Why is the Easter Bunny kissing my mom?
(Sister Fanfiction of Why is Santa Claus kissing my mom?)
Fhb
PG.13
Disclaimer: Watsuki Nubuiro and Sony Comics Inc. holds full right to Rurouni Kenshin and Rurouni Kenshin characters.
Syn: Kaoru wants Kenji to believe in the Easter bunny this time, AGAIN, she's making daddy Battousai dress up in the goofy outfit, apparently Bunny-Battousai finds a new way to drag Kaoru into the Easter loving…
Dedicated to Half-breed-demon-fox or Noner89- for the commitment of wanting a continuation to this fan fiction's sister.
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This fanfiction has no sexual material. No lemon. It is therefore a clean fic. It does however have suggestive material which could be misinterpreted.
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Ahh, here we are again! Together viewing the Himura's lifestyles. Hmm…who wouldn't agree that the family ages, that people change, and that the parents await a new edition to the family. As the Americans say, let the games begin.
Once upon a time, there lived a husband and a wife…and a little boy, whom was quite enthusiastic to see Santa Claus, Barney, Mc-Donald's Ronald and ahh, the Easter bunny--. The three happily lived together in the warmth and peace of their nicely crafted shack, a huge establishment which was slickly nestled along Tokyo coastline, that was trimmed to perfection with beautiful white sands and Caribbean style Palm trees.
"Mom, how come you're running the Easter parade?" asked Kenji innocently whom was sitting on his bed quietly, feet folded and hands propped on his face. There seem to be a lot of uncertainty filmed across his small face, which made him look incredibly adorable.
"I mean isn't that a man's job?" he asked curiously, biting his lips in wonder.
Kaoru giggled seeing her son so adorable and of course focused at his question telling. She thought a bit and then collected the small bundle of joy in her embrace…
Kaoru Himura was a good mother, she was young true, but her heart was great, she was often a great supporter, a great trendsetter and a wonderful role-model for children. She gave great advice and often made situations easy to comprehend. Petting her son gently, she thought to herself.
"Kenji-chan, women do a lot of important jobs in the world…" she touched his nose which made him slightly giggle, yet curiosity still meddle in the shadows of his face.
"But I always thought ladies were weak and couldn't handle a man's job. Women aren't very strong, and even in the bible mom, women were the second greatest creation of god. So how come you have a man's job?" asked the little boy most innocently, his amber eyes burning incredibly bright. Everything was like liquid deciphering in those pools.
"Well you see Kenji, long ago women didn't have the rights like men. But really Kenji, men and women do deserve to have the same rights. Don't you like it when everyone is treated equal? It's completely fair for the female population to have the same privileges as men. If a man can do something, why not can't a lady do it? It's because you think we're weak? Perhaps…but you never know, it may even surprise you if a lady does it better…hmm?" she kissed his cheek and he understood her.
"Kenni understands" he nodded…
"Hmm, but Kenji-chan, can I ask you a question?" asked Kaoru curiously
"Hai okaa-san" he nodded
"Who gave you the impression women are weak?" she asked
"Daddy" the response was simple. No lies flowed…
Kaoru darkened. 'That monkey of a husband…'
"Okay sweetheart, time for bed" she tucked him in then gently kissed him on the head.
"I love you…" she whispered
"Kenni loves you to" he smiled sweetly.
"Nighty-nite, don't let the bed-bugs bite" she silently spoke and with that she took off his lamp and placed on his night-light…
Walking down the dark hall for a few minutes she became familiarized with what Kenji told her. 'So my husband thinks we females are weak…well then I got one heck of a surprise for him'
A black Jaguar X-j was parked around 1:15am into the Himura's parking lot. A black form came out the car and shut the door, walking up the steps he saw all the lights were off. 'How odd---Kaoru didn't wait for me, and it's loving night…ughhh!'
The man walked up the steps exhausted as ever from work. His boss Hiko Serjirou was not the nicest of beasts in the field of comprehension. Though Kenshin was the original founder of Battousai Inc. it didn't bypass that Hiko had main control since he was Kenshin's father, non-biological though. Kenshin sighed feeling very stressed and sore, he needed Kaoru to give him a good massage. Entering their room, he was about to flip on the switch when it came on surprisingly by none other than "Kaoru??" Kenshin question innocently, seeing her sitting in a black dress with tight gloves and messy hair.
