"Your hand opens and closes, opens and closes. If it were always a fist or always stretched open, you would be paralyzed. Your deepest presence is in every small contracting and expanding, the two as beautifully balanced and coordinated as birds' wings."
-Rumi
"Master Kathari, you know why we have called you here," Mace Windu's voice sounded calm and strong, filling the chamber of the Jedi Council.
"I do, Master Windu, it is undoubtedly related to the birth of my son, Kole," Cado tried to sound stoic in return, hoping his voice did not give way to his racing pulse and muddled mind. Between the loss of his wife still fresh in his mind and the wails of his newborn son still screaming in his ears, Cado could hardly process the scene before him. Though he had played this scene in his mind repeatedly since the beginning of Lilya's pregnancy, facing the Council still caused his hands to sweat and shake.
"Not surprised by this, you are," Yoda noted. "This deception runs deep."
"Long has the Council known of my beliefs and of my affairs, though you may have turned a blind eye," Cado could hardly hear his own words over the loud thump thump of his pulse in his ears. "I have found peace and fortitude in my love for Lilya. A pain runs through me because of her loss."
"We are sorry for your loss. But you have violated every aspect of the Jedi Code," Mace Windu's could not hide the disdain from his voice, his disapproval of Cado's choices standing like a chasm between them. Yet the words rolled off Cado's back, the negativity passing over him as a heavy wave passes through the ocean.
"I will not turn my back on my own son," Cado said carefully, finding Windu's stare. "He is a gift, born of a love and trust so unbreakable and precious that it has allowed life to flourish. But I also understand that you can no longer allow me to exist within the confines of the Jedi Order."
"Attachment leads to the Dark Side," Yoda cautioned. "Allow children, the Order does not. Jeopardizes the safety of everyone, this attachment does."
"No, Master," Cado replied thoughtfully. "It is not attachment that leads to the Dark Side, it is an obsession with control and an inability to accept change that takes us down that path. I stand by what I have said before. To fully understand the Dark Side, one must know hate. To fully understand the Light Side of the Force, one must know love."
"These are not the beliefs of Jedi, Cado," Master Windu hissed. "We choose serenity, not passion."
"Passion is but a small part of the love that can be shared between two people," Cado reflected on his tender moments with Lilya. The warmth of her laugh, the calm of her touch, and the way she challenged him to care fully and with intention. "The love I bore for Lilya has made me a better Jedi. It has taught me more about care and compassion than any mission could."
"You are no Jedi," Saesee Tinn said sadly, his eyes avoiding Cado's. "You have turned your back on us."
"No, Saesee," Cado felt the hurt in his words piercing his soul. "The Jedi Order has turned its back on me because it knows I cannot turn my back on my family."
"The Code forbids-" Saesee began, looking from under his brow towards Cado.
"Master Tinn, if this is my last audience with the Council, I must say my peace," Cado felt his hands grow calm, his words and belief bringing him composure. "The Order chooses a tradition that binds their minds, preventing them from experiencing the perfect balance. The life of a Jedi, a life of total denial of one's own nature, does not allow one to fully understand the living Force. You must allow yourself to become part of the Universe and all that it provides us with. Before the Wars of Light and Dark, our predecessors, the Jed'aii, understood this balance. The planet of Tython flourished in balance and so should we in turn. I will not apologize for a love that has made me a better comrade, a more empathetic diplomat, and a more giving servant. I have brought nothing but love to all I do, and I have embraced my experience with all my soul. If this ostracizes me from the Order, then so be it. But I cannot apologize."
Saesee slumped backwards to show Cado what defeat looked like. He could see the exact moment his friend gave up on him.
"Raise your son away from the Order, you must," Yoda replied. "Stripped of your title, and all association with the Jedi, you are."
"So it seems it must be," Cado replied. "Though I leave an exile, as one who has broken the Code, I humbly ask the Council allow me only one thing: to maintain my lightsaber. Through my years of service, I have made many enemies in the name of the Order and the Republic. To strip me of a weapon as connected to me as my own limbs would leave me defenseless, and I have to protect my son."
"Absolutely not," Windu replied. "The lightsaber is the weapon of a Jedi, and you are no Jedi. Not anymore."
"And if I swear to never use it, save to protect my son?"
"Under no circumstance-"
"Keep your lightsaber you should," Yoda interrupted Windu. "Leave as an exile you do, but on the Light Side you remain. Only to defend your son, should it be used."
Cado felt a wash of relief.
"I will return to Pantora, to my home world," Cado replied. "Should the Council ever need use of me, I will be there ready to assist in anyway. I bid no negativity towards any of you, and thank you for all you have taught me. I will do my best to always bring Light to all those I meet."
"You are dismissed," Windu's words were each poignant with contempt.
"Very well, Masters. Goodbye," Cado bowed, removing his Jedi robe as he left the room for the last time.