and after having a brainwave I've decided to get this baby written…and maybe alleviate some of my writer's block…I HAVE NOT GIVEN UP!!!
DISCLAIMER: I own nothing and do not wish to make the mistake of moving in on J.K. Rowling's territory as creator of Harry Potter's wonderful universe. I am making no money and suing would be a waste of time as I am currently penniless. 'Dead leaves and the dirty ground' is a song by the White Stripes and is owned by them.
SUMMARY: After graduation, a final fight that ends his relationship and the death of Voldemort, Harry leaves the wizarding world behind. Pregnant. Eleven years later, two young Potters return to Hogwarts for their education; under the expertise of Potions Master and unbeknownst to him, father, Severus Snape.
WARNING: This is slash (HP/SS) and M-Preg. If you have a problem, do not go any further, shield your eyes and click the back button. It's not graphic so don't go freaking out and going on about immorality…DEAL WITH IT!
MONKSWOOD, WOLFSBANE, and an INFUSION OF WORMWOOD
------------CHAPTER 1 & PROLOGUE: Dead Leaves on the Dirty Ground--------------
"WHY? TELL ME RIGHT NOW, SEVERUS! ONE GOOD REASON!" Harry looked pleadingly at his professor of seven years, friend of three, and lover of nearly one.
"ONE?! DO YOU ONLY NEED ONE? THERE ARE AT LEAST A DOZEN!" Severus Snape was by no means an easy man to get close, to never mind have a meaningful relationship with. But somehow, through the harsh battles, injuries, and losses did they become closer. It was a mutual understanding, to respect, to like, then, finally, to love. Now, however, things were much more complicated than that decision on Harry's seventeenth birthday at Hogwarts during the summer.
"YES! ONE, JUST ONE THAT IS ABOUT US! THE TWO OF US! NOT VOLDEMORT, NOT HOGWARTS, HELL! NOT EVEN SIRIUS! ONE ABOUT US AND OUR RELATIONSHIP!" Unshed tears glistened in the intense emerald orbs that were Harry's eyes. Such was the intensity that Severus lowered his eyes. Whether in hurt or shame, even both was unclear even to himself. It was hard, he realized, how difficult ending this would have to be. Difficult, but not impossible for Severus.
"HARRY, YOU GRADUATE TOMMOROW! YOU CANNOT HIDE BEHIND HOGWARTS OR DUMBLEDORE! THERE WILL BE NO MORE HIDING FOR US! MY SPYING, YOU BEING YOU, IT WON'T WORK! IT CAN'T!" Severus knew he was being harsh, maybe too harsh, but it was necessary. Not only for the named or shouted reasons but, as unwilling as Severus was to admit it, he was scared. Scared of what would happen to Harry, the one person he loved above all others, even himself. He loved Harry enough to let him go, to unburden him from his 37-year old self.
"Severus," Harry's voice had lowered considerably, he had no need to yell over the breaking of glass that had just stopped, "That's a stupid reason and you know it" In all actuality, Harry reasoned, it was a good one. There were no more late-night rendez-vous under the invisibility cloak, no meaningless detentions, but it wasn't the answer he wanted. "I want to know about us! I know all those reasons, but there are none, admit it, that stops us, we both need each other, you and I know it"
Damn it Harry, Severus swore to himself, You're making this so much harder on yourself, on me.
"Listen, Potter" Severus praised himself on his acting ability and fought with himself to keep a blank face as Harry's heart visible wrench at the name that hadn't been used in private for nearly five years, "It's over, done. Go, join the aurors and fight Voldemort, its what you do best" Harry's hand, in some unknown gesture, flew to his stomach. With a speed and grace that Harry always possessed on a broom, he flew to the side door, the washroom. As Harry emptied his stomach and gave heart twisting sobs, it took all Severus' hard-earned self-control not to run and comfort him, and instead he turned and walked out the door.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Harry delivered the graduating address the next day. The speech was amazing, prepared a month in advance when he discovered it would be him speaking on behalf of the student body. As he read; his thoughts drifted to the nights he had spent with Sev reading and writing, just to get it right. Severus was an eloquent man, with an astonishing ability to express so much emotion with so little words. Not many aside from Harry and Dumbledore, however, took the time to truly know him and see this. His thoughts then shifted to this mornings visit to Madame Pomfrey.