There was however a wicked tension in the air. A very deceiving one which matched the hue of evilness in Kaoru's eyes.
"Kenshin baby" she started silvery her eyes never leaving him…
"Baby…you waited…" he started while taking off his jacket and going to her.
"Of course I would…besides, we the weak gender need to" she whispered the ending.
"Nani, did you say something?" he asked
"No no!" she brought a smile against her face, the end of her lips going upright in sly smirk.
Kenshin didn't trust Kaoru, he didn't like how she composed herself, she often was never this giving to him in their love making and to see her here so free and naughty, was almost alittle too easy to get. Yet he took the bait she offered.
Her kissed her cheek while she sat on the chair, not amused, or responsive. Her eyes darted to him and he caught it. He stepped back and took a long look of query at her.
"What's the matter?" he asked
"Why did you tell Kenji females are weak?" she asked
"I didn't tell him that" Kenshin knew how defensive Kaoru was about feminine rights and all this women yadiya.
"Well why did he ask me why am I running the Easter parade if that's 'suppose' to be a man's job?" she asked while getting up in a quick shot.
"I dunno" Kenshin turned from Kaoru. He was tired, stressed and not to mention fedup.
"Oh you better tell me yo" she started to sound like the ghetto again.
"Himura Kaoru…I love you a lot, and I try to protect you because---I afraid…" he almost shouted in her face.
"Of what?" she asked indignantly
"Of losing you. Oh geez Kaoru can't you see it every time I hold you, every time I make love to you, every time I kiss you. I'm so darn careful with you, that I often think I'll be the killer of you. I'm afraid Kaoru…that if I could, I'd protect you from myself. But seems almost impossible…" he whispered the end.
Kaoru was in shock, "what gave you that idea?" she asked…
"From how my life is becoming very flicked up" he sounded rather cold.
Kaoru shuddered from how he spoke. It reminded her of long ago when she had met him, he was so cold.
"Hey" she touched his shoulder. He didn't turn, "I'm talking to you bishouhen" she spoke…
He turned around and looked at her in the eyes, his eyes drunk with a cold sadness.
"I love you, so don't think you'll lose me by your hands. I love you Kenshin---god---I really am madly in love you, and I think as my lover, you shouldn't think that way…" she spoke. He was about to protest when she placed a slim finger on his lips. Hushing him she said everything was going to be a-okay.
Kenshin slanted his way to kiss his wife when the phone rang. The both were startled and backed up. Kaoru picked up the phone and spoke
"Hello"
"Hello Mrs. Himura…hi it's the Tokyo's Mall Manageress" spoke a oldish sounding woman…
"Yes…" Kenshin kissed Kaoru
"I wanted to tell you about our newest problem" the old woman spoke
"What's it about?" Kenshin kissed again
"Well it's about the Easter bunny we hired"
"Oh baby…I want more loving" Kaoru sputtered
"What??" the woman asked in shock…OO???'
Kaoru opened her eyes in shock, she couldn't believe that came out…
"Oh…I'm sorry…" Kaoru blushed and with that pushed Kenshin on the bed.
"It's alright. Mrs. Himura we don't have an Easter bunny for tomorrow, the children are gonna be so disappointed. I think we will have to cancel the show…" spoke the woman
"No--no, aren't there substitutes?" she asked worriedly
"I'm afraid we don't have any…"
"Oh man…"
"Should I cancel the show Mrs. Himura?" asked the woman…
"Um….no, I'll get a one…count on it…in fact I already do"
"Okay great. By the way what's the person's name?"
Kaoru looked around and her eyes settled on her only resort…
"Kenshin…" she whispered
Kenshin looked at her seeing love in her eyes…
"Well alright. Take care. Bye"
"Yah, bye" Kaoru bade, very unsure of all of this. She knew Kenshin hated these sorta situations. She remembered how he reacted last year when she asked him to be Santa-claus, imagine how he'd react to be a bunny. Oh kami!! But hey it was worth a shot, it doesn't hurt to try…
"Oh Kenny" she called so silvery.
He walked to her and she walked to him.
"Have I ever told you how much I loved you?" she kissed him
"Only a million times…why?" he asked
"Because I love you so indescribably. And…um, you feel like that for me too, ne?" she asked girlishly
"Yes koishi. Okay baby, what are getting at?" he asked giving her the straight up face.
