Title: Gravity
Characters: James/OC
Summary: James had more a reason behind killing Bella than just his bloodthirst. He doesn't want Edward to have what he couldn't.
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. I do not own Gravity by Sara Bareilles.
Something always brings me back to never takes too long
No matter what I say or do
I'll still feel you here 'til the moment I'm gone.
It wasn't something he liked to think about, and it caused him much grievance every time he did remember. But, every so often, usually when we was alone and left with his thoughts, James would remember her and be thrust back in time. Back when there was no Victoria or Laurent. Back when James wasn't a vampire.
Back when she was alive.
The year was 1811, in a small town outside of the bustling streets of London. James was of the age where he should be considering a wife. So, his mother had prepared a ball in honor of his twenty-first birthday. She had invited many young eligible women from around their town.
James had come home recently from college in London, apprehensively of course to see his mother, unaccompanied by a young lady - as his mother had so hoped. After all, James Withersmith was the most eligible bachelor of his class and town.
The ball began at the edges of darkness, having all the footmen of Withersmith Court going around and lightly the lanterns along the path to their mansion. Once all were lit the footmen lined up outside the house, ready to receive their guests.
James watched from his quarters above, sighing in frustration as his mother's 'biggest and best' attitude. Charles, his personal footman stood next to him, holding his vest out for when he was ready. James stepped back, allowing Charles to take over from there.
"Are you ready for the evening, Master James?" Charles asked, fixing the young man's cravat and straitening his waistcoat.
"I am unsure of my mother's intentions. It is questionable whether she wishes me to choose my bride to court or she intends to wed me this eve," he said, in his soft, deep voice. Charles shared a chuckle with the young heir as he helped him slide on his boots.
"Are you ready, Master James?"
James nodded, his long blonde hair was pushed up, flinging itself haphazardly around his face. He ran a hand through it quickly and sighed.
"I believe that I am. Is Mother ready for me to receive my party guests?"
A deep voice assaulted all who inhabited the room. "Yes, she is. As it so happens, everyone is waiting to receive you in the foyer."
James turned away from his mirror and smiled at his best friends Samuel and Christophe, walking to them happily and embracing them both.
"Well, let us not keep the ladies waiting."
The three wealthy gentlemen made their way to the top of the stairs where the elderly Mr. Withersmith and his wife stood awaiting their son.
"Mother, Father. I give my gratitude to you for preparing this lovely evening party," James said, kissing his mother on the cheek. "Now, I believe you are to make a speech."
Mr. Withersmith stepped forward onto the balcony, as the three young men ran down the stairs to their fellow comrades who all stood on one side of the room. Immediately, Sam and Christophe were on the girl hunt.
"James," Sam elbowed him, nodding towards a blonde who was looking his way. He nodded to her in return of her notions, but otherwise saw no interest in her. Christophe and Jack - another of James' school friends pointed out a lovely brunette in the corner. James did not smile back at her smiling face, for smiling was not something the young man participated in.
But, finally, just after his father's speech ended, he saw her.
She had beautiful red hair that had been drawn back with a stark white bow tagged onto the back of her hairstyle. She looked as if she was much enjoying the party already, having a drink from one of the footmen - who in turn flirted at her.
James, knowing that if his father knew of the particular footmen's encounter with the young lady, he would soon be removed of duty, had half of a mind to tell his father immediately. But, he reconciled with the young footman, also struck by her inhumane beauty.
Before he made true sense of his notions, he had gotten the attention of Sam and Christophe and practically shoved their awaiting eyes upon his beautiful girl.
"That, right there, may be the most beautiful lady I have ever seen in my entire life. Yes, and I am not even going to lie. I want her," Sam said, looking at the young lady in awe and hunger.
James shoved his friend backwards a step and looked at him in obvious anger.
"Come on, Sam, old friend. Can't you see? Our dear companion here is in love, with Miss Maple," Christophe said, patting James on the back. "Go get 'er."
The music began and the young lad made his way to the beautiful young redheaded girl. The other women she had been talking with quieted and she turned around at their notions.
"Miss Maple," James said with less confidence than a mouse. "Allow me to introduce myself. I am James Withersmith."
