Naruko X Shikamaru One Shot
Naruko vs Shikamaru and the Yucky Cold Medicine.
"Oh god… Why me?" Shikamaru asked, deadpan in expression, his tone serving to only further reflect his current situation which was undoubtably more troublesome than any he had ever faced before.
"Shika… I'm sick *Cough* *Cough* ack…" Naruko called, her voice gravelly in tone and coughing up a lung, surrounded by snot filled tissues and empty ramen cups as she laid on her couch beneath the warm embrace of her blankets, tucked inside. Shikamaru would've thought she looked cute if she wasn't coughing like a chainsmoker.
Sighing heavily Shikamaru knew he was in for hell given that the boyfriend of Konoha's number 1 Unpredictable Ninja would be forced to take care of her. He heard horror stories from Team 7 about the last time Naruko had a cold.
Things harsher than anything Kakashi experienced during the Third Shinobi World War, more traumatising than what Sasuke felt during the Uchiha Massacre, and twice as annoying as Sakura had ever seen from the loudmouthed blonde.
And after finding out about Naruko and Shikamaru's budding relationship, they had finally felt a relief from the burden of taking care of a sick Naruko, finally somebody else who would suffer the pain… FOREVER!
"What a drag" muttered the Nara, before approaching the coughing Blonde, her nose running as she sniffed giving Shikamaru the audible pleasure of listening to snot burble causing him to grimace at the sight of the illness that had befallen his girlfriend.
"M' Hungee" Naruko whined, indicative of her desire to eat Ramen.
"Naruko you're not gonna get better by just eating Ramen, you need to take some medicine" Shikamaru replied only to have Naruko's eyes widen in shock, knowing full well the bane of her existence whenever she had a cold.
"No way! That medicine is disgusting" Naruko protested, hiding beneath the blankets of her couch, worried that Shikamaru was going to force-feed her the 'yucky medicine' as she called it so many years ago when Old Man Hokage used to take care of her as a young child.
"Then how are you gonna get better?" Shikamaru asked, hoping to convince Naruko to make this as easy as possible on the both of them. He didn't want to be forced into making her take the medicine until she left him no other choice.
"I dunno I just will" argued the Nine Tailed Jinchuuriki coughing once more and grumbling to herself.
"Stupid fox, can heal injuries just fine but a cold? Ooooh No, he couldn't possibly heal that!" muttered Naruko, angrily clenching her fists at how the Nine Tailed Fox seemed to be amused by how his current host and her mate were suffering by his refusal to cure her ailment.
"I'm willing to be he's probably laughing at us right now" Shikamaru commented.
Naruko nodded in affirmation as the distant yet bellowing roars of laughter were made clear to Naruko considering the Tailed Beast she held inside her.
"Look it doesn't change the fact that you need to take your medicine Naruko. Come on, it'll make you feel better" Shikamaru stated only to get a cold glare from the blonde.
"No" Naruko replied bitterly.
"Naruko" Shikamaru spoke, his tone becoming insistent on having his girlfriend take the medicine.
"No!" Naruko answered childishly, pouting as she adamantly refused to take her medicine.
"Naruko you're about to leave me no other choice either you take the medicine or I'm gonna shove it down your throat and by Kami you're gonna like it" Shikamaru growled, taking out a bottle containing the liquid who's label read 'cold medicine.'
"Make me!" Naruko retorted, poking her tongue out before coughing again.
"THAT'S IT!" exclaimed the Nara, no longer standing for Naruko's childish games. Leaping towards the blonde, Naruko intercepted Shikamaru's arms, stopping her boyfriend from giving her the yucky medicine.
"Stop being so troublesome Naruko-baka I'm just trying to help you" Shikamaru argued, wrestling for dominance over his girlfriend.
"Like hell you are! I don't want the yucky medicine Shika, and I'm not gonna let you take me without a fight!" Naruko snapped, looking for an opportunity to escape from the EVIL clutches of her boyfriend trying to help her get better.
… Okay maybe she was being irrational but the Yucky Medicine was REALLY yucky in her defence.
"YAAH!" Naruko cried as she kicked Shikamaru off her couch before scrambling away with Shikamaru giving chase around her apartment. The two lovers were caught around a kitchen table, Shikamaru on one side and Naruko on the other, each one trying to give the other the slip by switching between table ends in an attempt to fool the other and misdirect them into a false lead on which way they were running.
"Give up Naruko or I'm gonna make you swallow the whole bottle" Shikamaru threatened, seemingly determined to ensure that Naruko is never sick for a LONG time with such a large dosage of Cold Medicine causing the Uzumaki girl to gasp.
"You WOULDN'T!" Naruko replied, equally determined to escape her boyfriend and the yucky medicine.
"Try me" Shikamaru replied, glaring down at Naruko Uzumaki before jumping over the table in his attempt to pin his girlfriend down and give her what she needed to get better.