"Hehehe!! What are you talking about anata?" she twirled his hair…
"This…Kaoru I know when you're up to something" he spoke firmly…
She pushed him back on the bed and crawled to him, "are you infatuated by me?" she asked
Kenshin crawled back…
"Do you want me?" she bit her lips…
Kenshin had it, pulling her by the hands he pushed her into the bed and looked into her eyes.
"Kaoru tell me exactly what you think you're doing" he spoke indignantly
"I'm seducing you, heheheeh?" she laughed
"Why?" he asked quizzically…
"Because…I need your help" she began crying…
"For?" he asked…
"Promise you wouldn't shout?" she pouted cutely…
He nodded. "Well the Mall manageress told me that they can't get an Easter bunny, or a substitute, but I told them I had one…" she sniffled
"And where's the part that I come in" he asked not liking the sound of this
"I told them his name is Kenshin"
"YOU WHAT??" he shouted…
"Oh come on Kenshin. I really need your help…please" she begged
"OH no baby, remembered what happen last year, I was Santa and lemme tell you babe, I didn't like it. I'm not going to be a bunny toots so the end" he spoke in finality
"Please kenni" she begged
"Hell no Kaoru, there's no way you can force me to go. Besides I'm really going to be looking like a goof-ball when people see it's Battousai whose in the bunny outfit." he assured
"Oh come now Kenshin, it's not like I'm asking you to do it for me---well yes I am, but hey, its for the children your son as well. Think of their little faces smiling and giggling at the bunny…" she smiled
"Uh---no! Kaoru I'm not doing it and that's final" he spoke deeply
She started to cry and Kenshin smirked. "Forgot I saw this last year, you and your fake tears…" he smile evilly.
"Fine Kenshin. I hope you could live with the bastard you are when you see all those small children disappointed. I hope you could live with the guilt of being their grief" she spoke lecherously. Her eyes a distant shade of cobalt blue. Kenshin never seen Kaoru so angry.
She took up a robe and went out the door. "Good night" she spoke and shut the door on him…
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Later on that night
"Kaoru---Kaoru" Kenshin called
"What?" came that sassy reply
"We need to talk" he spoke while placing on the light.
When he placed it on he saw her on the couch watching her wedding ring. He swallowed when he saw her lethargically looking at it.
"Kaoru…why can't you chose something easier…?" he asked
"I only asked for one thing"
"But come on Kaoru, Battousai in a bunny outfit?"
"You know Kenshin, I've realized something with you"
"Oh?"
"No matter how wonderful you are, you're always reluctant to our sons wants, to children. You've lost your touch, why?" she asked
"I told you already, I had a bad life" he scratched his head
"Then don't make your life your sons one. Children are really wonderful Kenshin, I know, because I've raised a healthy boy and I'm having another. Hence I'm a pediatrician, so it's a blessing to help children."
"Joy"
"I'll ask you again, just one last time, Kenshin Please! I really need to your help as an Easter bunny! Please my dearest husband! I'll do anything" she spoke
"Anything??" there was an evil sparkle in his eyes
Kaoru backed up inspecting her husband's eyes, "did I say anything…??" she laughed coyly
"Mmm! I believe you did!" he watched his nails…
"Please don't make it too costly now" she begged…
"Uh uh uh! Don't take me as a fool. I want something weather it's costly or not--outha yuh big girl" he spoke
"Like what?"
"What any Easter bunny could want, an Easter bunny wife" he smiled…
"HAH! Boy you got to be joking me…" she laughed
"It's what I want babe--hence I'm doing it for the children" he spoke
"Alrightie…" she spoke and with that took off the lights
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"Kaoru" spoke Kenshin uncertainly…
"Yes?" retorted Kaoru
"Kaoru I'm kinna having second thoughts about this---I look like a pathetic dork" Kenshin confessed…
"No--I find you look very cute and soooo adorable" she spoke…
"That's what you said last year. Look at me Kaoru I'm fat, overgrown and pink…I can't handle this" he screamed.
"Maa maa Kenshin, its for the children" she teased…
"Careful baby…this bunny is on edge" he spoke…while walking to the manageress.
Along came Kenji and his little friends. Megumi and Sano's two boys and little daughter, and Misao and Aoshi's two sons. Megumi's little daughter was the youngest and had a huge crush on Kenji. It was adorable to see how he hated her and she just adored him.