She nodded at him politely, and very lady-like. "Mr. Withersmith."
"M-May I have the pleasure of this next dance?" he asked, his voice soft like honey, but deep like a man's voice would be.
"I would be honored to dance with you, Mr. Withersmith - obviously the birthday boy."
They took their places across from one another on the floor as the dance began. A dance that would change James' life forever.
You hold me without keep me without chains.I never wanted anything so much
Than to drown in your love and not feel your rain.
"Well," the young girl asked, looking at her chaperone and Mr. Withersmith. "Shall we walk?"
James smiled, nodding to the elderly woman and taking her arm in his, exiting through the front door of the manor. He turned his head just a bit, seeing his father and the beautiful Miss Lottie talking together.
James knew that his father had already grown very fond of Miss Maple and he knew that his father intended on marrying the two of them, even if just to have Lottie as his daughter. His mother adored her as well, doting on her all of the time and loving her to a degree still unknown to man. It was nice for her to have another lady in the household. And Miss Lottie was happy to apply in that position.
Set me free, leave me be.
I don't want to fall another moment into your I am and I stand so tall
Just the way I'm supposed to you're on to me and all over me.
"Good afternoon, Mr. Withersmith, Mr. Withersmith," she nodded at both the young heir and the fortune holder himself. Sharing a bit of a hidden smile and laugh with James, she quickly blew a soft kiss before Miss Bellmen stepped up behind her.
"Have you had a nice day?" Lottie asked, pulling up her hand to her hair and touching it softly.
James loved the action, the way it made her chest rise up a bit, the way her eyes seemed to drift downwards and then look up underneath her lashes. She loved her hair too, the way it sat in still curls that framed her face as she had pulled the two front pieces back.
"Yes. It's been very pleasant, thank you. And yourself?"
"Yes, a great day indeed. I hit the bull's-eye several times in archery this afternoon so, I'm very pleasantly happy about that."
"Excellent. And, Miss Bellmen, how have you been?"
Miss Bellmen's strict eyes searched James glass blue ones, trying to find his true meaning. "Fine. Just fine. You two shall be at dinner tonight, I presume?"
The elder of the two Mr. Withersmiths nodded and stood to take Miss Bellmen's hand. "Quiet so, my lady. Now, I wanted to discuss a picnic idea that came to me last night in a dream…Come along, let us go talk with my Lucy about it."
Once the two chaperones were out of sight, they became out of mind. Lottie jumped into James' awaiting arms, planting a loving kiss on his clothed chest.
"Lottie, my love, did you ask my father to distract Miss Bellmen earlier on our walk?" James asked, smoothing a hand through her soft hair. He loved when they could just stand together like this, close.
Lottie let out a small laugh. "That is a secret I shall never disclose. Come, let us walk through the trees and join in the hermit life for a few moments."
And that, is exactly what they did. They found themselves a new spot to lie together upon the backside of a hill at the edge of the manor. James stripped himself of his waistcoat and rolled the sleeves of his shirt up, laying upon the grass. Lottie laid beside him, lying her head on his chest.
"You know your father tried to marry me off to three other young men today? Well, he did. Samuel Chapel, Christophe Everett, and another lad - I believe his name was Charles."
"The footman?" James asked, knowing only of his young friend who had been born into the Withersmith service.
"Mmhmm. You father tried to tell me there were many other, more suitable men out there. Of course, I'd never think that. I mean, once I found you I knew there was no sense in looking at other suitors ever again. I love you, you know? Anyways, he tried to convince me that you were not good enough for me. Of course," she paused, kissing his chest quickly as he continued to play with her hair, while thinking up a way to get his father out of their business.
"I think you are the most suitable man in England. That's what your mother said this morning after breakfast when we went to the drawing room. Miss Bellman disagreed and I reprimanded her on that fact. She was not, and knew she should not, be rude to people we are guests to."
Lottie, looked up a James for a moment, getting lost in his eyes - even if just for a moment, which was the best place to be in the world. In his arms, in his eyes.
"I love you so much. Too much really. And I am afraid I am growing attached." He stood up, causing Lottie to roll off of him and onto the soft grass of the earth. "Come, inside. I shall see you at dinner."
