Disclaimer: I own nothing, it all belongs o Stephenie Meyer.

This is my second posted FanFiction, ever. So please, be gentle and tell me what you think and if it's worth going on. I've got a good plot line set up, at least.

Chapter One: Cullens Hate The Culinary Arts

EPOV

I sighed. Another day, another boring half an hour sitting in the dreary cafeteria with nothing to do but stare morosely at the tray of inedible junk in front of me. At least there was only a week left of school before summer break. I, for one, couldn't wait. But, in the meantime, the river of voices in my head was safely tuned out, and I prepared to sit out this torture in silence.

Today was Monday. My least favorite day, of all the days in this week. I knew my negative feelings were shared by many a human, but my motives were entirely different. This Monday, Bella wasn't in school with me. She was in Florida, visiting her mother and stepfather for some reason or another, and causing me crippling, yet discreet, pain. I pined for her touch and her voice; every moment without her reminded me of those awful months when I had made the most idiotic and imprudent mistake of my very long life, when I'd left her.

I groaned, my head thumping to the table in despair. If Bella knew the pain she caused me in her absence, she would be forevermore afraid to leave me, and so I'd be causing her an eternal inconvenience. I could never do that to her, so here I am, moaning and banging my head on cafeteria tables.

Come on, Edward. Alice chided me hopelessly in her head, shaking my shoulder. She's coming back tomorrow, so quit your moping and get on with your life. "You're making Jasper depressed." She added out loud.

Jasper nodded in agreement, sending a silent wave of joy my way. I fought it off effortlessly, my depressive feelings overpowering Jasper's ability. He sighed, giving up.

"I'll be going to class. Your emotions are starting to make me claustrophobic."

I shrugged as he departed the table, dumped his tray, and promptly exited the double doors leading towards the east hallway and his English class.

Emmett was busy, with Rosalie watching him disapprovingly, using his vampire speed and reflexes, throwing random objects of food at Mike Newton, occasionally Eric Yorkie, Lauren Mallory, or Jessica Stanley, and Tyler Crowley. The pieces of food were small, rolled up or squashed down into bullet-sized ammo. It was funny to see Newton slapping the back of his neck every five minutes, having been hit at vampire speed by a pea or a piece of rolled up cheese, and then looking around suspiciously for the culprit. He was so obtuse. My feelings of hatred were only increased by the fact he fancied my Bella. Oh, how I missed her!

At last, the lunch bell rang, signifying that we had only three minutes to get to our next classes. Rosalie, Emmett, and Alice leaped up and immediately departed for their next classroom. I, at a much slower pace, chucked my tray and all of the uneaten food on it into the nearest trash can, and gloomily shuffled off towards Biology II. This was the class I would be most lonely in; Bella sat next to me, and I would feel especially miserable with the unusually cold and empty seat by my side.

The moment I sat down at my forlorn lab table, the intercom came on, hurting my extra sensitive ears and making me cringe infinitesimally.

"WILL EMMETT, ALICE, AND EDWARD CULLEN, ALONG WITH ROSALIE AND JASPER HALE PLEASE REPORT TO THE OFFICE. THANK YOU." The shrill voice of Ms. Cope signed off with a beeeoop sort of sound.

I froze as everyone in the classroom turned their chairs to stare at me with an astounded expression. Even the teacher eyed me incredulously.

Cullen? To the office? This is like, school history… Was what most people were thinking along the lines of. It was true, too. Never before had my family or I been called up to the front office. We were vampires, for goodness sakes! We never needed doctor or dentist appointments, as we could never get sick and had perfect teeth, we never got into trouble, we all had perfect records and grades… what could they want?

I sighed, and stood up, avoiding everyone's penetrating gaze as I swiftly and silently exited the room. The desolate hallways seemed to darken as I strode apprehensively towards the front office. As I approached, I could hear the anxious thoughts of my siblings; I would be the last to arrive.

The door creaked ominously, like in an old horror film, as I slowly opened it and entered the warm office.

My siblings were gathered calmly near the far corner of the office, murmuring low worries and profanities, in Alice's case. I quickly tuned on to her thoughts, but to no avail, she was too busy distressing over whatever was going to happen. As if that made me feel any better. I went to join my family in silence.

"Excuse me, children." An authoritive voice broke the almost inaudible buzzing of my siblings' conversations. The principal, Ms. Smith, had appeared in the doorway to her office, "Will you please join me?" She held her arm out, gesturing towards her office, and stepped aside so we could walk past her.

As we obliged, my siblings began bombarding me with thoughts like, What the hell could she want from us? and What if she knows we're vampires? and What has Alice seen? She wouldn't tell me…I simply shook my head and shrugged so fast that the principal wouldn't have a hope of seeing it.

And so we sat, crammed uncomfortably into a long, faded, red leather couch in front of the principal's desk. We stared at Ms. Smith expectantly, perfect expressions of innocence etched on each of our faces.

Her mind was working infuriatingly slow, full of thoughts like, They are so hot…WAIT! I'm 32 years old…can't be thinking like that…what I wouldn't do to get the bronze-headed guy to come home with me and…I cringed, tuning her out. Finally, she stopped ogling us and began, "Children, it has come to my attention that, in the lunch room, you never appear to consume any form of food or drink. You buy it, but…well, we are becoming rather concerned." But their bodies are worth it…

This spelled trouble. Not only because she was having uncensored thoughts about us, but because the issue of our eating habits had never actually been discussed. In other words, we didn't have an explanation ready.