"Hey mom" Kenji spoke…
"Hey sweetheart, what are you doing here?" she asked
"We're looking for the Easter bunny so we thought you may know where he is, since you're like running the show" he spoke
"Um…actually I do" she spoke
"Really?" they chirped
"Yup"
"Where is he?" asked Lily, Sano's and Megumi's daughter
"There koishii" Kaoru pointed…
The boys saw the bunny and grinned.
Kaoru then felt a tug and looked down when she saw Lily, she stooped and listened on. "Thank you auntie-Kaoru" the child spoke cutely
"Sure thing sweetheart" and with that the children were off.
The children saw the Easter bunny and stopped when they saw the line of children gathered to have chocolate.
"You guys…I really want some of that chocolate" spoke Kenji
"Yeah me too" spoke one of Megumi's son's known as James
"Yeah but how are we gonna get it? By waiting in a line?" asked Lily
"Hell no!!" the boys shouted
"What then?" Lily asked
"Lets raid his ass" James spoke
Gasps from Lily "You said the A word, you're gonna get it" Lily informed
"Hush up doll" Kenji shut her up…
"Alright guys---I gotta plan" Kenji spoke and gathered everyone.
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"Oh my set we go…" spoke Kenji and with that he walked to the bunny…
Touching the bunny he called for the crew and they ran in.
Meanwhile Kaoru was entertaining Megumi, Sano, Aoshi and Misao. She was telling them about her pregnancy. Everyone congratulated her on her second demon child that the Battousai had given her, then there was a scream and everyone turned to the children. It was the most shocking thing, there in the distance was a bunch of small children, their children to be specific. They were beating up the Easter bunny. Oh kami, Kenshin definitely wasn't gonna do Kaoru any more extreme favors. The children stole Kenshin's chocolate leaving him battered.
Kaoru went to Kenshin and assisted him. "Are you okay?" she asked worriedly
His eyes were swirly. "Oh…look at the pretty butterflies" he spoke goofily and with that he went black…
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Kenshin was back at it in a couple of minutes. The only reason he was here was because Kaoru would be showing up in her bunny suit he bought her. The best thing about this was that because Kaoru was a woman of her word, she had to show in what he bought for her. Kenshin laughed to himself while giving each kid a chocolate. Most children freaked out when they saw the evil man-hunter expression their favorite bunny placed on.
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Kaoru got ready to put on her bunny outfit Kenshin had requested and bought for her, little did she know she was in for a big surprise. Opening the baggage, she lifted the material and freaked at what she saw, she read the company it was bought from and knew perfectly what they profession in. (use imagination please). She couldn't believe it. It was a parade and he had the nerve. Kaoru huffed out the room and walked down the steps. She saw her husband had a huge line of children. She congratulated herself on her idea, but her husband was still gonna face death. Death in colours. Walking up the isle, she passed many crying children and babies who had been waiting for sometime. There he was in his Easter bunny outfit sharing chocolate for the children. Kaoru stood in front of him and snapped her fingers when she found him day-dreaming. He jumped and innocently wondered why she wasn't in the sassy clothing.
"So did it fit snug---I bought the smallest they had" he flashed a stare at her…
"Oh it did! Easter bunny you need a time out" and with that she aware the crowd that the bunny was on his water-break. Kenshin and Kaoru went into a lone area and began speaking.
"Kenshin…I saw the bunny outfit" she started sweetly. Her words were dripping nectar. Kenshin touched her cheek, "I knew you'd like it. So did you come downstairs to thank daddy for the bunny outfit?" he asked devilishly
"Oh hell yeh" she looped her hands around his neck and then began choking him.
"You inconsiderate man, you bought me a playboy bunny outfit, I can't wear that…" Kaoru spoke…
"Owww!" he groaned
"I can't believe you Kenshin" Kaoru spoke angrily
"Well believe me baby, that I'm crazy for you" he flashed a bishouhen smirk in her direction.
"Golly!" she spoke lethargically.
"Kenshin I'm afraid our lil deal is off" Kaoru aware
"Alright, no you, no show" he spoke
"What?" she asked shocked
"I told you already Kaoru, if I can't have what I want, then no show. It's only fair babes. I don't make the rules, I just follow" he notified…
"Aggh!! But I can't go out there looking like a –ar bad girl. People will think I'm whack" she retorted
"It's still a bunny outfit Kaoru, true it's a little vulgar, but you can still wear it." he reckoned
She face-faulted. "Nooo I can't. Because little boys and girls would become blind from what they'd see" she rattled
"Well that's their problem babes. I can't contort for them, they gotta contort for me…" he touched her cheek.
