Hello and welcome to 100 Ways To Annoy Lord Beckett! First off, these are all my original ideas. I tried really hard not to copy any other "Ways to Annoy.." stories, so if I did I am truly sorry. Now, don't anybody think that because I made this I don't like Beckett, I adore the man. I love him sooo much, so don't think this is to make fun of him. I was really annoyed one night when I was writing a story and got stuck. I looked over, saw a picture of Beckett on my wall and came up with this. This is for pure fun, so no flames please. Enough of me, so R&R!!
Tell him your Grandma has the same wig that he does.
Lock all his tea away in a cupboard and hide the key.
When he asks you why you did that, reply in a concerned tone "I'm cutting you off."
When he speaks to you in public, suddenly shout "ATTEMPTED RAPE!" really loud and run away.
When people accuse him of playing with dolls, get all possessive and say "They're action figures!"
Dress up like him and film yourself playing with dolls.
Show this video to him acting like it's him in the video and say "There is therapy, you know."
Paint his nails pink while he sleeps.
While he's sleeping, take his wig and "accidentally" set it on fire.
Tell him you daydream of the both of you frolicking in a field of daises.
Send Mercer a secret admirer note admitting your "undying" love for him and sign it from Beckett.
"Accidentally" call him Captain Jack Sparrow.
When he greets you, reply with "Sup?"
Dye all his white clothes either black or pink.
When he's in an important meeting, randomly burst in crying and yelling, "You said you would be a good father! How am I supposed to bring you child into this world when you beat me every other night?!? HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?!? I THOUGHT YOU WERE MY SUGARLUMPKINS!!!!!"
Buy him heels for Christmas.
Sing the "Striped Sweater" song all the time, even when he's not wearing one.
Tape a sign on his back that says "I love rainbows."
Don't tell him it's there.
Tell him you know his secret. When he says he doesn't know what you are talking about, say sarcastically, "Suuuuuure you don't."
When you're talking in low voices in public, randomly shout out "I will NOT sell you drugs, you sick-o!!"
Throw sugar cubes at him. When he asks who did it, point to a nearby person and run away.
Run up behind him one day and say "Pardon me, miss." When he turns around, say "Oh, sorry. My bad." And walk away.
Straighten his wig. (As in with a flat iron)
Wake him up by dumping freezing water on him.
Buy him a sparkly tiara and proclaim him "Queen of the Caribbean."
Only talk in a really high pitched voice.
Put a whoopee cushion in his seat right before an important meeting.
Paint his hand while he's asleep, so when he wakes up he thinks he has "Th Black Spot".
Sell his wig on e-bay.
Sell Mercer on e-bay.
Laugh hysterically every time he says the word "intently."
Never call him Lord Beckett, only Cutler.
Run up behind him in public, force a pink purse in his hands and say "You dropped you purse a while back. I would've caught up to you sooner, but you were skipping too fast."
Put pictures of kangaroos in his office – ALL OVER.
Every time he tries to take them down, squirt him with a spray bottle and say sternly "NO!"
Knit him a terrible scarf, and when he doesn't wear it, shout "But I thought we had something – something SPECIAL!!"
Tell him he has no friends because he is so short.
Call hi pet names constantly.
Replace all his shoes with stiletto heels.
Put a worm down his shirt.
Give him a carrot every hour, make sure he eats it!
Buy him a bra.
Make him wear it.
Stuff tissues down his shirt and tell everyone that he stuffs his bra.
Make him watch High School Musical. When his eyes start to burn tell him that it's all part of the experience.
Paint him blue.
Make all of his belongings colour coated.
Make him listen to rap.
Quote Captain Jack.
Talk like a pirate.
Make him talk like one on TLAP day.
Pretend to be his conscience. Tell him to do odd things in a ghost voice while waving your arms wildly in the air.
Send him fan mail.
Sign it from his navy.
Sing really badly when he's not paying attention to you.
Make him wear a skirt.
Take a picture of him wearing it and post it on the Internet.
Lock yourself in his room and insist you won't come out until he says he loves you.
When he refuses to say that, threaten to jump out the window.
When he points out you're on the ground floor, pout and call him a meanie-stupid.
Repeat everything he says in an odd voice.
Buy him a teddy bear, name it Mercer and put it next to his pillow.
Paint "Pytratez rok!!" on his front door.
Make him watch Dora.
Give him a flying tackle hug.
Ask him if you look fat.
When he says yes, slap him across the face, call him a whore and run away.
Clip his nails and give him a French mani/pedi.
Make him wear striped knee socks.
Put on a monster mask. In the middle of the night, wake him up with it inches from his face.
Spread the rumour that he wets his bead.
Put a pair of "Grammy panties" on his hat when he's not looking.
Take a very important paper and write "Cutler loves his kitten whiskers!" all over it.
But him a flower necklace and make him wear it.
Every day when it turns 6:09, sing the Goofy Goober song. AM and PM.
Serenade him at work when he's in an important conference.
Spray him with whipped cream every time he says "king"
When he says the word "hate", force a piece of soap in his mouth and tell him "Potty talk is NOT allowed in my presence!"
Make him carry a purse with lipstick, tampons, and a brush in it.
Make him sit down and solve a Rubix cube. Don't let him move until he solves it. When he moves, make him start over no matter how close he was to finishing it.
Make him model your clothes for you.
Every day at 4pm, sing really loudly "Everything stops for tea!"
When it's Easter, dress him up as the Easter bunny and throw eggs at him.
Skip around him in circles for 3 minutes every day while singing the muffin man song.
Draw on his face with sharpie.
Teach him how to hula hoop.
Make a sock puppet and use that and only that to talk to him.
Spray hi with lilac perfume.
Video tape him doing something stupid and put it on you tube.
Set him up on a blind date.
With Mercer.
Make them go.
Before they go, fuss over Cutler and say "My little hunny-bun is growing up!!"
Follow him around and put a car freshener on everything he touches. I mean EVERYTHING.
Put an EITC flag on a dartboard and throw darts at it.
Make him a soufflé.
When he refuses to eat it, cry hysterically.
Make him a doormat out of an EITC flag.
Talk to him about your current crush and ask advice on how to talk to him.
Yes, that was 100 ways. You read it, so please review!! It takes two seconds, the button is right there, so what's stopping you?