Doctor Love!
Pavla, Andelko, and Novak are not my original characters- they belong to the awesome Raivas-Latvijas! :)
Pairings (in alphabetical order…because I don't buy into this whole seme/uke thing): CroatiaXSerbia, ItalyXSlovenia, AzerbaijanXTurkey, ArmeniaXFinland, past FinlandXRussia, EstoniaXHungary, Georgia (the country)XSpain, IrelandXFem!Scotland (non-related),and past AustriaXHungary. :) Also, there is some onesided FinlandXSweden, where Sweden likes Finland a little too much. The main pairings are ArmeniaXFinland, EstoniaXHungary, and ItalyXSlovenia. This whole story is written to be a little ridiculous, so don't take it too seriously. ;)
If that was too long to read: Near Eastern countries (plus Turkey), Celtic nations, and Northeastern Europe! ;)
Rating: T should more than cover it.
Category: Romance, Friendship, Humor (lots of my bizarre humor!), and a little bit of Hurt/Comfort. Oh, and the title comes from the KISS song, "Doctor Love." ;D
…
"They call him Doctor Love! Doctor Love!" Doctor Hedervary grinned, poking Alexianos in the side. He blushed.
"I should hope they don't." He smiled hesitantly, poking her back.
"You've never heard that song?"
"Hm?"
"Never mind. Anyway, you're going to be performing facial reconstructive surgery and a septoplasty on someone."
Alex sucked the air in through his teeth. The ordeal that the patient had gone through to mess up his or her visage like that must have been brutal. "What's the situation?"
"Let me get his profile." She opened a manila folder, scanning her notes. "Ah, here we go! Tino Väinämöinen, a twenty-nine-year-old history teacher at North Hollywood High School."
"You're kidding- I went there. Maybe he was a classmate of mine?"
"Maybe. Though it says here that he immigrated from Helsinki less than a year ago."
"How did he get hurt?"
"He climbed up a ladder to get his neighbor's cat out of a tree- cliché, I know, but cute- and the bottom slipped."
"Ouch. He's lucky he didn't break his spine."
"Doesn't he know it."
"Okay, so I need to check up on him? Brief him about the surgery? I'm assuming I'll be conducting it today."
"Indeed. Just go talk to him- he doesn't have a girlfriend in the room or anything, and he's probably a little lonely. And," she lowered her voice, "I'm pretty sure he's gay. He checked neither Pavla nor me out. Even gay men check out Pavla!"
The Armenian doctor laughed. "Well, I would never check Pavla out in front of you, dear."
Elizaveta chuckled. "That's pretty evident, Alex."
"You wound me so. What room is the patient in? And how should I address him?"
"He's very friendly- I'm sure just calling him 'Tino' will be fine. That's what he told me to do."
"Okay. Thanks, Eli."
"Anytime!" The Hungarian woman turned toward the left wing of the hallway, smiling as she turned away from her companion and thinking some rather indecent things about the incidence that he and the patient should ever get together…
…
"Good afternoon, Tino," Alexianos greeted his patient amicably. "How are you feeling?"
"I've had better days," he answered honestly, with a slight smile. The patient had a youthful face, even though it was marred by injury. Alex immediately felt comforted by his patient's presence- a good thing, taking into account that he would need steady nerves to operate.
"I'm sorry about this- but hopefully, I can make it better. I'm Doctor Kirzigian, and I'll be performing your facial reconstructive surgery and septoplasty. Do you have any questions for me about it?"
Tino thought for a moment. "I have a question, but not about the surgery."
"Go for it."
"How much do you like history?"
The tan doctor grinned in amusement. "I love it. How come?"
"You see, I'm a history teacher, and I wrote my thesis in graduate school on Armenian-Ottoman history."
"You don't say?"
"Yeah, and- please excuse my assumption- guessing that you're Armenian, would you want to tell me some of your views on your nation's history? I completely understand if you're too busy, but I'm just fascinated by it."
Alexianos smiled. "My schedule is actually pretty sporadic- since I perform surgeries, I get a lot of down-time in between. I'd love to come in and chat with you. And you guessed right- I am Armenian."
Tino grinned, his pale face taking on an innocent, almost cherubic expression. "Great! I really appreciate it."
"Don't mention it. Anyway, if you're ready, I can perform your surgery right now. It will take me about three hours to complete it. Do you have any allergies, Tino?"
"Nope. And I'm ready."
"Okay. Let me just find a nurse to accompany me."
He nodded, and Alex exited the room, finding Pavla almost instantly.
"Hey, did you talk to the patient yet?" She scratched the back of her head, shaking her dark hair out of her bun.
"Yeah- I'm going to be operating on him right now, actually. Can you accompany me for the surgery?"
"Yep! Eli already asked me to, anyway."
