Sworn Off Interference

Ok I realize I haven't posted anything in forever, which explains the recent plummet in my views. I totally understand if everybody hates me right now. But I was searching for an old story to pick up, now that I FINALLY found some free time, and realized this one only needed a few tweaks! So here it is… in all its glory.

Not hers. At least not anymore he wasn't. His heart belonged to Holly now. She was the reason why, and furthermore had lost the right to complain. Not that she had complained in the first place. It was good to see him happy again.

Granted, she had Carl now, but it just wasn't the same as being with Will. Carl was comfort, someone to fill the otherwise empty house she returns to. He was dinner every Wednesday night at Breadsticks, and leftovers Thursday, the perfect routine. But Will was passion, a spark that left her with a tingling sensation for days. He's the kiss that left her speechless, and ignited a fire in her very being that nothing could extinguish.

This is why she was back where she started, with just another obstacle between them and the fairy tale ending they had both envisioned. However, this time, she was the obstacle.

It was all for the best, she had convinced herself one afternoon. Before it was just her and Will, until she had been unable to seal the deal, and he had decided to find it elsewhere. So naturally, she had pulled Carl into the mess that was her love life. It was entirely her fault, well, not entirely, maybe just that last bit.

So now she would not only hurt Will if she tried to fix this mess, but Carl would end up hurt as well. Besides, Holly was already doing the job for her. Already in the days since Holly's return to the school, she had seen that spring return to Will's step, the glimmer of hope that accompanied a possibility at love slowly reappear to his eyes.

This was exactly why she couldn't interfere. Interfering would hurt People. Carl would get hurt because she had married him against her better judgment. Holly, who Emma was sure was smitten with Will, would get hurt because Emma had ripped away the one stability in her life. Will would get hurt because she had strung him along for so long, hurting him for a year now with her constant need to hide from her emotions.

Emma had left herself out of this equation because she would always wind up hurting. Either by the longing in her heart for a man who was not her husband, or the pained expressions on the faces of those she would hurt in an effort to get that man. Yet another reason why she couldn't say a word, draw out a single plan, even let a miniscule amount of hope escape the darkness of her dreams. She could deal with her own pain easily enough; she had done it for all the years spent on looking at his own marriage. What she couldn't deal with was seeing the heartache her attempts to relieve that pain plastered on the faces of another.

Will was no exception; in fact, he was the main reason for her lips remaining sealed. Will had already been hurt so much, and he was finally starting to return to his usual self after she so effectively stomped on his heart. That was what Emma wanted, seeing him happy again. What really hurt was the fact that, in the process of regaining his shattered pride, he had moved on from her. Yes, she had wanted him happy again, after that failure of a marriage, but she had always secretly hoped he could regain that feeling with her.

True, she had overreacted earlier in the year when she called him a slut, but after she gave him no chance to redeem himself was when she had really overstepped her boundaries. After all, they weren't exactly going out when he committed those heinous acts she made sure the whole school heard about. Besides after the "incident," as the school had seen fit to dub it, he hadn't even looked at another woman the same way he had looked at her. Maybe... But no, she couldn't allow herself to think those thoughts. Because once she started thinking, she started to accumulate guilt, and soon the overwhelming intensity to rectify the situation would invade her every thought until she either had a mental breakdown, or tried to fix things. Which would only make everything worse.

So no, she wouldn't think about it. She would sit in her office, eating her lunches alone for god knows how long. She would polish every grape individually, because contrary to the belief of her way to messy husband, things tasted better clean.

I know, insanely short, and way to angsty for even my standards. But it was fun to write. So anyways, comment and review! The new obsession is doctor who, because Wemma actually seems to be getting somewhere nowadays, and alien timelord sci-fi is just so amazing ;] oh and by-the-way, blog is up, if anybody cares to check out my profile, the link is over there.

Thatnerdychic :]