A/N: Hey guys! so, this is my first story ever and it has been sitting on my computer for a little while, but i thought i would just go ahead and publish it. Please be gentle with me haha.
It's set sometime during late season 4 when Castle finds out about Beckett's secret. Always hasn't happened yet.
Disclaimer: I do not own Castle or it's characters, sadly.
"I love you," she says.
He almost slams the door in her face.
"I know you haven't been to the precinct in a while, and I don't understand that, but please listen to me." She moves to take his hand, but he pulls it away.
She tries not to let the hurt on her face show too much, but he sees it anyways. Forcing down the hurt and looking back into his eyes, she steadies her resolve, realizing that it's make it or break it, jump then fall crunch time.
"Castle, I think about you all the time. Cliché, I know, but it is the truth. Two months I haven't seen you. That's seventy- one days I spend thinking about your baby blues that I get lost in every time. Seventy-one days I think about how we used to spend almost every day together, seventy-one days being so lost and confused without you, seventy- one days I think of what went wrong and why you stopped coming, stopped answering my call, my texts, seventy- one days I spend falling that much more in love with you."
Sometime during her confession, Kate unconsciously moved closer to Castle, now only being a few inches from his face.
"Tell me you love me too." She whispers. "I know you do, just say it. Please"
She is begging him now. Kate Beckett is begging.
She keeps looking into his eyes to find something, anything that will let her know he cares about her.
She sees nothing but emptiness reflecting back at her, mocking her.
With tears in her eyes that she refuses to let fall, she steps away, back, as far as his apartment living room will let her. Then she looks at him. Really looks. He looks like shit, she thinks, I don't look any better.
"Castle, what did I do?" she is openly crying right now, openly letting him see how much his absence has affected her.
He can't stand to see her so broken, so not Kate, so he steels his resolves even more- no matter how much it hurts.
He looks her straight in the eyes and confirms Kate's biggest fears.
"You didn't do anything, Detective. I just finally realized that I need to stop playing cop and start acting like a grown- up for once in my life, which is why I have decided to stop shadowing you for good.
"like you have said before, I'm not a cop, so now I am taking your advice and listening to you for once. As of seventy- one days ago, as you have already pointed out, I am officially done with the Twelve Precinct. It's time I learn to be responsible."
"Castle, please don't do this!" she says, as he moves to close the door once again.
"Goodbye, Detective Beckett, it was an honor to have shadowed you; please tell Ryan and Esposito that I am truly sorry for my abrupt absence, I'm sure they will understand."
And just like that, Kate Beckett's world came crashing down.