"Oh, but Ms. Smith, that's not true. We do eat things, but not in school. And we're vegetarians." Rosalie was playing the innocent and laughably ironic 'vegetarian' card, but Ms. Smith still looked skeptical.

"Why wouldn't you eat things in school?"

Rosalie shifted uncomfortably in her seat, her eyes flickering to us pleadingly, "Our parents don't encourage us to, because they believe it's not very healthy." It sounded like a question.

"Well, in that case, why don't you ever pack your lunch? It's wasteful to buy food and not eat it."

This time, Emmett spoke up, his tone mildly melodramatic, "We have very busy schedules. Between eating, sleeping, school, and other things, we just don't have time to pack lunches. Our parents are even busier than us, so they can't do it either." I resisted the urge to laugh. The way Emmett said eating and sleeping, he made it seem like they were dirty cuss words.

"And we buy the food for a moral cause. It goes to our good friend, Bella." Jasper added quickly.

"Ah, yes. Miss Swan. It's unfortunate she could not be in school today. I was hoping to talk to her, as well." Ms. Smith sighed.

Why would Ms. Smith want to talk to Bella? She was the only one out of us who did eat. There should be no reason for her to have to come here.

Ms. Smith seemed to pick up on the dubious note left in the air, so she proceeded to explain, "Alright. Let's just get to the point," She started hurriedly, "From an anonymous source,"-Ah, Mike Newton, what a nice boy…always honest and caring…I grimaced at this. Of course. Newton.- "I have come to become concerned for your well being when it comes to diet. You never appear to eat or drink any sort of cuisine or beverage, and so it has come to my knowledge that you may have possible eating disorders." She stopped and raised her index finger, "But, today you have told me you just don't eat in school, so my fears are lessened. However, as all of you are among the top students in this school, I have the right to be worried about you, and so, I have gathered funds from the district to send you all, including Miss Swan, to Culinary Arts Summer Camp for help." And with that, she smiled a broad, toothy smile that stretched her thin face until I was sure it would split.

Silence. Hypothetical cricket noises could be heard. Even everyone's mind was blank. We all stared, thunderstruck, at Ms. Smith. Not a sound could be heard, except for her frenzied heartbeat as she started having explicit fantasies about Jasper.

Abruptly, everyone burst out,

"COOKING?!" Emmett cried, "HOLY SHIT!"

"Language, Mr. Cullen!" Ms. Smith admonished sternly.

"No thank you Ms. Smith, that's really not necessary!" Jasper began becoming slightly hysterical at the prospect of being surrounded by human food, and started hyperventilating unnecessarily, as he didn't really need to breath. However, his feelings of hysteria began circulating through the room, and so, we all became flustered and panicked.

"No need! No need! NO NEED!" Wailed Rosalie, who started twitching nervously.

"Of course there is a need, dear. Even if you don't need it, it will be a memorable experience." Ms. Smith chastised gently.

"Why would Bella need to attend?" I asked nervously, more concerned for Bella's happiness than mine, at this point. She shouldn't have to suffer for my family's… "vampirism".

"Well, Mr. Cullen, I have extensively discussed your relationship with Bella with, ehm, another anonymous source," - Jessica Stanley. What a sweet girl…Ugh. I groaned internally. - "and have come to the conclusion that Miss Swan's participation will help you along the path to well being." Great. Just GREAT. I sniffed involuntarily, a buried human instinct, while Ms. Smith eyed me apprehensively.

Suddenly, I felt the need to do something. I…I could…you know… jump off a cliff! Or cut myself! Or… or… WAIT! "Jasper!" I hissed angrily at vampire speed. He straightened himself from his pitiful hunched-over position on the couch and gave me a sheepish glance. I let out one last dry-sob, and composed myself quickly. Jasper would pay in due time. I refocused my attention to the argument at hand.

"Our parents wouldn't approve!" Begged Alice desperately, wringing her small hands wildly.

"Don't worry, I already called them for approval. Chief Swan as well."

"THEY APPROVED?!?!" We all shrieked simultaneously.

She seemed flustered to have a bunch of panic-stricken "human" teenagers yelling at her and, so her voice became small and meek. "Well, yes."

Silence, again. I wondered why Carlisle and Esme would possibly agree. Didn't they love us? Didn't they? I suddenly found myself feeling unwanted and unloved, for no apparent reason at all, until Emmett smacked Jasper over the head and hissed, "Control yourself!"

And then the sixth period lunch bell rang. This was our chance to escape, I couldn't let it go. How cliché, saved by the bell.

"Excuse me, Ms. Smith. My siblings and I are anxious to return to our classes, and we wouldn't want to miss out on anything, now would we?" I used the most sultry tone I could conjure up, and burned my eyes into her shallow blue ones with an intensity I only saved for Bella. But this was an emergency.

She stopped breathing, and her heart rate picked up. Her mind was wiped as blank as a white board. How disturbing.

"O-of c-course, Mr. C-cullen." She managed to sputter out, knocking her horn-rimmed glasses askew.

Huh. We didn't need telling twice. We almost literally flew out the room, fast as we dared go without raising suspicion. Everyone was seething quietly about the "Culinary Arts Camp". What sort of ludicrous inspiration could possibly stir up that idea! And WHY would Carlisle and Esme accept? It could quite possibly blow our cover, and thoroughly humiliate all of us in the process! I was going to have to have a word with my parent figures when I got home.

Sighing, I found myself counting the seconds until Bella would arrive back in my arms.

So, what do you think? This was a bit of a filler chapter, but hey… we all have to start somewhere. Any advice? Suggestions? I'm new to FanFiction, so any help is appreciated.

Review, please! It would thoroughly make my day!