PPROLOGUE

Jason Gideon was finally at peace with himself. Nothing relaxed a man like a good day's worth of fishing and a beautiful sunset, he thought as he made the two mile hike back to his campsite from the river where he'd spent all day, alternately fishing and reading. It had been a good day, and now he was ready to fry his catch, open a new bottle of wine, and enjoy the rest of the evening with a good book. Vonnegut, perhaps.

He surprised himself by detouring down the path that would lead past his site and stopped at Dave's cabin. Not that he expected the other profiler to be there—Dave rarely was, these days. Not since returning to the Bureau to take Jason's own spot.

And it wasn't like Dave ever knew Jason was still in the area. Jason never stopped by to say hello, or to check on his once-close friend. But it comforted Jason to know that the possibility existed for him to connect with that former life, if only for a moment or two. So he often stood watching from a hidden path near the front of the property. Just wondering if he'd ever get the nerve to move close enough to speak to the other profiler. There would be less pressure with Dave—he'd not been there for that fateful case by a rail track.

He paused when he realized someone occupied the front porch of Dave's cabin. And it wasn't Dave. Jason lifted his binoculars to his eyes, focusing on the darkheaded woman sitting on the wooden swing. She was thin, beautiful, and if he wasn't mistaken—Agent Emily Prentiss.

What was she doing at Dave's cabin?

She rocked the swing slightly with one bare foot, then pulled it back up under the quilt she had wrapped around herself. Her head she rested against the back of the swing. Jason focused on her face once more, this time catching the faint bruising on her brow, the slight swollen look to her bottom lip. Someone had hurt her, and that angered him. He took a step closer, but stopped. He didn't want to disturb whatever solitude she'd found on Dave's porch.

Why Dave's? Was there something going on between the two of them? What he knew of the woman, it wouldn't surprise him if she had caught Dave's interest. He'd long thought—since a trip to Guantanamo Bay—that she was a fascinating woman. Would it really be so surprising if the other men of the BAU felt the same way?

If so, why did she appear to be there alone?

Didn't she know the type of things that could happen to a woman staying in the woods alone? Surely she did. Hadn't she been right there with him in Idaho when those brothers were shooting people for sport?

As if she'd read his mind, she stood and moved to stare off the edge of the porch at the long winding drive that lead to the county access road. It was then that Jason heard the car pulling up. He jerked his binoculars in that direction.

He watched as the dark sedan parked and a tall, darkhaired man dressed in khakis and a button down jerked out of the vehicle. He walked up to Prentiss with jerky, agitated steps.

Jason moved closer. What was he doing here?

Prentiss moved, her body tightening in a way Jason didn't need the binoculars to see. It was obvious to the seasoned profiler that she hadn't expected Hotch to show up. Jason wished he could hear what was being said between them. He moved closer.

"Dammit, Emily, you should have told me where you were going!" Hotch suddenly yelled, and Jason felt his face move into a surprised expression. Hotch rarely ever yelled, and never at a woman. And since when did he call her Emily? Was something more going on between them? He dropped the binoculars to focus on the left hand Hotch kept fisting. The wedding ring his friend had worn for years was missing. "I was worried! I had to find out from Reid that you'd taken a few days off!"

"I'm sorry, sir. I didn't think what I did would matter that much to you." Jason found himself taking a step back from the venom in her normally modulated tones. Emily Prentiss was very, very angry with the man in front of her. Jason couldn't help but wonder why.

"Not matter? Dammit, sweetheart! I think you know better than that!" Hotch took two steps forward, only to stop when the woman held up a staying hand. Jason was now burning with curiosity. What exactly had happened between the two of them since he'd left the BAU. Hell, what had happened to Hotch and Hayley?

He never thought he'd see the day when Hotch would be looking at another woman with such naked…longing…on his face. And it definitely had never occurred to him that Hotch would be looking at Emily Prentiss that way.

"Do I?" Emily challenged. She took a few steps closer to Hotch. Jason wondered if they realized they looked like two magnets drawing inevitably closer to one another. "Not one word. You didn't say even one word, Hotch. What was I supposed to think?"

"I didn't know what to say. Couldn't say anything, or I'd be carrying you out of there." Hotch yelled suddenly. Jason stepped back, nearly tripping over a log. He'd never heard Hotch yell at anyone in quite that manner. The younger man was obviously completely on edge. Jason wondered just how close he was to losing it. "That would have went over real well with half the damned Colorado field office, not to mention the rest of the team!"

"And that would have been so horrible? If Derek and Dave and the others knew?" Emily bit out, yelling back just as loud.

These two were the two people on earth Jason never would have pictured yelling at each other in the midst of a domestic quarrel. And it definitely was domestic. And had been for quite a while, Jason suspected. Their manner with each other was one of a long relationship, though not an easy relationship. And if he was correct, Emily was demanding an open acknowledgement.

Jason knew the woman was the kind who valued open honesty, especially with those she cared about. Prentiss wouldn't be an easy woman to love, either, he suspected. She'd demand a man strip himself bare.

Hotch had never been the kind to expose himself that freely, so he could completely understand the strife they were apparently facing.

"Sweetheart…" Hotch held a hand up, taking two more inevitable steps toward her.

Jason watched as she backed away. "Don't, Hotch. I'm tired of it. I can't take it."

Hotch visibly flinched at her words. "Emily, please. You know it's not like that."