"Wait!" Lottie cried, much louder than she meant to. She took his face in her hands and smashed their lips together. They shared a long, passionate kiss before breaking apart for air.
"Dinner, Lottie. I will see you there, my sweet."
James ran off, sprinting to the house and busting through the doors, scaring half the staff. He ignored the women's shrieks and the sound of things being dropped and continued his run up the stairs. He busted through the large wooden doors of his father's office and yelled out:
"I want to marry Lottie!"
Before, he realized who all was in the room. Mr. Withersmith, coughed to cover up his hysterics. Mrs. Withersmith looked completely and utterly overwhelmed with happiness. And, Miss Bellmen looked completely and utterly overwhelmed with shock and anger.
"Mr. Withersmith, is this your way of properly asking permission to marry my charge. Because if it is, this is a terrible way of going about it. I am horribly offended at your actions and forbid you wed my Lottie."
"Now come, Miss Bellmen," James' father said, keeping his laughter inside him. "They are young and in love. Don't you wish dear Lottie the best?"
Miss Bellmen's sneer gently faded away and gentle tears pricked at her eyes. "Yes. Yes I do."
A soft silence sat atop the room, knocking the breath into one with its powerful feelings of contentment and gladness. "Well, then…Miss Bellmen, I must apologize and ask you for Miss Maple's hand in marriage."
Miss Bellman smiled at the young boy who was knelt in front of her chair and let out a small laugh, not bothering to hide her tears. "I give you my blessing, boy."
And so, that night at dinner, Lottie was surprised by an engagement proposal from James. So surprised in fact, that she screamed, causing one of the footmen to try and catch her drink she threw out of her hand. He did catch the glass, however the wine was a lost cause.
And so, James and Lottie were to be married in exactly two months, for the wedding had already been set in motion. The adults had know for sure Lottie and James' engagements would lead to this.
You loved me 'cause I'm I thought that I was you touch me for a little while
And all my fragile strength is gone.
James laid in the grass of the field, propped up my his forearm to face a standing Miss Lottie. They had snuck away from their chaperon Lady Bellmen who was probably out looking for them by now. Lottie leaned down into the grass and rolled around for a moment, before suddenly getting a very good but very bad idea.
"Mr. Withersmith, would you care to go swimming?" she asked, innocently as she could.
James, a twenty-one year old boy with twenty-one year old testosterone, had to hold himself back from stripping his clothes off and throwing himself into the stream to wait on Miss Lottie. No, instead he just nodded and smiled, standing to take her hand.
She let go of his hand, taking off her top dress and wearing only her shift and corset. She jumped readily into the stream. Coming up for air, she looked wittingly at James.
"Well, aren't you coming in?"
James, undressed himself of his shoes and vest and jumped into the water with her. They swam around for a little while. James had known it was completely and utterly improper all along, but, she - the innocent girl who was four years younger than him, thought only of pure fun.
And in this, Miss Bellmen found her reason to postpone the engagement process. Lottie had never seen her as mad as she was that day, when she found them swimming together and splashing each other in the stream. She immediately had Lottie taken to her room and locked away until dinner.
Miss Bellmen found James' mother and father and immediately told them of the inappropriate events that their son had been inducing to her charge. James knew it wasn't him inducing the actions, but he did know his intentions and thoughts when she jumped into the stream were much less innocent than hers were.
As dinner came, Lottie, accompanied by her chaperone descended the stairs. She sat across from James and, as he heard, her punishment was being forbade to speak. She took in small portions of her three course meal quietly, only staring at her food as the adults talked among themselves.
However, James did not join in their wondrous interactions, for he was worried with dear Lottie. So worried that he could barely eat. He looked at Lottie, pleading with her in his mind to look at him, as if the power of love might convey his message to her.
James was excited when he saw her pull her head up, but a bit put out to see her turn her head to her chaperone and whisper a, "May I be excused."
Miss Bellmen nodded and went back to her conversation. All the men stood up as Lottie stood from the table. James was sad to see her go, but knew there was nothing he could do for her.
Christophe stood up quickly, surprising everyone at the table. "Miss Maple, if you will, allow me to escort you to your chambers. I was planning to turn in early tonight, because of an awful headache I have been havin'."