Maybe it was that he had spent so many of his years in the hospital wing, or that the matron of the hospital wing had saved his life so many times that he decided to go. But the constant throwing up and changes in appetite had also played a large role.
"Oh dear," she had bustled over to him, "What is it now? Are you nervous dear?" Over the years, Poppy had grown accustomed to seeing the young man in the Wing and had taken to acting like an over-grown hen, much akin to Mrs. Weasley.
"I'm fine Poppy," formalities were forgotten long ago, during sixth year after a battle in which dozens had lost their lives, "I've just been feeling off lately, I'm not sure if its nerves or something else but I've been getting sick a lot recently and my appetites growing if you can believe it" His statement was met with a thoughtful look from the healer.
"Let me run some tests, dear, and we'll find out as much as we can in a moment" A few tests later, the results came back. Positive. He was pregnant.
'Pregnant' he murmured to himself as he prepared himself silently for the task he was about to undertake. Apparently only soul mates and powerful wizards could conceive together without the aid of potions and spells. After swearing Poppy to secrecy that she would never tell, unless to the headmaster, but only after it was done. When she asked what 'it' was, he merely said she would know when the time came.
And now, here he was. He stared at the scene before him. A green hilly area in the northern part of Scotland, just him and Voldemort as a full-scale battle played itself around them, the setting sun caused the blood-stained ground to glow and glisten. He barely held back tears as he saw Ron fall from the corner of his eye, and heard Hermione's tearful sobs as she mourned for her fiancé. Circling each other, like predatory tigers, their wands raised, Voldemort fired the first curse. Harry ducked and hurled one of his own back. The battle progresses slowly, curses thrown back and forth until Harry's shield broke as his stomach gave an ache. The baby. Voldemort took his chance and fired the killing curse. Harry watched stupid horror as the green light sped towards him. His thoughts only on his unborn babe. As it inched closer, barely a foot away, a golden light enveloped Harry's hands. As the golden light gradually subsided, there, in his hands, was the Gryffindor sword. Holding the blade in front of him on instinct, he looked on in horror and awe as the light of Avada Kedavra melted itself in the metal of the engraved sword and returned, doubled in size and power; shimmering with gold, and struck Voldemort down. For the first time, he was aware that the battle had stopped and the remaining Death Eaters had disapparated away. Harry, covered in sweat and drenched in blood, looked down at the still-glowing sword in his hand and thrust it into the ground. Placing a hand on his stomach, his son or daughter, his family, he took in the scene and disapparated too.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Harry lived alone, in the rural areas of Ireland during his pregnancy, in the muggle world. It was by no means normal for a man to be pregnant so he relied on Sirius and his own garden for his food and supplies. Sirius was the only thing or person he hadn't separated himself from. Padfoot lost so much during the war, including Remus. He also needed the companionship. Poppy came by often for check-ups and Harry didn't know what he would do without either of them. So on a very wet March 3rd, in the late night, Harry gave birth to two healthy babies, and Poppy and Sirius were god-mother and god-father respectively. One boy, Asphodel Jamison Potter and one girl, Aconite Liliane Potter. And that night Severus, who after Harry's disappearance and the pain of leaving him had left him more aloof than before, had an amazing sensation of warmth and love explode from the pit of his stomach.
----------------END CHAPTER 1 AND PROLOGUE---------------
Like? I've only started reading slash but this came into my head and I had to write it…please tell me what you think…sorry but it won't get graphic.
PLEASE REVIEW….CONSTRUCTIVE CRITIZIM BUT NO FLAMES…I CAN'T HANDLE THE PSYCHOLOGICAL TRAUMA…
*Next Chapter: older Asphodel and Aconite…plus…Hogwarts!!!*