"What is it then? I'm tired of hiding, Hotch. I want, need, and deserve more than to be a dirty little secret. The whole time I was in there, I knew you were listening. And I knew you sent Dave in for a reason. But it's been a whole week, and you've not said one word to me. Just buried your head in paperwork. You have got to stop hiding from things!" Emily said in such a low tone Jason struggled to make out her words. Her voice suddenly rose. "And stop with the guilt! You're as bad as Reid! Neither one of you is at fault for what happened. Cyrus is. And me. I'm the one who blew my cover when he was going to shoot Reid. And dammit, I'd do it again! What I can't do again is watch you keep pulling away. Hiding."

She turned and walked back up the steps. Hotch stepped after her, his hands dropping to grasp her shoulders.

Jason watched as her head bowed, and her shoulders slumped. She shrugged Hotch's grip away. "Don't. I'm tired of being a secret. I deserve better than that. Why are you even here?"

Jason found himself nodding. Emily Prentiss did deserve more from a man, but he could certainly understand Hotch wanting to keep his private life separate from the BAU.

"I'm here because I can't not be, Emily." Hotch said, he followed her, a sureness in his movements now. Jason was struck by the naked longing on Hotch's face as he looked down at his subordinate.

As far as Jason knew, the two hadn't even liked each other for most of the time she'd been at the BAU. He'd thought he understood it—Prentiss was adamant about hating politics, yet Hotch had been forced on numerous occasions to play those very games. And he did it well. Jason had always suspected Emily's distrust of the unit chief came from that very thing.

But to see them now, it made a different kind of sense to Jason. Hotch had been married—rocky—but married, when Emily had transferred in. She'd been defensive, but eager to prove herself. And Hotch hadn't exactly been too welcoming. When Jason had left the BAU the two had barely talked, and rarely worked together. No, he'd always kept her with him, Jason remembered. Or he and Hotch had left her with Morgan.

If Jason had been honest, it would have surprised him much less to see Emily having a relationship with Derek—or even Dave—before picturing her with Hotch. But the more he thought of it, the more it made some sort of sense to him. They were both private people, both prided themselves on being calm and in control, both were familiar with politics, both were protectors of those they cared about. So yes, it did make a strange sort of sense to Jason.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Emily demanded, in a defeated tone. "That you don't want to be here? Well, I don't want you here. I came up here to get away, Hotch. To have some time to think. To make some decisions about what I want from now on."

"And what have you decided?" Jason wondered if Emily had caught the underlying note of fear in Hotch's words, too. "Emily?"

"I don't know. And I hate that, I really do. I always have a plan for my life, Hotch. And you've taken that away from me, now. I don't know if I can keep doing this, that. I just don't know." Emily admitted; her body tensed when the sound of another vehicle was heard in the drive. "Who's that?"

"I don't know." Hotch said. Jason watched as he instinctively put himself between her and the drive. Jason watched through the binoculars as a dark, standard issue Bureau SUV pulled in, followed by a dark sedan.

He watched bemused as the rest of the team he'd left behind piled out. Garcia, that wonderfully colorful woman Gideon had come to greatly admire, bustled around the front of the sedan headed toward the passenger side. The door opened and a heavily pregnant blonde emerged. Jason smiled, seeing the face of the sweet little media liaison. So JJ was going to be a momma, he dropped the binoculars to her hand, searching for a wedding band. He frowned when he didn't see one. JJ deserved better than to be a single mother.

Dave called up to the pair by the steps. "Hotch, what are you doing here?"

"I drove up to check on Prentiss." Hotch said, in a cool tone that didn't betray the fact that he and the woman in question had been shouting at each other just seconds before they'd pulled in. "What are you all doing up here?"

"Checking on Emily." Reid said, struggling with an awkward bag of groceries he'd pulled from the back of the SUV.

"Not us." Garcia said, hugging the dark-haired woman. "JJ and I came to party, slumber-style. Met up with the rest of this posse at a gas station where we stopped to let JJ pee for the one hundred and eightieth time."

"You try having a watermelon sitting on your bladder." JJ called from where she stood near the porch. "Speaking of which, I gotta go!"

Jason found himself smiling at their exchange. God, he had missed them! He hadn't realized how much until seeing them rally around Prentiss, who'd apparently caught the wrong end of a case.

"Hotch, man, you could have told us you planned on driving up here, we would have made room in the SUV." Morgan said, as he moved to hug Prentiss. He lingered with his arms around her, back toward Hotch.

Jason wondered if he was the only one who caught the way Hotch's expression darkened as Emily clung to the darker man.

Jason watched as Emily stepped back from Derek before turning to throw a look over her shoulder at Hotch. That look had Jason holding his breath—it was filled with a naked challenge that basically told Hotch he had a lot of work to do if he wanted to preserve whatever relationship he had going with the woman.

Jason wondered what the younger man would do. If he'd be brave enough to fight for whatever it was he wanted from Emily Prentiss.

Jason retreated quietly as the team all piled inside Dave's cabin, most laughing and joking about who would be stuck sleeping on the front porch and who got the loft beds. Jason was strangely reluctant to leave, but he couldn't force himself to walk up and knock on Dave's door. Not yet.

Hotch wasn't the only coward when it came to personal relationships. Jason was, too.

(This one has been on my mind—in some ways—for a long time, although Minimal Loss is a recent episode, I always wondered what happened to Gideon, and had several scenarios with him and Emily/Hotch in mind. This one worked best, I think. This is my first time writing a fic with Gideon in it…Updates will probably be slow, but I am working on all my stories…just please be patient…and don't ask when I'll update…just know that I will….sometime….I do solemnly swear I will!)