Chapter 1: Don't Wait
The sky glows
I see it shining when my eyes close
I hear your warnings but we both know
I'm gonna look at it again
"P. Sawyer, what are you waiting for? We are going to be late picking up Jaime." Brooke stared at Peyton who was having trouble getting going this particular morning.
"Brooke, what if Lucas is there?"
"Oh honey, I thought you said you were over him. He's with Lindsay now."
"I know, but he kissed me. Or I kissed him…but if I kissed him he definitely kissed me back. It still exists."
"What still exists?"
"Everything. Walking into that kiss was like coming home for all the right reasons. It was safe, it was secure…it was like I never left." Tears started to well in her eyes, but she hastily brushed them away and feigned a faint smile. "I'll be okay. I don't really have a choice do I?" Brooke shook her head sympathetically.
"I don't know what to say," taking Peyton's hands in her own she held them to her heart, "If you can feel safe and secure, don't let it go. I really like Lindsay. I think she is a great person…"
"Brooke," Peyton interjected.
"No, wait, let me finish. She's a great person and I really want both her and Luke to be happy, but we all know that she's not you. And if you really want him, then you need to fight. Don't wait for him to make a move, you need to do it first."
"How can I? After we kissed and I thought I finally stood a chance, he freaking went and proposed to her! I love him, but I hate him so much for doing this too me." She didn't stop the tears this time. She closed her eyes and let them fall.
"Peyton, I can go get Jaime by myself if you want to stay here…"
"No, I need to get out of here."
When they arrived at Haley and Nathan's house, they both noticed Lucas' car instantly.
"Shit," Peyton breathed quietly. Brooke took her hand.
"Hey, It's going to be okay," Brooked tried to reassure her friend to no avail. "You can do this. Just take it slow." Peyton nodded.
"Okay, let's do this. Besides we are here because of Jaime, not Luke."
"Exactly!" Brooke laughed. The two of them walked into Haley and Nathan's calling out for Jaime. He came bounding down the stairs.
"Aunt Brooke and Aunt Peyton!! Are you here for me??" He squealed in delight.
"Yes we are little man. Today we are have an adventure, what do you say to that?" Brooke grinned at him.
"Yesssss! But only if I can wear my cape and only if Uncle Luke can come too."
"Oh well honey, I don't know if that's such…."
"No, hey it's fine," Peyton, said, and then turning to Brooke, "Really it'll be fine." Brooke shrugged. Then covering Jaime's ears yelled,
"Lucas Scott get your ass down here!" Uncovering Jaime's ears she asked him if he had heard any of that. Jaime shook his head. Brooke smiled, "Good, now go get that cape on." Jaime disappeared upstairs just as Lucas entered the room. "Hey Luke, do you want to join us on an adventure?"
"I really need to work on my book," he answered.
"Okay, that's fine. Jaime just really wanted you to come is all."
"Just Jaime?" Lucas asked staring at Peyton. What the hell did he want her to say? What the hell is his problem anyway? Frowning, she answered,
"And Brooke of course."
"And Peyton also," Brooked interjected nudging Peyton in the ribs.
"Yeah sure, why not. So what is this adventure anyway?"
"Hey, yeah, Brooke what is this adventure?" Peyton asked curiously. Brooke smiled mischievously and ran up the stair to get Jaime.
"Brooke!" Peyton and Lucas both yelled simultaneously.
"Oh please, you guys. We are just going for a walk. Not everything is a secret ploy to get you two back together you know," Brooke yelled from upstairs.
"Well this isn't going to be awkward," Luke said shifting his weight.
"Fuck you Luke," Peyton said turning on her heel. "Tell Brooke I'll be in the car." Running his hands through his hair he knew this would be a very long day. Brooke and Jaime bounded down the stairs.
"Hey, where's Peyton?"
"She's in the car. Hey Brooke I don't think it's such a good idea for me…"
"Hey this isn't about you. This," covering Jaime's ears, "is about Jaime. Not everything is about your love life." Uncovering Jaime's ears, "Did you hear that?" Jaime shook his head. "Good boy! Okay, let's get going!" After they all buckled in, Brooke started the car. They drove in silence for a while. Peyton put on some music when all of a sudden the car stopped. "Crap, we are out of gas. How'd I let that happen?"