"Do you wish for me to call on a doctor, Mr. Lefroy?"
"No, but thank you madam," Christophe replied, charming both Mrs. Withersmith and Miss Bellmen with his thick Scottish accent.
Lottie took Mr. Lefroy's arm as they both walked out of the room.
Set me free, leave me be.
I don't want to fall another moment into your I am and I stand so tall
Just the way I'm supposed to you're on to me and all over me.
"I'll be back soon, love. Charles and I are only going hunting for tonight. I shall return early morning tomorrow," James whispered, kissing his love - forbidden, in the early morning light. She wrapped herself around him, holding him close.
"Today was when we were to wed. But, now it is two months away. I can't wait to months, and I can barely wait a day. Come back soon."
He gave her a long, passionately beautiful kiss and promised to be back very soon.
Little did he know he wouldn't come back for five years. When his master would let him go to the human world.
He was now a vampire.
I live here on my knees as I
Try to make you see that you're
Everything I think I need here on the ground.
James stepped up to the door and knocked gently. A young maid opened the door with a young footman by her side. That's when James noticed who the footman was.
He remembered me too, gasping in surprise at my appearance. "Does a Miss Lottie Maple still live here?" James asked, hiding his surprise to see his old friend working for Miss Bellmen with a clear of his throat.
"No sir," the young maid stuttered out. James didn't recognize her, but she did recognize him. James had no fear of the both of them. He knew Charles would keep the maid quiet for him. Even if Charles didn't know what truly happened that night, he did know that James was not supposed to be alive. And, that his ability to be alive wasn't something he would search out - afraid of the answers.
"She lives just down the road and to the right. The largest manor on the block. She should be out right now, she usually is at this time of day, in the fields of the manor up front," the maid finished. James couldn't help but notice Charles' hands that held the maid's petite waist in a protective manor.
"Thank you, sir, madam."
James made it to the large manor in less than a few seconds. And sure as the young maid had said, there he stood picking flowers from the gardens of the estate. She looked even more beautiful than he could remember, if that were possible. She had on a long working dress over a white tunic dress, her hair falling down her back in beautiful curls, two pieces pulled off her face as always.
James stepped onto the grounds, coming from the forest. A branch broke under his feet, though it was on purpose. Lottie looked around, gasping in shock at the figure standing in front of her.
"J-James…"she gasped. She looked faint, as James saw her. She couldn't believe her eyes. This couldn't be her James. No, it couldn't. For her James had died over five years ago. "James…I-I…"
"Is it really you? It can't be…can it?"
He nodded, slowly walking towards her, taking her into his arms. She laid her head on his cold chest and began to weep.
A petite little girl, with her hair in little ringlets of blonde, came running out of the back door of the large manor and came running at Lottie enthusiastically.
"Momma!" She screamed, crashing into her side and giggling at herself.
James knew immediately who the father of this child was. And it frightened him. His dearest love not only lived, but had a lovely companion - his daughter.
"Lucy," she whispered, wiping a few tears from her beautiful face and looked down at the little girl who had been named for his mother. "What do you need, sweetheart?"
"Daddy's home!"
James froze, anger filling him. This child knew not of her true father who stood right here in front of her. She knew a false one, who only took his place during his time of absence.
"Lucy. Go back inside. Now." She turned away from the skipping child and looked at James, scared. "I-I thought you w-were dead, James."
Suddenly an all too familiar Scottish accent rang in his ears.
"Lottie, love, are you out in the garden?"
Still looking at James she called back with an affirmative.
"Well, do you wish me to help you, my sweet?" He asked again, getting closer and closer by the minute. "Little Lucy said you were out here was a strange man she didn't recognize. Are you okay, my love? Haven't you - God save the King."
James stepped closer to his former best friend angrily. "How dare you, Christophe! How dare you still my fiancée, and my only love from me when I was unable to protect her. How could you?"
Christophe stepped closer, shocked, yet wanting to protect his family from James who was ill-tempered anyways - and being given bad news would be must worse in his temper. He look a crying Lottie into his arms and she buried her face in his chest.
James looked at the young lawyer, waiting on an answer.