"Come on Kenshin, cut me some slack, please…" she pouted her lips…
"No baby" and with that he took her lips and gave her a deep kiss.
"You're so evil" she groaned.
Meanwhile, the small group of children had been looking for Kaoru. James went along a lone area and couldn't believe what he saw. He snapped his fingers to get the others attention and in disbelief they watched on, none as shocked at Kenji. In the distance Kenji saw his mother kissing the Easter bunny. He was infuriated. Just last year Santa Claus kissed her and now, the Easter bunny was kissing her. Kenshin and Kaoru kissed, enjoying the next proximity, the fires of their eyes the fuel of their souls. It continued on for several minutes until Kenji had it.
"Stop right there bud" shouted Kenji…
Both Kenshin and Kaoru backed up.
"Why are you kissing my mom? Huh? Just last year Santa was kissing her and now you're at it too?" asked Kenji in a sorta screaming voice…
"Well what can I say, she's a babe" Kenshin spoke
"Yeah, well that's my dad's babe. She's married asshole! Did you get that in your brain pal?" he cursed.
Kaoru wasn't shock, "lemme guess, Sano said that?" asked Kaoru
"No uncle Sano watches a show called South Park which has that word" spoke Kenji innocently.
"Well Kenji-boy, I'm afraid I definitely don't like that word, and you better change your vocabulary…" chastised Kenshin
"Who in heck names do you think you are?" asked Kenji angrily
"Your fath--I mean, your phattest enemy…" spoke Kenshin angrily
"Kiss ass bunny" Kenji cursed
"Kenji-chan" Kaoru gasped in shock
"Hey kid, watch that mouth of yours before I spank yuh" Shouted Kenshin
"Like I said before, k-i-s-s a-s-s--and hard" Kenji shouted and with that he ran into Kenshin to attack him. Kenshin lifted his son and gave him to Kaoru.
"I love yah baby" he kissed his wife and left.
Later on that day Kaoru placed on her bunny outfit and began walking down the steps. She gave Kenji some eggs to hit at the bunny and he agreed. Kaoru walked down the steps with many eyes on her. "Oh's" and "ah's" filled the air and Kaoru couldn't help but blush. She was so adorable as she walked to the Easter bunny. Kenshin couldn't believe his eyes. She was in a lacy fluffy white skimpish looking bunny ouftit. She successfully accomplished that. Kenshin pulled Kaoru to him and kissed her. She gave an evil smile on her face which made him seduced. Aoshi and Misao were amazed when they saw Kenshin was the bunny. Kenshin hid behind Kaoru when the couple hailed him, this only increased the curiosity of the couple beside them, whom was Megumi and Sano. He tried desperately to hide behind Kaoru but she wouldn't allow it, she needed to get fair and square. Kaoru laughed to herself and with that she gave her son and all the other children signal to throw their eggs. One egg was thrown in Kenshin's direction.
"N O O O O O O" he shouted in slow motion trying to catch the egg…
With that he caught the egg and it splattered in his hand. Then a rain of eggs fell on him, all yoking him…
Kaoru stood away from him laughing. Kenshin knew it was her idea, esp when she gave the signal.
"Oh Kaoru" she saw him approaching. Trying to run from him he caught her an embrace.
"Ewww…get off---get off" she screamed…
Kenshin kissed her…
"I love yah baby" he embraced her tightly
"I love yah too ---but get offfffff" she screamed…
"Sorry, no can do. I feel like the Engerizer bunny that wants some solid love" he smooched some more.
"Happy Easter baby" he kissed
"Happy Easter hun" she kissed back loving him all through…
The end…
"Wait up, the story aint done. You still didn't tell me why that stupid Easter bunny was kissing my mom…why?" Kenji asked
"Because he's in lurveeeeee" the audience spoke
Owari
Did this fanfiction contain any sexual material, nope! Well it has suggestive material, but it's enough for a PG. 13 rating. Remember how gives rating. From what I've read, what I've written is good enough and stays in the lines of PG. 13
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An: 1 shot fanfiction contributed to the best couple Battousai and Kaoru. Again I am late with a fic. I was late with my fanfic publicizm 'why is Santa claus kissing my mom?' and now this fanfic. Yeah I know I can't write as good as you, but hey give Fhb some love too!!
Well hoped you liked it…
Please review…