Ship: Blaine/Sam; Kurt/Sebastian
Rating: NC-17.
Summary: Kurt and Sebastian are involved in the events of their as perfect as bumbling friends: Blaine and Sam. Linked by a common hard fate they end up to confide each other their torments, finding out that maybe they could ally.
Author's Note: Hi everyone! I'm happy to publish this story about kurtbastian (that, as you know, I love so much) but also BLAM! I started to love this ship since the first meet between Blaine and Sam, but just a few time ago I decided to write about them and I'm satisfied with the result. As the first story ("I don't want a man like you") this story is complete in italian and is translated by Edyferrone that I want thanks so, so, so, so, much.
Enjoy!
/
Chapter 1
"Good morning, Kurt." Sam greets him happily, but Kurt doesn't really know what's in this school that could actually make someone as excited as he sounds.
Everybody can guess that being Kurt Hummel is not that easy, especially in a town like Lima.
Everything seems like it was meant to make your life a living hell, even the car double parking in front of yours, blocking your own from moving back into the street. Everything drives Kurt crazy and especially, the biggest of hells, his high school does so.
Being Kurt Hummel is hard, the hardest thing someone could ever be through; especially since he's the guy who's considered the worst underdog ever; he's not really that handsome, has got ego issues and a diva attitude that is way too evident to be ignored.
Yes, Kurt Hummel is gay, not just gay, but totally gay, the kind of gay you can smell from a distance and you can recognize from the most obvious of clichés; weird clothes, sequins anywhere, hips waving when he walks and a strange passion for tails attached to his ordinary wardrobe outfits. But Kurt has never cared too much, and he won't until the next bully attack; until the next bruise or scratch marks his body.
But Kurt always wanders with that proud look on his face, happy about himself; or at least, that's what he shows the world while he's pitiless to himself in the insides. The truth is indeed that he can't be sure about himself because, even if he's grown in the last years and his body turned more boyish and attractive, he isn't completely satisfied and the lack of hairs on his body, his pale skin and thin torso – abs MIA – don't really make him that good-looking in his opinion. He is completely different from what he himself would find attractive.
It's not even easy to make anyone believe you're perfect when you can't convince yourself about it either; living a lie is difficult and Kurt, even if he keeps on trying, can't manage to achieve it completely, therefore, at times, he just cries in his room, wrapped in the smell of his favorite candle burning and the softness of his covers.
There's a person who does make this place a little better somehow and it's Sam Evans.
Sam is his best friend now. They love each other and have become so close that they're almost in symbiosis; especially since Sam confessed that he was gay, after Kurt's gay radar had started throwing rainbow sparks in his presence. After weeks during which they had tried to get closer to each other, eventually Sam couldn't keep it anymore and told him, but obviously, the rest of the world didn't know and it's never going to find out. Maybe his parents will, someday.
Kurt wasn't happy about it, he sees it like cowardice, but he also knows that Sam's life was going to get a lot worse at school if he ever came out, so he doesn't feel like blaming the fear in his eyes when other people just talked about the topic. In the end, they're best friends, so they just help each other; Sam is the cutest and most beloved guy at school, with his quarterback role and his happy smile. He is handsome and that's why the girls go after him; he is nice and that's why the guys buzz around him like he is their queen bee or alpha, something like that. Anyway, Kurt is the one living in the shadow again, but if it's Sam's shadow, he really doesn't care that much as Sam is the only one who understands him in this school, who respects him and often defends him, even if he could just ignore it; he could have spent lunch with his popular friends instead of sitting with Kurt, and he could avoid walking so close to Kurt along the hallways so that if someone had pushed him around, he would have killed him, but he won't stop doing that.
Being friends with Sam Evans therefore has its positive and negative aspects, but in the end, everything is all relative if Kurt considers that he's the best person he's ever met, apart from those moments of stupidity when Sam looks like he's come out of a cheap 80s TV series with silly medics doing idiotic stuff. And then he's got that obsession for impressions. Kurt thinks it's going to pass sooner or later but he can't be sure. Well, Kurt can say that he's objectively smarter than Sam, but Sam is surely more handsome and funny than Kurt; eventually, it means that they complete one another and that's fine by them.
"Good morning Sam." He says after a long series of sober thoughts about how much his life in here sucks.
"Finally, I thought aliens kidnapped you." The boy replies with a fake scared wince that makes Kurt understand how much he hates seeing Kurt sacrificed in such a place. He'd want to see the light shine constantly.
"No, don't worry, I'm still here."
"You got lost for a moment. What were you thinking?" Sam asks, since he's obviously noticed the moment when Kurt started pondering and didn't greet back.