"We didn't know, James…We thought-"
"I know," James interrupted angrily. "You betrayed me. You betrayed my trust. How dare you!"
Christophe stepped in front of Lottie protectively. "James. I think it best if you leave for a moment and return for dinner so we may talk as men - not coward boys. I understand you temperament, but I will not apologize for my actions. Please, go."
Controlling the strength of his arm, James threw a sucker punch right square on his nose. Even though James had barely touched him, his vampire strength threw Christophe onto the ground, his nose bleeding.
Lottie cried out in fear, looking at James, who suddenly had disappeared. Little did she know, he was standing just a few feet away in the forest behind their house.
Lottie collapsed atop her husband, gently taking his face in her hands. "Christophe. Christophe, please."
Christophe moved slightly, moaning quietly before opening his bright blue eyes to his beautiful wife. "His lack propriety is absurd," he whispered, a smile seeping through his blood cover mouth.
Lottie smiled through her tears and nodded, her hair falling as a curtain around their faces. "When did propriety ever pay you any mind?" She let out a small, sort of a laugh, though tears still streamed down her face.
"Well, I guess those expensive boxing lessons were a waste," he whispered, trying to sit up. Lottie held his head in her lap as she called for a few footmen to help her carry her beloved husband inside. The came quickly, hoisting him up even as protested the he could walk himself. Lottie smiled, kissing his forehead lightly and following them halfway to the house, but turning back around.
She ran back over to where James had been standing for a long while. Lottie walked through the thick foliage and looked around, trying not to trip over something.
"James, please. I just…I'm sorry. I-"
James cut her off, grabbing her in his arms and pressing her against the trees, kissing her with everything he had. She moaned into his mouth as he told her how much she had missed him.
"Please, Lottie. Come back to me. I shall give you time to decide. But, if you say yes, we will run away together and live together forever."
Lottie backed away, almost tripping over several branches. She realized what she had done. "No, no, no…I-I…I'm married, James. To your dear Christophe. Please, James. I cannot."
James pulled her back in, kissing her once more before releasing her to the manor. She ran off, yet kept looking back to see if he was still much there. But, he was not. In fact he was now very much gone through into the forest to hunt down someone to feast upon.
Lottie closed the door with a slam, seeing little Lucy standing in at the piano. "Momma, will you play?"
Lottie nodded, smiling and sitting upon the stool to the pianoforte. Christophe could hear the lovely playing of his beautiful wife downstairs and knew she was finally safe and their troubles were behind them.
But you're neither friend nor foe
Though I can't seem to let you go
Later that night, after all two of their children had been sent to bed, the lovely young couple enjoyed a walk out onto the balcony off of their bedchambers. Lottie bit her full bottom lip anxiously and gently played with Christophe's long fingers.
"Christophe, I have to tell you. James and I shared a moment we should not have, for not of your knowledge in the forest, he kissed me."
Christophe sucked in a breath, but did not take his hand away from the girl's soft fingers that now worked at his arm, under his dressing robe.
"I know," he said. "I mean, I didn't know, but something in me knew he would - eventually, at that. But, I am not upset with you, dear Lottie. You love him."
"I love you more."
He smiled. "I know."
A long moment passed, until Christophe pulled his hand away and walked to the edge of the balcony. "How can you, of all, dispose of yourself without returned affections? I know that you will always love him - and I know that you do love me, but you…You didn't love me. Not at the wedding you didn't. And you knew…you knew that I would have waited for you, did you not? I didn't want you of false pretensions. Why didn't you tell me you were unprepared?"
Lottie stuttered, quietly sad, "Because I didn't want to loose you. A-and I was certain I would…I do love you. I was j-just-"
She was cut off by his lips, so eager on hers. "Silly girl," he said in between kisses. "I would have waited for you until the world stopped spinning." He kissed her once more. "I loved you when you still loved him. I am yours. I am yours heart and soul."
"Please, I need you," she whispered. "You have to be the strong one, because I'm tired of doing it all myself. Love me, Christophe. Love me, please."
"I do. Forever." he kissed her, overwhelming her with his passion. The quickly made their way to the bedroom, never letting go of each other's lips.
Lottie knew her answer to James' question.
