Remember the break-up between Mamoru and Usagi in the anime? Well, I've read so many versions of it, that I decided to make up my own. I've been in similar places, and I think I might understand what they're feeling. Oh, did I mention this was a songfic? Only the song hasn't started yet! ^^;
Disclaimers: Mamoru, Usagi, and most of the others belong to Takeuchi Naoko ^^ Where You Are is a song sung by Jessica Simpson & Nick Lachey. Mm-k, well, read on ^~.
(The parentheses mean they're thinking...)
~Where You Are~
~A Prologue~
Email: Firefly_Tomoe@hotmail.com
Inevitable tears streamed down her rosy cheeks, while other clear teardrops framed her young innocent face. Her long thin arms were indignantly crossed as she barred herself from falling over in nausea and anxiety. She was shaking fiercely, from the roots of her blond hair to her fingertips, with mixed feelings of immense hurt, raging anger, and overwhelming curiosity as to why he was doing this. (Wasn't this never-ending love? The one thing in her life that would last forever?)
She gazed down at the floor in crushing pain, and was only barely aware that a scarlet stain had appeared where her knees had fallen to. She gasped, having been never used to this sort of pain. The 'surprise' announcement he'd just given had not only scarred her within, but on the outside as well. Rising on the palms of her hands, she slowly managed to stand up on her weak, throbbing knees. Tilting her head in the next instant, she flashed him a look of pure disbelief.
Him who had promised so much, and given so little.
Him who had saved her from utter depression before, had just thrown her in the black pit again.
Him who she had spent so much time with, until it seemed as if their very souls were binded again, split
them apart in that instant.
(So this is ultimate sadness. Why Mamo-chan? Part of me is dying right now, right in front of your eyes, but you can't see it.)
She searched fervently in her heart, trying to figure out what it was that she had done wrong...done to deserve this. After a few minutes of deafening silence, she was tired of thinking. Tired of displaying her emotions to a person who could care less about her in every possible way.
With a composed indifferent wave, her eyes swept away from her destined, and she walked, as straight and as proud as could be, into the night.
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.
"Usagi, understand. I've found someone else, and honestly, I can't be with you anymore. Go, go and find your true love. Whoever said that thing about 'destiny' was wrong...our lives aren't etched out in concrete or written in stone!"
With that, he heaved a sigh, trying to shut out all the emotions in him. All the voices that were saying that his spoken words hadn't a ring of truth...he was speaking from the sensible mind, the mind that had concocted this made-up person. As if anyone could take his Odango Atama's place.
His thoughts were from deep within his heart.
(I love you, Usako! You mean the world to me! I want us together forever, just like you do!)
He almost thought of saying them aloud, as a way to repent for his horrible mistake. To explain that the only one in his life would be her, and her eternally. To see her face light up with that merry look once again.
But those dreams. Those dreams that had waken him up every night were now driving his future away.
(It would be selfish to keep her with me,) he thought miserably. (Maybe this way she can find someone who'll take my place in her heart.)
Just thinking about that possibility tore him up inside.
Actually, he didn't need that to tear him up. He saw Usagi's face turn from joyful to see him to a sinking cry of realization. It wrenched his heart to watch her that way. Outside, though, his icy blue eyes showed a different story. In comparison to her tousled looks, Mamoru still retained his perfect calm.
He stepped towards her, wanting to reach out and hold her, to guard her from all of this.
(But now I'm the cause of the pain,) was the thought that ran through his blurry mind. (I can't protect her...now she'll run to someone else for comfort.)
He stepped back.
When she left, he let a tear of sorrow escape him.
In a soft, barely audible whisper, he said to the wind, "I love you, Odango Atama. Maybe one day you'll forgive me."
Picking up his bag, he dragged himself away.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Review it, please! ^^ Maybe I can finish the songfic before school starts. Love y'all! Especially the people who review this! =P Sayonara!
Yours truly,
~Firefly_Tomoe~
Disclaimers: Mamoru, Usagi, and most of the others belong to Takeuchi Naoko ^^ Where You Are is a song sung by Jessica Simpson & Nick Lachey. Mm-k, well, read on ^~.
(The parentheses mean they're thinking...)
~Where You Are~
~A Prologue~
Email: Firefly_Tomoe@hotmail.com
Inevitable tears streamed down her rosy cheeks, while other clear teardrops framed her young innocent face. Her long thin arms were indignantly crossed as she barred herself from falling over in nausea and anxiety. She was shaking fiercely, from the roots of her blond hair to her fingertips, with mixed feelings of immense hurt, raging anger, and overwhelming curiosity as to why he was doing this. (Wasn't this never-ending love? The one thing in her life that would last forever?)
She gazed down at the floor in crushing pain, and was only barely aware that a scarlet stain had appeared where her knees had fallen to. She gasped, having been never used to this sort of pain. The 'surprise' announcement he'd just given had not only scarred her within, but on the outside as well. Rising on the palms of her hands, she slowly managed to stand up on her weak, throbbing knees. Tilting her head in the next instant, she flashed him a look of pure disbelief.
Him who had promised so much, and given so little.
Him who had saved her from utter depression before, had just thrown her in the black pit again.
Him who she had spent so much time with, until it seemed as if their very souls were binded again, split
them apart in that instant.
(So this is ultimate sadness. Why Mamo-chan? Part of me is dying right now, right in front of your eyes, but you can't see it.)
She searched fervently in her heart, trying to figure out what it was that she had done wrong...done to deserve this. After a few minutes of deafening silence, she was tired of thinking. Tired of displaying her emotions to a person who could care less about her in every possible way.
With a composed indifferent wave, her eyes swept away from her destined, and she walked, as straight and as proud as could be, into the night.
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.
"Usagi, understand. I've found someone else, and honestly, I can't be with you anymore. Go, go and find your true love. Whoever said that thing about 'destiny' was wrong...our lives aren't etched out in concrete or written in stone!"
With that, he heaved a sigh, trying to shut out all the emotions in him. All the voices that were saying that his spoken words hadn't a ring of truth...he was speaking from the sensible mind, the mind that had concocted this made-up person. As if anyone could take his Odango Atama's place.
His thoughts were from deep within his heart.
(I love you, Usako! You mean the world to me! I want us together forever, just like you do!)
He almost thought of saying them aloud, as a way to repent for his horrible mistake. To explain that the only one in his life would be her, and her eternally. To see her face light up with that merry look once again.
But those dreams. Those dreams that had waken him up every night were now driving his future away.
(It would be selfish to keep her with me,) he thought miserably. (Maybe this way she can find someone who'll take my place in her heart.)
Just thinking about that possibility tore him up inside.
Actually, he didn't need that to tear him up. He saw Usagi's face turn from joyful to see him to a sinking cry of realization. It wrenched his heart to watch her that way. Outside, though, his icy blue eyes showed a different story. In comparison to her tousled looks, Mamoru still retained his perfect calm.
He stepped towards her, wanting to reach out and hold her, to guard her from all of this.
(But now I'm the cause of the pain,) was the thought that ran through his blurry mind. (I can't protect her...now she'll run to someone else for comfort.)
He stepped back.
When she left, he let a tear of sorrow escape him.
In a soft, barely audible whisper, he said to the wind, "I love you, Odango Atama. Maybe one day you'll forgive me."
Picking up his bag, he dragged himself away.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Review it, please! ^^ Maybe I can finish the songfic before school starts. Love y'all! Especially the people who review this! =P Sayonara!
Yours truly,
~Firefly_Tomoe~