"Great. Um…do you think he's gay?"
"Did Eli tell you that, too? She thinks every male patient that comes in here is. Why?"
Alexianos felt his face heat with embarrassment. Why did he ask that? "No reason- I was just curious."
"Mm-hm. Sure, Alexianos. You know, Eli does have a good eye for matchmaking. After all, she's half the reason that Novak and Andelko got together."
"And the other half is that the two of them made out after getting drunk at the Christmas party?"
Pavla shrugged. "Eli did bring the Absolut…But you're evading the topic. You know, it's not that uncommon for doctors to develop crushes on their patients. Just don't be the first to act on the feeling."
Alexianos chuckled. "Eww…besides, I know next to nothing about him. I am going to visit him later to chat, though."
She raised an eyebrow.
"Not like that. He's a history teacher, and he wrote his thesis on Armenian-Ottoman events."
"So he wants to explore you."
"Well, not me, but my heritage-land's history…oh, wait. You're a pervert."
She laughed. "And you didn't already know this?"
…
Three hours and twenty-two minutes later, Pavla and Alexianos woke Tino from his surgery. A bit dazed, he grinned lazily.
"Heeeey, Doctor!" He laughed to himself. He'd seemingly reacted negatively to the anesthesia. "C-can I call you Doctor Love, or would that be weird?"
"I'd…prefer you call me Doctor Kirzigian, Tino. But if that's too hard, you can call me Alex."
"So call you- Doctor Love! They call you Doctor Love! Doctor Love!..."
Pavla began laughing so hard that she had to lean on a chair for support as she doubled over. Alexianos wanted to bury his face in his hands.
"So if you'll please get on your knees!...something something something BILLS OR FEES!"
Alexianos had to cover his mouth with his sleeve- the whole situation was just too embarrassing.
"I'm going to pee myself!" Pavla exclaimed before running out of the room in hysterics.
"Hey, hey Doctor," Tino pulled on Alex's sleeve, "Do you have the cure I'm thinkin' of?"
Alex flushed. "Hurrah! Look- you are already cured. Now, I believe you've had a strange reaction to the anesthesia- I need to monitor you until you come to."
He snickered and nodded. The poor guy- in a few minutes, he'd be mortified.
"I'm super tired, though."
"I know it's hard, but please try to stay awake."
"Okay. Can I talk to you?"
"Of course you can. What would you like to talk about?"
"…Somalia."
"You like Somalia?"
"Only in Somalia…we've got pirates. Broop…broop…broop…broop-de-doop."*
"What else do you know about Somalia?"
Tino laughed, ignoring Alexianos' question completely. "I know that there's a population of crab in Norway.* I have a friend from Norway. He dated this guy named Mathias. Mathias was so-o-o-o-o hot. I had a serious crush on him my freshman year in college."
So he was gay!, Alex mused, embarrassed for his excitement over that fact. "Ah, I see."
"He's just a friend now. He's an awesome guy, but very impulsive. But he has this really cool blond hair that's always messy but still looks good and oh my God." He glanced at Alexianos with more clarity, a mortified expression on his face. "Is my surgery over?"
"Yes, it is."
"Oh…perkele, I am so sorry! I had no idea I'd react that badly to anesthesia and…" He blushed, "Please forgive me."
"It's not a problem, Tino. If it makes you feel any better about your telling me about your friend, I'm into men, as well."
The Finn breathed a sigh of relief. "That does make me feel better."
"I'm glad. Is there anything I can get you? You're probably thirsty. It's okay for you to drink, but you'll want to wait a while before you chew hard food."
"Could I have some milk?"*
"Of course. I'll bring you some right now. In the meantime, try to relax without falling asleep. Watching TV helps, but try to watch something fast-paced. Why they play the mid-day news in these rooms is beyond me."
The blond laughed. "Sure thing."
Alex closed the door behind himself, almost instantly running into a smirking Elizaveta. "Did I not tell you?"
"I'd rather forget about what just transpired."
"Pavla was running to the restroom like a mad woman. And it takes a lot to make her laugh so hard that she pees. Tell me what happened."
"Patient confidentiality, Eli." Alex winked.
"You're cruel. Fine, Pavla will tell me. Or Novak will. He was walking by, you know. Apparently, Tino is an incredible singer."
"La la la! I speak no evil! I see no evil! I hear no evil!"
"Fine, fine. I'll remember not to ask you for gossip. Hey, what are you doing now?"
"Getting Tino some milk. Afterwards, I basically have free time unless anyone else needs a surgery, which doesn't seem to be the case. I'll probably go in and have the discussion with Tino that I promised. You get off in an hour, right?"
"Yes, but wait. Discussion with Tino? Why didn't I hear about this?"