"I was just thinking." He replies, smiling. He knows how easy it is to convince Sam about something. He's so spontaneously honest that he believes the rest of the world is too, but that's not the case.
"I see. Maybe you think too much though," He notices as he grabs the chair to pull it back and sit at his usual place, next to his best friend.
"Maybe I do, but thinking can be useful at times," Kurt replies, a little offended. It's not the first time Sam tells him that, but how can Kurt not think?
"It'll hurt you," Sam whispers, but it's pretty evident that he doesn't want to say what he actually thinks. Sam sees everything innocently and positively, and Kurt doesn't even know how it is possible that life hasn't disappointed him yet.
"I know, I'll try not to think," Kurt answer, but he doesn't add that he would become a brainless jock like most of his friends that way; he doesn't want for Sam to feel like he's in the middle of this, even though sometimes he manages to reach high scores when it comes to stupidity.
Eventually, Sam lets the conversation drop, hoping that when he'll turn around again, he won't see Kurt thoughtful once more.
/
When Sebastian met Blaine days ago, he wouldn't have thought they could get along so well. Blaine was clearly at the center of the attention, since he was the new guy who came from who knows where, and of course, Sebastian thought the boy was a sociopathic guy who glued to him only to get some attention from anyone, since he was clearly an underdog and no one wanted to talk to him or else.
But he found out that he was wrong, oh so wrong.
"Hi." Sebastian's thoughts about their first encounter get interrupted from the source of his thinking in the flesh.
"Hi, Blaine. Did you sleep well?" He asks sniggering, hoping that he won't offend Blaine because he doesn't know him well enough to figure out whether he's touchy or not.
"Yeah, I did. Why is that?" Blaine asks curiously.
"Because you've arrived ten minutes later, and you're lucky enough that the teacher hasn't come yet." Sebastian makes him notice, even though he has never given particular importance to time or rules in general; but he knows what teachers think of the newbies. He had been there too, and he knows how important it is to impress them on the first days of school.
"Really? I didn't even realize!" Blaine answers surprised, looking at his watch with the Dalton badge.
Right, Dalton. The private school had been the first thing they had shared when they met at school, right in the room where they are right now. When Blaine sat beside him, Sebastian had sighed, hoping that he wasn't the one designed to give the first talk to the new guy; but then he saw that watch.
Dalton was an elite school in west Ohio – at least it's the only building that can be defined as school and not as a jail.
Sebastian didn't leave Dalton. In fact he was kicked out because he didn't give a damn about the rules. He had made out with a senior student in the Warblers' room. He was a sophomore back then. He hates rules, but he can't make any other mistakes or he's going to end up in a military school, and as years go by, he's starting to fear his dad's threats.
"C'mon, sit down, you have to let me copy math before the hour passes." Sebastian says as he notices that Blaine is still standing, not even looking like he's about to sit down.
He waits for a few moments more and then he tries to get his attention again. "Blainy? Earth calls Blainy," he doesn't manage to make him turn to him again.
Annoyed at the waiting, Sebastian stands up and steps to him until he's standing beside Blaine so that he can look right when Blaine's looking (he hates being ignored; no one can ignore Sebastian Smythe). When he understands what Blaine is staring at, his gaze becomes doubtful. Nothing interesting, except for nerd faces on the first line; the blackboard is still dirty with the white signs from eraser and the chalk; nothing seems to be different and yet Blaine is staring there, completely lost towards the two guys sitting at the first row of desk.
After a few moments of contemplation, Blaine seems to decide to let Sebastian participate in the thoughts that have possessed him. "Bas, did you see him?" He asks, like he believes that there's no need to give explanations because he thinks that his friend has already noticed.
"What?"
"You mean who. How couldn't you not see him? You disappoint me." Blaine teases but the truth is that what's before his eyes stunned him so much that he can't believe his friend wasn't as shocked as him, and how can Sebastian – who's been here for longer – not have noticed the boy before?
"Who? Hummel?" Sebastian asks amused since Blaine is pointing discretely at the two boys sitting there.
"I don't know their names … the blond one!" He adds, hoping that Sebastian can tell the name of the boy whom he's noticed as soon as he walked into the class.
"Hmm, Sam Evans. Good-looking guy, senior year, sexual preferences unknown. He's the bodyguard of his little friend, or maybe girlfriend, Kurt Hummel. He's the gayest of gays, so there are good chances that my gay radar works and Sam Evans is the second gayest thing in here." Sebastian explains quickly and then silence falls as Blaine processes all the information he's just got.