"No biggie, there's a gas station like ten minutes down the road. I'll run over and get some." Lucas said.
"Great!" She winked at Jaime and nodded her head. A few minutes later Brooked looked in the back and noticed that Lucas had left his wallet. "Peyton, Lucas left his wallet. You better go give it to him or he won't be able to get any gas."
"What? Why me? No way, you do it."
"I can't…. it's my car. Besides I'm wearing heels," she replied holding the wallet out to Peyton.
"Fine," Peyton grumbled getting out of the car. Brooke looked back at Jaime.
"You were pretty sneaky little man. Lucas didn't even know you took his wallet. Now as a responsible adult I have to say that this was very wrong and we shouldn't do things like this."
"Yes, Aunt Brooke." Jaime replied grinning from ear to ear.
"Hey, Luke!" Peyton gasped running out of breath. Lucas turned around to see Peyton running towards him. "You forgot your wallet." She stopped, catching her breath. Lucas felt his pockets.
"Wow, I don't even know how that happened."
"Yeah, okay. I'm going to head back to the car," she said turning back.
"Peyton, why don't you just come with me to the gas station?" He saw Peyton stop.
"I don't think that's a good idea," she said as she continued back to the car. Luke ran his hand through his hair again.
"Peyton, I'm sorry." He saw Peyton stop again. This time sat on the side of the road, and put her head into her hands. He walked over to her. "Peyt…" Peyton put up a hand to stop him.
"Stay away," she whispered. Lucas cringed at the thought of hurting her. He kneeled next to her.
"I am so sorry. I don't know what else you want me to say," he pleaded. Fury ignited within her stomach. Standing up, she looked down at Lucas kneeling on the ground.
"You don't know what else I want you to say?! How about, I'm sorry for being such a fuck-up! I'm sorry for ripping your heart out and I'm sorry for deciding to marry someone else even though we don't belong together! Lucas I was there, I know what you felt and I know what I felt when we kissed."
"You don't know what I felt."
"Yes I do! You felt confliction. You remembered your regrets, and my mistakes. You felt fire and confusion. You felt pain, but most of all your felt me, needing you, needing every ounce of you." Luke stood so that he was facing Peyton.
"You are wrong. I didn't feel that." Lucas responded very quietly.
"Yes you did! Why are you so afraid to admit what you feel?!"
"Peyton, don't"
"No Luke, why are you afraid to admit that you still love me as much as I love you? Why can't you just admit that you still need me just as much as I need you?!"
"Because you'll fucking leave me again!" Luke shouted at her. Peyton blanched at his response.
"Luke…"
"You broke my heard Peyton. How am I supposed to trust you?"
"I never left you Luke! I just wasn't ready! I'm ready now!"
"It's too late," he said looking at her sadly.
"Not it's not," she replied pulling him into a deep kiss.
"Yes, Peyton it is," he breathed pushing her away.
Don't wait, Don't wait
The road is now a sudden sea
And suddenly, you're deep enough
To lay your armor down
"Luke, you need to forgive me. Please forgive me! I'm ready now. I'm standing here completely naked exposing my entire soul to you. Why can't you forgive me?!" Lucas had a pained expression on his face. "We have shared so much. We've shared so much more than you will ever share with anyone else." She looked at Luke awaiting a response. Not getting one, she continued on, "Do you want to know what I really felt when we kissed?" Lucas looked up at her. "I felt unbelievably sad, because I had waited too long and I had lost you. You were my best friend Luke. Turning your proposal down was the hardest thing I ever did. But somehow I thought you would understand. But I get it now and I'm so sorry. I'm sorry that you can't forgive me, but I can't force you to come back to me. I can't keep being rejected by the man I love. People make mistakes Luke. I know you feel like I rejected you, but I just wasn't ready. I made such a mess, I know, but why can't you forgive me?" Peyton's tears caused her to stop talking. Lucas tentatively stepped closer to her and wiped them away.
"You are so much of who I am, but I don't regret moving on." Peyton nodded silently turning in the opposite direction. Finally reaching the car, a concerned Brooke hopped out to console Peyton.
"What happened honey?" Brooked asked obviously concerned.
"I waited too long."
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P.S. I promise it'll get better with Luke and Peyton ;)