"Oh, I was going to tell you, I promise. He's interested in Armenian-Ottoman history, that's all. He wants my take on it."
"He didn't ask for Sadik to join you, did he?"
"That would be more than awkward. I think he has the tact not to do that. I have nothing against Sadik, but it's a sensitive topic. God knows how Novak and Andy* can talk about politics so nonchalantly."
"Anyone that could get mad at Novak is the kind of person that kicks babies as a hobby. Into fans."
Alex laughed in spite of himself. "That's a horrible joke, Eli."
She laughed as well. "I don't know why I said that. Excuse me while I get an exorcism."
"You're excused." They smirked at one another as Alexianos headed to the cafeteria, "You should come over tonight, by the way! I got Gnomeo and Juliet on DVD."
"Ooh! I love me some Elton John! Count me in."
…
"Do you think the Dhimmi* were persecuted more for their religion or their ethnicity?" Tino asked, popping a tater-tot into his mouth.
"Definitely for their ethnicity. Or…maybe the religion, too? I really have no idea. I just wish that more people would recognize what happened."
"Does it make you resent Turkish people?"
"No, I don't like to generalize. One of my friends is Turkish, after all. It's just that when something that horrible happens, it needs to come out in the open."
"Are you afraid something like this will happen again?"
"Very. The fact that there still isn't worldwide recognition is shocking…I mean, Hitler justified his killings after seeing how the murder of my people went unpunished. It's horrible, really."
Tino digested Alex's information thoroughly, taking time to contemplate each answer. "You've really been helpful. Thank you very much for taking the time off to chat with me."
Doctor Kirzigian smiled. "It's been my pleasure. What got you interested in this part of the world in the first place?"
"When it comes to history, I'm insatiable. I have to know exactly what happened, you know? And so, when I heard about the Genocide, I had to learn more. And it's also a matter of justice- when people are aware of the truth, they're more likely to act pursuant to it."
"That's very true. It's nice to talk to someone that's neither Armenian nor Turkish, but still interested in what happened. You're from Finland, right?"
"Yep! Helsinki. It's a very nice city, but I love it here in California. You can't beat this weather. Did you grow up here?"
"I did. I actually went to North Hollywood High."
"You don't say? I teach there."
"Doctor Hedervary told me that. How do you like it?"
He smiled. "I love teaching- it makes my day when one of my students really gets into the material. How do you like being a surgeon?"
"It's a great job. It's sometimes stressful, but there's nothing I'd rather do. As a teacher, I'm sure you understand what I mean."
The blond nodded before checking his watch. "Oh my gosh! I've taken an hour out of your schedule already!"
Alexianos chuckled. "It's okay- I wasn't going to be doing anything else. I should head on out, but if there's anything you need, please feel free to press the button next to you."
"I'll be fine. Thanks, again!"
Alex left the room with a strange new energy- he felt oddly at peace after the discussion. Perhaps someone had given himanesthesia, as well?
….
"Oy, sranje!" Pavla exclaimed as she dropped her coffee thermos, the now-cold drink spilling across the sidewalk. She frowned- now she would have to buy a new one, and she barely had ten dollars to her name.
However, she quickly smiled once more. There was a Starbucks a few blocks away, and if luck was on her side, Feliciano would be working his shift. The Slovenian woman hurried her pace, practically running to visit her…acquaintance? Friend? She really wasn't sure what to call the man that she had chatted with on multiple occasions. He certainly wasn't a stranger, if that cleared up anything. Through their discourse, Pavla had learned that Feliciano loved pasta, chocolate, and cats; that he attended graduate school at UCLA; and that he interned at Pfizer. He was twenty-five years old, had auburn hair, and was an inch shorter than she.
And he gave her free coffee on Valentine's day.
She blushed- thinking rationally, it was merely a friendly gesture on Feliciano's behalf. After all, he had never asked her out, had he? And though Pavla was by no terms traditional, she did look for tangible interest in a man before deciding to ask him for a date. To her, it seemed that Feliciano was content with their weird in-between-acquaintances-and-friends stage. So, she must content herself with it, as well.
She opened the glass door of the café, feeling fortunate that there was no line. And Feliciano was even at the register! She would have to consult her rosary in thanks when she got home.
"Pavla, ciao!" The Italian man called from behind the counter, waving with excitement at the brunette in front of him. Pavla grinned.
"Ciao, Feli! How are you?"
"I've been great! Oh, I'm a little nervous, as my presentation will be in a month, but I'm preparing for it whenever I get the chance. How are you?"
"Good luck with that- I know that they'll pass you! I'm doing pretty well- it's been slow paced at the hospital, which is good. I prefer having little to fix when it comes to people's lives. It's weird that there aren't more people in here- it's such a lovely day."
"I think you missed the rush. About an hour ago, it was packed. So, what can I get you?"