He stays in silence for a few seconds, rigid in his position, only to sit down a moment later. Sebastian sits down too, but he can't keep from giggling silently at Blaine's heart eyes. Well, Evans has got a gorgeous body, but there's no chance one might look as wrecked as Blaine seems from just staring; he didn't even think he was Blaine's kind of guy.
"Do you think he might play for our team?" He asks curiously at some point, not noticing that the teacher has now entered the room with their corrected essays under his arm. It usually makes Blaine very nervously, but now he's too busy to pay any attention to it.
"I don't know, I told you. Even if he were, he is still in the closet, so I would recommend you not to flirt."
Indeed, he doesn't know if he wants to let Blaine flirt with Sam. At McKinley, It's never easy to survive if you're outed and Hummel is the living proof of it. That's why he's never told anyone about his sexuality, not even Blaine knows. It's not like Sebastian wants to hide it, but he won't scream it out loud. If someone asked, he'd answer honestly, no problem with that, but if he can avoid the rumor at school, it would surely be better. Blaine is the new guy so no one asked him yet either. Kurt looks so gay that guys started mocking him without even knowing if he was actually homosexual until one day he stopped denying while the called him fag along the hallways.
Even if he's never going to admit it out loud, Sebastian respects how proudly Kurt shows who he is, the way he preens about himself, the stubborn way in which he pulls on another gay outfit when the first one gets dirt from a slushie. This respect is the reason why he didn't join the group of trolls that daily harasses him even though he usually makes fun of boys like Kurt when he goes to his favorite gay bar, Scandals.
"But he's so cute …" And this is the last comment before they stop wondering about the two guys in the front line because the teacher has started talking and they have to pay attention to him.
/
Of course Blaine and Sebastian haven't notice that, but while they were discussing about the two boys, the objects of their thinking are doing the same.
Indeed, from the moment he turned, Sam had found himself in front of the most amazing thing he had ever seen: a black-haired guy, his smile as shiny as the sun, with an awkward bow-tie around his neck and two big hazel eyes. He doesn't know what his name is, but if love at first sight exists, now he knows what it feels like.
"Kurt …"
"Tell me." Kurt says, turning to his friend and his suddenly dreamy voice. The teacher has just entered to room with their essays, so how can Sam sound so amazed?
"I'm in love." He says with the tone of voice of one who's just seen the most beautiful things ever as he leans his chin on the palm of his hand almost comically.
"Are you crazy?" Kurt asks sniggering. He thinks this is just one of Sam's silly moments.
"No, I swear, look." He says, turning back just a little.
"I can't see anything, honey." Kurt says, looking doubtful, like he's understood that this isn't just Sam fooling around; there's something, or better someone who really got his attention and Kurt is curious to find out just who he is.
"Black hair, awkward bow-tie," Sam points, still turned though so that no one can see him.
Kurt stares for a moment at the boy Sam is pointing at. He's really cute and if he remembers well, he's the new guys that had arrived a few weeks ago. He isn't as gossipy as everybody thinks for unknown reasons, but he's pretty sure he's the guy. Pure certainty is instead what he feels towards the boy sitting beside the new one and sniggering: Sebastian Smythe.
He has never had much consideration of him, even if his gay radar practically explodes whenever he's around him, maybe because Kurt has caught him staring obscenely at the asses of some football players as they walked along the hallway. He doesn't seem too nice honestly, but new guy is laughing, so Kurt won't judge any longer. He just turns to his friend.
"I think he's the new guy, but I don't know his name."
"Are you sure?" Sam asks, way too sad; how can he always take everything so dramatically?
"Yeah, I'm sure, but if you stay silent during the roll call, we might find out his name."
Sam smiles immediately, looking back at Blaine – who is listening and staring to the teacher - for a moment, before he's turning forward again.
The teacher puts the register on his desk, letting it fall with a thud that makes Sam startle from how focused he was on the teacher's gestures – way too slowly if you'd asked Sam. He leafs through it lazily (Sam doesn't know if it all just seems slow because he wants to know the name so badly) and he starts calling their names.
"Edward Ames."
The teacher's voice gets to the boy at the last line who answers annoyed with a whispered "here" that is barely audible.
"Blaine Anderson," The teacher calls; Sam turns again and he finally sees the guy he is interested in answering with a flat but jovial "here". His voice is … Sam wouldn't even know how to describe it, but he loves it.
"Well, you got his name." Kurt notices smugly while the teacher goes on and his friend turns to him with a huge smile, one that only his huge mouth could allow.
They pay attention to the lesson without adding anything about this handsome Blaine guy who caught his friend's attention. Actually Kurt feels like some is looking at them for a moment; as he turns, he notices that Sebastian is looking away like he's been caught staring. He doesn't know why he was staring and he doesn't care about it, though it's weird, so weird.