One thing that I still know is that you're keeping me
Down
"I can't leave with you," she said, loudly over the rain. "But, I do love you. I always will."
James took her into his arms in understanding and kissed her immediately. Lottie knew this was it. This was when she would have to let go of James forever - again. So she kissed him with all the pent up love she truly had for him, how much she wished it was him she would return to after a moment.
"God, I love you," he cried, knowing tears couldn't come truly. He laid his head into her neck, overwhelmed with the lovely scent of her he hadn't noticed until this moment.
"I love you so much, James," she whimpered. In his passion, he tore into her neck, quenching his forever thirst with her succulent taste. He couldn't stop himself. He wanted her, more and more, pulling her closer and closer, trying somehow to be more with her.
Suddenly he let her go, looking up to kiss her lips - unaware of his previous actions.
"L-Lottie?" he whispered in obvious pain. "Lottie, wake up! Wake up!" He shouted, shaking her lifeless body harshly. "N-No, L-Lottie, no…" His body rocked with sobs of tears he would never release. She was dead. His true love was dead. Lottie Maple was dead.
And he had killed her.
He sunk down against the trunk of the tree opposite her. He gripped at his hair, ripping it at its ends. He growled at himself, wishing he had the power to rip himself apart, somehow kill himself. But, this he had already tried so much. And he could not figure out why it was vampire could not commit suicide.
He waited a few days, knowing that Christophe had finally come home from his trip away on business. He carried her bluish body deeper into the wild and made her death look like an animal attack. James had to leave immediately, he couldn't bare to have his lover etched in his mind as a lifeless corpse.
You're on to me, on to me, and all over…
One hundred years later, in 1918, he found a young vampire who had taken up residence in an insane asylum. He had fallen in love with a young girl who was there because of her visions and James could not stand the fact that the man was going to change her to be his mate.
James knew he would fail.
Two years after he killed the man, James found a girl who looked so much like his Lottie, when she turned around, he swore it was her - and that maybe she had had just the amount of blood to change. He ran to her, to be surprised by a beautiful female vampire.
"Hello, I'm Victoria," she hissed, pushing him to the wall.
"James," he said, running a finger through her red curls, knowing this is exactly who he needed as his mate. Someone who looked like Lottie. Someone he could pretend was Lottie, at least in his mind.
Victoria loved the way he looked and his attitude towards others - or at least what it seemed to be, take what you want. Even if it goes by force or death. And that is what she needed. She had dad issues and just needed a distraction. James was a perfect distraction.
Victoria worshipped James, always craving his approval. He barely paid her attention, at least in the sense of love other than sex. He loved her when they had sex. Victoria ignored his calling out of "My Lottie!" during these fiery encounters. She saw it as a lovely nickname, something it most definitely was not.
James missed his dear Lottie more than he would admit to himself or anyone else for that matter. The image of her, so loving a trusting, as she told him she loved him and that she didn't want him to ever forget her, to love her until death, as she would. She told him she couldn't be with him, but that she loved him so much. And he had destroyed her, completely killed her.
This image had been well repressed when they had first come upon Laurent, but was shoved back into his mentality as they approached the Cullen family in the field that stormy day.
James would not let anyone have what he could not. Especially Edward Cullen.
Even as they began to tear him to shreds, he knew he had done Edward a service. Change her now, or let her die. He knew Edward heard his voice as he stilled in his movements to suck James' venom from her arm. But he shook his head quickly and began to drink from her arm.
James would never know what happened to Edward and Bella.
All he knew now was Lottie. He was lost her sea of red hair as they burned him. I'm finally yours, Lottie. I'm finally good enough again.
I love you.
Something always brings me back to you
It never takes to long...
Gravity - Sara Bareilles
A/N: I am so in love with this version of James I can barely stand it! Its Lottie the most precious thing? Anyways, Lottie's dress at their meeting in the woods is the one Kiera Knightly wears in Pride and Prejudice when she is swinging and then again when Mr. Bingley proposes to Jane. Also, Mr. Christophe LeFroy is James McAvoy and his lovely Scottish accent - but his image from Becoming Jane.
I hope you love, love, loved it. Happy Holidays. Happy New Year!
Fish and Chips (and Sparkling Grape Juice!)
-Alice!