Being quick on her feet Naruko ran towards her bathroom, quickly formulating a plan to get Shikamaru to stop following her by means of a man's one weakness.
"SEXY JUTSU!" Naruko announced as she performed the Henge that normally transformed her into an older and nude version of herself, all on display for her boyfriends viewing pleasure.
Unfortunately for Shikamaru however he was horrified at the results of Naruko's jutsu.
"Kiss me Shika-kun" cooed a grizzled, almost male sounding voice as Shikamaru felt like letting out a high pitched scream upon the sights and sounds he heard before him.
The Sexy Jutsu had worked as it usually did, however Naruko instead of looking like an attractive young woman instead had her fleshed looking gangrenous and rotten, her eyes and nose bleeding and her long blonde hair draped over her face, looking like something out of a horror movie Shikamaru had once seen called 'The Circle'.
"I want you Shika-kun… make love to me!" cooed the zombie looking Naruko, teasing Shikamaru as her hand travelled across her rotting body as if to provoke Shikamaru to faint due to blood loss from the nose bleed.
Knowing that it was do or die time Shikamaru mustered up all the courage he had and opted to tackle this problem head on. Pumping chakra into his feet Shikamaru dashed towards Naruko at great speeds, knocking her over and out of her 'Dead-Sexy Jutsu' as he nicknamed it and unscrewed the cap of the bottle of Cold Medicine before pinning down his girlfriend.
"NOOOOOOOO!" Naruko screamed, desperately struggling to escape from her boyfriend, but to no avail as she couldn't move.
"Shika-kun please don't do it, I-*GULP*" It was all over for her, Naruko was forced to swallow her Cold Medicine. shortly removing the medicine bottle from her mouth Naruko coughed and sputtered before poking her tongue out due to the bitter liquid she was forced to taste.
"Eww yuck!" Naruko whined, desperately wanting to get rid of the taste that was left in her mouth by the dreaded Cold Medicine.
Shikamaru released Naruko from his grip as he laid against her bathroom wall, tired out after the chase she put him on, panting and feeling a the heat on his forehead as he wiped away the sweat.
"There… Maybe now you'll *COUGH* *COUGH*" Shikamaru hacked, feeling some phlegm build up in his chest.
"Shika are you okay?" Naruko asked concerned for her boyfriend before feeling his temperature which as it turned out was quite warm.
Slyly grinning her foxy grin, Shikamaru gulped as the dreadful reality of his situation finally began to sink in as he realised that he was about to get a taste of his own medicine… Quite literally.
"Oh shit" remarked Shikamaru, knowing that he was probably going to suffer as Naruko had before him.
"REVENGE!" Naruko exclaimed as she yanked the Cold Medicine from her boyfriend's hands and decided to have some fun returning the favour to her 'Dr Shikamaru.'
Two Days later
Sasuke Uchiha was in hell, literally.
There was his brother killing the clan, and then there was this, hell in its purest form, nothing could've ever prepared him for this, no amount of training or studying could save him now, he knew it was over but lamented the fact that it had to end this way as Team 7 was about to embark on their toughest mission yet.
Likewise Sakura Haruno couldn't escape. She tried to run, but was dragged back into the fold, if her team was going to suffer, she would suffer with them. It was the first time she ever saw strong emotion from her usually aloof sensei and her crush Sasuke.
This was true fear, the likes of which she hadn't felt since Zabuza during the land of the waves mission.
But even that was a more merciful fate than what she was about to undertake.
And finally Kakashi Hatake had the look of a man who knew that the worst was coming and wanted to die.
Why him, why was it that he was forced to do such a thankless and horrific task. He could've been at home reading Icha Icha Paradise, or better yet doing anything other than this, Buying Dango for Anko, reliving the painful memories of Obito's death, hell even sparring with Might Gai would've been preferable to the pain and torment the Copy Ninja was about to face.
And yet the three members of Team 7 shivered as they heard two sickly voices call out in unison.
"KAKASHI-SENSEI, WE'RE SICK!"
A/N: A story I just decided to write out of the blue because right now, much like Naruko I AM SICK AND IT FUCKING SUCKS!
Seriously, I hate being sick because your body is all like
"ya know what fuck you humans, you're all fleshy and spongy with your organs and shit, so ya know what FUCK YOU I'm just gonna let you get infected with shitty viruses, yep that's what we do, because we're fucking viruses. Make you get all sick and stuff"
GRRRRRRR *COUGH* *COUGH* *HACK* *WHEEZE* … Lyn sad :'(
Seriously though I hope you guys enjoyed this story because I love the Naruko X Shikamaru pairing so much and to give it more love makes me happy :D
So here ya go, I'd recommend reading this if you're feeling sick because hopefully in some small way it'll help make you feel better.