"I'll have…hmm…what is the blond roast like?"
"It's good, but I don't think you'd like it. You tend to order your coffee strong."
He noticed that? Perhaps he was more interested than Pavla thought.
"All-righty. I'll just get my usual, then." The nurse figured she could test his memory a bit more.
"A dark roast, venti, with a pump of sweetener but no cream. Got it!"
Feliciano's chatty manner could lead people to believe he was thoughtless, but Pavla had to disagree. He remembered all that? She headed over to the counter, waiting for her drink.
"So, what are you doing tonight?"
The Slovenian woman felt her breath catch. Was he going to ask her out? "Tonight?" She smiled shyly.
"Yep! It's a Friday- are you going out with any friends?"
Oh. So he was simply being friendly.
"No- I didn't make any plans for this weekend. I'll probably just go home and feed my cat." She laughed nervously- why on earth did she say that? Now she would sound crazy…
"You have a cat?" Feliciano glanced at her while preparing her coffee.
"I do- his name is Kabuki."
He smiled. "That's cute. What kind of cat is Kabuki?"
"He's an American wirehair, I think. He's very cute."*
"Aww. Well, I hate to intrude on your quality time with him, but I was wondering if you'd like to get some dinner with me. My brother owns a restaurant in Pasadena, and it's pretty good, if I can say so myself."
She beamed. "Are you asking me on a date?"
Feliciano blushed. "Well…if you…I mean, yes. I am."
"I'd love to go on a date with you."
"Great! Let me give you the directions," he scrawled an address on a napkin, "Can you read that okay?"
"Yep! I work with doctors- your writing is twenty-times more legible than what I usually see."
He laughed. "I'll meet you at eight, then, Pavla."
…
"Novak!" Pavla nearly pounced on her Serbian roommate. "Guess who has a date tonight? Guess? Guess? Guess?"
"Well, this is a shot in the dark, but you?"
"Yes! With Feliciano!" She began giggling almost hysterically with excitement.
"Woah, calm down. You don't want to pee yourself again, do you?" He winked. Pavla smacked his arm facetiously.
"Hush now, that was hilarious. I've never seen Alexianos so uncomfortable in my life."
He laughed. "That poor guy. So, Feliciano asked you out, then?"
"Yes! His brother has a restaurant in Pasadena, which means that not only do I get to go on a date with a cute, friendly, and intelligent guy, but I also get to eat a meal that isn't made to be heated up in the microwave. Whoo hoo!"
"That definitely is something to be excited about. Good for you! Hey, Andy!"
"Hm?" The Croatian entered the kitchen, still shaving his face. A glob of shaving cream fell to the floor.
"Pavla is going on a date!"
Andelko smiled at his friend. "Kidnapping is illegal in all fifty states, Pavla."
She laughed. "Fuck you!"
"Swearing is not pretty," he teased, knowing that such a phrase would have no effect on his feminist friend.
"Neither is a concussion."
"Well played."
"Don't you at least want to know who I'm going out with?"
"Yeah, who?"
"Feliciano!"
Andy grinned. "Really? Congratulations. He seems nice."
"He is. And he's buying me food, which makes me like him even more."
The Croatian made a mock-whining sound. "Novak doesn't buy me food anymore."
"Then he doesn't love you at all." Pavla tried to keep her face stoical and not smile, which only led the other two to advance and tickle her.
"Ah! Haha, you guys, stop! Stop, or I seriously will have to pee!"
…
A/N: Yay! I already have the story completely written, so I promise that I won't have few and far-in-between updates on this (and thankfully so- I have finals this week, and I'll be turning 17 on Sunday, so I'm going away for the weekend to Newport Beach :D). Anyhow, here are some notes!
-The "Norway" and "Somalia" statements come from assorted AlbinoBlackSheep videos. If you've never seen them, they're wonderfully weird.
- I don't really do this, since I'm Finnish-American, but Finnish people love milk almost as much as they love coffee or Finnish vodka (which they really, really love). Many young Finns drink it with every meal.
-Serbians and Croatians are known to generally not get along as nations, which I think makes Novak and Andelko's relationship even cuter. :) If you'd like to read more about them, check out Raivas-Latvijas' account.
-The Dhimmi were the Armenians in the Ottoman Empire (which is now modern-day Turkey). They had very few rights under the Ottoman Empire, and in 1915 nearly two-million Armenians were killed in genocides by the Empire's officials. It's a very sad event that is still widely unacknowledged, partly due to diplomatic cowardice. Though many in the United States recognize the genocide, our government does not officially acknowledge it, although President Obama considers legally acknowledging it. Let's hope he does!
Please review! Your reviews make my day and encourage me to post the rest of this. Perhaps just tell me your favorite character or write gibberish? I'll take whatever I can get. :D